Such As Life, a ōkiku furikabutte/big windup!/おおきく振りかぶって fanfic

Very Important Note: ( and this will be in the next few stories I upload. )

Okay. This story was written in 2011/12 -END OF 11 OR BEGINNING OF 12- can not remember which. It was deleted from my account. So if you seen it before you have, it only has been rewritten. Thank you.

I changed this over before now, sorry for those who remember. I am not bothering to tell anyone this time round, seeing as I got on other's nerves the last time.

The long winter's night air was cold, very cold. Behind the clouds that was filled snow the full moon tried to shine through, but only some blurs of light manage to pass. On nights like this most people were in their warm beds dreaming soundly, unaware of the heavy snow that had just finished covering the earth above.

One young man braved the heavens and the coldness of the night; Fifteen year old Mihashi Ren stood on the mount in the snow covered baseball field of his middle school, that was owned by his Grandfather, the young man was leaning forwards with his hands resting on his knees as he tried to catch his breathe. White vapour escaped from his mouth each time he breathe outwards, but with every breath Ren took inwardly the icily air filled his lungs making it becoming painful to stay outside.

Ren paid no mind to his screaming lungs as he starting taking another breath, then suddenly straightening himself upright and stared hard at the place where the Catcher should be. Under the beaming lights of the baseball field, a wooden broad could be seen in sitting in the Catcher's box, on this broad lines were painted across and in dead centre was a skull; other then these, the only marks were ones made from an impact of the balls that Ren had been throwing, the odds marks were always gather in ten spots and never left the places of the lines or the skull that was drawn there; this was prove of the young man's skill as a Pitcher.

Ren moved his left hand upwards, brushing off the snow that had settled on his hair with his baseball glove, the beaming lights from above started to shine on his light brown hair. Finished with the snow Ren then shook as his wildly, droplets of the melted snow as well as his sweat, flew in every direction.

Ren then quickly bend downwards on his right side, reaching into a basket that was filled baseballs, he grabbed the first one that came to his hand and once again straighten himself. Ren's hazel eyes were seemingly glaring at the broad before, however the frozen tear stains down his cheeks showed that he was not angry; Ren was instead trying to keep from crying more as the water made his eyes and cheeks sting.

Ren's eyes narrowed as he focused on the skull, and turning his whole body to the right he bought his left leg upwards to his body so that he was standing only on one leg, at the same time Ren placed his right with ball into his left gloved one and then raised it up slightly, his eyes never wavered from the skull and soon Ren was once again in perfect form for a pitch. Then he took a large step forwards down the mount, his right arm came in rolled and was used as a slingshot just released the baseball from his grip.

Ren did not smile when the ball hit its target; the skull. Instead his eyes welled up and fat tears began to fall down his cheeks. Ren was still standing in the same pose as he was then the ball had been thrown; his right hand in front of him outstretched, balancing on one leg, he slowly began pulling himself in and then Ren jumped in shock as he noticed the he was no longer standing on the mount and turned in a hurry.

Ren gazed down at the snow covered mount and let his thoughts wonder back to the years threes since he started middle school and how he came in be in this state. The reason was due to the the fact that he was bullied.

In the first year of school, all was fine. It was at the end of the first year that Ren noticed the changes from his team mates but thought noting of it, then second year came and day after day Ren could feel the glares coming from them. The whispers started only stopping once they saw that he was coming, they started taking amongst themselves not letting Ren into the talks.

Then the whispers were louder, this time they started the whispers once they saw he was in ear shot. Ren knew he done something wrong then, and tried to ask each one of his team mates. Ren heard it; His pitches were too down, he was making them lose games.

Ren had said he understood, they seemed happy about this and told Ren that he should stand down from the mount. This was the one thing Ren could not do, Ren loved to pitch and felt that it was the one thing in his life that he was good at, and so he told them out right that he would never leave the mount. The team was enraged by this and took it up with the coach, but because of who Ren was the coach let Ren continue on and become the Ace.

Things got worst for Ren from then on and soon this was noticed by the students from his class, stories of how bad of a pitches he was spread across the school, also of how he was using his grandfathers name to get what he wanted in from the teachers.

The class mates began their bulling then.

