Disclaimer : I do not own anything, much to my great disappointment. I would however LOVE to own Robert Pattinson, if only for an hour lol.
Better When We're Together!
I stared into the early evening sky, the dark clouds passing the tree tops slowly. For the 1st time in weeks, I felt at peace, as though I could spend forever just laid here, perfectly content. Of course having him laid here with me, was what made this moment as perfect as it was. I would do anything for forever, so long as he was with me always, which was what he promised me every day.
It had been only a few days since the Volturi had left, after threatening to wipe out my entire family, my reason for living. But since then, moments alone with Edward had been few and far between. It had been decided that maybe a change of scenery was what the family needed, along with the fact that both Carlisle and Esme in particular were struggling to look the ages of which the people of Forks believed them to be. Since then, plans were slowly, well slowly for vampires, being put into place.
I had mixed feelings about leaving Forks, my Dad, Charlie was here, and though he was now passed the stage where he didn't expect regular visits from me, the idea of moving so far away from him scared me a little. Of course he had grown close to Sue Clearwater, who was doing a good job of looking after him, but moving away just felt so final. I didn't know when I would be able to visit again, and surely turning up on his doorstep a year from now, looking no different as I do now, would shock him slightly.
I had other slight apprehensions on moving away from Forks. Neither myself or my new husband looked a day older than 20 at the very most, yet we had a daughter who easily looked the age of 5. What would our new town think? Would we be able to exist there without raising too many suspicions.
It wasn't ever meant to be as hard as this. Before becoming a vampire, I had always imagined, moving around the country, putting myself through high school and college every few years would be easy, so long as I had Edward, but now, it all just seemed so complicated, and hard to imagine. Not at all the dream I had envisioned for myself and Edward.
"Bella, love. What's on your mind"? The soft velvety tone enquired from my side.
I knew it drove him insane not knowing what I was thinking, when he quite easily could hear everyone else's thoughts. Sometimes though, I was grateful that he couldn't. He hated that I worried, but more than that, hated that he couldn't prevent these worries. I had hoped, that with my new vampire life, worrying would be something of the past, I would be confident and at ease, but that unfortunately hadn't been the case.
Realizing he was waiting for my answer, patiently, letting me find the right words. I looked at him, and tried to force a smile on my face. Immediately I could see in his eyes that he hadn't bought my façade. I sighed gently and sat up. He might not have been able to read my mind, but he was definitely in tune with my physical expressions.
"I was just thinking about Charlie". I admitted, hoping he wouldn't push it further. He knew the idea of me leaving Charlie was something that bothered me, but wisely tried to steer clear of the subject.
"Bella, love. I know it's going to be hard, but I promise you, we can come back and visit as often as you like". He too sat up, and rubbed his hand up and down my back gently, almost as though he still thought of me as human.
"I know, but we can't keep doing it forever, at some point, someone is going to question why we don't look any older, and why Reneesme looks far older than she should. Even if Charlie chooses to ignore that part". I sighed. "I knew this would come Edward, but I really didn't think it would be this hard. I always imagined that I would be a crazed newborn, not even caring where we were".
He slowly lifted his free hand and placed it on my chin, guiding my head to turn and look at him. His eyes a golden brown were filled with guilt, and I knew immediately it was guilt over putting me in this situation, wishing he hadn't been selfish in wanting to keep me, but unable to regret. I leant into his embrace and let my lips softly meet his, then pulling back and leaning my forehead against his, gazing lovingly into his mesmerizing orbs.
"I swear to you, we will figure something out". He told me, and the conviction in his tone left no doubt in my mind.
I nodded once, before leaning further into him, hugging him tightly to me. I immediately felt awful for ruining our 1st relatively peaceful moment in such a long time, with my worries. We hadn't even really had the time to enjoy being a married couple, everything had happened so fast. First the pregnancy, then Reneesme's traumatic arrival, my being turned into a vampire, then all the preparation for the onslaught of the Volturi, and then the battle. It had all been squashed into a few months, and the only respite we had, had been the 1st night of my being a vampire.
"Ugh, I'm sorry, I'm ruining this aren't I"? I pulled away slightly, looking away from him, biting on my lower lip.
"No". He replied simply, lifting my chin with his finger so he could read my thoughts through my eyes. "This is exactly why I brought you here to our meadow. I knew you needed to vent your worries away from the family".
I nodded gently, feeling guilty. Here he was, being as perfect as ever, wanting me to empty all my own worries onto him, when he probably had plenty of his own. I knew without a doubt, that I wasn't the only one to worry about our daughter. I wasn't the only one worried about leaving Forks.
