Epitaph

As dawn light filtered through lace curtains on the kitchen window at the Circle Bar Seven, Evan McFadden stomped through the back door into the mud room on his rush to the kitchen. He yelled, "Daniel!" The teenager bumped into his sister-in-law, who frowned.

"He's not down yet, Evan," Hannah informed, "and please don't go yelling in my ear."

"Great. Now I have to start his chores, too. Just gonna be late." The almost seventeen-year-old went from disgusted to sheepish. "Sorry."

"It's okay," she acknowledged as she stepped past him.

Brian looked up from the griddle where he had pancakes and bacon grilling. "Don't worry about it. Time's a'wastin. One of us'll get to it after breakfast."

As Evan smiled and replied, "Thanks, Bri," Hannah handed him a stack of plates. He commenced setting the table as Ford and Guthrie set down silverware and small glasses of juice.

Oldest brother Adam took the percolator off the stove and began pouring coffee. He handed mugs to Brian and Hannah before sipping from one himself and setting three more on the table at Crane's, Daniel's, and Evan's places before returning it to the stove.

Daniel McFadden entered the kitchen. "Did someone call me?"

"I did." Evan looked up from his task. "Thought I'd have to do your chores with you sleeping in, but Brian said not to worry about it."

Brian flipped a pancake. "Just this once."

Daniel made a face at his next-youngest sibling. "I wasn't sleeping in, Evan. I didn't sleep too well with Crane coming in late." With a gesture from Adam, he grabbed the milk bottle, poured two glasses, and chugged the rest of the bottle himself.

As Daniel set the milk at Ford's and Guthrie's places, Adam noted, "I didn't hear a thing. What time did he get in?"

"I don't know. Woke me up but I didn't notice the time," Daniel said rubbing one eye and yawning.

"About three. Woke me up too," Brian added as he brought a big platter of pancakes to the table. "Figure he'll be out 'til lunch."

"Or later. He must be exhausted," Adam said.

Guthrie took his seat. "Why bother coming home so late? I think I'd just stay at the hotel another night." Several of his brothers nodded in agreement.

"Maybe because after being away so long, he'd rather sleep in his own bed," Hannah addressed Guthrie.

"Four days isn't that long," the youngest McFadden replied. "It's not like going on a real vacation, like a week or more."

"Bakersfield isn't what I'd call a vacation spot, Guth. Crane was there on business," Brian reminded him.

"I know, but it would be great to just get away from here for a while. Adam, maybe …?"

Brian furrowed his brow. "Maybe when we have the money, Half-stuff."

Guthrie whined, "Now you're beginning to sound like Crane." He looked at the empty place across from him. "Lucky he gets to go somewhere else."

Adam set a platter of bacon on the table. He was the last of those present not seated. "Squirt, what's this whining about a vacation? It doesn't sound like you."

Ford looked up from his plate. "Guthrie's teacher made the class write about what they'd like to do this summer for homework."

On their side of the table, Daniel looked beyond Ford at his youngest brother. "Summer's a long way off, Guth. Winter's barely over."

"I know …"

Hannah reached over to rub Guthrie's back. "Cheer up, Guth. I'm sure we'll be able to get a camping trip in sometime."

Guthrie's voice muffled in reply. "We go camping plenty of times. It's not the same."

As Adam took his seat, he exchanged a look with Brian before glancing at Crane's empty place. "Not promising, but we'll see what Crane has to report."

Guthrie and Ford wore excited expressions. The younger asked, "You mean it, Adam?"

The elder brother rolled his eyes. "I just said, no promises."

The two youngest brothers grinned and high-fived each other.

As the pancake platter reached Adam, the phone rang. He sighed. "At this hour?" He rose. "I'll get it."

"Might be the school," Hannah called after him. "Remember the emergency last month when the power was out at the high school."

Four pairs of student eyes looked expectantly at each other. They collectively held their breath.

Adam walked into the front room and picked up the phone on the desk. He tried to ignore the din of kitchen chairs scraping. "Hello? … Hi. Haven't seen you in a long time. How is …? Um …" He glanced upstairs, then back to the living room, noticing several of his brothers listening in on the call. "No, he's not up yet." He saw disappointed looks on his younger brothers' faces and brought a hand to his free ear as they trailed back to the kitchen. "Can I take a message?" He listened, staring out the window, his voice quiet, expression grim. "I'm sorry." He sighed. "Yes. Yes, I understand. I'll tell him. Thanks. Bye."

Adam replaced the receiver in the cradle and looked out the window. The sun, now halfway above the horizon, lightened the new day, but did nothing for his sinking heart. Feeling his eyes moisten, he closed them, dropping his head into one hand.

