Summary: its like walking down a road with no signs, no markers, no clear path. They're blinded and tired, restless and anxious. The only risk is insanity. Where are they headed now?
Where Are We?
A Road with no End
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She walked down the road, catching dust on her shoes as she passed. Where was she even going? Was there even a reason as to why she left the house?
Where was she headed?
She could feel the haziness grab her, catching her by the throat and pulling her down an invisible lake— no, sea of oppressing anxiety and uneasiness.
Where did they go wrong?
She cringed seeing them together, knowing it was her fault for bringing the two to where they were now— married.
She hated it.
She despised it.
And she cried at it.
She had no right to love him, no right to deny him.
So she would pair him with another, someone better than her, someone more kind-hearted than her. Someone the exact opposite of her.
And the result of her actions crippled him— turned him into someone he wasn't. He was no longer the happy man he was, carefree to do what he wanted. He was no longer that energetic boy that jumped at the thought of being with company. No, he secluded himself in work, immersed himself in pain that only he would bear.
And she wanted to help him. She wanted to be there to support him.
But it wasn't in her place.
So she cried, holding onto her disgusting, vile feelings for this once wonderful man. She had no right to; she had no right to do anything.
Because she was disgusting.
She was mean, nasty, malicious, disgusting, and ugly.
But he would always tell her otherwise. And at those times, she truly felt her feelings for him quiver. They would come knocking on the door in a sing-song voice saying "He~y! Come out to Pla~y."
And feeling her resolve crack under those simple words of "You're you, don't you ever go and change" killed her emotionally.
What was happening to her?
After several years of their marriage (the other two) she secluded herself from them, immersing herself in her own marriage with a man who cared nothing for her. He left from months on end and only came back for approximately two days before leaving again, not even asking her how she was coping.
And she was not coping well. She was dying emotionally and physically.
Until she collapsed under all of her loneliness and despair onto the dirt road, hazily seeing the dark figures crowd around her.
Ah, had death come to take her?
She held out her hand to the bright sky and welcomed it.
When did the road become so twisted?
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He sat at his desk shuffling through papers that needed to be signed. Every day was routine and every day was boring.
What was he doing with himself?
He loved his job— sure, but he never understood the standing that it put him in. He wasn't allowed to goof off, wasn't allowed to go home early, wasn't allowed to hang out with friends. It made him wonder what exactly was so great about this position.
And then he remembered when he walked into town, watching the ecstatic villagers smile and applaud him when he came about.
He was protecting these people, and they in turn loved him.
He was acknowledged.
But at what price did he have to pay?
His mind wandered as he looked out the window, instantly noticing pink from the corner of his eye.
It was her. His first love.
He had loved her from a young age, instantly noticing her bright pastel pink hair and uniquely large forehead from the corner of the classroom. She was captivating, charming, and beautiful. It was a wonder why those revolting beasts picked on her for her beautifully striking features.
About a couple months later, she became friends with the blonde girl in class known for her proud personality. Because of her, the rosette was able to buck up and become more confident in herself.
Once, just once did he want to come up to her and introduce himself personally to her. He wanted to say how beautiful he thought she was, how wonderful he thought she was, how amazing he thought she was. But he was too much of a coward to do so.
So he stuck to sitting behind her and watching her smile fondly at the dark-haired boy known for his handsomeness.
he remembered the pain they went through to bring back that boy, his best friend, his brother, from his despair. He remembered the tears that she shed for him, those tears that shouldn't have been shed for him, that should have never been shed, those tears that should have been shed only in times of happiness.
But they only descended in pain, in agony, in remorse.
He didn't deserve her. He made her sob uncontrollably, made her weep endlessly.
He could have been better for her. He could have made her happier.
That was what he thought until he saw their interaction after the war.
His "Brother" who showed his awkward sign of affection and his love blushing uncontrollably.
Hate and anger welled up inside him.
But they became baseless when he realized how happy she was with him, how after all their hard work they were able to bring him back.
She deserved to be happy, be happy with him.
So he would stay out of the way, move away from the two of them.
It was heartache when she tried to pair him up with another, actually believing that God was plotting against him.
First he let his love go, now that love had to move him to another.
It was agony.
His heart stopped beating, he could feel it going cold— slowly, yet surely.
Yes, he had noticed this girl's feelings for him long ago when she had confessed, but chose not to do anything for fear of hurting her, and for fear of getting rejected and scolded by his love. Now, being faced with this dilemma, he didn't know what to do. He didn't want to move forward, yet he didn't want to move backward.
