You're pacing around the room, back and forth while biting one of your nails, trying to calm yourself down. You're in the backstage at your dressing room, an hour before your show officially starts, you're vocal coach is sitting on the couch trying to think a solution for your problem.
This morning when you woke up , your voice sounded different. At first you didn't mind it, thinking it's because of all the alcohol you consumed at last night's party and in a few hours your voice would be back to normal but no. During your soundcheck you tried to hit one of the high notes in your song but your voice cracked and your throat has this burning sensation inside.
You told your vocal coach about it and she told you that your vocal chords might be damaged. When she told you that, you swear that you stopped breathing for a long time, your whole body stiffened and your mind went blank.
Your voice is one of your most prized possessions. It's one of the things you're so thankful for that god gave it to you. When she told you that it might be damaged you don't know what to do. You started to panic because your world tour just started and you have about 85 shows to complete and you're only on your twelfth show, not including tonight's show.
Your vocal couch stands up from the couch and faces you.
"I think we need to cancel tonight's show" she tells you softly
Your eyes widens at what she just said. You can't just cancel tonight's show because your fans would be so disappointed. They're the reason why you're here, why you have platinum records, your songs being top 1 in billboard's hot 100 , why you have so many awards and the least you could do to show them how grateful you are to have them is by giving all of your best when you perform because saying thank is just not enough. You love them not just because they made you a worldwide superstar, it's because they helped you accomplish your dream. You never cared about the fame and the fortune, you just want to be a musician; a singer because you wanted to share your music to the world.
"No we can't cancel tonight's show a lot people will get disappointed, heck some of them are already out there just waiting for those big doors to open..we can't just cancel it" you reasoned out
You hear your manager sigh and she shakes her head
"No one wants to cancel tonight's show, our crew worked hard to build the stage and everything and you too, you've been practicing endlessly but if we don't cancel now, we might have to cancel more if your voice is really damaged" she explains to you
You face the floor and shake your head.
"No..it's just that" you tried to come up with something to prevent the show being cancelled but you can't think of anything.
Your manager came in to the room and tells you "Look how about this, you just lip-synced the whole performance tonight"
You look at him with wide eyes and you furiously shake your head at him. One thing you're known for is that you never lip-synced or use autotune. Those stuffs sickens you. You hate those people who lip-syncs or use autotune. Especially that Rebecca Black kid. The moment you heard her song Friday you wanted to yell at her for using autotune on her voice and the song was so bad you swear you might get deaf because of it.
"No there is now way I'm lip-syncing , Santana Lopez does not lip-sync" you tell him and your vocal coach agrees with you
"Then fine what do you want to do? Go on with tonight's show and damage your voice more or just cancel it and we'll go to the doctors' tomorrow" your vocal coach suggested
"I- " again you can't think of any words to say. As much as you hate you cancelling on a show, you hate getting your voice be damaged more.
Your vocal coach places her hand on your shoulder and smiles softly at you "Let's just cancel it , I'm sure they'll understand, they're like the best fans in the whole world, when was the time they did not defend, understand or support you? " she tells you
You sigh, defeated. You just nod. You trust the words she said to you about your fans understanding on the condition you are in right now.
"Ok then..we'll go ahead and announce it" your manager says. He left the room, leaving you and your vocal coach behind.
"I really am sorry Santana, I wish I could create some magic potion that will help your voice be back to normal again" she tells you
"Thanks Mamma Cade" you smile at her. Cade has been your vocal couch ever since you started to be in the music industry. She's in her 50's and she lets everyone call her mamma. She's like your second mother. She takes care of you, make sure you're healthy, that you sleep enough and she helps you take care of your voice. And you just don't know what happened why your voice started to sound this way. Your voice sounds like you have a bad cold and all of your mucus is stuck in your throat.
"Now let's just go home and just solve this problem tomorrow.. You've been stressed out all day" she tells you.
You both stand up and leave the room.
You go to the back door of the arena because you can't face your fans who's at the front , waiting to go in ,to see you perform and just have them disappointed.
You find Telly , your personal bodyguard and well your bestfriend also, waiting for you.
He just smiles softly at you as you both head to your tour bus.
/
You're inside your tour bus, laying down on a small but comfy bed , waiting for Mamma Cade, who's trying to help your manager explain your condition to your fans.
