Don't be too hard with me, I don't speak English so well. This is my firt english fic and my first Kahlan x Cara fic. The only thing I own is the story, not the characters. Tell me what you think of this. I have ideas for the rest of the story, but it would be useless to continue if it doesn't interest anyone. What I could understand because I've never really been good at it. And even less in English.

Lately,Cara was in a bad mood. And even though that might be useful in fights (Cara killed many more banelings than usual, Zedd, Richard and Kahlan agree they would not like to face a Mord'Sith as angry as Cara were), it was rather unpleasant the rest of the time. If at least they knew what was bothering her, they may try to solve the problem. Cara herself wasn't sure. But she knew it had to do with her attitude. She wasn't the same. She even told Kahlan that she considered her to be her friend. Was she angry at Kahlan to make her feel that way or against herself for letting her emotions control her? She just couldn't answer to that question. And it wasn't only Kahlan. Although she often made comments to the wizard, she found his excessive appetite rather funny. And finally there was Richard, the new Lord Rahl. A mord'sith lived only to serve him. During her childhood she had been told that Darken Rahl was wonderful, she admired him and really wanted to serve him. But since she knew Richard, she realized that this admiration for Darken Rahl was not so real. It was fake. Richard was so different from Darken Rahl! He didn't impose rules (except she had to learn to hunt, but finally she found it pleasant and entertaining) and more than anything he did not hesitate to put himself in danger to protect her. He cared for her, she mattered to him. Cara enjoyed his companions more than she would have liked. For the first time she wondered where the problem was. Moreover, was there really a problem? Although a Mord'Sith was supposed to be insensitive but since all this began, she had lost some required criteria. Starting with the fact that she would give her life for the Mother Confessor. Perhaps the best thing to do was to do nothing. Just stop fighting against what she felt. After all she could see it as a new beginning. A chance of no longer being a monster and become someone else in this red leather. She could become like everyone.

"Cara?"

Cara looked up at the man who had just talk to her. She was overwhelmed by her thoughts and it lasted for a while now.

"A problem?"
"Would you mind to collect firewood? Kahlan went looking for roots and Zedd for fruits. And I'll set up the camp."
"I'm on my way Lord Rahl"

It took longer than was necessary to bring the wood, but then again, the questions that resonated in her head prevented her from concentrating. When she arrived, Zedd and Kahlan were already back. But obviously, it didn't last long because otherwise she would have received a furious glare from Zedd. He didn't like to wait when it came to eat!

"Sorry for the delay"

Richard, Kahlan and Zedd looked visibly surprised. Since when she cared about being late?

"In fact you arrived at the right time" Zedd said with a smile (the same smile that showed every time he was going to eat!).

After preparing the meat, they ate in silence. Zedd had his eyes on his plate,Richard and Kahlan were throwing and complicit glances before Kahlan come snuggle against him. Cara watched them discreetly. When the lips of two lovers met, Cara tightened her jaw. She did not like to see them like that. She didn't know why but it really upset her. But not as much as dreaming of being instead Richard, holding Kahlan in her arms. First, Mord'Sith aren't supposed to dream and second, even less of a Confessor. She put a hand on her Agiel to stop thinking about Kahlan that way. It took her a long time to admit that Kahlan was her friend and she hoped that having feelings for her would take at an eternity. She didn't want to be in love with someone that different from her. The only common they had was they were related to Richard. One by the heart, the other by her duties. However, she likes it or not Kahlan was someone she greatly appreciated. Richard was the one who had taken the first step toward her, but Kahlan was the real person who had made her "weak" by making her feel things like friendship. Kahlan was the first person to take the first step to her soul and spirit.

"I would keep the camp all night" Cara said "No you won't. Rotations can be made you know." "This is true but you all seem tired. And it's only one night, it's not difficult to overcome! Not for me anyway"
"Well if that is so kindly offered ..." Zedd said, stretching. "And you know we shouldn't conflict Mord'Sith, Richard" He used an innocent voice. A fake innocent voice.
"This is not negotiable Lord Rahl"
"Okay, I grant you that night because it's true that I actually need sleep. But that's not going to happen like that next time."
"As you wish Lord Rahl"
"Stop calling me like that."
"But you're the Lord Rahl, stop denying it."
"I'm not denying it, but when you talk like that it sounds you're like a slave and I don't like it."
"We already had this conversation a thousand times. I'm Mord'Sith and my duty is to serve and protect you."
"You're right about the thousand times. It is useless to talk about it since we never agree!"

