Written By: Kassie King
Title: As the World Around Them Changes
Category: Romance/Drama
Rated: T
Summary: She couldn't believe she had given him the option to say no. There was just too much question in his eyes to be sure if he wanted her or not. She had put herself in such a vulnerable state. DJ
As Joey stepped into the clean and crisp apartment she inhaled the sweet air of Capeside. She had finally managed to move back. It was funny how you could wait your whole life to get away from your hometown only to find that you deeply miss your roots. She felt Pacey's arms snake around her waist and smile into her neck. She turned around facing him smiling. He kissed her lips softly and set down her heavy bag on the desk set by the wall.
Pacey had been the one to convince her to move home after college. He had been the one that convinced her to move in with him. The windows were dressed in the drapes she had picked out a while ago. Of course he had protested in his stubborn Pacey ways, but Joey had won out.
Pacey had his lips on her neck now and he was pushing her towards their bed. She let him lay her down, but she stopped there sitting up. He rolled his eyes as she reached for her travel bag that contained all of her clothes. He grabbed the bag from her hands and kissed her on the lips soft and sweet.
"Uh-uh nope" she mumbled into his lips smiling.
"Come on Jo," he coaxed.
"Pacey, I have to unpack." She whined.
"Fine. I'll help. The faster we get this done the faster we can get back to our… previous engagements."
She rolled her eyes and pushed him off of her. She unzipped Bessie's old bag that she had stolen from her when she started college. She pulled out some of her old tee shirts and began to unpack them into her drawers. She found her hanging bags and pulled out her only good dress to hang in the closet.
"Hey Jo, is this mine?" Pacey asked her. He was holding up a large navy long sleeved shirt.
"Uh no it's not." She mumbled fiddling with the hanger in their closet.
"Whose is it?"
"Mine." She mumbled.
"Since when do you wear an XL mens?"
"Pacey just drop it ok? It doesn't matter"
"It does matter Jo. If this belongs to some other guy I am fit to assume things."
"Pacey, it doesn't belong to some other guy okay? It's probably just Dawson's"
"When was the last time you saw Dawson?"
"The last time I saw Dawson was the last time you saw Dawson."
"Well then why do you have his shirts laying around?"
"Pacey we were best friends for years of course I have some of his things lying around."
"How much is some?" his anger was starting to show a bit.
"Not a ton Pacey. Just move on."
"I'll move on when you move on."
"What?"
"When you get over Dawson I'll get over you wanting him."
"I am over Dawson alright Pacey? Why do you think I'm standing here with you a year after he left for LA?"
"Because you made the easy decision. You didn't feel like working for it anymore you just wanted something respectable and easy and once again I am standing here having the same argument with you!"
"We don't have to have this argument if you would just let it go! You just keep bringing Dawson up!"
"I bring him up because you don't want to be here. You would much rather be gallivanting off to Hollywood with your life long soul mate."
"That's not true! Listen to yourself Pacey. I love Capeside. I want to be here."
"Joey the sooner you realize it doesn't matter where you wanna be it only matters who you want to be with then this wheel might turn a little faster."
"Calm down."
"What else do you have of his?"
"Pardon?"
"I mean what other old trophies have you kept of him."
"Not a lot."
"Not a lot? How much is that?"
"Pacey! You really want to know? I have a few of his old t-shirts that I sleep in because they are huge and comfy. I have a few of his movies that he gave to me as kids so I could watch them at home with Bessie. I have his old necklace he gave me after the second time we broke up and I have…"
"You have?"
"I have nothing else I ran out of stuff."
Pacey turned away from her and rested his head in his hands. He sighed and lay down. She looked at him and gave him a sorry look. She didn't quite understand why it was such a big deal. Pacey knew she was friends with Dawson, but gosh she hadn't seen the guy in two years. She couldn't look at him in the eye really. There was something strange about knowing a person for a really long time and knowing they could know exactly what you were thinking if you let your guard down. And Joey didn't want anyone to know what she was feeling…
"Just tell me his stuff being here means nothing." Pacey said.
"Pacey, really you are being a complete idiot ok? This is dumb."
"Tell me Joey!" he said standing up. She turned away from him.
"I can't…" she trailed off.
"Why?"
"Because it's quite possible that those items do mean something in some strange way."
"Jo, don't get all over-analytical on me just tell me if you still have feelings for Dawson."
"Pacey I will always have feelings for Dawson! If you just can't move on and except that I may love you, but I will always love him as well then we are back at square one."
"Joey would you stop giving me these avoidance little answers!"
"If you would stop to think of what they mean then they wouldn't seem to be so avoiding!" she snapped.
"Well what do they mean?"
"Use your brain Pacey I know it's sloshing around up there somewhere! I still love Dawson and I always will, but I love you too."
"That's not an option."
"Then I suppose I won't answer the question."
"Then I suppose you should leave my apartment."
"You sound like a four year old!"