"Bella, would you prefer if we stayed in Forks"? He asked. I looked at him questioningly.
"Carlisle and Esme"… I began, though unsure where I was headed.
"Would still leave. They have to, they have been here long enough, much longer and it's going to get suspicious". He interrupted.
"You've been here just as long as them". I told him.
"True, but I can manage to pull off a few more years. We could both sign up for Port Angeles community college, work our classes out around Reneesme, or just you, and I can stay home with her, let people think I work from home or something".
I was blown away by his suggestions. I couldn't believe he was willing to stay here with me, when his family moved who knows how many hundreds of miles away from us. He was seemingly happy to have this distance between us and 6 family members rather than force me to put the same distance between me and Charlie. When I thought of it like that, it was clear he was sacrificing far more than I could allow him. His family were now my family, and though I knew come the day we left, it would pain me to do so, I would do it.
"Have Carlisle and Esme decided where they're going yet"? I asked, overtaken with emotion. The old Bella would have had tears streaming down her cheeks well before now.
"Not yet, they've got a few options, but if we stay they'll stay as close to Forks as feasible, so that visits can be as regular as possible". He told me, but I could see he was hesitating in telling me something.
"But they've got a preference though right, where they'd like to go". I pushed for an answer.
"Alaska". He sighed. "It's just that they need to be far enough away that"… he began trying to explain, but I quickly cut him off with a kiss.
"I've never been to Alaska. I'm sure Alice will have a ball choosing me an Alaskan wardrobe out". I whispered whilst resting my forehead against his.
"You don't want to stay"? He asked, searching in my eyes for an answer.
"I would love more than anything to stay Edward". I began. "But we have to be practical". I added quickly before he could butt in. "There's little chance that Renee would visit here, but even less chance of her visiting Alaska. As for Charlie, he has Sue now, and he's sort of taken Seth under his wing too. I'll miss him for sure, but I can cope missing 1 person, but I don't think I can cope missing 6".
I could see him searching my expressions for any hint of a doubt, and I knew if he saw it, he would refuse to let us leave. However, I had never felt more confident about leaving. Maybe all I needed was some perspective on the situation, instead of thinking of what I was having to give up, rather than what I was gaining.
A soft beeping noise caught both of our attention. Edward let out a sigh, and reached into his pocket for his cell, trying his hardest not to move out of my embrace too much. Slowly whilst he focused on the text message he had received, I shuffled slightly so that his back leant on my chest and my legs wrapped around his waist. I began leaving a soft trail of kisses from his ear to his collarbone and back.
"That was Alice". He exhaled shakily. I immediately tensed thinking something was wrong with Reneesme. "She says and I quote 'Tell Bella thank you, thank you, thank you, we're going to have so much fun picking out your new wardrobe'". He told me chuckling softly to himself.
"Is it too late to change my mind"? I asked, laughing gently with him.
"It is never too late love". He told me seriously.
"We are going wherever your family go". I confirmed.
"Wherever 'our' family go". He corrected me, as he spun my wedding band around my finger in appreciation.
I too took a moment to appreciate the solid gold band on my left hand. Never in a million years did I think I would have been happy with a ring on my finger, with legal ties to another. But in all honesty, I fell in love with being Edwards wife more and more every day. Knowing that I belonged to him and he belonged to me in every way human and vampire way possible.
"You know I never thanked you for making me marry you". I whispered in his ear, as I began running my fingers over his wedding band.
"And I never thanked you for going through with it". He replied.
I wanted to tell him, that there was never any doubt, but then that would have been a lie. Of course I had never doubted spending my life, or now forever with him, I had however doubted the whole idea of marriage. I had been so scared, but thinking back now, I had no idea why. It baffled me, I wasn't scared of committing to spending the rest of my life with him, but I had been scared of making it a legal commitment. Strange. My human self, was definitely strange.
"Do you miss human Bella"? I asked suddenly.
"You are human Bella silly". He replied, twisting his head to look at me. "Your just less breakable now".
"No, I mean, you know, the Bella I was". I tried to clarify, but could see I wasn't getting anywhere.
"You are still the exact same Bella I fell in love with. No lack of heartbeat or mortality has changed that". He sat up and pulled me around into his lap.
"I mean like, I don't know. When I was human I could do stuff that I can't do now, like cry, and the falling over". I struggled, then saw him comprehend what I was meaning.
"I hate to break it to you love, but I honestly can't say I miss you being able to cry. Every time you would cry, it felt like if my heart was being ripped in two. The pain it caused me to see you hurting, there are just no words to describe it". He told me sincerely.
