Speed courses through my body, the electricity crackling deep in my bones. My legs move faster than humanly possible and though I'm beginning to tire from the constant fights, my adrenaline is kicking in and overrides my exhaustion. As I'm running through Central City, time seems to slow down. I can feel every bit of my body working, pumping blood throughout my veins and taking in oxygen from my lungs. Though I know I shouldn't be joyful that I'm fighting a villain right now, or that the fate of everyone in the town and everyone I love rests solely in my hands, it's moments like these that I relish. When time seems to stop to almost nothing and I remember why I do what I do in the first place. These moments fade quickly though, and soon I return back to reality, and to the villain at hand. I finally reach my destination and slow to a stop. Though covered by the darkness, I still see him there in the distance: Mark Mardon.
"You know Weather Wizard, these meetings of ours are beginning to get a little old," I say, walking a few steps closer to him. The jewelry shop's alarms can be heard over the sounds of the traffic a few blocks away, and I know this shouldn't be a difficult fight. Simple robbery, simple fight. Simple night. I'll be back in S.T.A.R. Labs with Mark in a meta-human cell in a matter of minutes.
He steps out of the darkness, illuminating his face in the light from the streetlamp above him and responds, "I was just thinking the same thing. Maybe if you'd stay dead for once we wouldn't have to worry about that."
I take another step closer saying, "I don't think that's gonna happen anytime soon."
"I guess we'll see then, won't we?" He lifts his hands up into the air, and tornado like clouds form above his hands. Before I can even think he's hit me with a blast of meta-human powers and I fall backwards, the wind knocked out of me. "Not as good as you used to be, huh Flash?"
"Better," I say. I get up off of my feet and start to sprint around him in circles, the air spinning around us creating a vacuum with Mark in the middle.
Over the noise of the wind, Mark shouts, saying, "You know Flash, I thought that this would happen. Which is why I got a little bit of…insurance." Huh? What? What does he mean? I still keep running, though the unknown threat slows me down a bit. Mark laughs a little before saying, "I never thought you were into blondes." My mind stops. Who is he talking about? I think about all of the girls in my life, Iris, Caitlyn, Felicity, Patty. Wait. I don't know how I know, but I just do. It's Felicity. He has her.
"What have you done with her?!" I scream, still running, though my pace is slowing down.
"It's not what I have done but what I'm about to do," Mark says with a grin. He pulls out a small device from his pocket and clicks a red button in the center of it. "Oops," he says, "guess you gotta make a choice Flash. Me or the girl."
"Caitlyn? Cisco?! What's going on?!" I yell, needing them to tell me what to do. I hear static coming in through the com in my ear, snippets of inaudible words from Caitlyn as I keep running. Of course. Of course the one time I really need them the coms stop working! "Caitlyn! Cisco!" I yell again, hoping that this time they might hear me. But there's still nothing but static. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. Caitlyn and Cisco are seemingly unavailable and Felicity is surely in danger. Though I know I should stay and fight, instinct takes over and I run out of the circle, leaving Mark to his giddy self. I don't know how I know, but I just run, knowing that my feet will lead me in the right direction. I reach an deserted alleyway a few blocks away from my apartment and I freeze. I've seen so many horrible things but somehow, I know this is different. I look around and then I see her, laying on the ground, head propped up against the wall, clutching her side, which is now stained dark red. "Felicity!" I scream, my emotions frazzled. I run down over to her.
"I'm sorry, I just, I was going to surprise you, for your birthday, and I was walking to your apartment and then I realized you moved and was gonna take a cab there and then all of a sudden these guys came out of nowhere and attacked me and took my phone and there was a knife somewhere—I-I tried to move but I know it would just make it worse and I-I tried to yell for help but no one came and I just didn't know what to do I'm so sorry Barry, I'm so sorry," she coughs. Her speech is jumbled and bloody and I know she doesn't have much time. She's been here for much longer than the time it took me to get from Mark to her and I know he ordered his men to hurt her even long before he broke into the jewelry store. He didn't care about the jewelry or the fight or anything, he just wanted to hurt me. I can't speak, my mouth feels dry and all I can do is stare at her. Somehow I swallow and say, "It-it's okay, you're gonna be okay. It's not your fault, you're gonna be fine. I look around for anything to help her but there's nothing. My com's shot and I don't even have a phone. I grab her hands in mine, and start to put pressure on the wound, hoping that will help, but I know it won't make a difference. She's lost too much blood. "Felicity I'm so sorry. I-I don't know what to do." I think of racing her to the hospital but I know she doesn't have enough time and she won't survive the impact of running at full speed through the city. Some part of me knows, that this is it, that she's dying here, right in front of my face and there's nothing I can do to save her. This is what Mark wanted. He didn't care what happened to himself or to Felicity, he just wanted me to feel hopeless and in pain and know that this is all my fault. Her blood is pooling around me now, and her glasses are offset from her face. She's crying and in pain, but I can't think. I'm too stunned and in shock to do anything.
"It's okay Barry, it's okay it's not your fault," she coughs again and her face shines pale in the moonlight. She lifts up the corners of her mouth into a strained smile and a tear slides down her cheek.
"No. Felicity, no, don't do this, you're gonna be okay."
"I'm not, Barry. You and I both know that."
"No this wasn't how it was supposed to happen, it should be me. This shouldn't be happening. You shouldn't be dying and I shouldn't be the Flash and this night should never have happened and Oliver should be here! Oliver should be with you! It shouldn't be me! You love Oliver! Oliver needs to be with you now! I can't do anything for you, you need Oliver!" I'm screaming and crying now and all I can do is focus my energy into holding her hands, her cold, bloody, dying hands.
"It's okay Barry, it's okay, please don't cry it'll all be fine."
"It's not okay! I'm here and Oliver isn't and you're dying and it's all my fault and, and.." my voice trails off into sobs and I turn my head away from her, still grasping her hands tight.
"Barry, please, look at me." Somehow I find the strength to do so and I see she's crying more now too. "Please, listen to me, it's not your fault it's not anyone's fault just please, just know that I love you and it's not your fault and…" her voice catches on another bloody cough, and I think that this is it but she manages to sputter out a few last words saying, "please, just tell him I love him, and, and, tell him, tell him I do." She coughs again, blood coming out of her mouth, and her eyes shut close. It's now that I notice the ring around her finger.
"No! NO! This can't be it! Felicity!" I scream, tears dripping down my face. I still hold on to her hands and won't let go, I will never let go. Static comes back again through my com on my suit and I hear Caitlyn's voice.
"Barry? Barry? What's going on? We lost you. What happened to Mark? Where are you? Are you okay?" I'm crying non-stop now and think, No. I am not okay.
And I will never be.