The Legend Of Zelda: Idiots of Hyrule
Chapter I: The Village Idiot
Hello!! It's me, TombZelda02, aka, Tomby, and I have another fic for all the world to see. It is a comedy, and uh..i am still working on my other fic: The Legend Of Zelda: The Battle of The Ages, I just needed to make a comedy for the sake of it.
Anyway I hope you like this story, and uh.it is random. And it will be in Script Style.
The story begins in Kakariko Village.
OH, and uh.Link is walking up to Impa's house.
Link-::knocks on the door ever-so loudly:: IMPA!!-
Impa-::Answers door, with a bathing cap on:: Huh.what? ::looks down:: Oh, Link,.. ::pause for effect::
Random people-GET ON WITH IT.-
More Random people-YEAH, GET ON WITH IT!! ::Starts throwing rocks at me::
Link-o.0?? We're talking-
Tomby-Yes, yes-
Impa-What do ya' want?-
Saria walks into the "scene"
Saria-I was just in the, aw what the hell, I need some sugar-
Impa-Well so much for manners-
Saria-Yeah, well, I need it now-
Link-Hey Saria-
Saria-:: -.- :: You again, didn't you get the message when we left all that disturbing email on your computer?-
Impa-I don't need this- ::walks into her house::
Link-Impa, wait..aww, now look was ya' did, Saria-
Door opens, and a bagy thingy of sugar is thrown at Saria's face.
Saria-Its hard enough to keep my body like this, ::turns to link:: Now im gonna have to get hylian surgery again!-
Monkey from Zelda 2 appears
Saria-::looks down at the monkey:: Okay, what the hell is a monkey doing in Kakariko Village?
Link-Well whats a three hundred-year-old-girl-but-looks-like-a-little-girl doing in this story?-
Saria-They had no one else, besides, ive been in the business longer, baby. ::she blinks concededly::
Link-All I wanted was to ask Impa for a couple of pounds of ground beef, and a chain saw, but little miss green haired retard showed up.
Guy (lets call him bob) from the tower looking thingy-Im on top of the world!-
Link pulls out his arrows and bow and shoots the guy. The guy dies
Nabooru-awwwwwwwwwww
Link-_
Impa walks out of her house again, but this time with a towel around her waist.
Zelda shows up in a blue outfit.
Zelda-^_^ Hows everyone doing?-
Impa-OH god, now her? Look I already dealt with you, please leave me alone.
Nabooru-What the hell is wrong with you?-
Link walks into Imp'a house and sits on her bed.
After about an hour of sitting there without blinking, our little hero decides to take a walk around the kakariko Village.
Mikau appears in front of him, while Link is trying to get a rupee from a crow.
Mikau-Link, urgent news, you're a dumbass-
Link-OMG, that sounds serious, we better take him to the E.R.-
Mikau-E.R??? o.0 What is this E.R??-
Link stares into nothing, then blinks NOT simultaneously-Uh..a place that people get fixed at, and uh..a place in the distant future..::another pause for effect::
Mikau-Hold on..::gets out a needle:: Does that mean that I get to poke you?-
Just at that second, nothing happened, we will keep you notified if anything does, and while we wait, you can listen to one of our "wait-for- the-story-to-go-on-music" And it happens to be one of Link's favorite.
Link-oo. ABC'S AND THE ROGERS, ROGEY!!! ROCK ON!!
Music:A, b, c, d, e, f, g, lets go out and free a bee!! ROCK ON!!
Link-::@_@ ooh.. My favorite!!-
Music-And when the daily lamas appear!! And the goats, and the monkeys, and the horses, and the ..
Link-My other favorite part!!-
Music-::skip, plays backwards::
Link-Funny Ive never heard this part before-
Music-YOU SHALL DIE SOMETIME, AND WHEN YOU DO, THE WORLD WILL END-EN-END! AND EVEN THOUGH YOU THINK YOUR SPECIAL, YOUR NOTHING BUT A LIE!!! OH YEAH, ROGEY, I THINK IM GONNA DIE!!
Link-.....-
Mikau-Me neither, good thingy that it was so funny-
Link-They lied to me? BASTARDS THEY LIED TO ME!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-
Link becomes a dongogo and starts chewing up the place.
Mikau-He never ceases to amaze me-
Mikau walks away and disappears because the studio people are really cheap and cant record him that long.
After about five hours of Dongogo chewing, Link turns back into his stupid self.
A day passed and Link didn't do anything. Literally, he just sat in Impa's bed, just looking out into nothing, he didn't even blink, creepy I know.
Impa was bored of watching her pot on her stove to see if the water would boil.
Impa-I guess the rumors were true, wow that changes life in Hyrule as we know it.- Ten minutes later she was back watching the pot and hoping it would boil. It turns out she didn't even have the stove on.
Saria walks into Impa's house-DIE, DIE FOR THE SUGAR WAS BROWN SUGAR!! MUHAHAHAHAH::puff:: ::puff:: AHEM!! MUHAHAHAHA!!
End Of Chapter-----------------------
Well I hoped you liked it, it may not be funny until the SECOND time you read it, or if you are high, but don't worry I wasn't high when I wrote this, and I don't get high, I have too much to do to do stupid things. Next Chapter: Chapter II Saria: Is it brown because of dirt, or is it brown because of...?