Ren's indoor school shoes would take a walk, coming back too damaged to wear. Homework went missing until in the end Ren give up studying completely, his marks started to fall. Ren desk would be written all over or a small vase of flowers would greet him in the morning. The teachers took no note of what was happens, and sometime he would catch their eye and they would turn away.

Ren by nature had always been a timid person, but by the time the third year came Ren was more timid and afraid then ever before. Ren's pride, confidence and heart was ripped away from him, to the point that he no longer knew why he was living or why he was even born.

Ren gritted his teeth hard as more tears poured down.

Ren glance at the snow covered ground, a trail of dark spots were in front of him, leaning to the Catchers box. Ren blinked at this, not knowing what the strange black patches were, until he moved forwards a bit and saw under the light the true colour was red. Blood.

Ren stood up, crying out a little as he did so, he pulled his arms to his chest fists tighten against his cheeks as he glance around thinking that someone was there with him, someone who was bleeding. It was then Ren noticed his right hand, thick liquid dripped his closed fingers; slowly and fearfully Ren opened his hand and gazed at what laid before him, his whole right hand was filled with broken blisters. Ren just stared down, and moved the index finger; Ren could not any pain, his hand was completely numb; in fact, Ren realized that his whole of his arm was numb and slightly wondered how he had been pitching like this.

Ren stood there for some time just staring and before long Ren's eyes slowly widen and his lower lip wobbled, a new wave of tears came streaming down his face as panic began to bubble fore in his heart.

Suddenly he stopped and let his arms drop beside, Ren stared up at the dark sky with dazed eyes. Then he spun round and walked quickly over to where his bag was, and kneeing down he started looking through it.

Ren found his knife, and held it up to his arm before hovering it over his wrist.

"No one would miss me," Ren's voice came out hoarse, he stared at his wounded hand sadly. It was his pitching hand, which caused him both great joy and sorrow. Ren could hear them, they voices talking to him in the back of his head, his team mate, his class mates and the teachers all of them telling him to do it. "No one..."

Ren lowed the blade and was about the push his full force into his wrist when he saw the folders his mother had sent him. Blinking Ren removed the knife and let it fall to the ground as he reached for the papers, his face held no emotion his re-read the letter from his mother, he never gave it a second thought earlier that day as he had what seemed to be the worst day of his life; his Catcher had cornered Ren and told him not to play for the team once they went into high school, and for the second time promised to break his arm.

However Ren's mother was asking if he wanted to move back in with her and go to a high school near there, one that did not have a Baseball team. Ren gazed back at the mount and then back at the letter and the folder which gave him information about the school.

"I want to live." Ren said with a cry, baseball was his life, he had given his everything to it. But it seem the time had come for Ren to say goodbye. "If I go to a new school I can start over. Find some friends, friends who will never leave me alone and never betray me. But I..."

Re closed his eyes and threw his head to the ground and smashed his face into the snow again and again. Ren got up slow with a dazed look across his face, he wanted to pitch some more, one last time before he went.

"For me not to pitch any more," Ren whispered to the empty air, walking slowly towards to mount, Ren once more stood at the mount and grabbed his glove that he could not remember then he had taking off and a baseball from the basket, "A part of me is already dead."

The long winter's night air was cold, very cold. Behind the clouds that was filled snow the full moon tried to shine through, beams of moonlight fell to the ground illuminating the world below. One mornings like this most people were eating breaking or just rolling out of bed, unaware of the heavy snow that had fallen the night before.

One young man braved the heavens and the coldness of the mornings; Fifteen year old Mihashi Ren stood on the mount in the snow covered baseball field of his middle school, the young man was leaning forwards with his hands resting on his knees as he tried to catch his breathe. His breathe was laboured, white vapour came out his mouth with each painful lungful.

Ren cared little for his screaming lungs, he took another breathe and held he; suddenly straightening himself upright and glared at the place where the Catchers should be. Under the fading moonlight and raising sun a wooden broad still stood, waiting to be hit.

With ball in hand, Ren started his pose, readying his pitch.

Ren did not smile as the ball hit its target, instead he looked to the pinky sky thinking about what kind of future he would have without him pitching or baseball. Ren blinked at this thought, and then burst out into tears he slowly walked away from the mount.