A/n: I wrote this real quick after seeing the music video for this. It was hilarious, and the song just sort of reminded me of Viktor and Hermione's 'relationship' Hope you enjoy it!!
Met a girl, thought she was grand
Fell in love, found out first hand
Went well for a week or two Then it all came unglued
She was always at the library, doing homework, studying, reading, thinking, whatever. She never knew that I would always stare at her when no one was around. I know she liked her quiet and that's why I hated it when those noisy girls would come and start giggling and trying to talk to me. When we got the announcement about the Yule Ball, I knew I wanted to go with her. The only problem was she was always surrounded by that Potter character and the red-headed boy. I knew if I didn't get to her quickly one of them would ask her.
It was a week before the Ball and I still haven't asked her. Finally I got up enough courage to talk to her. Imagine that, Viktor Krum trying to get up enough courage to ask a girl who was at least four years younger than myself. When she looked up at me with those brown eyes of hers and just spilled everything to her: how I would go to the library just to see her, how I was afraid that she was already taking, how she might reject me. She looked at me in shock before smiling her beautiful smile and saying she'd love to.
The Ball was a great success at first. She loved to dance and she had a wonderful personality. We talked about everything and every once in a while we would still be holding each other even after the song ended. Everything seemed perfect.
I could tell that she was thirsty so I offered to get us some drinks. She went over to a table were she said her friends were. After I came back with the butterbeers in hand (the best thing about Hogwarts) she was gone. I asked her friends and the red-head practically bit my head off. So I went to go find her, but she wasn't inside the Great Hall. I went out in the corridor and found her standing there muttering about how much he was an idiot. Who he was I have no idea.
"I can't believe that he said that. Jerk! He knows how much I care about Harry."
Harry? She cares about Harry? At first I was furious that she had feeling for Potter. Was she using me? Then I rationally came to the conclusion that she cares for him as a friend. I walked up to her and gave her a hug. She returned the hug and quickly pulled away. She took the butterbeer and thanked me. After she took a few deep breathes we went back inside and started dancing again. Only this time she seemed more distant, like something was on her mind. She didn?t want to talk about it and when I pushed her to tell me she about ripped my arm off. Soon, the night was over and I was glad. I didn't want to be with a moody witch all night. However, before I left she pulled me back and apologized to me. I was so surprised that I kissed her cheek before I realized what I was doing. Now, that might not seem like such a big deal, but to a book worm like herself it was a life altering situation. She smiled and walked away.
In a trap trip I can't grip Never thought I'd be the one who'd slip Then I started to realize I was living one big lie
Soon afterwards when I tried to meet up with her again at the library or anywhere else, she was with Potter and the red-head. I knew that the latter didn't like me, why? I have no idea, and the former had his own problems. He was busy preparing for the second task, as was I. Karkaroff already told me what it was without giving me a chance to figure it out all by myself. Oh well, less work for me I guess. Not that I'm trying to be shallow or anything, but honestly, I have other stuff to deal with. Like why a girl is ignoring me.
Every time I tried to ask Hermy-own— no wait, Herm-own-ninny, to accompany me to the village or to take a tour on the Durmstrang boat, she would always say she had something to do. When I would follow her to find out what she had to do...well, let's just say I started to hate Potter more and more. She was also hanging out with that red-head, too, but let's face it— he's no competition. I mean, after all, I am a World Famous Quidditch Player. Not that I shove that in people's faces or anything. Finally she realized that she was ignoring me and started to spend some time with me when her bodyguards weren't around. We talked about everything...well, actually, I was doing most of the talking. She didn't think I saw, but most of the time she would stare at my eyebrows or out the window and nod and smile. How did I know she wasn't paying attention.
"So when I didn't catch the snitch everyone voz angry. Can you believe that?"
"Mm hm," she nodded.
"What why?" I asked again.
"Mm hm," she nodded again.
"I'm leaving tomorrow," I started, looking at her face for a reaction.