~Tomby
Chapter I: The Village Idiot
Hello!! It's me, TombZelda02, aka, Tomby, and I have another fic for all the world to see. It is a comedy, and uh..i am still working on my other fic: The Legend Of Zelda: The Battle of The Ages, I just needed to make a comedy for the sake of it.
Anyway I hope you like this story, and uh.it is random. And it will be in Script Style.
The story begins in Kakariko Village.
OH, and uh.Link is walking up to Impa's house.
Link-::knocks on the door ever-so loudly:: IMPA!!-
Impa-::Answers door, with a bathing cap on:: Huh.what? ::looks down:: Oh, Link,.. ::pause for effect::
Random people-GET ON WITH IT.-
More Random people-YEAH, GET ON WITH IT!! ::Starts throwing rocks at me::
Link-o.0?? We're talking-
Tomby-Yes, yes-
Impa-What do ya' want?-
Saria walks into the "scene"
Saria-I was just in the, aw what the hell, I need some sugar-
Impa-Well so much for manners-
Saria-Yeah, well, I need it now-
Link-Hey Saria-
Saria-:: -.- :: You again, didn't you get the message when we left all that disturbing email on your computer?-
Impa-I don't need this- ::walks into her house::
Link-Impa, wait..aww, now look was ya' did, Saria-
Door opens, and a bagy thingy of sugar is thrown at Saria's face.
Saria-Its hard enough to keep my body like this, ::turns to link:: Now im gonna have to get hylian surgery again!-
Monkey from Zelda 2 appears
Saria-::looks down at the monkey:: Okay, what the hell is a monkey doing in Kakariko Village?
Link-Well whats a three hundred-year-old-girl-but-looks-like-a-little-girl doing in this story?-
Saria-They had no one else, besides, ive been in the business longer, baby. ::she blinks concededly::
Link-All I wanted was to ask Impa for a couple of pounds of ground beef, and a chain saw, but little miss green haired retard showed up.
Guy (lets call him bob) from the tower looking thingy-Im on top of the world!-
Link pulls out his arrows and bow and shoots the guy. The guy dies
Nabooru-awwwwwwwwwww
Link-_
Impa walks out of her house again, but this time with a towel around her waist.
Zelda shows up in a blue outfit.
Zelda-^_^ Hows everyone doing?-
Impa-OH god, now her? Look I already dealt with you, please leave me alone.
Nabooru-What the hell is wrong with you?-
Link walks into Imp'a house and sits on her bed.
After about an hour of sitting there without blinking, our little hero decides to take a walk around the kakariko Village.
Mikau appears in front of him, while Link is trying to get a rupee from a crow.
Mikau-Link, urgent news, you're a dumbass-
Link-OMG, that sounds serious, we better take him to the E.R.-
Mikau-E.R??? o.0 What is this E.R??-
Link stares into nothing, then blinks NOT simultaneously-Uh..a place that people get fixed at, and uh..a place in the distant future..::another pause for effect::
Mikau-Hold on..::gets out a needle:: Does that mean that I get to poke you?-
Just at that second, nothing happened, we will keep you notified if anything does, and while we wait, you can listen to one of our "wait-for- the-story-to-go-on-music" And it happens to be one of Link's favorite.
Link-oo. ABC'S AND THE ROGERS, ROGEY!!! ROCK ON!!
Music:A, b, c, d, e, f, g, lets go out and free a bee!! ROCK ON!!
Link-::@_@ ooh.. My favorite!!-
Music-And when the daily lamas appear!! And the goats, and the monkeys, and the horses, and the ..
Link-My other favorite part!!-
Music-::skip, plays backwards::
Link-Funny Ive never heard this part before-
Music-YOU SHALL DIE SOMETIME, AND WHEN YOU DO, THE WORLD WILL END-EN-END! AND EVEN THOUGH YOU THINK YOUR SPECIAL, YOUR NOTHING BUT A LIE!!! OH YEAH, ROGEY, I THINK IM GONNA DIE!!
Link-.....-
Mikau-Me neither, good thingy that it was so funny-
Link-They lied to me? BASTARDS THEY LIED TO ME!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-
Link becomes a dongogo and starts chewing up the place.
Mikau-He never ceases to amaze me-
Mikau walks away and disappears because the studio people are really cheap and cant record him that long.
After about five hours of Dongogo chewing, Link turns back into his stupid self.
A day passed and Link didn't do anything. Literally, he just sat in Impa's bed, just looking out into nothing, he didn't even blink, creepy I know.
Impa was bored of watching her pot on her stove to see if the water would boil.
Impa-I guess the rumors were true, wow that changes life in Hyrule as we know it.- Ten minutes later she was back watching the pot and hoping it would boil. It turns out she didn't even have the stove on.
Saria walks into Impa's house-DIE, DIE FOR THE SUGAR WAS BROWN SUGAR!! MUHAHAHAHAH::puff:: ::puff:: AHEM!! MUHAHAHAHA!!
End Of Chapter-----------------------
Well I hoped you liked it, it may not be funny until the SECOND time you read it, or if you are high, but don't worry I wasn't high when I wrote this, and I don't get high, I have too much to do to do stupid things. Next Chapter: Chapter II Saria: Is it brown because of dirt, or is it brown because of...?
~Tomby