Prologue: Burning

Not, I'll not, carrion comfort, Despair not feast on thee;

Not untwist- slack they may be- these last strands of man

In me, or, most weary, cry I can no more. I can;

Can something, hope, wish day come, not choose not to be.

-Gerard Manley Hopkins (1844-89)

~ Merlin. . .

The Great Dragon's feeble whisper drew him from the depths of slumber. The call sounded like the rasp of an old man on his deathbed. But the rush of foreign excitement that followed, as the dragon's mind touched his, was enough to snap him awake, wide-eyed and pulse beating fast.

~ Kilgharrah

He sought the faint presence of the dragon's mind and grasped it, tethering the gossamer thread of the dragon's magic to his own and suppressing the reflexive urge to ask 'what' and 'why' for the dragon's sake, knowing that the old creature could not answer without great difficulty.

~ Save your strength. I will come to you.

He felt Kilgharrah's assent and the connection faded, leaving Merlin with a borrowed sense of anticipation that he could not fathom. It made him feel strangely alive for the first time in nearly three hundred years. Arthur, he thought, even as he tried not to hope too much or too soon. Arthur is returning!

~ Arthur is not returning, young warlock. You are.

The weight of the disappointment rendered Merlin speechless for a long moment before Kilgharrah's second sentence registered, and then he sighed at it and said with a long-suffering air, "Kilgharrah, those two words are supposed to have a simple meaning but with you-" he cut himself off and asked instead, "What does that even mean? I'm returning?"

The golden eyes of the Great Dragon were covered in a thin, white film as he stared in Merlin's general direction and he did not move from his prone position on the bed of sharp, glittering rocks and mineral deposits. Too weak in body now to use his own voice, the dragon spoke to Merlin through their shared connection.

~ The prophecies call Arthur the 'Once and Future King' not in reference to the land, but rather in reference to you. That part of the prophecy revolves around you, Merlin. Arthur may have been destined to be the greatest king this land has ever known but he is the Once and Future King only to you.

Merlin stared at the greying face above him as tried to understand the explanation, but the dragon only blew out a warm breath and grew sad.

~ You have lived like a ghost and a penitent since Arthur died three hundred and thirty three years ago, trying to atone for what you perceived to be your greatest failure: Arthur's death before he could achieve even a fraction of the greatness he was meant to achieve. And with him, the loss of the dream for a glorious and united Albion.

Merlin's whole body stilled and his heart turned to stone in his chest as the dragon pulled at the stitches of old wounds that refused to heal. Time had only made it fester within him.

~ Fate knew that you would fail the first time around.

His head snapped up at that. "The first. . .?"

The dragon gave a mental nod.

~ It was not your fault that Arthur died, Merlin. Your destiny had always been far too heavy for your young shoulders. It is not too heavy for you now. You have grown into your power and your wisdom has grown with it. You are ready to return to the past to fulfill your destiny once more, and this time, you shall see it truly fulfilled in all its glory, as it was prophesied.

The dragon's mind spread itself around his, warm with something like affection and joy and pride.

~ Your exile is over, Merlin.

He tried to remember how to breathe even as his knees gave way under him and he half-fell, half-sprawled on the cold floor of the cave. He felt like a little child all of a sudden as he choked out through a voice thick with tears, "You promise?" He wasn't sure whether he was asking if he could truly go back to the past to see Arthur again or if he was asking for assurance that he won't fail this time. Perhaps it was both.

But Kilgharrah answered immediately with a resounding conviction and a steady throb of his great heart which Merlin felt in his own chest. I promise.

There was only one question left in Merlin's mind now: "What must I do?"

~ To erase and change what fate and human choice has written into the fabric of time itself, you must become more than yourself and I more than myself. It requires power and a nature beyond you alone or I alone, though we two are the most powerful magical beings left in this world.'

The dragon sensed Merlin's exasperation and gave up his high speech in favour of the more direct but, to him, rather crude route:

~ What you must do is choose to freely give up the little that is left of your human and mortal nature and accept the dragon blood that runs in your veins, which ran also in the veins of all the dragonlords who came before you.

Merlin felt Kilgharrah smile, anticipating Merlin's question.

~ Balinor can explain to you the lore of how dragonlords came to be. But for now, all you need to understand is that all the human dragonlords are descended from the single union of a dragon and a human maiden'.

Merlin's ears burned red as he tried to imagine how that union could be possible. Thankfully, Kilgharrah's explanation was simple.

~ The dragon was no ordinary dragon. He was the heir to the Dragonking, born with the power to command all the other dragons. As the Dragonking heir he had the power also to take any shape he wanted, including human form'.

"And once I accept the dragon blood and cast away my human side, what then?" Merlin asked, though he thought he already knew the answer. Even so, it was a difficult concept to wrap his mind around and he needed to hear Kilgharrah say it.

~ You will become a dragon forever more. You will be my legacy; my offspring. The dragon paused, and added gravely, ~ You will be immortal. Such is the consequence of being both Emrys and true dragon.

The dragon raised his great, scaled head and the muscles beneath his armoured limbs gathered themselves. When he spoke next, his words were heavy and warm with power.

~ Do you accept these terms, for payment or for reward, as just dues for the chance to walk again the path of destiny long gone?

The dragon crept forward with laboured breath.

~ Do you, Merlin, of your own free will, choose to give up the blood and flesh bestowed upon you by your human mother and your human father, and accept mine in exchange?'

Another heaving step and the dragon was upon him, clouded eyes flame-bright but unseeing, his unspoken words morphing into something more like dragon tongue.

~ Will you become blood of my blood, spark of my fire, voice of my thunder-cry; a legacy unto me and all who came before me?

This time Merlin responded without words and the dragon felt his answer strike and burn through both their hearts like a bolt of lightning setting a tall tree ablaze.

~ And I, in turn, will offer you freely and willingly, my life, my magic, my blood, and all that I was or will be, the dragon said, as with the last of his strength, he wrapped his scaled body around the warlock, spiked tail coiling about them both and wings snapping out to enclose Merlin in darkness for a brief moment.

Then white-hot flame engulfed them both, consuming them in a twisting inferno of magic and fire. Merlin would remember little of the experience forever after except for vague impressions of red-gold threads of power twining in a dance with what he knew to be his own lightning-blue, ozone-sparked magic; the two merging and separating and melting together again. Vaguely, he thought of how swords were forged and felt a faint protest at being made thus in a similar fashion, like a weapon at the hands of fate, but then he was the blue-white heart of the fire itself and he hissed and roared and thought no more.

Review! Tell me what you think! This is un-betaed. All proofreading and editing is done by me.

The next chapter is being written. Nearly the entire half of the story is plotted out on my notebook, filling up nearly 50 pages of drafts and rough ideas; but after that. . . well. . . If you have some great ideas later on, after I've established the basic foundations of the story, then I'll be taking suggestions. For now, please hand out your encouragements. Here, here!