There was nothing that Fili enjoyed more than a wild party. He enjoyed the thrill of watching women dance, drinking mead (he preferred the cheap, potent sort), telling jokes, and doing certain things that almost always happened after a long night of drinking provided his princely obligations did not nag too much at his conscience. Any other night he would have been more than happy to participate in the festivities that raged with excitement and passion below him. But, as it was, he was suffering from a poisonous ailment and this above all notions of princely obligations is what caused him to retreat into the dark confines of his chamber with the excuse that he was feeling rather feverish.
Now he lay naked beneath his covers, tossing angrily. The lamplight was too bright, he was burning hot and freezing cold at the same time, and the way that the itchy fabric rubbed against his sweaty skin was rather irritating. He sighed. Truly, he was plagued by the most persistent and torturous sickness of them all: lovesickness with a dash of jealousy mixed with spite.
He was sick of the love that he felt for the one man in the world that he was not allowed to have, sick of the almost predatory love that he could not quench. To add to his torment he was jealous of the bright-eyed, cheekboned woman who possessed his love's affections and this, in turn, made him spiteful towards her though this feeling had been carefully hidden behind a mask of polite curiosity and cordiality.
Sleep lurked somewhere in the darkness of the chamber but, like a suspicious beast, it refused to come anywhere near him, forcing him to dwell upon memories that made him sigh and run his overly large hands through his hair in a very agitated sort of way. However, he would have much preferred to lie in such a state for the rest of his life than face the person who suddenly shoved into his room.
"Blunt the spoons, spin the porks….smash the bottles and eat their corks," Kili stumbled semi-drunkenly to one of the suspended lamps and relit it along with a few antique censers with shaking fingers. Fili groaned loudly and implicitly at the sound of the roaring music spilling through his door and the way that Kili, still singing merrily, swung the lamplight his way. He stood up abruptly, wrapped a cover around his waist, and pushed the heavy doors shut.
"Don't do that," he muttered, using one hand to shield his eyes from the low light while the other held the cover clumsily to his exposed thighs.
"Aw, come on," Kili growled. He jumped on the pile of cushions only seconds after Fili had gotten in. He placed a hand on his brother's shoulder and began to shake him. "Don't be so boring. You don't want to miss this one, I'll tell you that. It is the singularly most exciting celebration that I have ever been to."
"Yeah, well. I don't feel very well. I think I have a fever." Fili coughed none-too-convincingly, fully aware of his brother's tendencies to exaggerate. The feeling of the younger dwarf's body pressed so ignorantly close to his own and the way in which Kili insisted on speaking directly into his ear excited him in a way that was hard to ignore.
"That's why you've got to join us in the festivities," Kili climbed bodily over his brother (Fili huffed in pain) and lay so that he was facing him, his eyes bright and grin mischievous as ever. "It will make you feel well again. And if you're really not feeling it – get drunk! It's what I do!" Fili gave him a look.
"Are you saying that I should take advice from you, little brother?"
"How else have you managed to stay so sane?"
Fili shook his head and shifted his position but once again Kili, surprisingly nimble in his intoxicated state, climbed right over him. By this time the covers had fallen away from his body save for the ends that remained twisted around his ankles but neither dwarf was concerned with the contrast between his naked body and Kili's fully clothed own. They had seen each other naked many times throughout the years under many different circumstances.
"Well," Kili said with a lift of his eyebrows. He reached over the side of the cushions and brought up a clumsily wrapped bundle that Fili hadn't seen him carry in. Inside of it was a few blocks of cheese, ham, grapes, and cakes that had obviously been taken from the party. "If my brother won't celebrate the reclaiming of our homeland than neither will I. Here's to the destruction of the beast!" He raised a ham-covered grape good naturedly. Fili sat up and fixed his brother with a disbelieving look.
"You don't have to do this," he said in a grave tone.
"You didn't have to stay with me when I was injured back in Lake-Town, no, not at all," Kili pointed out. He placed the grape between his smiling lips and licked his thumb. "But you did. And I can never thank you enough for that."
"That was different. You don't have to pay me back!" Fili said. Kili popped another grape in his mouth while Fili desperately searched for a reason to make him reconsider. "Besides….you have a lady waiting downstairs!"
Kili stopped chewing. For a moment an image of the beautiful elf maiden with fiery hair and dangerous eyes flashed across both their minds. Though the dwarves hated elves something about her and her charm had eased the age-old hatred that they harbored and she had been allowed into the stone halls 'just this one time, lassie." Once there she had danced and laughed with the rest, like a silver star whose light shined upon those that surrounded her and made them feel radiant in turn. Fili had seen him dancing with her. Oh yes, he had watched his brother look up into her eyes filled with more bliss and inspiration than any man – be it elf, human, or dwarf – could bear.
"She will understand," Kili said dreamily. "Besides, she promised that we'd make a little starlight of our own out in the woods later on tonight. Oh, Fili, to see her dance is to watch all of your most soothing dreams-" but that was as far as he got for Fili had smacked the bundle from his hand, accidentally hitting him in the nose in the process. For a minute Fili simply gazed at the blood that dripped from Kili's nose with a mixture of surprise and hatred before muttering a meaningless apology and stumbling out of bed.
"What was that for?!" Kili cried out in pain, his fingers covered in blood. Fili ran his hands through his hair.
"How dare you talk about her like that in front of me? How dare you!" Kili stared in horror at the uncannily Thorin-esque rage that had taken over his brother's being. "After all that we have done together?!"