Cara smiled. Once again, she surprised everyone with her reaction. Usually she would have simply rolled her eyes. They finished eating in silence. Zedd still looked at his plate, which was emptying too fast for his taste, Richard and Kahlan exchange smiles again while Cara returned to her thoughts. Cara apart, they were not slow to go to bed and they immediately fall asleep.
After a few hours, Cara realized she had her eyes on Kahlan. She was someone physically attractive, but this was her way of thinking, acting or even just the way she was that drove her... crazy. Finally, no it wasn't true. No, it was when she smiled and her face lit up that Cara could hear the beating of her heart echoing in her ears. Except that "this" smile was reserved for Richard. She could deny it as long as she wanted, but Kahlan always found the way to reach her heart, intentionally or not. Cara had made the mistake of revealing her feelings once and since Kahlan took the opportunity. 'No she doesn't take advantage of this, she is like that that's all' thought the blonde with a smile. Suddenly she heard a noise. She immediately grabbed her Agiels and went on her guard until she realized it was Kahlan who was turning again and again in her bedroll. Cara sat down.

"You should sleep Kahlan. Banelings attacks are more frequent lately and we need all of your energy. Well, you need your energy to defend yourself" Cara corrected.
"I'd like to but I can't"
"What's stopping you? Bad dream?" said Cara in a mocking tone.
"I don't think so. I don't remember dreaming of you." replied Kahlan, making the two of them smiling.
"Then what is it?"
"I don't know."
"I think I can do something for you."
"What will you do, stun me?"

This time she wasn't smiling, she was laughing.

"Maybe I will if you continue like that."

Cara stood behind Kahlan and made her lie down. Then she began to massage her head. Cara knew exactly the sensitive points of the head. The effect was immediate, Cara could feel Kahlan's muscles relaxing.

"I've changed my mind, I don't want to sleep anymore"
"Your body also changed his mind, he wants to sleep now."
"But it feel so nice!"
"I could make you feel so much better Kahlan" She wanted to say it. But she didn't.
"Except you wont last long" Cara finally said "It couldn't be more true"
"And if I was doing the full version, it wouldn't have took you ten seconds to fall asleep"
"Full version? What's that?"
"You can't even imagine the number of spots that are responsive on your body." 'Especially one between your legs' Cara smiled before realizing what she was thinking. "You'd be like a mollusk so much your muscles would be relaxed"
"Stop tempting me. You know that I can't allow myself to relax like that. If you do this too much, I may confess you."

Cara slid her hands until she reaches Kahlan's shoulders. Once more she put her fingers in the right place and did the right thing. Kahlan moaned. 'I can make you moan so much louder' Cara closed her eyes. She had to st...

"Stop it!"
"You don't scare me Mother Confessor." whispered Cara softly (maybe too softly).
"Don't take it lightly Cara. Maybe you're not scared but I am. I'm scared about what could happen! So stop doing this."
"Ok you won. So stop resisting and sleep." Cara whispered again (with that same damn tone). She remained silent a few minutes.
"Kahlan, if you want to sleep you should close your eyes you know."
"It would be too bad, it's not often I see that smile on your face."
"I wasn't smiling!" Cara groaned.
"Sure. If you say so."

Once Kahlan had closed her eyes, she fell asleep immediately. But Cara wasn't willing to withdraw her hands from Kahlan's hair. They were beautiful and so pleasant to touch. And when she finally decided to stop touching her head, it was only to go down to her neck. Her skin was so soft, she could do that all night. Kahlan was just in front of her, she could do whatever she wanted to her. But she knew she wouldn't do anything. 'If she's asleep, she won't scream my name. And worst of all, I could hear Kahlan say his name' she told to herself. But that wasn't the true reason. She had become shy when it came to Kahlan. She won't do anything to her that Kahlan wouldn't like. And Kahlan just told her to stop. But, of course, she won't admit it. She let her fingers explore her face. Cara closed her eyes and memorized every part of Kahlan's face. If she kissed her now no one would know... but then again she didn't allow her lips to taste hers. Instead, she stroked them with her thumb. Before she could realize it, she touched her own lips with that same thumb. That's what made her go. She couldn't let Kahlan drove her crazy like that. Even when she was sleeping she found the way to possess her. While she removed her hands, she heard Kahlan moaning again. For the first time since she had become a Mord'Sith she blushed. 'you told me to stop, but the one who has to stop it's you Kahlan! Stop make me feel that way!' She went back to the dying fire and put some wood. She returned to sit on the rock. Cara remembered perfectly the touch of her hands on Kahlan's skin. 'maybe you're right, I'm the one who has to stop'. Kahlan was happy with her life and Cara could bear it. And anyway, expressing her feelings were more unbearable for Cara than seeing Richard and Kahlan together. So all she had to do was to overcome her feelings. She'd done it many times, but it wasn't the same. This feeling was stronger than others. And even if it had been like the others, it was different since she had met those three. Cara smiled ironically. 'Since when Mord'Sith have doubts? Mord'Sith aren't suppose to have any. Mord'Sith aren't suppose to be friend with the Mother Confessor. Mord'Sith aren't suppose to...fall in love with the Mother Confessor.' But Kahlan was so much more than that to her.