Magnus was staring at his reflection on the glass, the book abandonend on the windowsill, his cat eyes shining in the dim lit library of the Institute.
I don't want to see you again, Alec. Or any of your friends. I'm tired of being their pet warlock.
The words he had said to Alec just a pair of week earlier kept echoing in his mind, too bad he hadn't been able to keep his promise, the war was coming there was no room for personal problems.
He let his breath out and leaned his forehead on the cold glass. Actually the one person he had not seen since that day in the subway was Alec himself.
He would have never admitted it, but everytime he entered the Institute he hoped for Alec to come and smile at him, that smile Magnus loved. Yet he knew somewhere deep inside his heart that his blue eyed Nephilim would stay away from him just as he had asked him to.
He had been the one saying their relationship was over and even if he missed Alec more than anything in the world he still felt hurt by his behaviour.
Alec was wandering alone. He could not stand staying at the Institute doing nothing save for training. He had never been like Jace who was able to fight stress or pain by fighting, he needed silence.
He had spent the first days after Magnus had broken up with him staring at the ceiling, utterly unable to sleep, then little by little he had started to feel nothing but numbness.
The light of Manhattan shone across the river, the wind caressed the Shadowhunter's black hair.
Suddenly a football player-looking boy bumped into him.
Had not been for the shiver down his spine, Alec would have thought the guy was just drunk, instead he took his Seraph Blade and had just the time to whisper its name, before the guy hit his side with a knife.
Everything went on in complete silence, the Shadowhunter and the demon fighting in the middle of the deserted road.
The demon bit the side of Alec's neck and the Nephilim jabbed his blade inside the chest of his enemy. The guy screamed and disappeared.
The pain left Alec almost blind, he fell down hitting the ground hard, the seraph blade still in his hand and a single thought in his mind
"I'm dying, everything's over."
Minutes passed by long as hour, it started to rain, the cold drops on his pale face looked like tears, even if he had no strenght to cry, what he desired the most was being able to look to Magnus face just one last time.
-Alec, Alec what happened?-
The voice came to him as from a very long distance, and it was just when he succeded in opening his eyed that he realized it was Simon who had spoken and that he was leaning over him.
-S... Simon...- He breathed. -Demon bite.-
-I'll take you to the Institute.- Simon tried to lift Alec, but the Nephilim shook his head.
-There's no time.- Simon's eyes looked oddly big on his face.
-I can run fast. I'll bring you at Magnus's he will cure you.-
-No!- Alec had meant to shout, but all that came out of his throat was a rattle.
-I won't let you die.- Alec's lips curled into a slight grateful smile.
-You can help, you can Turn me.-
Simon was sure that, if Alec had not been so pale and weak from the fight, would have flushed, and suddenly he realized what the Nephilim had said, the deep true meaning of his words.
-You're kidding me!- It was clear Alec was not kidding, he looked deadly pale and it was plain he was getting worse and worse. -Magnus will heal you.-
-Magnus will die in the process, Simon.- Red blood started to come out from Alec's lips, yet his eyes flashed of fear and pain.
Simon, despite his nature, felt cold, Alec was determined to die or being Turned and as he had swore he would never let him die.
-Ok, I'll do it if you want me to.-
-Yes, I beg you.-
Simon nodded and reached for Alec's neck. His blood didn't taste like Jace's, it was sweet and rich in a different way, it tasted like Alec himself, strong and frail at the same time.
Without realizing it he was hugging him as he would hug his own brother.
When the blue in Alec's eyes looked like glass, Simon made him drink his own blood.
-Thank you...- Alec whispered and tried to smile before his eye lids became too heavy and he closed his eyes. His breath stopped and he stood still into Simon's arms.
He wished he could cry the death of the boy who had become so dear to him as a member of his own family but there was no time indeed, he needed to bury him e let him rise again as a vampire. Simon lift Alec's body and ran. Where could he bury him? Alec was not a christian nor a jewish he was a Shadowhunter and Shadowhunters were to be buried in the Bones City, but the Silent Brothers would not allow a newborn vampire to raise in that sacred place.
He looked down at Alec's face, he had never looked so serene as now, in the eternal sleep of death, and suddenly the answer came to Simon's mind. Alec had asked him to be Turned just in order to protect Magnus, Magnus who would have died in the process of saving his mortal life, to Alec Magnus was the most precious thing in the world.
When the buzzer rang Magnus startled.
It was not like he was actually waiting for someone and he was not in the mood for wandering Shadowhunters asking for his help.
He opened the door and wait, his cat eyes glowing in the dark staircase.
The first thing he saw was Simon's face, his painful expression and the blood on his lips. He was about to tell the vampire he had no time for whatever he wanted, but then when he looked down he saw the only thing in the world he could have never been ready to see: Alec, the love of his life, dead.
Magnus ran to Simon ready to smash him down, instead he took the Shaodowhunter's body from him calling his name, hugging and rocking it and the tears started running through his face.
