Sherlock opened the door to his apartment and carried the two shopping bags into the kitchen. Usually John did the shopping but he was a bit stressed recently and Sherlock decided to help him out a little. Placing the bags on the table he took his coat off and sat it across the chair.

"John?"

"Yeah?"

John appeared from the bathroom with a towel draped loosely around his hips. Sherlock eyed him up and down, a smile curving at his lips.

"Aren't you going to put some clothes on?"

"Do you want me to put some clothes on?"

John gave Sherlock a cheeky smile and walked into the kitchen to put the shopping away. Opening the fridge, he turned to Sherlock and said, "Why is there a hand in the fridge?"

"Scientific purposes."

"You mean you want to play with it."

"Not play, experiment."

"Same thing."

John sighed and put the milk in next to the hand. He walked into the living room, checking his laptop for emails. Sherlock came up behind him and looped his arms round his hips.

"You know, this towel is awfully loose..." he teased, his hands threatening to let the towel fall to the ground. "It might fall down at any second..." Sherlocks voice was soft in John's ear.

"You tease!" John chided him.

Sherlock chuckled and placed a kiss on his lips. John closed his eyes, his lips moving in motion with Sherlocks, his bare chest pressed against his suit. Sherlock kissed him more fiercely, his hands on John's back, pulling him closer.

"I've been waiting for this all day," he said, in-between kisses.

"Mm. Less talking, more kissing."

Sherlock laughed and planted a line of soft kisses down John's neck, catching all the water droplets with his mouth. Suddenly John yanked Sherlock back up, and started steering him towards the bedroom. He yanked the suit jacket off Sherlock and tossed it to the floor.

"Careful with that..."

"Shut up."

John was quite aware that his towel had fallen off. To be honest he didn't really care, all he wanted right now was Sherlock. No matter how much of him he seemed to get, it was never enough. Sherlock was like his own personal drug. He kissed him hungrily, his hands making work or Sherlocks shirt buttons. He slid the shirt off and flung it aside, his eyes focused on Sherlock.

"You are so beautiful..." he murmured, pushing him gently onto the bed.

"Beautiful? That's rather feminine."

"Handsome. Better?"

"Better."

Sherlocks heart was racing. John was almost on top of him, keeping himself propped up with his hands. His lips ignited fire against Sherlocks skin, making him yearn for more. Gently, he placed a hand on John's cheek and brought him closer until they were face to face. Effortlessly, he flipped John over and stared into his eyes.

"I don't deserve a man like you, John."

Sherlock noticed tears dripping from John's eyes. Confused, he wiped them away with his thumb.

"What's wrong?" He asked with concern.

"I just, I just can't believe this is happening. I don't deserve this and I don't deserve you. I've spent most of my life such a lonely man, and you changed that. You came along and you showed me danger and excitement and you became my bestfriend. But..but then you left...and I was terrified, Sherlock. I thought I'd never see you, that I'd never get to say how I felt. There were so many times when I thought about ending it, to go and join you. I was s-so close one time, I had the pills in my hand. But a song came on and it reminded me of you. And I couldn't let your death be in vain. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I love you Sherlock, and although you've put me through so much, you've saved me. Thankyou."

Sherlock sat silently through the whole speech. He placed a kiss on John's forehead.

"John Watson, I can not apologise enough for how I hurt you. But I had to, I had to die for you to live. You are so much more than me. You are nice, and kind, and stubborn and you care. I couldn't live without you, you're my John and I wouldn't be the same without you. You're my bestfriend and the only one who I can laugh with...I was also so alone before you, John. So I think it's you, that's saved me."

John smiled widely and pulled Sherlock into a bear hug. His breathing was shaky, it was always hard for him to admit things like this. Sherlock pulled back and wiped away the last of John's tears.

"Why did the song remind you of me?"

"It was the lyrics:

Light up, light up

As if you have a choice,

Even if you cannot hear my voice,

I am beside you, dear..."

Sherlock lay down beside John and wrapped an arm around him protectively. John sank into him and sighed. It was still unreal that he was Sherlocks boyfriend. Even if nobody knew it yet. This man, this amazing, genius man, was his. Sherlocks voice was soft when he spoke.

"That's true, though. If something happens to me, which it could, considering I piss off almost everyone, then I do want you to carry on. Find someone else, move on, be happy. Just.. don't forget me, alright?"

"Are you serious? Forget you? Never. You'll always be the man who stole my heart, Sherlock. And nobody, absolutely nobody can ever replace you. So if you die, then I won't just 'move on'. Because there's not a person on this earth who can make me a fraction as happy as you make me."

Sherlocks arm tightened around John. He knew he was lucky to have him. Not many people could manage Sherlock as well as him.

"I love you, John."

"I love you, too Sherlock. Always and forever."

"Always and forever..." Sherlock whispered.

And as they said it, both men knew it was true.