"Mm hm"
"I'm going to haff my mother's baby," I said, positive that she would snap out of it, but nothing doing. Although, I distinctly heard a stifled giggle.
"Mm hm"
I knew that when she was with her friends she would stick up for me, but when she was with me she seemed to want to leave. Even when I tried to kiss her, she would turn her head and give me her cheek. Then she would get up and say she had some studying to do. One time when I was looking out of the window of the ship, I saw her and she was not studying. In fact she was racing towards that little cabin with Potter and Weasel (I learned his name later on) in tow. And by the looks of it they were coming from the village that I asked her to come with me too that day.
Nothing I did seemed to be right with that girl. There hundreds of other girls who are willing to be with me. Why am I stuck with this one?
And just when I thought it couldn't get worst it did.
She was queen for about an hour After that shit got sour She took all I ever had No sign of guilt No feeling of bad, no
After the Second Task when everyone found out she was the one I would miss most, people started to treat her like a...well a girl who is dating a famous Quidditch player. I thought she would be happy, ecstatic, even a little joyous, but the more attention she got the more sour she felt towards me. Whenever I tried to approach her she would turn right around and practically run the other way. I asked her to stay with me over the summer, but thanks to that evil reporter, Skeezer or whatever her name is, that doesn't seem too likely. Now everyone thinks that she dumped her old boy friend for me. Well, I got news for you people, he can have her back. So far I have been putting every effort into this non-existent relationship and she just seems to throw it all away. I'm starting to believe that she actually— do I dare say it— hates me!
She fuckin hates me Trust She fuckin hates me La la la love I tried too hard And she tore my feelings like I had none And ripped them away
The last day of school came and I would be going back home soon. Things cooled down between me and Hermy-own-ninny (although, I would have rather had them heat up), but she still never gave me an answer. For some reason, I really did see the red-headed Weasel as a threat. They never seem to be without the other. When Potter went into the maze I looked up and saw her sitting there biting her nails in worry. What a disgusting habit. Then I saw Weasel pull her hands out and comfort her. He dared touch my Ninny, as I affectionately called her, though in private since I never had a chance to call her that to her face. And I can't just call that out in the middle of the corridor because Lord knows she won't turn around to answer me. I went into that maze and after that night she never left her friends side. Only to go to the bathroom I suppose, but I will not chase after her in there. Weasel always seemed to be able to make both of them crack a smile when they were depressed. He would even tickle Ninny to get her to open up. And I knew she loved it.
When I approached her by the doors, Weasel immediately went red. He seemed to be fuming when we walked a little ways away. When I looked at her she was looking at the back of Weasel's head. Things were already a bit rocky between us when she found out how I cornered Potter and asked him about his relationship with her. She was so mad when she found out that Potter could have gotten killed that night, but seemed even more furious at the thought that something was going on between her and her friend. I apologized profusely after that, but she seemed even more distant than before.
So here I was about to ask her about my invitation to stay at my house, and she was staring at the red-head. I guess I had it all wrong. It wasn't Potter who was a threat, but the Weasel. I cleared my throat to get her attention and she jumped in surprise, as if just noticing I was there. I asked her if she considered my request for her to stay with me for the summer.
"Oh, Viktor," she said evenly, "I would love to, but right now I think my friends really need me. I hope you understand."
Understand?! Hell, no I didn't understand.
"I thought you had feelings for me," I said hoping to coax her into coming.
"I do, Viktor..." She likes me! I knew it. I mean, who can resist my charm, there's hope after all. "...as a friend." Its amazing how fast you can fall from a cloud and back to a dreary corridor of an old castle.
"W-what?" I must have misunderstood, not heard right or something, but the look on her face told me I had heard right.