"So there's nothing you miss"? I asked incredulously.
"Everything that I could possibly miss has been replaced by something more amazing".
"Like what"? I asked curiously.
"Um, I miss your heartbeat. I would lie next to you every night whilst you slept, listening, but now, your already awake with me, and I get to gaze into your eyes instead. I miss you talking in your sleep, it was my way into your mind, your way of telling me your thoughts, dreams, desires and fears, but now I hope you'll tell me yourself. See my Bella, the few things you have lost have given us so much more now".
"So you don't miss my clumsiness"? I asked a playful smile on my lips.
"Definitely not". He told me, kissing me softly in between each word. "I will always worry about you, but in completely different ways than before. I feel at ease knowing I don't have to watch you like a hawk in case you trip down the stairs and break you legs. Now all I have to worry about is you realizing one day, that you could do so much better for yourself, than be with me".
"Never". I told him leaning forward and kissing him fiercely. "That will never happen. I promise to love you forever". I told him.
"I don't promise to love you forever". He replied softly, as I instinctively pulled back. "I swear to love you forever". He smirked at the panic that must have crossed my face.
"Isn't that out of a film"? I asked, hugging him tightly.
"I have no idea. But it kind of fit the moment don't you think"? He lolled back into the thick, lush grass, dragging me along with him.
He spooned me into his side, holding me tightly, my head resting on his shoulder. I couldn't help but think about what our lives may hold for us. Forever seemed a long time, but I knew even now, that it still wouldn't be long enough. Maybe people thought it impossible to want to spend 1 lifetime with 1 person, but I knew I would never have enough time with him.
"It seems right now, that all I've ever done in my life, is make my way here to you". Edward whispered suddenly.
"Ok, I know you stole that one from a film". I told him, though couldn't help but think how true it was.
"Which film then smarty pants". He teased.
"Bridges of Madison County". I retorted. For some reason the quote made me remember my Mom having a huge thing for Clint Eastwood a few years ago, right before she met Phil.
Lately, more of my human memories had been coming back to me, it took sometimes the smallest thing to trigger them. When I had consulted Carlisle, he had smiled proudly before telling me that it was another sign that I was finally coming out of the newborn stage, which I had never really fully been in.
"Ok, so how about this one"? Edward asked. "I would rather have had one breath of your hair, one kiss from your mouth, one touch of you hand, than eternity without you".
"Easy". I told him, and I could almost hear him smile. "City of Angels". I added proudly.
"Ok last one". He told me, then was quite for a few moments, obviously trying to think of one I wouldn't know. "I think I would miss you even if we never met".
"The Wedding Date". I answered without a pause.
"Ok, I think it's official, you are a chick flick fanatic". He teased.
"I have an excuse, what's your reason for knowing them all"?
"Easy". He mimicked my earlier answer. "I've lived for 50 years with Alice. I am truly surprised she hasn't actually made you sit down and watch any cheesy rom-coms with her yet. Poor Jazz, I've decided we've let him suffer enough, maybe you should take over for a few years, give the poor guy a break". He laughed. "What's your reason then"?
"I lived with Renee for 17 years, after every failed date, we'd sit at home with a tub of ice cream and all the other comfort food we had in the house, and watch, well it was usually 'An Officer and a Gentleman', whilst Renee wept that she'd never find a love like Zack and Paula's. But you can only"… I was interrupted by Edwards phone ringing.
"Alice". Edward spoke without even looking at the caller I.D.
"For that Edward Cullen, I am sentencing you, to another 50 years of watching 'chick flicks' with me, starting tonight with 27 dresses". I could hear Alice practically sing down the phone, followed by Emmett's boisterous laughter. "You too Emmett". She added before the phone went dead.
I couldn't help but laugh at Edwards pained expression. We both knew Alice would stay true to her word, at least for a few weeks, until she was given something else to occupy her mind. But try as I might, I couldn't get the image of Edward and Emmett sat on the sofa in the living room, with mud packs on their faces, and Alice sat giving them manicures and pedicures. I quickly forced my shield down allowing Edward to see my thoughts whilst I was still imagining him and his brother. Immediately on him picking up on my thought, he ploughed his weight into me, rolling us over so I was under him and playfully growled at me.
"Do not give her any ideas". His eyes blazed with, what looked a mixture of desire at our current position, with a hint of fear at the idea I had planted in his head. "If I'm going down, I'm taking you with me". He warned playfully.
"Is that a threat or a promise"? I whispered huskily, raising my perfectly shaped eyebrow at him.
