I decided Josh wasn't home for Valentine's Day. Beckett and him did not celebrate. She spent the day with Castle and went home to an empty apartment. This is maybe two weeks or so after that. I do not own any of these characters, although I wish I did. This is what you get when it's 3 am and I can't sleep. Hope you enjoy :3
"Josh?"
Surprise floored Beckett as she held onto the door to keep her standing, the carefree smile that graced her face quickly slipping off of it. Why was he there? He was supposed to be in Africa. He wasn't supposed to be here, no. Castle was on his way.
"Hey."
It was all he said and it jolted her out of her thoughts, sinking her back down to reality. As he leaned in to kiss her lips she turned her head slightly, making him kiss her cheek. She could feel the questions radiating off of him as she pushed her hair behind her ears, her heart thudding loudly in her chest.
"You weren't supposed to be back for another week," she said quietly, standing in the doorway still. If she let him, that would be mean admitting he was really there.
"They didn't need me so they sent me home." He was staring at her intently, trying to get inside of her head - not that he had ever been able to. From day one she had closed a part of her off from him, something that infuriated him to no end. He knew that the wall she had built had only increased over the time that he was gone.
"Oh," was all she said as she tried to think of a way to get out of this. She wasn't ready for him to be back. She wasn't ready to deal with reality. She wanted Josh to go away and for Castle to come and for them to pretend that the outside world didn't exist as they watched stupid movies and stole bites of food from each other.
But that couldn't happen. Not without someone getting hurt.
Clearing her throat, she stepped aside and finally allowed him in. She needed to get this over with. Closing the door quietly, she led the way to the kitchen where she motioned for him to sit down on the bar stool. She was wringing her hands, her bottom lip tucked securely between her teeth as she focused on the floor.
"You're breaking up with me, aren't you?"
Her heart broke out into a run, thumping against her chest as she looked up in fear at him. She had a whole speech planned for him when he got home, in a week. Right now it was just a shock to see him. Not trusting her mouth at the moment, she nodded in response. She watched as his eyes fell, his whole body seeming to slump in defeat.
"I'm so sorry, Josh. You're.. Amazing but," she shook her head, another man's face popping into her vision.
"I'm not Castle?" His words weren't harsh, they weren't bitter. He just sounded sure of himself.
She nodded, pulling the zip hoodie tighter on her body. Her emotions were running haywire, ready for this to be over. Before either of them could say anything else, there was a knock on the door. Her heart once again jumped against her chest, her eyes flying to the door. She hadn't even made to move when Josh brushed by her, squeezing her hand gently.
"It's alright, Kate. I understand."
He gave her a small smile before continuing to the door, opening it to reveal Castle on the other side. The writer looked like a deer caught in headlights as his eyes went from Josh to her, looking a bit like a cartoon character. The doctor stood back, offering for him to come. As Castle slowly stepped in, Josh clapped his hand on his shoulder and gave Kate one last look.
"Take care of her," was all he said as he let himself out of the apartment, closing the door behind him.
Beckett felt the room spinning around her as she leaned against the wall, feeling her body just give out on her. Not having to say a word Castle quickly crossed the room to her side and held her to him. He felt the warm tears soak through his shirt as she silently sobbed, her small body jerking in his arms.
It wasn't that she regretted what she had done, nor did she regret what she was going to do in the future. But she felt this huge weight lifting off of her shoulders, a floodgate for her tears going up. Castle was rubbing her back, whispering soft nothings in her ear as she calmed herself down. Any other person she would tell to back off, to leave her alone and let her deal with this herself but she knew he wouldn't go away. He wouldn't leave her alone.
Holding onto the front of his shirt, she pulled herself back far enough to look up at him. Tears stained her cheeks and her eyes were swollen and red, her breathing still a bit choppy from her emotional breakdown. Licking her dry lips, she forced words out.
"You're still here?"
"I'm still here," he told her.
After a moments debate, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Letting it out slowly, she opened her eyes again to focus on him.
"Promise?"
"Always," he reassured her.