"Viktor, considering the fact that I might never see you again I'm going to be completely honest." I felt myself go pale and a huge warning sign was shining in my head with a huge UH-OH. "You were pushy. You kept trying to kiss me when it was obvious I didn't want to be kissed. You kept following me like a lost puppy and you kept stalking my which I found extremely creepy. You went and questioned my friends like some jealous boyfriend when in reality your not. You are so obsessed with me that it's quite frightening. I mean for God's Sake, your four years older than me. Did you ever to take the time to think I might want to be with someone around my own age, someone who I can see all the time, someone who can pronounce my name right? I have tried to be nice to you and sit with you and talk, but a girl can only take so much." She took a deep breath. It seemed as if she wanted to say this for a long time, but that didn't change how shitty I felt. And she looked as if ripping out my heart and stepping on it was nothing. "Well," she finally said with a smile--she had the gall to smile?-- "we better get back. I'm sure your boat is about to leave." She turned around and walked away without waiting for me. I walked back with a frown, until the Weasel asked me for my autograph. Being a World Famous Quidditch player was great!
That's my story, as you see Learned my lesson and so did she
Now it's over, and I'm glad 'Cause I'm a fool for all I've said
Sitting in the boat and staring at the wall I started to recollect on what exactly happened. I guess I was stalking her, but that was because she wouldn't give me the time of day. When she said she had to study she was really with Potter and Weasel--no no--Weasley. Damn Malfoys. Can't trust any of them. That was one of the problems I guess. How I accused her of spending too much with Potter, when in reality it seemed she spent more time with Weasley. Oh well, it's over and I couldn't be happier. That girl had more mood swings than a women in her third trimester. Now, I can chase after Sophia, who has been eyeing me since we were 13! She doesn't seem to mind being smothered. And to think, I thought about marrying Hermy-own-ninny. But not after what she said. Hmph obsessive..I've never heard such a thing.
in a trap trip I can't grip never thought I'd be the one who'd slip then I started to realize I was living one big lie She fuckin hates me Trust She fuckin hates me La la la love I tried too hard And she tore my feelings like I had none And ripped them away
She fuckin hates me Trust She fuckin hates me La la la love I tried too hard And she tore my feelings like I had none And ripped them away La la la la la la la la la love Trust La la la la la la la la la love Trust She fuckin hates me
Met a girl, thought she was grand
Fell in love, found out first hand
Went well for a week or two Then it all came unglued
She was always at the library, doing homework, studying, reading, thinking, whatever. She never knew that I would always stare at her when no one was around. I know she liked her quiet and that's why I hated it when those noisy girls would come and start giggling and trying to talk to me. When we got the announcement about the Yule Ball, I knew I wanted to go with her. The only problem was she was always surrounded by that Potter character and the red-headed boy. I knew if I didn't get to her quickly one of them would ask her.
It was a week before the Ball and I still haven't asked her. Finally I got up enough courage to talk to her. Imagine that, Viktor Krum trying to get up enough courage to ask a girl who was at least four years younger than myself. When she looked up at me with those brown eyes of hers and just spilled everything to her: how I would go to the library just to see her, how I was afraid that she was already taking, how she might reject me. She looked at me in shock before smiling her beautiful smile and saying she'd love to.
The Ball was a great success at first. She loved to dance and she had a wonderful personality. We talked about everything and every once in a while we would still be holding each other even after the song ended. Everything seemed perfect.
I could tell that she was thirsty so I offered to get us some drinks. She went over to a table were she said her friends were. After I came back with the butterbeers in hand (the best thing about Hogwarts) she was gone. I asked her friends and the red-head practically bit my head off. So I went to go find her, but she wasn't inside the Great Hall. I went out in the corridor and found her standing there muttering about how much he was an idiot. Who he was I have no idea.
"I can't believe that he said that. Jerk! He knows how much I care about Harry."
