Subject: WHO SAID I NEEDED THERAPY?
Mood: PISSED. So angry that I doubt you'd want to see me.
Music: My suggestion is to keep your distance cuz right now I'm dangerous
Location: Didn't you see what I wrote before? I'm really angry. Don't even look for me.
Hmm…so this is a 'journal', then? Used for my thoughts and such, right?
Well, for all of you evil, conniving psychiatrists who probably are going to be reading this later—yeah, I know that you are going to end up reading this. Even if you claim that you won't, because "the patients can tell us their problems when they want to. This is just for your own thoughts."
Yeah right.
I totally believed you. For about a second. Then I saw your eyes glint and knew the plan.
But fine. If you want to play that game, I shall play with you. I'm not the head of our sports teams at school for nothing and I most certainly not have won all those awards in athletics because I don't know how to play a game.
Oh, and before you think I'm some jock, I'm also in the school newspaper. So this girl has brains and brawn (and beauty, but I don't really care about that department.
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Much, at least.)
(STUPID, FAKE, TOTAL LIES) Reasons why I am here:
1. I apparently am a very 'violent person who needs to learn to calm down'.
2. At least, this is according to the Pink-haired Menace—I mean, my friend Sakura.
3. AS IF SHE KNOWS ANYTHING.
4. I mean, she's a smart person and obviously should be listened to and—
5. SHE'S THE ONE WHO HITS NARUTO AND—
6. Anyways, I am not violent. At all. The book incident? That was an accident.
7. MAYBEKINDAOKITWASNOT.
8. It's not fully my fault it happened. I didn't know everything about the incident.
9. And, HOW WAS I TO KNOW THAT NEJI AND SAKURA WERE STUDYING?
10. They looked like they were doing something else.
11. ….well, it was a library, and there were books…and…
12. LOOKS CAN BE DECEIVING.
13. And, besides, I wasn't the only one thinking this!
14. SASUKE WAS TOTALLY HOLDING A KNIFE BEHIND THAT SHELF.
15. It just so happened that my—someone's—book ended up hitting Pink—Sakura first.
16. And because everyone started to think I was jealous—
17. WHICH I TOTALLY AM NOT. WHO WOULD BE JEALOUS?
18. –of Sakura and Neji being together in a totally non-romantic way—
19. I WAS JUST PROTECTING MY FRIENDS FROM MAKING A MISTAKE.
20. –and did something that caused slight injuries—
21. Honestly, it was just a dictionary. A 5000pg dictionary, but still just a dictionary.
22. –everyone decided to send me to this idiotic therapy place.
23. AND, I WAS NOT JEALOUS.
24. GOD. Neji is just a FRIEND. NOTHING MORE.
But, I'll admit, the view is nice here. All sorts of trees and hiking grounds and IS THAT A SWIMMING POOL I SEE?
And that seems like a very nice tennis court and what is that—
Oh.
Apparently that dog you gave me decided she needs to go out.
Which reminds me. I love dogs and all—and why do I get a small dog? Is this something against girls? That whole 'girls are weaker and like small, cute, fluffy things' is so not true any more. A terrier? Instead of a DOBERMAN?—but having therapy using dogs is ridiculous.
Honestly, how will a dog get me over my 'anger' issues?
Oh, and if she poops on the floor, I am not cleaning it.
—Your angry patient, Tenten
P.S. Please put the damn notebook back when you're done.
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Therapy For Dummies
Part I
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"COME BACK, YOU MUTT," Tenten yelled as she started to run across the field after 'her' dog. When she took her out for a stroll, Tenten didn't expect anything odd to happen.
Just the usual run-around-the-court, let's-tire-out-the-dog-and-owner thing.
Not the 100km sprint with her running, jumping, and dodging while chasing after a dog. At her speed, even a small rock could hurt.
"SERIOUSLY, IF YOU DO NOT STOP, I AM GOING TO SKIN YOU," she shouted after the small terrier as it went through a hole in the fence.
