"When Everything Ends…"
oOo
The sun was slowly slipping in the East in the wake of the mountains stretching miles and miles high. The air enfolded in its crumbling light. Thriving cries of men drew in, echoing beneath the heavens. Though the sound was as small as a grain of sand in the vast world, their compulsion measured up to the terrain around them.
Swords sparked. The enemy center had torn open as King Phillip charged through with his men.
The ground, they had shaken up in battle, flooded over with blood, filling in the aged cracks that once told a story about the now soggy land. Corpses were stacking high…so high, some men fled like cowards for their lives while black hungry birds crowed in the sky waiting for the last man to fall so that they may feast for the day.
The stench of blood and death was a weapon in itself and the land was as vibrant as it will ever be again.
Swords, spears and arrows slashed and penetrated the hearts of the devoted warriors. Shields had been lifted high but it didn't stop the bodies from diminishing and the tugging cries of those dying broke once again. They were losing ground as more lost lives multiplied.
War has never been so thunderous. So revered. This was a battle only men belonged.
There were over 60,000 soldiers positioned on the turf at the start and though numbers had fallen swiftly, the remaining who still clashed beneath the exploded rays of the sun were still immense. The enemy continued to fight fiercely and with a passion that King Phillip's army had never faced before. And though victory wasn't certain in Phillip's eyes someone much fiercer than even the enemy, than even Phillip himself, had entered the battle.
Charging towards the front enemy line they had held firm, a teenaged Alexander led his commanded left wing with a force as potent as the mightiest Titan. The blonde young warrior rushed through the gap he had formed. He didn't look back; he didn't make sure that his men his father had sent to protect him were at his side. One would have thought that he was in this alone.
The enemy formed into a defensive pattern as the young prince crashed his shield against another's sending a few back. He lifted his battle worn sword, launched a powerful roar and proceeded to draw blood while his men swarmed through the main body surrounding the rest of the enemy.
He was a true warrior. He fought as if he was born for this. He fought as if the battlefield was his home; his release. But his rage and lust to win, his desperateness to impress his father, left him unfocused of his surroundings. Luckily he was guarded by another. By his best friend.
The radiant blue eyed youth withdraws two short blades from his side and began cutting the throats of the attacking foes. He had lost his sword somewhere in the dead lands after receiving a harsh slice to his lower arm during a minor struggle, but he remained agile and skilled, killing quick and surviving even quicker. It was rare that this spark of fight shown in him. But it was also well known that Hephaistion would never fight this hard for himself or for anyone…unless you were Alexander.
Hephaistion wasn't the most liked in the kingdom, which he was well aware of, but those who despised him knew that to protect Alexander was to protect the Princes blue eyed friend for the Prince cherished him above all...something Hephaistion was still oblivious too.
Alexander, after realizing victory may come sooner due to directly opposing his father's orders, stopped in his tracks. Breathing hastily he now gazed upon the devastation of the piled bodies of the beloved fighters, the beloved enemy. The Sacred Lovers. He wiped his sweaty brow and looked at his hand smeared in his own blood, dripping from an open gash upon his head that he didn't know he had. He looked up again as he now watched the beautiful Band fight harder. Not backing down. Defending their own even though they knew nothing could be gained. The Prince tensed at the sight and valor was lost from his fair gaze. His glare hardened as he watched the enemy almost in defeat holding their dearly loved and it caused his heart to quake and the hand wielding his weapon to tremble. He blinked and allowed his blade to slip from his fingers and fall at his foot while his father and his father's men finalized the attack.
Moved by courage, moved by love, the conquering Prince turned and sought out his filthy and long-suffered companion. Still fighting. Still defensive. Still adoring. He was now considering something he had always thought about.
Hephaistion brought an enemy to his knees and quickly inserted his sharp dagger through the man's neck giving him a swift death. He then rested the flaccid body gently on the ground looking apologetic. He backed away, breathing in spurts with the back of his hand pressed against his mouth. He was looking and feeling lost like something wasn't transmitting completely, like the eyes of the man dead at his foot shouldn't have appeared so vacant. Then he felt a definite gaze on him, a gaze he could sense anywhere and as his head came up he found the Prince staring. Standing there as if awestruck by something. His first reaction was to worry as he surveyed the man who was now unarmed. "Alexander!" He called out to his future king and quickly ran to his aid. "Alexander, what in fucking Hades is wrong with you!?" He yelled with a strictness most men wouldn't have the audacity to display before their royal highness. "The battle isn't won. Pick up your sword. Be ready to defend yourself!"
