Author's note: Hey guys! I know I'm suppose to be working on my other story, but this one had to be written. I just moved to college today! I also started one of my classes. I just had a lot of thoughts and emotions going through my head, and so I wanted to transfer them into a story of my two favorite brothers. I watch the tv show, you know, and see Sam at college, and I'm all like, "Oh, that's nice. I can't wait until I go to college!" Now that I'm finally here, I can put Sam's situation in another light. It's an amazing perception that I wouldn't have gained if I hadn't gone to college. So enough about the cause of this little creation, on with the effect!
Disclaimer: I do not own Sam or Dean or John Winchester
He had tried to memorize every feature of their little family. Anything that would keep him connected. The sleek black of the impala and the smell of its leather interior. Its purr and roar as it sped up or slowed down and how it just seemed to always put him to sleep. The long hours spent in that vehicle made it more of a home than any other place had been.
His father's face seemed to be etched in a permanent scowl. Throughout the years it was interrupted by an occasional smile or laugh. He had a scraggly shadow of a beard. He remembered the arms that would envelope him as a frightened child. Later replaced by distance and looks of disappointment. His father was steady as a rock and was never frightened, or at least, he never showed it. There was an awesome power that surrounded him and allowed him to take control of any situation. Except for, maybe, the most recent one.
Then there was his big brother. The one that might as well have been his father too. Everything began and ended with his brother. He was always there to comfort him whenever he had nightmares, or something went wrong at school. He made everything right in the end. He was the one to keep him company. He was the one that did everything to satisfy his little brother's needs. Most importantly, he was the one that protected him. Against the creatures of the night or just against bullies at school.
He was going to miss his big brother the most.
He was going to miss the smell and creaking of his brother's leather jacket. His swagger as he headed over to a fine looking specimen across the bar. Yes, even his bad, disgusting manners. The cocky expression spread across his face; the eyebrow raising that was irritating most of the time. The presence of his being that had always been there with his little brother. Yes, he was missing his big brother so much already.
The buss ride had been long and boring, giving plenty of time for analysis. Sam sighed and leaned his head against the window. It was a dream come true, and yet his worst nightmare all wrapped up in a messy package. This wasn't what he had wanted, not in the least.
When he had told his father that he was going to college, of course he had expected him to freak out at first. Sam had planned on keeping his cool and let the storm subside. But then the unexpected had happened. Well, not really unexpected, but it had hurt still. Dean had sided with their father. He did not want Sam to go and thought it was the stupidest idea of the millennium. Then Sam snapped. He didn't understand why they didn't get it. It was just college! He wasn't quitting or anything. Hell, he would probably hunt on the side or something.
It was then that the storms clashed and clashed some more. On would not bow down to the other. And so the ultimatum was issued. It was unexpected. Sam didn't think his father would go so far as to banish him from the family's existence. But he did. Sam was now cut off from the two people he loved the most. He was alone. Alone in a world he did not completely understand.
Sam felt like he was being tortured. He still wanted to keep in contact. He had wanted to see them during the holidays. Hear Dean's voice over the phone; have the comfort that Dean backed him up one hundred percent. But he didn't, and Sam's family did not want to see him, hear him, or be reminded of him.
The tall teenager shifted in the uncomfortable seat. That was fine with him, he tried to convince himself. He could handle this all on his own. He didn't need any support or comfort. He could take care of himself. He didn't need –
The bus slowed jerkily to a stop, Sam looked up. There it was: Stanford. One of the top schools in the west. A new beginning. Sam stood up and grabbed his duffel bag, shuffling through the isle and out of the bus. He stood there a long time after the bus pulled away. Now what did he do? He looked around at his surroundings for a while. After some time Sam pulled out a piece of paper from his pocket. It had the address for his apartment on it. Sighing again he headed out for his place.
