Title: Sealand Sucks
Pairing: none
Rating: T for swearing, both American and British
Warnings: language, Sealand-bashing
Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia and never will.
Summary: England challenges America to raise Sealand. What follows is cracktastic adventures in parenting as America tries to raise the Principality of Sealand with help from Japan.
A/N: I got the idea from my best friend's and my intense dislike for a kid in our grade. I don't know where this story will go. My first Hetalia fic, and it is just cracky. If you notice any spelling/grammar mistakes, let me know :)
Chapter 1~The Challenge
The year was 1967 and England had finally had enough of his son, Sealand. The little tyke, created for specific purposes during WWII, had outlived his raison d'être and was driving England up the wall.
"Iggy, you can't just leave Sealand out on the sidewalk in a cardboard box," America said from his spot at the table. "That's, like, terrible parenting, bro."
Japan nodded. "Hai, I agree with America, England-san."
England turned red and yelled, "He's not even a bloody country!"
"Neither are the States," America countered. "But you don't see me leaving New York or Massachusettes out near the trash cans."
England scowled at his old ward. Ever since he'd gained independence he thought he knew everything. Then the old empire got a brilliant idea that would solve all of his problems.
"If you're so good at parenting, America, then why don't you raise the little Principality?" England said, all smug smirks.
"Fine! I will, because I'm the hero!" America said. England's smirk grew bigger and Japan facepalmed. America never could resist a challenge, especially from his father figure.
"And Japan has to help since he's living with me," America added and Japan groaned.
"But America-san..." the Asian country whined quietly.
"Yes," England consented. "Japan, you have to make sure America doesn't back out or kill the boy on accident."
"Hey!" America protested. "I'm an awesome parent!"
"Then it shouldn't matter if your best friend stays over to watch, will it?" England said. America grumbled.
"Um, excuse me Egland-san, but where is Sealand-kun?" Japan said, peering out the window.
America joined his friend at the window. "Shit, where'd he go?"
England cackled. "He's your pain now, America! Serves you right, cocky git!"
America swore again and ran outside to look for his new charge, followed quietly by Japan whk just muttered, "Oh, America..."
xLittleFoolx