But brown eyes remained on his beloved friend. They were gleaming and focused.
"Alexander, do you hear me? If you die or get hurt, I will never forgive myself. Or you. Pick it up!"
"Hephaistion, what do you think of me?"
Taken aback by the random question and the fact that he straight up ignored his concern, blue eyes squinted in confusion and annoyance. "I think that this question isn't appropriate for battle."
"Are we friends?"
"We're friends. You know that."
Hephaistion thought the reason for Alexander's weird behavior was due to the freely opened wound on his head. He visually examined it and determined that it wasn't as bad as he thought, then bent by Alexander's side, lifted the steel sword from the ground and handed it to him.
The Prince grasped the handle but didn't look at all prepared to use it. Hephaistion frowned discerningly as he wiped at Alexander's cut with his thumb while also keeping concerned eyes on him. The Prince didn't flinch once probably finding it to be just a simple scratch. "What were you thinking Alexander? What has you distracted enough to want to ditch your sword?"
Then Alexander spotted his friends wound and he no longer cared about his own. "You're hurt Hephaistion. Your arm? Let me see it." Alexander tried to take a look but Hephaistion snatched his arm away and hid it behind his back so that his friend could focus.
"Focus." He pointed at him in reprimand.
"Let me just see it." Alexander sighed guiltily.
'No."
The blonde teen sneakily tried to clutch his friends arm but Hephaistion pressed a warm hand on his chest to keep him back and the second he touched him, his hand shuddered slightly. He felt something and quickly untouched the Prince like he was some burning flame, not understanding what that something was.
Then he swallowed as he became self conscious of how breath taking the man was before him.
"What's wrong Phai?"
Hephaistion just shook his head with eyes warding off considerably. "Leave it. Why have you chosen now, to stare off into nothing, in the middle of a battle? You can do that during your father's meetings or Aristotle's lectures but not now. You know better." He went back on topic, mostly just to cover up his own confusion.
"I was thinking." Alexander said.
"Your thoughts will kill you one day." Hephaistion stated.
"You know, this could be us one day?"
They both stopped and looked around at the now well rested bodies of the dead.
"It could be us, today." Hephaistion retorted. "If you let your guard down. And if I get distracted by you letting your guard down."
"What if this does become us?" Alexander questioned with testing eyes.
"I suppose we'll just be gone with no more life in us." The browned haired teen replied quite hastily.
"If we did die right here, right now, I would be side by side with you. That wouldn't seem so bad would it?" The prince shrugged. He was always in some dream like state or something of the sort. Hephaistion never quite understood that part of the Prince yet, not to mention his lack of urgency.
"You weren't much of a romantic Alexander." Hephaistion said looking back at the man he had just laid to rest. "No one wants this."
"Death happens."
"You're right. But I get the feeling that our death will be much more tragic."
The prince's eyes narrowed in response towards his friend's sudden unhappiness. "Why do you think of these things Hephaistion? It only makes you sad."
Hephaistion slowly lifted his grieving eyes toward his pale haired friend. "Death is the only thing certain in life therefore life gives me no other choice. That's why I think about it."
"You shouldn't fear death, Phai."
"I don't fear death. Not for myself. But for you." He regarded. "You love being in battle. It's when you come alive. I don't like that."
"I enjoy glory, I admit." The Prince innocently confessed.
"You enjoy an expensive funeral." Hephaistion scoffed.
"Well if that's your worry I'll make sure your funeral is much more expensive than mine." The prince joked trying to lighten the mood but Hephaistion was much more serious than even his mother at times.
The boy didn't respond and just stared at Alexander who stared at him back, standing and looking like some champion gladiator covered in blood and grime.
"I don't enjoy killing Hephaistion. When I take a life the freeing of a soul is the glory I seek, always. It's liberating to think that one can finally part from this world. This world of tragedy and death like you say. They can live finally…when everything ends." Alexander explained in a way only he knew how.
Hephaistion sighed. "Not everyone has your same heart Alexander. Not everyone is as noble. Your enemies are going to want you dead not because they wish to free you but because they hate you." The browned haired teen then forced his infused eyes to drift away from his Prince. They were soaked with much more than just concern.
"My mother often says those that avoid another mans eyes are intimidated. She also said the reason for it is because often they are left speechless when afraid or nervous."
Hephaistion glared hard at Alexander for stating the obvious and for quoting his devil mother. "Taking your mothers advice is no different from taking advice from a talking serpent. Though she may be right, her agenda is not to educate."
"Are you nervous for me Hephaistion?" Alexander asked with a peaceful smile.
