I walked through the manor. The place was as beautiful as ever, but the true horror of the manor could be seen on the servants and guards faces as I strolled past them. That is when I started to notice the scratches and destruction on the walls and furniture. What had Tamlin done here when I was gone? Does he scare his people as much they should be terrified of me? Tamlin was off to find Ianthe, but he made sure that I was walking to my room accompanied by Lucien and four other guards.

We all stopped at my door. "I think I can take it from here boys, thank you for walking me." A dismissal followed by a small, dainty smile. Broken. I have to act broken, but in control so that I am able to be a part of things here. Let's hope my acting skills are up to par. I need to be alone to figure out what to do next. What to do about Azriel and Cassian, I need to get them my blood. Also, I need to apologize to Rhysand for putting him through that pain. Rhysand. If Tamlin went crazy when we were apart what will Rhysand do? He once told he that too much love can be a poison. Will our love be poisonous to him? Or does he know how to handle the love before him properly? So much to think about. I entered the room and went to the close the door behind me.

"We need to talk." Lucien said and stalked into my room and then slammed to door. "You are a terrible actress," Damn and I was really hoping the opposite. "Tamlin is too in love to not notice or want to see anything different from that little performance you put on." His voice was a killing calm. The walls were thick enough that we didn't have to worry about being overheard, unless we start shouting, which I'm not so sure won't happen.

I backed away trying to keep up with the innocent façade, "Lucien, I haven't been acting."

"Like hell you haven't. How is it that when I saw you in the woods you pretended to be full of hatred, but at Hybern you are able to care again? Explain that." He was losing his calmness.

"I was freed" I replied tentatively.

"Even before you were freed. You felt for Tamlin; you apologized to him. Why would you do that if you were under Rhysand's control that entire time." I tried to hold back the sneer that came to my lips as Lucien said my mates name with such disgust. "Also, you were crying out and begging for your sisters, my mate, when you were still under his supposive spell. How do you explain that?"

I didn't have a response. I fumbled for one. I couldn't believe how much Lucien saw. "I wasn't completely under his control; I was still me with his new parts of me layered on top. That's how I eventually broke free. Because it was still me underneath." That last part came to me right on the spot.

Lucien walked over and sat on the edge of my bed. Normally if it was Cassian or Mor that did that I would give them a crude comment like, sure, help yourself to my bed, or yes of course you can sit there. I wouldn't mean it, not the way I would mean it in this situation. But, none of those words left my mouth because I am no longer sarcastic, fun Feyre, but rather, scared, broken Feyre. I leaned against my armour.

Lucien seemed defeated as he said, "I don't want to fight you. I just want my mate back, maybe even as much as you do. I will do anything to be with your sister again. I will not let this turn into the same instance as my other love. I just want to know she is okay, especially after what Jurian implied." His face grew somber after speaking those last few words.

Shit. I have to tell him. Tell him what though? She is fine and living in this beautiful city that I spent my entire time away in. And yes I do still love my mate that you want to kill. Well, he probably already knows about Velaris because of the mortal queens. But what if he betrays me like they did. Although, he did try to help me before I left. But, he did end up siding with Tamlin and didn't stick up for me. Would it be different this time because me, his friend, and my sister, his mate, are on the line? There are just too many possibilities to consider here. If only I could ask Rhysand what he thinks. No, I don't have to ask him because he would say trust yourself. He sent me into the weaver's cabin to find the ring myself, he thinks I can make the proper decisions for us all.

I lifted my eyes to meet his. His eyes were focused on me. He has been watching this war going on in my head.

"Lucien-"

Knocks came quietly on my bedroom door. Lucien eyed me again and then walked to the door. I knew who would be standing there even before the door opened.

"Feyre, I needed to ask- Lucien what are you doing in here?" Tamlin's voice altered at the end.

"I was making sure that Feyre here was alright. Did you find Ianthe?"

Tamlin was now staring at me, as if seeing himself that I was alright. A sneer was caught on my lips because I'd be a hell of a lot better if he went away again. Still, a small smile plagued my face.

"Um no she's gone." He turned to Lucien now, "although, apparently she fled the High priestesses too. Then sent a girl named Pilaria to apologize and take her place."

"Are you just going to let her stay here then? Even after Ianthe?" I asked feeling I already knew the answer.

"Well why wouldn't I? She's said that Ianthe was acting against the priestesses wishes."

"And you believe that?" Lucien asked with disbelief.

Tamlin wasn't in the mood for this conversation, "well of course I do. If I believed that she had anything to do with Ianthe then she would have been out of here in a second." He was done with the conversation completely now. "Lucien I can take it from here."

Lucien left mouthing, I'll be back. Great I have to deal with that again later. I looked at my current problem now. He was staring right back. Sorrow and was that lust that filled his eyes. His look made me long for Rhysand even more.

"I know it's late. I figured that you would want me here tonight-"

"Tamlin I don't think i'm ready to make love to you yet." I tried not to gag went I said make love. The thought of it was driving me crazy.

"And I wasn't thinking that you were," his facial expression said otherwise though. "I just figured that I could hold you when you slept."