You grab your laptop and you go to twitter.
You tweeted how deeply sorry you are for cancelling on them and you promise them by the time you're voice heals you'll give them your best performance ever. With that you shut your laptop, not wanting to go through your mentions or see any trending topics related to you.
You hear the door of the bus opens , revealing Mamma Cade , Telly and your manager, Lucas.
Lucas, is a very kind manager, he helps you manage everything you need to accomplish by the end of the day and is like a big brother figure to you since he's only 28 and you're only 21.
"Well…we somehow got the situation handled very well but when we tried to further explain they kept on screaming boo" he tells you
You hear someone chuckle and the source was Telly. You see Lucas glaring at him and Telly stops and clears his throat.
"Yeah it was pretty bad" Telly says, looking away from Lucas
"But thank god they understood and wished you to get better soon" Mamma Cade explains .
You just sigh sadly and just want to sleep to get this day over with and maybe by the time you wake up tomorrow you're voice is already healed.
"Let's just go back to the hotel" you say
They just nodded.
You lay on your bed comfortably , you shut your eyes and in a few minutes you quickly drifted off to sleep.
/
Your doctor came by to visit you in your hotel room, to check on your voice.
"So Santana just sit there and let's get started" he tells you
You just nod and quickly sat on the chair.
The doctor pulls on his gloves, grabs the things he needs and goes over you.
"Now just open your mouth and say ahhh" he tells you
You do as what he tells you as he used his little flashlight to check on your throat and has this like popsicle stick that he's pressing on your tongue.
"Uh-huh…hmmm" he says as he examines your throat more
He turns off his flashlight and removes the stick on your tongue and he goes over to the sink as he removes his gloves.
"So tell me Santana, during your 1 week break, have you been screaming a lot?" he asks you
You quickly shake your head "No…not that I remember " you say
But you do remember. You're just afraid what he might say to you if tell him.
You we're on your 1 week break and you've been hanging out with your family and friends that week. You guys went on different adventures and you do remember screaming a lot especially when you went to cheer on your little brother's mini basketball game, also the time when you and your friends went to go play paintball and the time when you went to the amusement park and you rode on a very scary rollercoaster that you screamed your heart out.
"Uh-huh..it seems that your vocal chords bruised and scabbed" he explains
"What?!" you shout and your throat started to burn then he glares at you for interrupting him
"It's not permanently damaged…yet" he continues "So I'll be giving you some medicines to help your vocal chords heal, some nasal cleansing and my number one advice, don't speak, let your voice rest"
You just nod and nod in whatever he's saying and the thing that catches your full attention is in not speaking.
"Wait..what? Me ? Not speaking? How long?" you ask
"Judging by the damage you have now caused..probably a month" he tells you like it's not a big deal
"A month?! Are you serious?!" you yell
"Shhh! Starting now" he tells you
"But" you squeak
"No speaking, I'll go talk to your manager" he says and leaves the room.
Your mind is racing, processing what he just told you. A month, a freaking month where you will not speak or sing and the idea scares you. That means you'll be cancelling on more shows, you can't go to any interviews, you can't talk to your friends, family,fans and just about everyone.
Your body starts to shake and you swear you're turning so pale then you hear the door on your room open and your doctor is back with Lucas and Mamma Cade.
The old woman went over to you and hugs you. You hug her back and you rest your head on her shoulders for a while, you feel her comfort and somehow you feel better but not that better. After a while you decided to pull out of the hug and she gives you a sad smile.
Your doctor and Lucas are talking and you see Lucas looking frustrated but most of all worried as he scratches the back of his head, he kept on nodding to whatever the doctor is saying then after a few minutes your hear Lucas say thank you.
The doctor went over to you and tells you that you can't speak for a month, eat fried foods and you can't drink cold stuffs. You just nodded at what he told you.
Finally he bids everyone goodbye and wishes you to feel better soon.
/
It's been 2 days after your appointment with your doctor and Lucas is talking to your mom on the phone , explaining what just happened to you. You could hear your mom asking so many questions and Lucas is trying his best to answer them.
