Quest
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, Lord of the Rings, or any other story this may remind you of.
Sakura grit her teeth as dark red began to bloom across her chainmail under her cloak and fingers of numbness spread out from the wound on her side through the rest of her body. Not good. She pulled the cloak a bit tighter around herself. She didn't want any of her three companions to notice. They would undoubtedly want to stop to let her recuperate, but time was of the essence and this quest was far too important for them to fail. Far more important than her life.
She struggled on at the rear of the group for several more minutes before she looked up and saw two Narutos. She blinked and shook her head, watching as the two Narutos focused into one before splitting apart again. Now she was seeing double. This was really not good. But she had to keep going. She had to prove, to her people and to herself, that she could do this. That she was worth something, even if she was a half-blood.
Gradually, her ears filled with the sound of her own breathing, everything else becoming muffled and echoing as if she were hearing it through water. She couldn't feel her feet. Was her axe always this heavy? Then, with no idea how it happened, her cheek slammed against the earth. Funnily, she didn't feel anything. Wasn't she supposed to feel something? What was she doing again?
The world tilted and she had a brief view of the darkening sky through the green, green canopy of moss and trees before yellow filled her vision.
Naruto.
"Sakura! Sakura, what's wrong!"
Even though he was right above her, he sounded so far away. But that wasn't right, was it? She tried to open her mouth to ask him about it, but her tongue felt thick and heavy. So she decided to smile at him instead and discovered that her lips were numb. She tried to frown at her facial muscles' lack of response, but found she could not do that either. Before she could ponder why her body was rebelling against her, another face appeared above her and banished all other thoughts from her mind.
He was beautiful. Hair as black as the night, contrasting against pale, pale skin. Eyes that were dark and endless. She thought for a moment that this must be a spirit who had come to take her to the Havens. Kakashi had described them to her once. It was where you went when you perished on this world. She was dying right? This must be her escort. But then,
"Sakura."
he spoke her name. And his voice was familiar and wonderful and a name surfaced through her fuzzy thoughts.
Sasuke.
But wait. Had he always been so... so... What was that word again?
Beautiful.
Her mind came through for her once more.
He gently removed her helmet to place a cool hand on her forehead, and as she stared up at him, his words came to her quietly but clearly, unmarred by whatever it was that had affected Naruto's voice earlier. How did he do that?
"She's feverish."
He pulled her cloak aside and inhaled, short and sharp, through his nose as his eyes landed on the blood that had covered much of her chainmail on her left side. Naruto recoiled, horrified that she had been injured to this extent and none of them had even known. He looked up as a shadow fell over them to see Kakashi looking on as he leaned on his staff, eyes tight with worry.
"It must have happened when we fought the goblins. She defended me while I worked up the Stunning Spell. She was struck..."
Naruto looked back down at his fallen friend.
"I thought her armor protected her..."
Sasuke ran a hand along the hole that had been rent in her mail, trying to determine the size of her injury. He spoke again without looking up from the wound.
"We must find shelter immediately. Goblins and dwarves are natural enemies. Any wound inflicted by a goblin's weapon is acutely toxic to a dwarf. The only reason she was able to survive for this long is because she is not a full-blood. If she does not receive treatment soon..." he looked up at Naruto and Kakashi, his countenance grave. "She will die."
He turned back and slipped one arm under the girl's knees and the other around her shoulders and lifted her off the ground in one smooth movement, careful to avoid jostling her tender side.
"Come. Once we find cover, I will treat her. My people are learned in many forms of ancient medicine. I know only a little, but I will do everything I can to save her."
Naruto and Kakashi quickly divided up Sakura's pack and weapons and then they set off through the forest once more.
As she lay in Sasuke's arms, Sakura was losing the battle with the blackness encroaching on the edges of her vision. Her head rested against his firm chest and she suddenly felt so incredibly tired. She decided that she wouldn't mind dying if Sasuke could be her escort to the Havens. And with that final thought, she gave into the darkness.
~0~0~0~0~0~
Sakura slept fitfully all through the night, tossing and turning with the distorted and disorienting nightmares brought on by her fever. She awoke many times, gasping and struggling to escape whatever it was that plagued her dreams. But every time she woke, a cool compress would dab away the sweat from her forehead, a gentle hand would stroke the hair back from her face, and a soothing whisper would quiet her struggles and lull her back to unconsciousness.