Hephaistion just nodded, answering visibly.
"Why?" His golden eyes squinted in knowing.
"Because you are the Prince, Alexander!" Hephaistion abruptly spoke. "Soon you will be the King. And then I will have nothing. I will be without you whether death comes to you or not. Let's not forget that you are my only friend. That's my constant worry, everyday. Losing the only person I care about in this world."
The browned haired teen instantly regretted that confession. Alexander only knew parts of him. Not everything.
"I'll always be there for you. We'll always have each other. I would remember you even after the last breath leaves my body." Alexander said as he lifted his hand about to touch his friends cheek, but realized his touch might scare him noticing how quickly he jumped from him last time. Then he backed away, knowing that Hephaistion had limitations.
"You say that now." Then tears started to build up in the cerulean eyes, though he was doing a good job keeping them from falling. "But what if your life gets taken before your last breath?"
Alexander shook his head. "Not likely. You're suggesting that someone has the nerve to steal from you. Phai, my life has already been taken."
"Is that so?"
"Yes." The prince blinked in assurance.
"By who?"
"By you." Alexander replied penetratingly. "And it's not at all a bad thing."
The brunette chuckled carelessly. "I don't understand."
"I have this self-interest in you, Phai." The blonde teen stepped closer to his friend with a lusting but adoring glaze in his eyes.
"What?" Hephaistion questioned softly as his eyebrows creased with built confusion.
"At this moment I'm not your prince. I'm certainly not your king. Right now, I'm just some common boy, some random soldier in the Kings army who will ask you to be mine."
And with that a small silent gasp escaped Hephaistion. The brunette couldn't understand what was happening. Well, he did, but he was in a fight with his own denial therefore making it easier to reject Alexander's sincerity. It was just easier to not take him seriously. "You want me to be yours?"
"Yes." The golden haired teen smirked. "I want you to be mine."
Overwhelmed immediately after the Prince's tender but thrilling gesture Hephaistion quickly and noticeably avoided his eye contact, averting his attention towards the ground. He tried to hide his blush and shyness and felt thankful for his full head of hair at the moment. He didn't know how to respond and ended up responding in the worst way possible. "In our dreams Alexander. Just our dreams."
"Some dreams come true. Mine do. Quite often, actually."
Hephaistion turned away faint in his thoughts wanting this moment to be real, but at the same time hoping Alexander was talking just a bunch of nonsense so that the wonderful tight feeling happening in his throat and chest would go away. But his attempt at hiding was no match for the Prince. No one was a match for him.
"Why do you still fear me?"
Their eyes had finally met. And Hephaistion's heart started to race. "Alex…I don't fear you. I fear for you. I knew once I got in too deep, if I allowed myself to feel for you the way I did, the way I do now, that you would be the death of me. And that I'd be the death of you and there is nothing I fear more than the loss of my Alexander. And now look where we are, in a field of death, typically where men like us fade and now I have to deal with you asking me to be yours, the one thing I fought so hard against. If I lost you as just a friend, that's one thing, if I lost you as my soulmate, that's everything."
The prince smirked. "I've always found it a bad omen to turn away from fortune or to fend off fate. If what you say is true and you are my death, why can't you just allow me to be your life?"
"Right now?" Hephaistion timidly asked.
"Yes." The Prince answered bravely despite a possible rejection.
"Are you sure you are being serious?"
"I am. I've been serious about you since the day we've met."
"So this isn't some practical joke you and the other boys thought of?"
The Prince shook his head lovingly, his blonde bangs waving across his face. "I want you Hephaistion. I'm not like the others."
"Can we discuss this later?" He quickly and nervously cleared his throat.
"Why?"
"Because I don't know what I'm feeling right now."
"What if there is no later for us?"
"Now you're just making this hard for me on purpose."
"Am I making you nervous?"
He nodded, then quickly shook his head, frustrated with his mixed emotions. "No, it's just that the battle isn't over."
"Phai?"
"The soldiers are ahead and they'll wonder where we went if we don't keep up. Not to mention you're supposed to be leading them."
"Phai?"
"We should go. You must reclaim your victory before it is stolen by your father. And that gash on your head needs to be looked at immediately."
The blonde smiled like he never smiled before as he watched his friend in a panic hurry away. "Your excuses are adorable you know. It makes me love you even more."
Then Hephaistion stopped in his tracks his body forgetting how to react, move. He could hardly feel himself breathing as he faced Alexander slowly, hie eyes attentive and his mind buzzing. And now the Prince had his full attention.
