A Thousand Years:
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, unfortunately! If I did, there would be significantly less death, and a lot more sexy time, but, what can you do? TPTB hold the cards here.
Summary: One thousand years ago, Captain Jack Harkness made a promise. One he never intends to break.
Rating: K+ I guess, nothing major!
Genre: Angst, angst and look, more angst. With a dash of romance, hurt and comfort.
D
I have lived so many lives, met so many people, and seen things you couldn't even begin to imagine.
For a while I had started to think that I had seen and done everything there was to do on this planet. My world seemed to constantly be getting smaller, everything so banal and repetitive.
I spent every day hoping that The Doctor would show up, and would show me a whole new world, give me a new life to live, and new things to experience.
And then, he came along; Jones, Ianto Jones.
He showed up, and he gave me a new perspective, a new lease on life, which is really saying something for an immortal man like myself.
"Would you really have run me over?"
I couldn't help but smirk slightly as I lifted my head to meet his eyes. I turned on my side and propped myself up on my elbow, my hand reaching out and running softly over his sweat covered skin.
"You really were annoying when I met you first, you know that?" I smiled, and pressed a kiss against his head.
"I'd rather go with persistent. But hey, it worked, didn't it?" Ianto smiled, rolling over so he was facing me.
"I'm not sure if it was your persistence, or those tight trousers you wore." I winked, and couldn't help but laugh at the look on his face.
He was silent for a moment, and I knew what he was thinking before he even said it. "Don't do this, Yan.."
"What are we doing, Jack? What is this?"
"It's... You know what this is." I rolled over onto my back, staring up at your ceiling. He sighed slightly, and stood, pulling on his boxers, and I let my eyes close, knowing I had said the wrong thing.
"Yan, come on, don't leave, stay and talk to me."
"But that's the point I'm trying to make, Jack. I can't stay forever. I'm not like you. One day, you're going to have to leave me. You're going to watch me grow old, while you stay the same. While you don't change. And that's if I make it that long. You know the life span of Torchwood agents. Most are lucky to make it to thirty. I'm not like you Jack... I won't come back from things. Most people get to grow old with the person they love, but every day, I grow just a little bit older." Tears glistened in his eyes, and I could see he was trying his hardest to keep himself together.
I jumped up, and held him tight in my arms, letting him dissolve into tears, while I struggled with my own.
"It's not fair, Jack..." He breathed against my cheek.
"I know. I know it isn't. But that doesn't change how I feel about you, Ianto. I love you. And I want to be with you, for however long I can, a moment with you is better than any life I have ever lived, you have to believe me." I pulled back slightly, just to take his face in my hands, making him look at me, and he nodded slowly after a few moments.
"You could be with anyone, Jack.. Anyone, anywhere, on any world."
"But I don't want anyone, Ianto, I want you. You... You changed everything for me. I was giving up. I wanted out of here, I was ready to give up on this life, and then you came along. And you changed everything for me. I can't explain it, but you know I love you."
"It's only you, you know that, don't you? I never liked men, until I met you.. You changed my world too. In so many ways, Jack."
"Well then, we better make it good." I smiled, wiping away his tears with my thumbs, and I pressed a long kiss to his forehead, while his arms circled my waist, pulling me closer to him.
His lips found mine, and this time, there was a desperate, primal need to feel his skin beneath mine, to remind me that he was there, and to remind him that I was too.
I never had the strength to tell him that every day, I was terrified of loosing him. I knew all too well that I was immortal, and he was not. If I had the ability to take it away, if it meant I could grow old with him, I would have done it, in a heart beat.
But, I couldn't.
I knew better than anyone the reputation Torchwood held for young deaths. I was the one who often had to recruit the replacements, knowing they would be lucky if they made it through the first five years.
That drove me to insanity, each time Ianto had to go out, my mind was always on whether or not he was safe.
I know I did a lot to annoy him too. I would disappear, do things my own way, and shut off to everything outside my own head sometimes, but I knew if there was anyone who could get through to me, it was him, and he was the only one who ever had enough patience to try.
There were things I never told him; some I regret, some I am glad he never knew. But, he knew more about me than I ever let anyone else know. And he didn't hate me for it. I have done some dark, unimaginable things in my lifetime, but Ianto always seen the best in me. Always made me believe I had done it for a better reason.
He was my grounding force.
Things haven't been the same without him. I never expected any person to impact my life as much as he did.
I still yearn for him, for his touch, his sweet smile, those kind, understanding words and the unconditional support.
Occasionally, in those brief seconds after I revive, while I lay, gasping for breath, I expect to be in his arms, as I so often was when I was killed. He was always there, holding me, waiting for me.
And I did the same for him.
That day, I held him, I held him so tight, hoping, that if I somehow managed to hold him tight enough, he wouldn't slip away from me. But he did. It was all my fault.
Eventually, I had been able to forgive myself for what happened to Gray. I was just a boy, and he let go of my hand, there was nothing I could have done. I never gave up looking for him. I searched for years and years. And then, I was finally able to forgive myself.
I will never be able to forgive myself for the death of Ianto Jones. There is nothing that can absolve me of that.
There hasn't been anyone since Ianto, I don't think there ever could be.
It still eats away at me that in his last moments, he thought I would forget him. I could never forget him. No amount of retcon could wipe him from my mind.
One thousand years later, I stand alone in Torchwood, where his voice and image still haunts my mind.
My hands are shaking as I reach out and open the drawer, pulling out the frozen box you have rested in for one thousand years.
Tears blur my vision, and I can feel my body trembling, as I allow the memories of that last day slip back to me, consuming me.
"I love you."
"Don't... Ianto, stay with me. Stay with me. Please! Stay with me, please, please..."
"Hey... It was good, yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Don't forget me."
"Never could."
"A thousand years time? You won't remember me."
"Yes, I will. I promise. I will."
Those words ring through my ears still, tears streaming down my face, as I stared down at the blank, white face that I had known so well. The face I kissed each morning and night, the face I watched while he slept, the face that was the source of my strength through so many tough times.
"I will never forget you, Ianto. Never. No matter how many thousands of years pass. I love you."
Tears dripped from my face, pooling together on the glass coffin. I gripped either side of it, the only thing that was holding me up.
With Ianto, I didn't need the whole of outer space to feel excited, to see and feel things that I had never experienced before. Ianto gave that all to me.
No longer able to hold myself up, I slide to the ground, and run my hands through my already dishevelled hair.
"I promise I'll never forget you. You were never a blip. Never."
D
A/N: Okay, my first every Torchwood fic, and more than that, my first ever Janto fic. I'd love your opinions on this guys, good, bad or indifferent :) I want to keep writing some Janto, so I'd love to hear what you think :)