Day 4 of the Pepperony Week, meaning another fanfiction. Also, check out my tumblr for the whole Pepperony Week (aka the days that aren't done in fanfiction style): pottsrescue.
Here we go. Day 3 (Wednesday, July 13): post-cacw
It had been late, almost midnight, when it knocked on her door. Pepper had been answering a few last mails and being quite startled at the sound of the knock. A look at the clock told her the time, which made her frown even more. She couldn't quite imagine who should be visiting her at this time.
Even more so because she didn't have that many closer connections.
But when she opened it, she looked into the face of the last person she expected to see. "Tony? What- What are you doing here?"
He looked bad, worse than the last time she had seen him wounded. There were cuts all over his face, and he looked so pale. Dark circles were under his eyes and she almost gasped at the sight of him. Of course she knew what happened between him and the rest of the team, at least as far as the news went. This wasn't what she had expected.
"Pep, I… Everyone's gone. I couldn't- I didn't know where else to go to. You're the only one.." Who's left, Tony wanted to add, but never finished the sentence. It was obvious how he felt, that he felt alone but couldn't be that. All Pepper wanted to do, was to pull him into a hug.
Instead, she stepped aside, letting him inside the house. Quickly closing the door behind her, she was by his side again, guiding him into the living room to sit down on the white couch. It was as if he might fade and be gone forever, and it made anger rise inside of her. Anger for those who did this to him, for everything that happened. But most of all, for herself.
"Tony, what happened."
His eyes were watery as he lifted his head to look at her. And in this very moment, she could have cried but she had to be strong for him. That was what she always did, being strong for him when he couldn't be. And this time, it was probably more needed than it had ever been. Swallowing hard, Tony began to tell her.
Everything, from the beginning to the end. However, when he came to talk about his parents' death, he couldn't hold back any longer. Silent tears were running down his cheeks as he told her about the murder.
"You know, Pep, I really thought he was my friend, that I could trust him. I was wrong."
Leaning back into the soft cushions of the couch, he put his hands over his face, while Pepper carefully reached out to put a hand on his arm, shaking her head. "I don't think so. He was your friend, he still is. But it's complicated."
And suddenly, he let his hands fall down just to place them on her wrists, not quite daring to take her hands. "I messed it up. That what I always do, I mess things up when they were going well."
Her mouth went dry because she knew he wasn't just referring to the Avengers. He was talking about them as well. And it hurt her. He didn't mess it up, if all they did together. But that was why they needed a break, why it was important. And maybe this was the time to make at least some things right again.
"You don't mess everything up. You mustn't be so hard to yourself. What happened with the team, you couldn't control it, no one could. Some things just have to happen. But Tony, you do wonderful things as well, and you can have wonderful things, too."
He was tired and didn't make any attempt to hide it from her. He never did, Pepper always (or at least most of the time) knew when something was wrong.
"I can't keep doing it like this, Pepper. Eventually, things always go wrong and end bad for me." He sighed, fingers drawing circles over her pulse. "I miss you, and I'm sorry. For everything."
Pepper moved her hands so that they were taking his in hers, squeezing them lightly. "It's not your fault. We both messed up. I- I miss you, too, you know. I didn't want us to go this way."
It felt so good to hear the words from her, her voice echoing in his head. Without really thinking about it, he leaned forward, arms wrapping around her slim form and holding her close and tight as if she might disappear if she didn't. She herself wrapped her arms around him and drawing soothing circles on his back.
"I still love you."
She smiled a bit, holding him close to her while humming. "So do I. We'll work this out, Tony. Everything will be fine, it gets better."
And for the first time in a long time, Tony felt as if it actually could get better, that he had the chance to get better again.
"Thank you." He murmured, pressing a kiss on her hair.