Harry? She cares about Harry? At first I was furious that she had feeling for Potter. Was she using me? Then I rationally came to the conclusion that she cares for him as a friend. I walked up to her and gave her a hug. She returned the hug and quickly pulled away. She took the butterbeer and thanked me. After she took a few deep breathes we went back inside and started dancing again. Only this time she seemed more distant, like something was on her mind. She didn?t want to talk about it and when I pushed her to tell me she about ripped my arm off. Soon, the night was over and I was glad. I didn't want to be with a moody witch all night. However, before I left she pulled me back and apologized to me. I was so surprised that I kissed her cheek before I realized what I was doing. Now, that might not seem like such a big deal, but to a book worm like herself it was a life altering situation. She smiled and walked away.
In a trap trip I can't grip Never thought I'd be the one who'd slip Then I started to realize I was living one big lie
Soon afterwards when I tried to meet up with her again at the library or anywhere else, she was with Potter and the red-head. I knew that the latter didn't like me, why? I have no idea, and the former had his own problems. He was busy preparing for the second task, as was I. Karkaroff already told me what it was without giving me a chance to figure it out all by myself. Oh well, less work for me I guess. Not that I'm trying to be shallow or anything, but honestly, I have other stuff to deal with. Like why a girl is ignoring me.
Every time I tried to ask Hermy-own— no wait, Herm-own-ninny, to accompany me to the village or to take a tour on the Durmstrang boat, she would always say she had something to do. When I would follow her to find out what she had to do...well, let's just say I started to hate Potter more and more. She was also hanging out with that red-head, too, but let's face it— he's no competition. I mean, after all, I am a World Famous Quidditch Player. Not that I shove that in people's faces or anything. Finally she realized that she was ignoring me and started to spend some time with me when her bodyguards weren't around. We talked about everything...well, actually, I was doing most of the talking. She didn't think I saw, but most of the time she would stare at my eyebrows or out the window and nod and smile. How did I know she wasn't paying attention.
"So when I didn't catch the snitch everyone voz angry. Can you believe that?"
"Mm hm," she nodded.
"What why?" I asked again.
"Mm hm," she nodded again.
"I'm leaving tomorrow," I started, looking at her face for a reaction.
"Mm hm"
"I'm going to haff my mother's baby," I said, positive that she would snap out of it, but nothing doing. Although, I distinctly heard a stifled giggle.
"Mm hm"
I knew that when she was with her friends she would stick up for me, but when she was with me she seemed to want to leave. Even when I tried to kiss her, she would turn her head and give me her cheek. Then she would get up and say she had some studying to do. One time when I was looking out of the window of the ship, I saw her and she was not studying. In fact she was racing towards that little cabin with Potter and Weasel (I learned his name later on) in tow. And by the looks of it they were coming from the village that I asked her to come with me too that day.
Nothing I did seemed to be right with that girl. There hundreds of other girls who are willing to be with me. Why am I stuck with this one?
And just when I thought it couldn't get worst it did.
She was queen for about an hour After that shit got sour She took all I ever had No sign of guilt No feeling of bad, no
After the Second Task when everyone found out she was the one I would miss most, people started to treat her like a...well a girl who is dating a famous Quidditch player. I thought she would be happy, ecstatic, even a little joyous, but the more attention she got the more sour she felt towards me. Whenever I tried to approach her she would turn right around and practically run the other way. I asked her to stay with me over the summer, but thanks to that evil reporter, Skeezer or whatever her name is, that doesn't seem too likely. Now everyone thinks that she dumped her old boy friend for me. Well, I got news for you people, he can have her back. So far I have been putting every effort into this non-existent relationship and she just seems to throw it all away. I'm starting to believe that she actually— do I dare say it— hates me!
She fuckin hates me Trust She fuckin hates me La la la love I tried too hard And she tore my feelings like I had none And ripped them away
The last day of school came and I would be going back home soon. Things cooled down between me and Hermy-own-ninny (although, I would have rather had them heat up), but she still never gave me an answer. For some reason, I really did see the red-headed Weasel as a threat. They never seem to be without the other. When Potter went into the maze I looked up and saw her sitting there biting her nails in worry. What a disgusting habit. Then I saw Weasel pull her hands out and comfort her. He dared touch my Ninny, as I affectionately called her, though in private since I never had a chance to call her that to her face. And I can't just call that out in the middle of the corridor because Lord knows she won't turn around to answer me. I went into that maze and after that night she never left her friends side. Only to go to the bathroom I suppose, but I will not chase after her in there. Weasel always seemed to be able to make both of them crack a smile when they were depressed. He would even tickle Ninny to get her to open up. And I knew she loved it.