"Hello, Tenten-san. Please do not yell angry things at the dog," a counselor requested as he approached her, "Try to remain calm."
"Your dog is running away, and you are telling me to calm down?" Tenten glared at the counselor and then turned back to looking for the dog.
"Of course. It isn't the dog's fault that he has run off."
"What? So it's MY fault?"
"No. Of course not. It's merely a way of testing your patience. Believe and Kami-sama shall help you."
"…Right."
"Good to see you believe. Just pray with us."
"Mmmm….THERE'S THAT DOG. COME BACK HERE!" Tenten ran off, happy to get rid of that counselor. This was yet another thing she hated about this center.
There were too many annoying, religious counselors that always popped up when she was angry.
"There you are," she growled as she finally cornered the dog. Diving down, she managed to capture her. "If you want to play, I'll bring a ball next time. Don't run off again,—" Tenten paused for a moment, "What's your name again?" Looking at the tags, she noticed a name. "Konan, Kami-sama's tenshi? How…nice…"
-x-
Subject: YOU RELIGIOUS FREAKS
Mood: Slowly calming down. I think.
Music: God is a girl, wherever you are—well, at least you people have 'girl' right.
Location: I'd say something, but you'd probably bring "Kami-sama" into it.
Well, obviously you people need help. Why am I here when you people are the ones with problems?
Get this checked by the doctor:
1. Do you people even know how to name things?
2. A dog named Konan, Kami-sama's Tenshi? RIGHT. VERY NICE.
3. A tennis court called Stairway to Heaven?
4. A swimming pool called THE STORM?
5. Are you SERIOUS?
6. OH KAMI-SAMA, YOU ARE WORSE THAN NARUTO
7. No, I correct myself. You're worse than Sasuke
8. Oh, and you counselors need to learn how to be people
9. ARE YOU ALL BRAIN-WASHED OR SOMETHING
10. The whole "Believe in Kami-sama" thing is getting old
11. AND IT HAS ONLY BEEN A DAY.
12. Are you trying to convert my religion into whatever it is you robots believe?
13. I mean, it isn't enough that every conversation leads to:
14. "Oh, Tenten-san, why won't you believe in Kami-sama?"
15. Or "Tenten-san, our Kami-sama is forgiving, trust him."
16. OR EVEN, "Tenten-san, Kami-sama will help you open that bottle."
17. Oh no, that isn't bad enough.
18. Every morning, "Kami-sama's radio" plays, with "Kami-sama's music"
19. Every meal is "Kami-sama's works of art"
20. AND EVERY BOOK HAS "Kami-sama" ON EVERY OTHER LINE.
21. YOU ALL FAIL.
22. THE DOG'S NAME HAS Kami-sama IN IT TOO.
23. "God's Angel"? I'm worried what you feed her.
24. I SHOULD REPORT YOU ALL.
On the bright side, though, your sports equipment is working fine. The pool has a good length and depth, and the balls are tough….
Maybe I should go out and play. That'd help. And the dog can play too…
—sadly, still your prisoner, Tenten
P.S. WHICH ONE OF YOU STOLE MY CHOCOLATES? HMM?
P.P.S. I've noticed that you people have gone through my cell-phone. And my laptop. I can arrest you for that, you know.
P.P.P.S. Actually, since I'm sure you've gone through my contact list (looking for more victims) I thought I should give you advice. Ask Pinky—I mean, Sakura to come. She'll have fun.
-x-
Tenten looked up at the sun, wiping her brow. "Wow, it sure is hot."
"ARF!" the dog in front of her started to whine and she forced a smiled. "Ok, here's the ball, you demanding dog." Stretching her arm back, she threw the dirty tennis ball with as much as she could muster.
Wooosh! It flew through the air and covering her chocolate-brown eyes, Tenten saw it land somewhere in the distance.
She smirked; baseball practice sure came in handy.