"Remember what Aristotle had told us? He believes that there is logic and reason for why we feel this way about another human. But sometimes I think he's wrong. Sometimes I question his judgment. Looking at you, feeling you is something I can not explain. My father once told me that love can be so strong and that's why you can't touch it because it will destroy you if it could. It's such a nonrepresentational belief beyond our understanding. One day we will never get this chance because it will never be made official. And that's why I'm doing this now because you're right Phai, we don't live forever and if it can't be represented in the world's eye, it will in ours. And when I do become king, if I do, I'm going to have to make choices that I don't want to make. Choices that will upset you. Choices I will end up hating myself for. Things unforgiving. And I just need you to know that whatever happens in our future together, if I become king, when I do, that I may change for the worst. You may wake up one day and not even recognize me. There is no telling now. So I want to take your hand and make you mine now so that when I do become someone else, when I do become unrecognizable, that you have proof that you still belong to me, this Alexander standing right here before you. No matter what happens or when everything ends, I will always be the Alexander who remembers that from nothing, you were there. There were no signs from the gods, telling me you were coming. I used to believe that the world was infinite and it only made my cause stronger. I told myself that I would conquer the endless lands ahead and that I would never stop. But then I met you and reality was no longer an illusory and I knew I found the one person who would slow me down once I started. I found my end and it started with you. And though you did not like me at first sight, with your judging eyes and disdain, I knew we were going to be inseparable as either companions or as enemies. I would have been okay with both. Either way we were one in the same. Either way you are my better half. My moon. Our death may be tragic but just know that it doesn't matter who goes first, when we die, we die together. When we bleed, we bleed the same. You don't have to worry about dying alone, because I'm going to be there right next to you. I'm going to follow right after. I promise that. Before we even spoke words, before I even knew your name, I knew my fate. I accepted it. I knew I would die of a broken heart. I would weep until I was sick and desiccated from the amount of tears lost. But I also knew that I would be free of misery and nothing else would matter. You were made for me. Just for me. As my own. If there wasn't Hephaistion, there would be no Alexander. If there wasn't Hephaistion there would be nothing."
He anxiously watched as Alexander slipped an old ring from his ring finger, one he found in Pella. The jewel wasn't anything special, it wasn't made of solid gold or anything luxurious. So it was a wonder why the Prince had kept it. But to him it wasn't just some plain ring. It was a ring that could one day mean so much.
After admiring the silver ancient sphere, Alexander leaned in close, reaching for Hephaistion's hand with a reserved gaze as if he was the only one who mattered in his world. "Once I put this ring on your finger, you're mine. Once I kiss you, you're mine forever. So, my Hephaistion, do you want this?" His future lover whispered as he lifted his devoted eyes to him.
"Yes, my Alexander. I want this." He whispered back as blue eyes lifted with the same devotion, the same fondness, the same desire.
Tears began making their way down the handsome face as he watched the young Prince slide the non traditional ring on his finger. "I love you Hephaistion and the more time goes by, I will love you even more. And I vow to love you for the rest of our endless life."
Hephaistion had the largest, most content grin on his face. He couldn't hide it anymore. It just rose like the sun from the earth. He was just so caught up. Caught up in the moment, caught up with his beautiful Alexander.
"Are you ready?"
"For what?"
"For when I take your breath away?"
Hephaistion nodded sweetly and Alexander leaned in to kiss his lover.
When their lips touched, and when their eyes had closed, everything and everyone around them exploded into ash.
...
Grey eyes, as grey as heavy rain shoot open and the man who possesses them sucks in a breath as if his soul was stolen. His lips detach from the magnificent King before him and light drops of silver ash slip from his long lashes as he slowly blinks.
Incompatible eyes of the King are reddish gold like a flame being lit. It becomes reviving and cosmic as his lips curl in a grin. Still in his battle gear he removes his shield and his battle worn sword letting it fall onto the ground that is layered evenly in ash and blood...The steel dropping heavily but silently. Then he flushes his red cape out of the way as he makes a royal bow to his lover. The cloth strikes the ash causing it to rupture as gravity lifts it. His gaze remaining locked with his blue eyed partner.
They were reunited, in a field, in a slower downed life, where hearts no longer ached.
The golden king slips closer to the brunette, sliding his hand up the lean strapping back keeping a sensual hold on him. The brunette then glides thin fingers up towards his king's soft neck. And now their free hands finally entwine like a rose and its vine.
"This is it Phai. This is us restarting. This is what we died for. This is our battle finally ended. This is our eternal dance."