He growled playfully again, before kissing me fiercely, as though kissing me was ridding himself of the images he had stolen from my mind. That will teach him for wanting in on my thoughts I thought mischievously. His kisses trailed away from my lips, along my jaw and to my neck, where he continued planting butterfly kisses. Suddenly he began humming a familiar tune. It wasn't my lullaby like it usually was, but something different. I wondered if it sounded familiar because he'd been playing it in the house, but then I realized he hadn't touched his piano in weeks.
"What's that song your humming"? I asked finally.
"MMM it's always better when we're together, Yeah, we'll look at the stars when we're together, Well, it's always better when we're together, Yeah, it's always better when we're together". He suddenly sang a few bars, his velvety tone curling perfectly around the lyrics.
I immediately recognised the song. It was a song that had been playing at our wedding, I had started off in Carlisle's arms, and he in Esme's, until half way through when we somehow managed to end up back in each others. The song had fit perfectly, although Carlisle was a good a dancer as Edward, probably better, it felt much better when we had were together.
"You really are pushing the boat out today aren't you, stealing quotes from movies, and other peoples songs, do you not love me enough to be original". I jokily teased.
"I wrote you a lullaby didn't I? What more could you want"? He teased back.
"Nothing, I have everything I will ever need right here". I declared, kissing him soundly on his soft lips.
"Anyone would think you're trying to get me into bed Mrs. Cullen". He laughed.
"Maybe I am. Is it working"?
"Most definitely". He announced, laughing between planting kisses on the corner of my mouth.
We lay in each others arms a little longer, every so often Edward would kiss my temple, and breathe in my scent. Even though his thirst for my blood was no longer there, he still told me I smelt flowery, and practically demanded I continued using my strawberry shampoo. And who was I to deny my husband his request, though of course now, he seemed to smell slightly of strawberry's since he felt the need almost everyday to help me in the shower, not that I was complaining.
Suddenly, I was aware of a spot of rain hitting the top of my head, and could sense a further heavy shower headed our way. Sighing, wishing the rain had stayed away a while longer so we could further enjoy the moment, I sat up, to find Edward already on his feet, holding his hand out toward me. Even with the rain, neither of us felt the need to rush, and we strolled hand in hand back through the forest, heading for home. We got there sooner than I would have liked, but remembering I had forever with him always eased the fact that our moment alone would be ending any second.
As we walked up the drive, I was surprised to find I couldn't hear any of our family making noise. Distracted I focused on trying to hear any sound coming from the big house, a slight panic rising through my body. I was just about to ask Edward, when I noticed he was leading me away, toward our own little secluded cottage.
"Reneesme"? I questioned, wondering why he seemed to have forgotten about our daughter.
"Everyone has gone out for the evening, the cinema I think. Carlisle and Esme offered to have Reneesme for the night so we could have some time together". Edward told me, stopping in front of me. "Personally I think it's any excuse to have her myself, but who was I to argue. I was offered a night alone with my beautiful wife". He told me, a small smirk appearing on his lips.
"So it's just us two… alone". I whispered seductively, wrapping my arms around his neck.
Impure thoughts immediately ran through my mind, as I was sure they were through his own. His grey t-shirt, soaked from the rain, clung to his chiselled chest, didn't help calm my thoughts any. It really should be illegal to look this damn good, especially when he should be looking dishevelled from the rain. His eyes blazed with desire, and I could hear a small growling begin to rumble in his chest. Teasingly I walked my index and middle finger up his chest until I hooked my finger around the collar of his t-shirt, pulling him down so we were level.
"Race ya". I said suddenly, giving him a gentle shove backwards before I set off running.
As I landed on the other side of the lake, I saw Edward swiftly over take me. His desperation to get back, obviously making it easier for him to push himself to his utmost limits. Never one to be outdone, once we were in sight of the cottage, I forced myself to think of our first night on our honeymoon, then quickly forced my shield down so he could get a good image of what I was thinking. I knew it would send him crazy, though it didn't stop him in his tracks like I imagined or hoped it would. I sped through the door, feeling a force grab me and practically throw me up against the wall.
"That… was… a… very… dirty… trick… Mrs… Cullen". He growled between kissing me fiercely, exactly the reaction I had wanted. He lifted me up onto his shoulder and began carrying me towards the bedroom. "For that, you shall be punished". He whispered seductively.
"Oh no, please what ever you do, don't punish me". I giggled.
No matter what happened next in our lives, nothing could stifle my love for Edward. Because when it really came down to it, things really were better when we were together.
MMM it's always better when we're together,
Yeah, we'll look at the stars when we're together,
Well, it's always better when we're together,
Yeah, it's always better when we're together