"Adam?" Hannah approached her husband from the rear and hugged him, her hands reaching around to his front. He wrapped an arm around hers, raising his head and sighing. They each half turned to face each other. She noticed his red-rimmed eyes and murmured, "What is it?"

He looked at her and sighed again. Lips pursed, he shook his head. Rubbing her shoulder, he shrugged and glanced upstairs, squeezing her hand as he left her embrace. He seemed to carry the weight of the world on weary shoulders as he climbed the stairs.

~~00oo00~~

Adam paused outside Crane and Daniel's bedroom. Why did he have to be the bearer of bad news? Of course, lest he need reminding, he was the one who had taken the call. Good thing one of the younger boys had not picked up. This was heavy stuff, adult stuff, although it affected the young as well. They were bound to find out at some point. Their small part of the world was as prone to gossip, if not more so, than the bigger parts of it. All the more reason to let Crane know sooner than later, to hear it from him and not some idle chatter from the boys, or worse yet, someone else.

But, still, he hesitated to knock. Perhaps he should wait until Crane woke up and had something to eat. But this would just ruin his day. Damn, it was already wrecking Adam's day.

To Adam, his brother's getting in so late meant one thing: He wanted to be back in his own bed, under his own roof, within the comfort and familiarity of his family after so much crazy BS he had likely endured at the association's annual meeting. If it also signalled Crane's success in procuring a deal to further the ranch's income or defeat and wanting to lick his wounds, Adam had no idea. But, doubtless the third oldest was exhausted. Those meetings meant hobnobbing from morning to night with the fat cats and smaller outfits like theirs. He sighed. He could put it off, but no, better to get it out of the way,

And so he knocked lightly and entered. He smiled briefly as he watched the third in the family in slumber, lying peacefully under a blanket and quilt. His gaze found the dream catcher on the wall above Crane's bed. A reminder. She had given it to him so long ago, to catch their collective dreams, she said. Adam eyed it ruefully, then returned his attention to his brother. Even in sleep, Crane was neat and tidy, ordered, no jumbled covers here. His long form on his side, he was dead to the world. Adam gulped. There was that word. There was no easy way to do this.

He sat on the bed, laying a tentative hand on Crane's shoulder. His brother moaned, a hand swatting at the touch. Adam squeezed lightly and held on.

"Umm … what?"

"Hey." Adam's voice was soft.

"We need hay?" Crane grinned sleepily.

"No."

Crane reached a hand to his eyes. Rubbing, he shifted to his back. "Can't anybody get any sleep around here?"

Adam rubbed Crane's shoulder. He sat stone-faced.

"You're cheerful this morning." Crane's voice reached a more awake tone. "What's going on?"

Adam sighed. "I don't know how to say this."

Crane propped himself up on one elbow. "Say what?"

The elder brother paused. "Mrs. Slater called a few minutes ago."

"Early."

"Yeah." Adam regarded Crane, his eyes moistening again.

Crane stared into space, his mind trying to catch up with his woken state. Mrs. Slater? Their ranch? No. What else? A realization. His breath caught. "No! No! Beth?"

Finally, Adam spoke. "I'm sorry, bro."

Crane tried to speak through tears. "When?"

"Just last night."

"How?"

Adam closed his eyes and breathed deeply. "What you'd suspect."

Crane turned away from Adam and crashed, sniffling, back to the pillow. Adam held tight to his shoulder.

Just then Daniel came rushing in, singing a song. Seeing a somber Adam and an upset Crane, he stopped. "What's going on?"

Adam eyed him. He bit his lip a moment, and scolded, "Don't you know how to knock?!"

Daniel's voice caught. "Uh, it's my room. I forgot my notebook. Sorry." He stood frozen for a moment and repeated, "What's going on?"

Adam closed his eyes to compose himself. Sighing, he spoke as evenly as he could muster. "I'm sorry, Daniel. Please. Get to school."

Daniel, open-mouthed, was speechless. Finally, he turned. "Sure."

Adam watched him leave and close the door behind him without a sound. His focus returned to Crane. As his brother's soft snuffles evened out, Adam relaxed his grip on Crane's shoulder. Standing, he listened to his brother breathe. This was bound to be a restless sleep. His thoughts reminded him that their old-fashioned, quiet slice of an increasingly busy and crazy world was not immune from what once seemed only like big city problems. One could not hide from them, and try as they might, they had to face them head on even if the result was the tragedy they faced now. He said a silent prayer to keep his brothers safe from their intrusion and, more immediately, to help Crane and all of them through this.