"Sleep, Sakura. Sleep."
And every time, she did.
~0~0~0~0~0~
Sakura opened her eyes to see a rounded rock ceiling above her and knew exactly what had happened. She had succumbed. She fisted the material covering her, which she recognized as Naruto's cloak, in frustration. The movement apparently alerted the person leaning against the wall next to her.
"You're awake."
It was Sasuke. She didn't bother to look over at him. She was too ashamed.
"How are you feeling?"
She kept her eyes fixed on the cave ceiling and swallowed thickly in an effort to keep her emotions from spilling over.
"How long have I been asleep?"
He hesitated for a moment.
"Sakura, that is not really—"
"How. Long."
A long pause.
"This is the third day since your collapse," he finally admitted.
Three days! Three days could mean the difference between the success or failure of this quest! Here she was again, being a burden to everyone around her. Actually, thousands and thousands of lives depended on this quest and she was failing them all miserably. Just like she had always done. Just like her people expected her to.
She heard the elf let out a sigh beside her and shuffle closer. His face appeared in her line of vision as he studied her features. His thumb brushed against her cheek, and she belatedly realized that a single tear had slipped through her defenses. His expression softened and he stroked her cheek once more.
"Why do you try so hard to be strong?"
And with that one whisper, all of her walls crumbled. Maybe it was because she was tired of bottling everything up inside or maybe it was because she wanted to be pitied for once or maybe it was because he had sounded so, so tender. But she could no longer stymie her emotions and soon her words were flowing as quickly as her tears.
"Because that is all I have! I have been nothing but a disappointment from the very start! A dwarf for a father, but a human for a mother! My father did not even want me, but my mother died giving birth to me, so I had nowhere else to go! But that did not stop him from abandoning me soon after!"
Sasuke moved closer, listening to her every word, brow furrowing as her suffering was made known to him. She had never told anyone about this. But then, she had never had anyone to talk to outside of those who made her life miserable. She thought she would be trapped forever in the dark caverns and tunnels that seemed to suck the life out of her more every day. But then this quest presented itself and the freedom that it promised was like a breath of fresh air to her tortured soul. Freedom from the tunnels, yes. But more importantly, freedom from the judgment. Freedom from the pain. If she could prove to them all that she was worth something, that she could succeed, maybe her life would not be so hellish if and when she returned.
Her wound throbbed with each shaky gasp for air, but she pressed on, wanting—needing—to get this off of her chest.
"They all hated me. I was not a human, but I was not a dwarf either. I tried so hard to conform to their lifestyle, but I was never good enough for them! Day after day, all I ever heard was how I was useless and unimportant and burdensome. Sakura the Misfit. Sakura the Failure. Sakura the Mistake. Soon, I began to hate myself too. Some days, I just wanted to throw myself into one of the pits and be done with it all. But then I heard about this quest and I allowed myself to hope. If I could show my people that I was not a failure, that I could succeed at something, maybe they would not hate me so. This quest—my strength—it was the only way to prove myself to them. But now—"
Her voice broke and rose as her anguish reached a new height, and she let out a broken sob before she was able to speak again.
"Now I've failed, just like they all said I would! I hindered the quest and put countless lives in danger because I am weak! I do not know why I thought I could ever be more than Sakura the Mistake. It is obvious I cannot!"
She flinched, holding her side as her yelling agitated her injury. Sasuke's hands were now on her shoulders, urging her to calm down. Reminded once more of her weakness, Sakura felt all of the fight leave her and she allowed her head to loll to the side, away from Sasuke, before concluding her speech in a whisper.
"You should have just let me die."
At her words, Sasuke gripped her shoulders and gave her a small but firm shake. It was enough to cause her to look back at him, surprise on her face.
"You must never say such things again."
He looked...angry. Sakura had seen him when he was serious, focused and intense in battle, and even annoyed, but she had never before seen such dark anger in his features. She unconsciously shrunk back from his piercing gaze. He seemed to realize that he had alarmed her and quickly released his grip on her shoulders, but he maintained eye contact to make sure that she heard his every word.
"Sakura, life is one of the most precious gifts that any of us have received. You should never throw it away so easily."
Sakura scoffed weakly before once again turning her face away.
