Yeah...my muse has been ignored or outright shoved away for a while, due to life. I'll finish my stories eventually, but not anytime soon. I'm still alive though :) In the meantime, here's a crackfic! that just occurred to me. Feel free to adopt & expand upon it - I don't have the time, but I'd love to see it done properly. Just had to get it out. ;)
Magic must defeat 'Magic'.
Brockton Bay – a city of grimdark capes who tore at each other without restraint save for their own unwritten set of rules; except for today. Today, the greatest threat to mankind imagined – an Endbringer – had set its sights upon their home, and all of them were preparing to die to defend it.
Including one very strange old Asian man, whose cape name seemed to be..."Uncle".
Just as Legend, the famous laser-wielding member of the Triumvirate, was wrapping up his 'Well, shit, most of us are going to die but hey that's sort of how this kind of battle goes' speech, all of the assorted capes found themselves bound in place by some kind of strange energy field. Outside of that energy field, a lone man – the cape named 'Uncle' – walked out towards the burgeoning tide-breaks which would bring forth Leviathan, the water-controlling Endbringer.
Ten minutes later, as the paralyzed capes watched Leviathan be sucked into a tiny bottle amidst chanting of "Yu Mo Gui Gwai Fai Di Zao", all of them were collectively wondering..."What the hell just happened?"
Fifteen minutes later, 'Uncle' merely told them, "Uncle told you! Cape fighting does not bring victory against Endbringer! Endbringer is just dream of a shui gui – made of dreams, and goes back to dreams! Do you think Dream can be defeated by fancy Laser-beams and Guns ? No!...Magic must defeat magic!"
Shaking his head, 'Uncle' began to walk away...
*SMACK* went the sound of "Uncle's" fingers impacting upon Eidolon's head roughly
"Ow!", said the power-shifting hero, as he was unexpectedly lowered to mortal levels of pain tolerance for no other reason than to provide emphasis for 'Uncle' and his lessons.
"One More Thing!...Uncle says to extremely-rude-young-man-who-stepped-on-my-foot-in-rush-to-get-to-battle...Go Get Some Therapy!"
*SMACK* went the sound of "Uncle's" fingers impacting upon Eidolon's forehead yet again, driving him into unconsciousness..and somehow knocking out all the Endbringers in existence.
*cue Uncle's theme music as he dramatically walks away, cleaning off his blowfish*