Ashes flutter like dust as they allow their first strut. They suck it in and their lungs are eradicated and swarmed by the toxins of passion spreading in the air of the Elysian Fields. They dance together in this delicate and hushed afterlife. Where their bones won't grow weak and their love won't expire.
The radiating connection of heat from their touching bodies, burn deeply. Light sweat, heavy blood and thick tears glide down their skin from the ones who were their before. They move in sync as two different bodies but one soul. The blonde leading, sophistication to his every move, securing his partner. Never a forced movement. And the brunette follows effortlessly, his coat of hair releasing like an opened drape and crashing like heavy waves as it rises and falls against his shoulders.
The king runs vigorous but loose hands, the feeling like silky fluid, down his partners chest. He tightens a fistful of his lover's uncontrolled hair around his hand, carefully pulls his head back and takes hungry teeth to the exposed veins at his neck, growling like a lion in lust, licking and sucking away at the taste of his pure skin. His general closes his eyes as the vibration shocks his internal soul and grasps the King tight by his powerful arms.
With each step. With each stroke. The dance becomes more and more liberating as they travel with graceful aggression...more sensual.
He pulls his King in closer until the space between them was voided. His chest pressing against the hard gold armor. Both hands wrapping around his neck. And the blue eyed man smiles as he makes an eloquent thrust against his lovers groin that causes a catastrophe in his kings heart. The blonde King hisses. All senses melt from him and he is stunned as his general's lips awake into a smirk against his roughened cheek. Their skin stings in a wanted uproar and their bodies mold together as they hold each other close. Love didn't exist like theirs.
Pacing continuously through the unseen soil of the field, the new moon shines beautifully on them. It being their spotlight. The song being their heartbeats. The rhythm being their breath.
Then the King binds him, seizing his lovers wrists with two strong grips and pulls them down at his side. They stare into each other. Things become hushed. Things become slow. Then their mouths clash as time washes away. Their lips are burning. Their tongues are feral. Their breaths depraved. Their hands in sync. Their pulses rupturing.
And everything grew fainter and fainter...until they were back again. Until they were sucked back into life.
...
With their lips breaking apart and their bodies dividing, they separated from the intensity of the kiss, looking like they shouldn't have done that but exhaling deeply like they wanted more.
Sapphire eyes of his future general gleaming as if possessed by a trance and tinted eyes of his future King infected with a longing.
The time absent had slithered its way back in place. In a slow instance reality appeared. And the two friends, the two lovers, were gradually swamped with the sound of cheers and sobs. Things were adjusted. Things were as they were. They were no longer together and alone in the Elysian Fields where they were happily departed.
Transfixed by the Prince and the way the blonde made him feel, Hephaistion's lashes flickered heavily, the pools of his eyes tense with bewilderment as he watched Alexander who was now viewing there present setting.
The victors lifted their flag high, signaling the end of the revolution and a light wind blew through the town as if sent to answer for the lives lost.
Alexander smiled sadly as he turned back to his entranced lover who had eyes fixed on him since they broke the mystic kiss, like he needed an explanation...like he craved another escape. But Alexander offered no explanation, reached for the brunette's hand instead, knowing a simple touch would calm him. And as he held his hand tighter, Hephaistion felt his entire body relax and his heart settle in approval though words were still lost from him. Broken lips parted as if the wanted to say something but ended up saying nothing at all. The prince cocked his head to the side focusing and trying to comprehend his new lover's emotions, then smiled as tender as a royal warrior was able. "We shall mourn the men who have fallen this day but not for too long, for this was their love story. They had made a vow before they entered this battle. This wasn't a defeat. This was their victory. For them death didn't seem so bad. Perish miserably all who believe these men suffered disgracefully." The young Prince whispered a small prayer to all the lovers dead. "May they shine bright in the fields of Elysian."
The two young teens stood in silence, side by side, as they looked towards the bleeding spears of the Phalanx facing 300 dead lovers. They no longer felt a sadness. They felt at peace.
Hephaistion looked down at their bloody and impure hands laced in an affectionate grip.
"I can't wait." He whispered, tenderly laying his head upon his lovers shoulder.
"For what?" Alexander softly spoke as he lowered his mouth so that his lips may rest atop his lovers head.
"When everything ends..."
He felt the blonde smile upon him. "I love you Hephaistion."
"I love you to Alexander."
A moment went by...and their eyes had begun to shut, their bodies begging to rest...then just like that, there world fell away, back to the frigid blackness of Elysian where they vowed to dance for the rest of there endless life.