"Sure, if the life you have is worth living. Do you know how I have spent mine up until now? I woke up every morning already wishing the day was over. I lived just to make it to the end of another day. I had no purpose. And the one chance I had to prove myself is now gone. I have squandered the only reason I ever had to live."
Sasuke was silent. She heard him rise to his feet and prepare to leave. However, he spoke once more and his tone was the coldest Sakura had ever heard.
"So the fact that you saved Kakashi's life and therefore likely mine and Naruto's as well means nothing to you."
She looked up at him, astonished. His back was to her, however, and she could not see his expression. At her silence, he continued.
"If you had not defended Kakashi, he would not have been able to use the Stunning Spell, and we all may have perished in the Goblin Den. The quest would be over."
He rounded on her, making her flinch once more back into her bedroll.
"But that does not matter to you, does it? The only person you can think of is yourself. You are so fixated on your supposed weaknesses and failures that you cannot see the bigger picture. Your self-pity and self-loathing has blinded you, and it disgusts me to see you wallow in it. Because you are so much more than you can see, Sakura."
Tears were once again spilling from Sakura's wide green eyes, and Sasuke sighed once again before returning to kneel at her side.
"Did you ever consider the fact that you were the only one from your people to volunteer for this quest? No one else was willing to risk their lives for the sake of others. That in itself should be enough of a testament to your strength. As for your heritage, you should be grateful. Without it, you would likely be dead. No other dwarf could have survived the injury you sustained."
He took her cold, shaking hand in between his own and continued.
"So you see, this 'weakness' is actually part of what makes you so strong. It makes you who you are. Each individual is made up of numerous different parts, some good and some not. But without those parts, we would cease to be individuals."
Sakura sniffed, then glanced at him from the corner of her eye.
"That sounds like some highbrowed elvish blather. Did you come up with that all on your own?"
Sasuke smirked at her returned sense of humor before allowing a mask of seriousness to slip back over his features.
"Why do you care so much about the opinions of those who care nothing for you?"
Sakura lowered her gaze to her lap.
"It's the only home I have ever known, Sasuke. Everyone wants to feel loved and accepted in their own home."
She continued to look down, feeling incredibly vulnerable under his gaze. After a few moments of weighted silence, he spoke softly once more.
"Maybe it is time you found a new home."
She looked up at him sharply.
"What?"
He searched her face.
"After this quest is over, you could return with Naruto and me to Konoha. There are members of nearly every race there. You would be accepted for you."
Sakura was struggling to form a coherent sentence. She had never considered simply leaving the caves and her people behind. She had never had anywhere to go. Could this actually be a possibility? Could she really create a new life for herself?
"Sasuke, I-I just don't know—"
"Why are you so hesitant? You said yourself that there is nothing there for you. Why not be with people who care about you?"
She had no argument for that.
He stood once more and made his way to the cave entrance.
"So it is settled. You will return to Konoha with us after the quest."
Sakura frowned.
"You sound so confident that we will succeed. How can you be so sure?"
Sasuke looked over his shoulder with a smile lifting his lips.
"We have Sakura the Loyal, the Brave, and the Strong among us. How could we fail?"
And with that he stepped from the entrance and disappeared into the mid-morning sun.
Sakura simply stared at the spot where he had been standing. A single tear made its way down her cheek before she lifted her arm to scrub her face free of the dampness left behind by her overflowing emotions. She then dropped her hands back into her lap, revealing a small but genuine smile. This quest—these people—she realized, were the best thing that ever happened to her.
She closed her eyes and allowed sleep to overtake her once more. She was going to need to rest up to be at the top of her game. After all, her companions needed her.
Sasuke...
Thank you.
~0~0~0~0~0~
A/N:
Hello everyone! Whew, that took way too much effort. BUT I HAD TO WRITE SOMETHING FOR THAT WONDERFUL FANTASY AU COVER! I know, I know, that was like, 10 chapters ago. Now you know what I meant when I said it took too much effort.
ANYWAYS. I hope you guys enjoy this. I freaking love this AU. And may or may not decide to turn this into a multi-chap. But I have three other stories/one-shots that I'm trying to work on simultaneously (which may be why I haven't finished any of them yet...), so we'll just have to wait and see. Also I apologize that the end of this one is so similar to my other story Breathe. Apparently, I just can't help myself. If you haven't read it, don't worry about it.
Reviews not required, but they do make me happy :)