-You have to help him, Magnus.- Simon whispered, but the Warlock looked too shellshocked to hear anything.
-Magnus listen to me.- Simon tried again and this time the green gold eyes of the Warlock looked straight at him.
-You killed him, I'll kill you.- He said. Simon shook his head and forced himself to stay still even though blue sparks had began to spill from Magnus's fingers.
-Stop it Magnus, we need to bury Alec and wait for the twilight, trust me please.-
The look on Magnus's face went from painful to horrified.
-You made him one of your kind, my precious Alec, my Angel you Turned him into a Demon, you're the worst...-
-He asked me to.- Simon's breathed. Magnus's body was shaking.
-That's my fault.- He whispered. Simon took his hand.
-No, it's not. Alec was dying a demon bit him, I found him and told Iwould have brought him to you to make you cure him, but he refused, he said you would have died in the process, and then he said the only thing I could do to preserve him from dying was Turning him.- Magnus's face was paler than ever.
-He wanted to protect you Magnus, he wanted you to be safe.-
The warlock lift Alec's body as it was the most important thing in the world and muttered something that Simon considered as an order to move. Together they reached for the backyard and Magnus sat on the ground with his loved one into his arms.
-Prepare the grave Vampire.- He said bitterly and a spade appeared beside Simon. In the meantime Magnus was caressing Alec's hair.
Before putting Alec's body into his grave, Magnus kissed his lips and said something in a language Simon did not know.
They covered the grave and then sat down waiting.
Magnus's expression was blank as the pain had dried every other feeling from him.
-Alec loves you, Magnus.- Simon whispered forcing himself to ignore the silence between them. The warlock did not answer.
-Magnus, please say something.-
-Why? What do you expect me to say? That it's all right, Alec'll wake up and everything will be fine, well Simon it's not like that, he died, he died and I was not there to protect him, in fact I was the reason why he was alone.- He stopped and he looked like he ran off of breath. -I put the one person I love more than my own life in danger and let him die and throw away everything in what he believed.-
Simon looked away from the warlock and took an useless breath.
- If it had been you who were dying and knowing that Alec could have helped you at the cost of his life what would have you done?- He whispered.
-I'd rather be dead than being alive knowing I've been the reason for Alec's death, which is exactly what happened in the end, I'm alive, Alec died in the process of saving me.-
-He didn't, he has been strong enough to chose a different path. The only one which would allow you both to stay alive.-
When the twilight arrived, Magnus felt like he had no more tears to cry, it has been centuries since the last time he had actually cried.
The sun went down disappearing behind the Hudson and the Warlock's cat eyes looked at the mole-hill under which Alec's body was buried. He had seen many vampires raise, the inhuman look in their eyes, their lust for blood, he didn't want to see his Alec like that, but he knew he had to be strong as his blue eyed angel had been when he had chosen that life. Magnus moved foreward and as he did so he saw something glimmering. As a pulse the white light similar to a witchlight became stronger and stronger.
With a scream Magnus catch the cold hand coming out from under the ground, Alec's hand, he took it and wait for the other one to reach out.
When Clary had helped Simon out of his grave, Magnus had not fully realize how she felt, but now he felt like his whole life depended on that moment.
When Alec raised he had his eyes shut, his lips parted, but his skin was white, smooth as porcelain, no dirt had affected it nor the black hair around his pretty face.
Magnus didn't let go of his hands, he muttered his name and waited for him to attack in search for blood. Alec opened his eyes and stared at the warlock calmly, then smiled.
-I hoped I just could see you the moment I'd wake up.- He whispered. His eyes were a bright crystal blue, brighter then ever and his voice was sweet, the voice Magnus had recalled in his dreams.
-Sweetheart...- He called in a whisper and reached his face with his fingers, brushing his cheek lightly. It was not as cold as Magnus had expected.
-I'm sorry for everything.- Alec said. He looked like he was about to cry. Magnus just shook his head unable to say anything.
-Don't you need blood?- Simon's voice came as from a very far place.
-Maybe.- Alec muttered.
-How can that be? You're supposed to be thirsty.-
-I know. It's just I'm not.-
-Simon go inside, we will be there right away.- Simon looked at Magnus and nodded and moved, suddenly aware that they needed their own time together.
-Do you feel cold?- Magnus asked as soon as Simon disappeared inside the apartment.
Alec shook his head and then looked up at the warlock's face.
-I feel strong and still broken inside as I was when I realized what I'd done to you.-
-I love you Alec, this hasn't changed...-
-But you won't be with me again, I know that much.- He looked down before Magnus's fingers lifted his face and his lips touched Alec's for an eternal moment.
-I love you and I want you, I can't live without you by my side.- Magnus breathed.
Alec smiled lightly and put his head on Magnus's shoulder.
The warlock lifted him into his arms.
-Let's go home.- He said kissing his black hair.