He thought at that point, it was his downfall.
The events that came after were hazy. He couldn't remember how he got married, or why he even decided to getting married.
He was lost down a path with no end, a path that would only bring him more pain.
Where was he again? What part of the road was he on?
Why did he let her go? Why didn't he tell her how he felt? Why didn't she love him?
Why was he even here?
And his thoughts disappeared when he saw her collapse on the dirt road, his beloved villagers crowding around her as she layed there unconscious.
And then his heart hitched.
It began to pump again, after so many years.
And this is where their story begins.
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He shunshined to her side, picking her up from her frail and defenceless state on the ground. The villagers cried for the beloved pink-haired doctor and asked him if she would be okay. Everyone in town loved her,— sure, she was known to have a bad temper and throw sharp objects in her tantrums even punch and kick, but she was passionate and caring. A woman that many viewed with love and compassion.
He looked down at the elderly and children and at the young men and middle aged woman. "She will be fine, I will see to it" before disappearing in the speed of light.
He entered the hospital with haste, directly going to the old blonde medic that ran the hospital side by side with the woman in her arms.
"Baa-chan," He began before being cut off from the blonde woman. She hustled over and inspected the woman in his arms.
"Put her on the bed in room 236." She replied before taking her equipment to follow him as he teleported first.
He put her down on the mattress and pulled away a stray lock from her face but not before he rubbed his thumb over the small diamond on her forehead. His brows furrowed as he looked at the woman in distress below him.
He stood by the bed as the blonde doctor took care of the pastel-pink haired woman, glancing over her shoulder to see what she was doing to his childhood love.
After checking her for a couple minutes, the doctor put her equipment on the counter in the corner of the room and looked at him.
"Has Sasuke come back recently?" She inquired at him.
"No." He furrowed his brows and looked at the ground beneath him. "He hasn't been back for six months…" his voice trailed off in irritation.
The blonde sighed and tucked her patient into bed. "It's most likely stress. Probably from Sasuke not coming home to see her. She's most likely lonely from being home alone as well as tired from overworking in the hospital."
"Baa-chan, let her take a week off." He ordered.
"I was planning on it even without you asking. She's done so much in too little time."
His gaze drifted back to the woman in bed and he nodded. "That sounds good."
She looked at him and pat his back, giving him reassurance. "Go back to work. We can handle it from here."
"Yes." and with that he shunshined back to his office, but not before thinking one last time about her, his first, and last, love.
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She awoke the next morning, seeing warm hazel eyes gazing at her, and she smiled when she realized who they belonged to. "Hello shishou."
"Sakura, how are you feeling?" The woman inquired.
"Well. Where am I?"
"The hospital. You were brought in by Naruto." She looked over at her shoulder to see some slight reaction from the woman.
She didn't miss it.
The rosette flinched and turned her head to the window, gazing outside she presumed. "A-Ah… Hokage-sama?"
The blonde never understood why her student called him "Hokage-sama." Sure, they were now of different status, but their friendship shouldn't have changed, so calling him "Hokage-sama" seemed like a stretch.
But she understood the reason for it.
Her student was in love with the blond haired Hokage and she wanted to suppress her feelings for him.
What a mess the two had gotten themselves into.
"Sakura," she began, trying to choose her words carefully, "are you okay? If you have anything you want to say to me, I'm all ears."
She couldn't say anymore or her sharp student would suspect her and distance herself away from her as well. She didn't want that. She wanted to help her, ease her pain.
Release her chained heart.
But the woman smiled back at her and shook her head. "Nope, I'm perfectly fine, shishou."
But that smile was as fake as her facade.
The woman was breaking apart from the inside out.
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She layed in bed and wondered how he had found her, how he had seen her, how he had detected her. After all, she was well away from the hokage building.
Yet he was able to see her.
How?
A small tug pulled in her chest and she could feel the happiness tug at the chains, threatening to release her chained heart from the depths of darkness.
But she waved it aside.
That was not going to happen. She was going to keep this secret for the rest of her life, to the grave that she would be buried in. Even if she died early.
She would stay to her word and keep away from the light.
Because she was already dead and no amount of happiness would save her.
After all, how can you bring back the dead?
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A/N: Sorry this was boring but I wanted to write this. It's short so that should be okay. Also, if there are mistakes, I'm sorry. I'm only human. I'm prone to mistakes...
You probably hate it but that's fine. Hate it. Hate me.
I will write again soon. Thank you for your time and eyes.
Until next time.