"Go fetch, Konan!" The dog quickly ran off at this command and she laughed lightly. "Well, there goes the dog for a while."
Turning around, she walked back to the swimming pool and quickly took off her running shows. "Finally, I can go swimming…" she murmured as she dove into the pool. She had already gotten changed into her swimsuit when the dog decided to play fetch.
"Ohhh….It sure is nice in here…." she sighed as she swam in the cool water. She started to do her laps, cutting through the water with her hands and arms. Reaching the wall, she flipped underwater and kicked off, surfacing a few seconds later and continuing her front crawl.
Ten minutes later, she heard a splashing sound and quickly turned to look at it.
"Konan?" she gaped slightly as she saw the dog trashing in the water. Then Konan began swimming towards her.
"…I guess it was too hot for the dog too," Tenten mused, before heading towards the dog. "So, girl," she asked when she finally reached the dog, "want a treat after this?"
-x-
"Brr…it gets cold at night here," Tenten shivered as she quickly grabbed a towel out of her bag. Taking out her shampoo and soap, she turned to the dog.
"Stay here, Konan."
Then she turned to go to the showers—which were, oddly, located on the other side of the building and were more in the form of a public bath.
Locking the door, she started to walk towards the bath when she noticed the dog was with her.
"Wha—fine, Konan, you can stay," she sighed, bending down to pet the terrier's soft fur. "Don't make me regret this."
"Hmph!" the dog snorted as she led the way to the room.
"Hey! Don't go so fast, mutt!" Tenten called out, chasing after the dog. Running down the halls, she noticed that Konan had turned left. She turned left herself and—
-x-
Subject: I take back everything bad I said about you.
Mood: A happy, shiny feeling.
Music: What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more
Location: In that bright sparkly place called heaven. Yes.
I take back what I said about Konan, Kami-sama's Tenshi.
She can be Konan, Tenten-sama's Tenshi too now.
And it's ok that she's small. I love small dogs. Very much so.
Why am I so happy and deciding to tell you all of this? So that you can do me a favour.
After all, stealing and looking at my personal stuff is a federal offense. I can hurt you for that.
But I won't. As long as you put me in a certain class.
The small dog's and sports class. Terrible name, but I can live.
Why do I want that class? Because, my dog and I should have quality time together and we should be fit.
You know, to fight against diabetes and becoming lazy, fat people.
…And of course, because I should know my fellow prisi—I mean, my peers. After all, they can be nice.
There is (a very hot) one in particular I want to meet….
Itachi-sama. (Actually, that sounds tacky. I'll keep it Itachi-san for now.)
Hmm…your files—which, BTW, you should keep better hidden. The locks you have? Nothing on my tools—call him 'Uchiha, Itachi'.
Maybe he's related to Sasuke…In which case, he's probably a jerk too.
But they both have such good genes….I wonder if all of their family members look like that?
Actually, now that I think about it, all of the good-looking guys have girly appearances. And are very jerk-ish because of that.
OH. GOD. There is no way I am facing even more of that.
On second thought, don't put me in that class. I'm happy enough as I am. Knowing only two heartless, cold, idiotic girly-guys.
—feeling slightly depressed now, Tenten
P.S. Thank-you for giving me more chocolate. However, that does not mean you are off the hook. Especially as I am now missing my cell-phone and laptop.
-x-
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A/N: here's part one for now. I'll upload the rest later. Thought I should put this in now before I forget. This is for inkie Scribbles.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DARLING! Hope it's—so far—to your liking!
Oh, and I'm sorry Itachi came in at the end of this part. And about Tenten's character—it's kind of hard to keep her IC when she really doesn't show up much. (The really crazy parts of Tenten's character came from Remy's Shadow Lands and Ninja High. After reading those, it was hard to come back to thinking of Tenten as a serious character.)
Anyways, humour is not my strong point, but I think this came out ok…so far…
Why don't you review and tell me what you think?