You feel someone touch your shoulders and squeezes it softly and you see it's your friend Quinn. She came by to visit you the moment she heard you were not feeling well. You and Quinn have been bestfriends since the start of your Freshmen year in high school. Both of you were in the glee club and during those times when you guys would perform in front of so many people, you know that you want to be a successful singer and sing in front of many people who's cheering and screaming your name.
"It's gonna be ok San, just do what the doctor told you and you'll get better soon" she says
You just nod and smile at her. 2 days you haven't said a word and it's killing you. This is the longest time where you haven't said anything and sing. Your saliva is drying inside of your mouth and it's grossing you out.
/
You went back to your hometown which is Lima, Ohio to continue your vocal rest there with your family. You were kinda glad about it since you really miss them and you miss the hug and soothing words of your mother. The moment you came back to the house where you grew up, you were tackled by your mother, who hugged you so hard.
You never liked Lima, Ohio . You promised yourself when you were a kid that you'll get out of this town and make it big, and you did. But it kinda feels good to be back, kinda.
/
It's been now a week since you haven't spoken anything , you joined your father at the hospital where he works. Your father is the most respected doctor in the whole town and you're so proud of him. When you were a kid , he always tells you about being a great doctor and now he is. Everybody in town adores him , when you guys would walk outside, many people often greet him . He's a Clinical Neurophysiologist, the only thing you could understand about his job is that he specializes in brain and stuffs.
You're at his office, alone while he's checking up on some patients. You were busy checking some of his stuffs until you hear a knock on the door and you hear it being open
You turn around to see who it is and it's a tall blonde girl. She's looking at you with wide eyes and you could see her whole body stiffens.
You examine her quickly, your eyes move from her head to her toe and you think she's very pretty, especially her bright blue eyes. You clear your throat and you smile awkwardly at the girl cause you thought she saw you checking her out.
"Um..sorry..dad is away..I mean Dr. Lopez is out right now" you say , feeling nervous for whatever reason
The girl didn't respond , she's just stares at you and it looks like she doesn't know what to do.
You just stand at your spot ,awkwardly cause you also don't know what to do next . You look down and you fumble with the hem of your shirt and bit your lip as you feel her eyes are still on you.
"Oh hey Brittany" you hear your father's voice
You look up and sees the girl smile cheerfully at your father. You look at them with confusion and your father turns to you. He just smiles and faces the girl whom he just called Brittany again.
The girl points outside and your father nods. "I'll be downstairs in a minute" he says "Just wait for me there"
The girl nods and leaves you and your father alone.
"I guess you already met my favorite patient" he tells you
"Favorite patient?" you ask then you quickly cover your mouth ,realizing you just spoke and you feel your throat burns. Your father just glares at you.
"Yeah, unlike any other patients I had, Brittany fully accepted her sickness , she never took everything seriously , she just fully embraced it and I wish more people are like her, instead of drowning yourself with sadness with their condition just see it as a very hard challenge that you'll soon win" he says
You don't know why he's telling you this. You didn't drown yourself with sadness when you heard your sick. Then he notices the look on your face and you see him smirk.
"Please, I always hear you every night throwing your pillows everywhere and you groaning so loud" he says
You just shrug. Who wouldn't be angry when the doctor just told you that you will not speak for a month, that your voice might be permanently damaged and it could pretty much ruin your whole life.
"You know you and Brittany are the same" he tells you, you look at him confused."But not so the same also, you will not speak for a month because your voice is damage while her, she never spoke ever since she was born, she has to bear being silent in her whole life, while you…you just have to bear it for a month"
Your shoulders slump down and you look down. You think of the things your father just said and you feel bad. If you can't bear not speaking what more about her?
"I'll go downstairs…want to come?" he offers you, you just nod.
/
When you got downstairs you saw Brittany using some hand gestures in front of some kids. You stare at them for a little while until you hear your father speak "Those kids are just like her, she's teaching them how to do some simple hand gestures and telling them they'll make it through to their life without speaking" he explains
You look back at Brittany and you could see her face filled with joy. You must have been staring for so long because suddenly Brittany caught your stare and she just smiles at you and you feel that, that smile was more than a simple smile , it's like there are words behind it.
/
A/N: This is my first time on a Brittana-fic hope you like it. Sorry for my mistakes. I got the idea of this when I was listening to When you say nothing at all . Please tell me what you think =)