As they left the Warleggan's at dawn, the footman handed Demelza a note. She had no idea who it might be from and opens it quickly to read it. She stared at the words, neatly written in a curvaceous hand, and stuffed it into her reticule. Ross appeared next to her, offering an arm into the carriage. He looked disheveled, tired and frustrated. Considering the night they had, it was to be expected, so Demelza decided to keep this latest bit of unpleasantness to herself. No need to involve him in something that was merely another attempt to undermine what they had.
During the carriage ride home, Demelza thought back over the evening and replayed any and all events that might have led to the note in her bag. Her dress was new but nothing more than others wore. She made sure that her hair and face were within the style of the day and not over done as she knew Ross wouldn't have liked that. She danced with gentlemen who were neighbors as she found out, such as Hugh Bodrugan and those she had met before, like John Treneglos. At no time did she let any of them take advantage by letting them paw or manhandle her.
She wondered now if her entering the gaming room while Ross playing cards was against decorum. She had seen other women in there, namely one called Margaret, whom she had heard whispered about in the ballroom. Were wives not allowed to accompany their husbands into such places? But Demelza knew Ross needed her and if she had not gone in when she did, who knows if they still would have owned the mine, had he gambled away those shares instead of the necklace he had gifted her with.
It all ran over and over again in her head to where she just wanted to close her eyes and sleep. Perhaps they never should have gone. Ross was in no state to behave like a country squire and try as she might she would never be accepted as his wife. That was now clear. For even though Verity and to an extent, Francis and Elizabeth, had welcomed her into the family, everyone else of Ross' peers and class would not. She would always be what the note said.
Pulling up to Nampara, they made their goodbyes to the rest of the party and headed inside. All Demelza wanted to do was get out of this finery, into her day dress and see Julia. She had missed her terribly and after the events of last night and this morning, needed to hold her. Julia was her shining light and one thing she was most proud of. She would make sure that no one ever called her those things in the note or even let her hear a whisper of what people said about her mother. Running up the stairs, she hastily dropped her bag on the nearby table, not noticing the slip of paper fall to the ground.
Ross was behind her and reached down to pick it up. He opened it not thinking that is was anything Demelza wouldn't want him to see. He read it once, twice and on the third time, the words jumping out at him, making him see red; slut, trull, scullery wench. Hateful words that he knew had to wound her to her core. He was tempted to crush it in his fist, and throw it in the nearest fire. But he needed to talk to her about it first. He now realized that her silence on the way home was not because she was tired or even mad at him. It was because people he thought were his friends, lashed out, for whatever reason, to hurt and demean her. Perhaps if he were more attentive, showing all these well to do snobs that he was proud to have her as his wife and on his arm, this would never have found its way to her. If he ever found out who did this, they would have him to answer to. Male or female, it didn't matter. What mattered was the woman upstairs and how she must be feeling. The ironic thing is that he, because of his pompous behavior and incessant drinking, never once told her how beautiful she looked or how proud he was of her. The words on this parchment were just that; words of cowards who would not say these things to his face. They were those who were envious that he had found the perfect wife for himself from outside their narrow minded circle. He could imagine how tongues wagged at her entrance and how they kept on doing so as the night wore on and he was nowhere to be found. In a way he had treated her like the type of person they mentioned in that note and for that he was sorry.
Shoving the paper in his pocket, he headed upstairs to find Demelza and right things. Opening the door to their room he found her by the fire, in her work dress, with the bodice undone, feeding Julia. Hearing him come in, she lifted her head and smiled, her eyes seeming to be moist with unshed tears. Walking over to her, he crouched down next to the chair and placed a kiss on Julia's head and then reaching up, placed another, more intense one on his wife's lips. Surprised, she looked at him with a questioning gaze.
"Is everything alright?" she asked quietly.
"Fine my love, except…." Ross hesitated but did not want this issue clouding their lives and so pulled out the paper and held it in front of her.
"Ross, where did you get that?" her voice was shaky as she tried to speak softly so as not to disturb Julia,
"It fell out of your bag. Demelza, why didn't you tell me about this?"
"Ross there's nothing to tell. I've forgotten it." She moved to shift Julia to her shoulder for a burp, pulling her shift to cover her breast. Ross marveled at how she did this effortlessly without upsetting their daughter.
"Demelza, this note is vile and beyond hurtful. Tell me, who gave it to you?" He was trying to control his temper as the more he thought of what it said, the angrier he got. It just added to his distaste for those he had to associate with because of class and circumstance. If he could, he'd stay here at Nampara with Demelza and Julia and take up the life of a country farmer. Maybe then people would leave them alone and not judge.
"A footman at George's as we were leaving. I only glanced at it not wanting to upset you."
"Upset me? You're right it would upset me but only because of they hurt it caused you. My love, you have to know that anything that is said against you and our marriage, concerns both of us. I know you Demelza. You would have buried this in your mind, trying not to think of it again. Putting on a brave face if we met these people at some function in the future but always wondering who felt this way."
She looked at him and knew he was right. How did this man know her so well? She supposed it was the same way she knew him. From deep within their souls as the unseen bond and connection they had transcended anything people could write on paper. Standing slowly, she moved past Ross to put Julia in her cradle. Once she was settled, Demelza turned around and walked back to where he was perched near the fire.
"Ross, we cannot let things like this tarnish what we have. You're right that it hurt me more than I thought it would and I was unsure how to handle it. The whole ride home I kept asking myself if I had done something to prompt such hate and could think of nothing. So I thought that whoever wrote this just wanted to try and rattle me, which they did. And might still have. Until I came up here and saw Julia and I knew that whatever other people said, the only things that matter are Julia and you. As long as you both accept me for where I came from and who I am, the rest can go rot."
Ross watched her as she spoke, her voice clear and strong and the love he felt for this woman grew even more in those few moments. Pulling her into his embrace, he kissed her with all that he had and she accepted it. He still knew he needed to apologize for contributing to this less than stellar night.
"Demelza, I love you and what you said is truly all that matters. But I want to apologize for being a fairly lousy husband tonight. I should have stay by your side, being the escort you deserved instead of letting my anger at those men for Jim's death clouds your entry into society. Can you forgive me?"
Moving her hand up to touch his cheek, tracing the scar she'd come to love, she smiled at him.
"Oh Ross, there is nothing to forgive. I know why you did what you did and perhaps the mistake was in our going at all. But you did it to protect me and Julia because you knew you had to play the game to avoid further incident. It's fine my love. It's over, we're here, Julia's sleeping and we still have a few hours before we have to start the day."
Taking his hand, she led him to the bed, her smile turning from warm to coquettish. Picking up on her meaning, Ross started to undo his waistcoat when the note again came into view. Stopping her movements, Demelza took it from him and threw it in the fire.
"There. Let's not talk of this again. I am so proud to be your wife. I cannot help it if others are prone to jealousy." Her demeanor changed from dutiful wife to siren in an instant, her face beaming with love. Ross grinned at this version of Demelza as he took her to their bed. The harpies that had strived to damage their marriage forgotten now and forever for good intentions, given in anonymity is really cowardice is disguise.