"I feel like we've been having this conversation since we were four-year olds."
"Do you honestly want me to leave?"
"No, just stay here. I'm sorry, I'll drop it."
"Yes well, I'm going to go take a walk."
"Where to?"
"I don't know, I'm back in Capeside I wanna take a look."
"Do you want me to come?"
"No, not right now."
As Joey exited the building she pulled out her cell phone. Capeside looked the same and felt the same except for one thing- Dawson. Without him here things changed. They weren't nearly as she remembered. However if she had learned one thing from college it was that things aren't always what they seem.
She punched in the number of Dawson's LA apartment and it ringed several times before going to answering machine: Hey, It's Dawson. If this is about the deadline for the next show Larry I know I'll make it I just need a little inspiration. If this call is urgent call my cell- I should have it with me. She should have known Dawson wouldn't be sitting in his apartment on a Saturday night.
She wandered around a bit before deciding to go to her old creek dock. She settled in and watched the ripples in the water. Behind her was the Leery household; well not really anymore. Not since Mr. Leery passed, but Joey would never get over calling it that. The ladder was still there, almost inviting her in. Even though she knew that no one was home and that it would be extremely sad she decided to ascend that ladder into Dawson's room. The first thing she saw when she looked through the room was the E.T. poster in the back of the room. The second thing she noticed was Dawson himself sitting on his bed.
"Dawson?" she asked pulling herself through the window like she had done 2 years previous.
"Jo? What are you doing here?"
"Oh, uh well, hmm"
"Just find the need to climb through my window?"
"Pretty much" she laughed and sat beside him.
He pulled her into a hug and she realized just how much she had missed this feeling of comfort. She realized how much pain could be taken away through his touch. He stroked her hair quickly before pulling away sighing.
"So what are you doing back in Capeside?" she asked him.
"Well the show is starting to veer off track and I decided to come home and get a little of that old magic back"
"Oh! Thus the phone message to Larry."
"Yes, thus the phone message to Larry. So what are you doing back in Capeside?"
"Well you know, Pacey asked me to move in with him and I thought I would, but now I think I might be reconsidering that."
"Why?"
"Because he freaked out on me"
"About what?"
"You."
"Me?"
"Well, more he freaked out about your stuff."
"Still not following."
"He was helping me unpack and he found an old shirt of yours and he started yelling about it"
Dawson smiled to himself at the thought that Joey hadn't completely let go yet. He was of course not over her yet, but he had decided if she could let go then, he in turn would as well. It was hard for him to see her here because even though he had wished he would see her he was not expecting. Then, there was the whole other topic of her moving in with Pacey.
"So, are you going back to him?"
"For good or for tonight?"
"Either?"
"Oh well tonight probably not; I'll stay at the B&B, but for good it depends."
"You're going to end a two year relationship over a fight about my shirt?"
"No Dawson, I'm going to end a relationship that never really started with Pacey about his overreaction of such a minor thing and his inability to get over the fact that I will always…" she trailed off into the oblivion.
"Always what Jo?"
"Always love you"
"Jo, hasn't that been established? I mean I know I'll always love you"
"Dawson, do you ever think the edges haze a bit."
"What?"
"The limitations of that love. I mean does love define friendship or romance."
"Definitions are overrated."
"Not to Pacey"
"Jo, if you're asking if I love you or if I'm in love with you then I don't know."
"You don't?"
She couldn't believe she had given him the option to say no. There was just too much question in his eyes to be sure if he wanted her or not. She had put herself in such a vulnerable state. He could see the vulnerable state, but he didn't know which way to go. If he gave in to everything he was feeling surely he would lose what little of Pacey he had left. If he didn't give in he could lose what little of Joey he had left. Joey started to lean in to kiss him, but he stopped her.
"What?" she asked.
"Jo, what do you want?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean this is the last time we will ever have this conversation once you answer, but I need to know; who do you want to be with. I swear Jo I will always be here for you; I couldn't lose another friend, not after Jen. So honestly answer is it me or Pacey?"
Joey felt her world stop turning. She felt her lungs sharp intake of breath. She felt winded. She felt tired. She needed to lie down… to sleep. She needed to… all thoughts of what she needed escaped her head as she beside herself muttered on little word:
"You"
Dawson's reaction was immediate; pulling her into him fiercely and kissing her harsh and passionate. She kissed him back to the best of her ability, remembering the feel of his lips on hers. She would never forget that feeling of odd fulfillment and security. After all: they were meant to be.
He leaned her against the wall and she wrapped her hands around his neck. He caressed her neck with his tongue and hitting every nerve point imaginable. He dropped her to the bed. It was his old bed. It was old times and yet strangely it never would be again. Now it was different. They had to change. Or more they had to learn to stay the same while the world around them changed.
A/NAlright so hello everybody. What can I say I'm a sucker for quizzical endings. I know I kind of left out Pacey after his scene, but I write D/J because they are my favorite. I hope you liked it, please drop a review.