"Done together? Fili, lower your voice! Please!" Kili hopped off of the cushions and stumbled towards his brother but suddenly stopped when he realized just what Fili was talking about. His hands dropped to his sides and his eyes darkened. "Fili," he said slowly, "that was nothing. Did you honestly think-"
"That it meant something? Of course I did! Sneaking away every other night of the quest, watching the stars swelter in the midnight heat, the heat that we made-"
"Shh, shut up…" Kili placed a finger on his brother's lips and glanced warily at the door. "That meant nothing for me. I…you…we were desperate, remember? That's what we agreed at first. We hadn't been with a woman in ages…except for the human that we shared in the tavern…"
"And what about the times before that?" Fili's voice was sharp and precise like the arrows that they had both learned to shoot as young boys. Kili lowered his eyes momentarily before looking back up at his brother with a blank expression that told all and broke Fili's heart. How had he fallen into loving such a heart breaking face? Why couldn't he help wanting to run his fingers along the lips that traced such a grim frown?
He pushed past his brother and deeper into the room. Already the smoke from the censers had perfumed the air with a woody, disorienting sent that hung about the ceiling like a curling storm. The fire from the lamps played upon these greyish clouds, giving the whole setting the appearance of a raging lightning storm, the perfect weather to match Fili's mood.
"It was nothing?" he asked the cushions below him with a small, mirthless laugh.
"I'm sorry." Kili mumbled awkwardly. He heard his brother come up behind him.
"Then you wouldn't mind doing it again!" Suddenly he spun around and pulled his brother into a violent, desperate kiss. Kili's eyes widened as his brother's hands dug into the fabric of his clothing but, seeing as Fili was already naked, the most that Kili could do was grab at his shoulders and try to push him away. Fili pulled back with his mouth open around a trembling gasp as he felt roughly at his brother's crotch, his lips tracing a smile when Kili, enraged with blood and spit glistening on his stubbled chin, put his hands on his neck and finally managed to pry him away.
"Mahal!" He cried in his humiliation at having been handled in such a way. His hands balled at his sides as he stared his brother down in his unexpectedly predatory way, not for the first time in their life. "This must be some sort of joke, brother."
"Like my love for you was a joke," Fili spat back. Slowly, he began to take small steps towards his brother, their eyes never leaving each other's. When he was close enough to feel Kili's breath – warm and pungent with alcohol – wash over his lips he began to unbutton the other man's shirt, communicating his determination with unblinking eyes and parted lips. Kili shoved him once again and cursed his name but soon enough resigned to mumbled threats and heavy breaths as Fili bit and kissed at his neck, their hips grinding desperately together of their own accord. His shirt fluttered to the floor followed by his belt, trousers, and boots and these were forgotten as the two brother's attacked each other with hateful, animalistic lust. Fili seized a fistful of Kili's hair and yanked back as he sucked at the younger man's nipples, making him pant in pain and pleasure.
"Fili," he whispered, his hands roaming his brother's heaving back, his neck, and finally his hair as his brother tasted every inch of his tense belly until his mouth found its way to Kili's already turgid cock. Without hesitation he licked along his whole length before biting at the leaking tip (Kili jumped and muttered an oath) and then taking the rest in his mouth. Already a hot and powerful sensation was building up in his stomach as he watched his brother's head bob against his thighs. He knew this specific feeling. He had paced in anticipation for it many a-nights when Fili had decided that he would taunt him by making him wait. All too soon when his cock was red, wet, and almost painfully hard he let his brother turn him around and push him to his knees. He winced against the cold stone floor as his brother's tongue circled his entrance, followed by mercilessly confident fingers and the loveless bites placed along his ass.
"She'll make you see starlight?" Fili asked in a husky voice. Kili closed his eyes, bit his thumb and moaned as more fingers were pushed into his body, only to be scissored, pulled out, and then pushed in again at a rapid pace. "Brother, I gave you the stars in the sky! I've been pulling them out of the sky for you ever since you were born!" Fili momentarily rested his head on his brother's back, punching it lightly before kissing the spot with adoration and regret. "Or do you not remember?"
Kili opened his eyes and stared at nothing in particular, sweat dripping down his nose and mingling with the dried blood that had gathered there. He could feel the vibrations from the various drums and horns snaking through his body but all he wanted to feel was the vibrations that only his brother could give him.
"I remember," was all that he said.
Suddenly Fili pulled him up. Kili didn't even bother asking what his brother had planned, so heated and confused was he, and simply kissed his brother's lips. Fili pulled him to the cushions and pressed him down against the soft fabric amongst the haze of smoke and amidst the flickering glare. But that was as gentle as Fili planned on getting for, driven by nostalgic desperation and lust, he guided his full length into his brother, his arousal spurred by the way in which his brother's body quivered around his cock and the anguished whimpering and hisses that slid from between Kili's clenched teeth. He was slightly embarrassed by his clumsiness at first but after a while forgot all about the unevenness of his deep and relentless thrusts and submitted to the bliss and pleasure of being inside of his brother once again.
Sometime during it all his hand found its way to Kili's and their fingers intertwined in a painful, reddening grasp that grew tighter as first Kili and then Fili, edged on by the shuddering convulsions of his brother, came with unabashedly loud cries of satisfaction. For a minute Fili remained as he was, still buried deep inside of Kili, and stared down at the strong back slippery with sweat. He bent down and placed a thousand kisses upon that back before slowly pulling out with a final sigh that matched Kili's own. The two didn't speak, they barely even shared a glance or made a move to clean up the sticky mess on Kili's stomach. They simply lay down next to each other, each resigned to their own emotions, and let the muffled music beneath them lull them to sleep.