Lonely…
I remember yesterday was when everything happened. The zombies came up overnight and that day was the end of everyone in Raccoon City. Some liked to think they could escape, but I knew it was impossible from the first zombie I saw. My mother was the first.
That morning, I remember waking up and noticing the whole world had changed on me. First there was only the wind outside, no sound of traffic or people going to work. I remember wondering if everyone had packed up and left during the night, leaving me there. Then she came into my room. She tried to get at me, and I shoved her off. My little brother was in tatters in his bed. She had gotten at him before coming after me. I wish my brother would of screamed, I would of heard him. Why didn't he scream? I left the house after she came stumbling back out of my bedroom.
Where I lived… there was no chaos like what must have been going on in the heart of the city. I remember running through my neighborhood… and everyone's door seemed to be open. People were out in the street… only they had turned over. All these people that used to be on my side, they were all against me now. They all wanted to kill me, devour me. I was still running in my boxer shorts and bare feet.
It was windy out, I was very cold when I found the survivors. They found me actually, as I was running down the long wooded road leading out of the suburbs. They said they would of shot me if I didn't seem so out of place. I got a pair of pants and a jacket from them. No shoes or socks. Their truck offered little protection when it got overrun. I told them not to go into the city. Wait… maybe I didn't. I can only remember thinking of my mother and brother when those three in the truck were discussing how to get supplies.
I left them before they died. I remember watching from a distance as they met a roadblock and the masses found them. After that, I knew there was no chance of leaving. Unlike other people, I never look at a situation and kid myself. The reality was I knew my time was coming just like it had come for everyone else.
Laying low for the rest of the day, I still couldn't manage to find any shoes. Maybe it was for the better, I never made a sound and running in bare feet forced you to pay attention. Being that vulnerable, my only thought was survival. I never though about the situation I was in until I was trying to go to sleep amongst a stinking pile of garbage bags behind an abandoned restaurant. My reasoning for sleeping there… I figured it was safe that they couldn't smell that I was still alive. And the garbage drowned out their stench, which felt like it was tainting me everytime the wind blew their smell into my face.
In the garbage, I thought about my mother and brother. Now, they were dead. Not dead in the sense that I would never see them again… dead in they were no longer my kind. In the city now, I was the outcast. What is the point of being alive if everyone around you is undead? I got to thinking I was the only living person left in the world. My world didn't reach beyond this city… and thinking back I don't remember why.
The next day began like it was still the first. Now their stench was so strong I could smell it even underneath rotting cabbage and coffee grounds. When I left, it seemed like I was one of them. Walking in the middle of the street, they just passed me by, staring forward longingly. I didn't know if there was something higher up calling them, somewhere they had to go, or what. None of them noticed I was still playing for the other team. I was convinced, I was the only one left.
The whole day was like that. I could do anything, but all I wanted was for things go back to normal. I'll admit it, I was lonely. Everyone was different. My family was gone. The world had come to a stop. My soles of my feet were like hard rubber, and they were pitch black from God knows what. All I did was walk through the city streets, and nothing changed. Before it even got dark, I just laid down and went to sleep on the sidewalk.
I woke up stiff, and a fire hydrant was gushing water infront of me. It amazed me. There were some new fires and crashed cars around also. Had everything changed again? Had time gone back and there were still real people around? When I tried getting up, my whole body was aching. My spine felt like it was bent in all kinds of wrong positions, and it cracked when I stood. I looked down into the puddle of water in the street, but it was harder to see now. I knelt down very slowly, and looked at myself. What was looking back wasn't me. It had a dead white face and dark, dark circles under its eyes. My lips were even white, and I could see blood had trickled down out of my mouth and was crusted now. I placed a finger inside of my mouth, and there was no warmth.
All my feelings of desperation, loneliness and despair were no longer there. I stood up, and somehow I had become one of them.