When I approached her by the doors, Weasel immediately went red. He seemed to be fuming when we walked a little ways away. When I looked at her she was looking at the back of Weasel's head. Things were already a bit rocky between us when she found out how I cornered Potter and asked him about his relationship with her. She was so mad when she found out that Potter could have gotten killed that night, but seemed even more furious at the thought that something was going on between her and her friend. I apologized profusely after that, but she seemed even more distant than before.
So here I was about to ask her about my invitation to stay at my house, and she was staring at the red-head. I guess I had it all wrong. It wasn't Potter who was a threat, but the Weasel. I cleared my throat to get her attention and she jumped in surprise, as if just noticing I was there. I asked her if she considered my request for her to stay with me for the summer.
"Oh, Viktor," she said evenly, "I would love to, but right now I think my friends really need me. I hope you understand."
Understand?! Hell, no I didn't understand.
"I thought you had feelings for me," I said hoping to coax her into coming.
"I do, Viktor..." She likes me! I knew it. I mean, who can resist my charm, there's hope after all. "...as a friend." Its amazing how fast you can fall from a cloud and back to a dreary corridor of an old castle.
"W-what?" I must have misunderstood, not heard right or something, but the look on her face told me I had heard right.
"Viktor, considering the fact that I might never see you again I'm going to be completely honest." I felt myself go pale and a huge warning sign was shining in my head with a huge UH-OH. "You were pushy. You kept trying to kiss me when it was obvious I didn't want to be kissed. You kept following me like a lost puppy and you kept stalking my which I found extremely creepy. You went and questioned my friends like some jealous boyfriend when in reality your not. You are so obsessed with me that it's quite frightening. I mean for God's Sake, your four years older than me. Did you ever to take the time to think I might want to be with someone around my own age, someone who I can see all the time, someone who can pronounce my name right? I have tried to be nice to you and sit with you and talk, but a girl can only take so much." She took a deep breath. It seemed as if she wanted to say this for a long time, but that didn't change how shitty I felt. And she looked as if ripping out my heart and stepping on it was nothing. "Well," she finally said with a smile--she had the gall to smile?-- "we better get back. I'm sure your boat is about to leave." She turned around and walked away without waiting for me. I walked back with a frown, until the Weasel asked me for my autograph. Being a World Famous Quidditch player was great!
That's my story, as you see Learned my lesson and so did she
Now it's over, and I'm glad 'Cause I'm a fool for all I've said
Sitting in the boat and staring at the wall I started to recollect on what exactly happened. I guess I was stalking her, but that was because she wouldn't give me the time of day. When she said she had to study she was really with Potter and Weasel--no no--Weasley. Damn Malfoys. Can't trust any of them. That was one of the problems I guess. How I accused her of spending too much with Potter, when in reality it seemed she spent more time with Weasley. Oh well, it's over and I couldn't be happier. That girl had more mood swings than a women in her third trimester. Now, I can chase after Sophia, who has been eyeing me since we were 13! She doesn't seem to mind being smothered. And to think, I thought about marrying Hermy-own-ninny. But not after what she said. Hmph obsessive..I've never heard such a thing.
in a trap trip I can't grip never thought I'd be the one who'd slip then I started to realize I was living one big lie She fuckin hates me Trust She fuckin hates me La la la love I tried too hard And she tore my feelings like I had none And ripped them away
She fuckin hates me Trust She fuckin hates me La la la love I tried too hard And she tore my feelings like I had none And ripped them away La la la la la la la la la love Trust La la la la la la la la la love Trust She fuckin hates me