The apartment was close to campus and so it was found quite quickly. Checking in with the manager and getting the key, Sam looked around his new apartment. His new home. Sam shook his head at the foreign idea and dumped his stuff next to the bed. His roommate would be getting there in a day or so. In the meantime, Sam would have to familiarize himself with the place. It just felt so surreal. It was like he was in a foreign country. Just dropped off and expected to thrive in a strange land.
And suddenly a tiny spark of fear ignited inside of him. He was actually alone. A tiny pinprick in the world. Sam looked around the room despairingly. He had an overwhelming urge to call Dean. Just to tell him that he had made it safely to Paso Alto. As soon as the idea came, Sam quickly banished it. Dean didn't want to talk to him; he was pissed at what Sam had done. Tearing the family up like that. Besides, Sam was forbidden to talk to Dean.
Sam started to unpack. He didn't have much. Groaning, he also remembered that he needed to go grocery shopping. Yeah, this kind of sucked. As Sam grabbed the last of his clothes his fingers grazed across something smooth. Curious, he reached in and brought it out. It was a picture. A picture of Dean and himself in some crappy hotel. It looked like they had just finished wrestling. Their clothes were disheveled and their hair was sticking up at odd angles. Both had big grins. The image became blurry.
Sam put his head in his hands. Some tears started to fall. He – he just needed something. Some reassurance that the universe wasn't completely against him. He needed his brother to tell him that it was all a big joke and that he was coming up to check out the college babes right now. He needed Dean on his side, by his side. Rooting for him when there was no one else. And at the moment . . . there was no one else. Sam couldn't believe it, but he was homesick.
His cell phone started ringing. Sam jerked away, caught off guard. He wiped his eyes and shakily picked his phone up. Flipping it open he looked to see who it was. The person's name was right there in four little letters. Dean. Sam's eyes grew big and something gripped his heart. He wanted so badly to answer, but his father's warnings filtered through his mind. He stalled, and the still the cell kept on ringing.
Finally Sam moved a clumsy finger to the little green button.
"Hello?"
"Sam! Sammy. I was starting to think that you were just going to ignore my call."
"Dean? Is that you?"
"Of course it's me, who else has this drop dead voice?"
Sam ran a hand over his face, "Why are you calling? If dad catches you he'll break your phone and then make you do research for your next hunt."
"Ha ha Sammy. I guess it's a good thing dad is out investigating some crap then isn't it? Why you all defensive anyways?"
"I thought you and dad agreed that I was to be," Sam swallowed, "cut off from the family completely."
"What! Dad may have said that, but I never signed a document that banned me from my talking privileges."
"Oh . . . okay" Sam sighed, a small smile appearing, "So why are you calling again?"
There was a huff. "Can't I just check in with my little brother to see if he made it to his dream life without causing serious injury to himself and others around him?"
Sam's heart swelled. "Oh, well in that case . . ."
Dean laughed, "So really, you made it okay? No problems or anything?"
"Yeah. The bus ride was long and boring, but now I'm just here unpacking and stuff."
"Oh yeah, that sounds really exciting, I think I'll drop everything and come join you, college boy."
"Dean, seriously . . ."
"Okay, okay. I gotta go now, but Sammy, take care of yourself."
Sam looked around his room, "Yeah, I will."
"I just want you to know, Sam . . . I'm proud of you, and glade that you're out there living your dream."
Moisture bombarded Sam's eyes, he nodded, "Thanks Dean." You have no idea what that means to me.
"Now don't do anything stupid, or else I'll have to come up there and kick your ass."
Sam laughed, "Dean, please . . ."
"Alright, alright. I'll see you around kiddo."
With that the other line broke its connection. Sam sat there for a long time. Basking in the presence of his older brother. The dark clouds that seemed to threaten and overwhelm him didn't seem so oppressive. His brother still loved him. He supported Sam one hundred percent. Dean would always be there for him.
And suddenly, life looked a lot more bearable.
What did you think? I want to hear your thoughts about this. Also, I would like to know if I portray Sam and Dean appropriately or if they are totally out of character. -Ms. Severus Kenobi