"I am not sure that would be best." I didn't want him touching me.

"It would make me feel a hell of a lot better when I sleep if I know exactly where you are though." Of course because I am his possession something of his that he wants to keep tabs on.

I hated myself as I responded, "that would be fine then, I guess." I need to keep the idea that I still love him alive, or alive enough that he won't suspect a thing. I went and changed in my bathroom into my sleeping clothes, or should I say lack of clothes. The only things available for me to sleep in is clothing that Tamlin would like to see on me. When I got out of the bathroom I ran into the bed wanting Tamlin to see as little of me as possible. He cupped me into his belly and slung his arms around me. I knew that I would not be getting any sleep, just from his smell alone.

I tried so desperately to contact Rhysand through our bond. I even left my shields open for him. I could feel Rhysand there his presences, but I couldn't get a clear message through to him. I suppose that when our bargain bond was snapped our communication was damaged. Although it could be our distance, or all the wards that are put up against Rhys. It could be all of these things factored together. As Tamlin slept soundly, I drifted into a fitful sleep.

I am in a cage. More like shackles. Iron is clamped around my waist and long bars are intertwined with my legs. A block pushes down on my head just enough so I cannot move it. I lift my eyes and see the throne room from under the mountain. I am hanging from the wall where Clare was. I am unharmed though. I look down at the throne and see Tamlin standing next to Amarantha. His face holds no expression as it did the entire time I was completing challenges to win his freedom. In the spot where I was first forced to kneel was Rhysand.

Amarantha announced, "Let's give our guest our welcome." That's when the attor and the others pounced. They were on him in seconds and his blood sprayed everywhere. I was screaming, but no sound came out of my mouth. I was begging and pleading to the cauldron to stop this. That is when the king of Hybern and Jurian appeared with the cauldron.

The broken body of what was once Rhys was placed into the cauldron. I was spazzing now. Not again. Not again. He thrashed under the water. The pain that he was feeling felt like a physical blow to me. It tipped. Three bodies fell out instead of one. Nesta, Elain and Rhysand laid wet on the floor. All breathing. A breath I didn't know I was holding escaped my lips.

Amarantha smiled broadly at me. "For your final task you must kill each one of them. This should be fun for you." My stomach lurched. I puked onto the floor past my bonds.

"No I won't do it." My voice was shaking and weak. I can't kill them. Never. My bonds released. I fell to floor with a crunch. The iron had unbound itself everywhere on me except for the around my waste. It now was attached to a metal chain and was a leash attached to the wall.

"If you don't do it, the entire human population will be eliminated. Not a single human will be left free, but instead under heavy bonds of slavery or they will suffer brutal death. Your precious city Velaris will be wiped from the map. The land will be a barren wasteland. Your friends in summer will be engrossed in water and will be washed away. All of this will happen if you do not kill these three right now." Amarantha smile didn't falter for a second.

"I don't care let the world go to hell; I will not hurt them." My voice was stern this time.

"You can't let the humans die." Elain said sadly. "I will give my life for them."

"You better kill me first because I will kill whoever touches a hair on Elain's head." Nesta sneered out. It was obvious that she was just as willing to die, but she did not want to have to watch her beloved younger her sister die.

The next voice broke my heart even further, "You must do it for our family and Velaris."

I couldn't do it. Still an ash dagger was in my hand and Nesta just nodded as the knife came down. Without hesitation I was pulled in front of Elain she was smiling as tears ran down her face. Some force other than myself pushed the dagger into her chest. My heart breaking. The chain now placed me in front of Rhysand. My mind could not even keep up with what had just happened. Sobs were escaping from my body. I looked Rhysand in the eyes and said, "I can't do it."

"Yes you can, you must." The third knife started to follow the direction of the rest. I summoned all the willpower I could and turned the knife to my own chest pushing down. I hit the floor before Rhys could catch me.

I awoke. Tamlin was gone. I ran to the bathroom and threw up everything that was in my stomach. I suppose this means my nightmares are back. Kneeling before the toilet I thought of Rhysand kneeling before me. Rhysand. I tried calling for him, to have some comfort. That is when I realized my shields were down. Shit. They shot up rock hard as ever. Now I am hoping that he couldn't see in. I was praying he didn't see that dream.

Rhysand

I opened my eyes and fell the floor of my room. She would choose me over the entire world and herself. She would die for me. I can't stop shaking on the floor. Darkness was engulfing me. She left me mental shields wide open for me. Her mental shields are still wide open. I heard her pleas for me and I tried telling, screaming to her that I was there for her. Then they shot back up.

Mor came running into my room, "What?! What is it?!" Mor was frantic. I was shaking the house. This is why I never slept in the same place as my court after the under the mountain.

"Sorry, I just had a nightmare." I somewhat started to relax. "Well it was Feyre's nightmare. She left her mind completely open for me."

"Well if it was a nightmare why didn't you change it for her?" Mor asked making it sound ever so easy.

"I would have, but I can't talk to her." My face held a grim expression.

"What do you mean you can't talk to her?"