Disclaimer: Neither Naruto nor anything else worth something belongs to me.
AN: None of this is Betaed; I'm the only one who's edited it so sorry for any mistakes.
WARNING: Sexual talk and seduction, non-graphically mentions rape, and they're ninjas, aka they're gonna kill people.
And we're pretending that the whole war of the ninja nations happened really quickly, or maybe this is part of the preparations or something, because I want them to still be relatively young, and thus I'm probably messing with the canon timeline.
When Shikamaru, Kiba, Naruto, Neji, and Hinata are sent on a mission their only hope of getting close to the target without alerting him and his associates is seduction. But that's one area they aren't too sure about, well, most of them have no clue.
Just Another Weapon
The mission was going great; they made good time, arrived early, located the target right away, and hadn't been noticed by any potential threats. Which was why Shikamaru was so frustrated with his teammates right now. He'd been assigned to lead the group consisting of Kiba, for tracking, Naruto, for power if they ended up in battle, Neji, for trailing enemies and battle, and Hinata, for healing and even more battle support. They were all Chunin by now, even if they were only sixteen, and after the whole thing with Orochimaru had calmed down a few months ago Shikamaru was being considered for promotion to Jonin status. Troublesome, but that's what he got for planning brilliant ways to defeat immortal enemies, and other inspired battle plans.
But that wasn't what he was focusing on now, no; his current teammates were all bickering about how to get the target out of the bar and to an excluded place where they could search him and steal the documents he held, without alerting the other ninja with him. Maybe it was just the genius in him speaking but it seemed obvious to him. The man had been flirting with the female bartender, and any other female who sat close enough, all evening: the best plan of action was clearly seduction. When he said as much everyone had something negative to input. Hinata stuttered out an explanation that she wasn't allowed to do anything because she was the heir of her clan while Neji glared protectively as he stood between her and Shikamaru. Kiba was also protective of the girl who'd been his Genin teammate and Naruto just called the shadow user a pervert.
Rolling his eyes Shikamaru sighed, "Troublesome. I meant one of us, who is not a virgin and would have no issues with a little making-out could henge and lure the man outside and into the alley behind the bar where he could be slipped a knockout pill."
"Like when I turn into a sexy girl to give perverts nosebleeds?" Naruto was so lucky he had a loyal Nara to be the brains behind him when he became Hokage; otherwise he'd get the whole town burnt down through his brainlessness.
"Yes, but with clothes," the loyal Nara explained patiently.
"But, kissing another guy? Ewww," he wrinkled his nose up as he considered the thought, Kiba nodded his agreement.
"Seriously? Troublesome," Shikamaru still looked bored, and a little frustrated, but there was almost a hint of, well, almost like he pitied them or something. "Sex and attraction are weapons that we as Shinobi should be able and willing to use regardless of the situation."
"I've totally sucked up to a chick for a mission before, and sensei seduced this one innkeeper when we didn't have enough money once," Kiba grinned lewdly when he thought about whatever sex related things filled his mind. "But I thought the Kunoichi S-Ops did this kind of thing most of the time."
"We don't have a female member of the Seduction Operations with us now do we?" Shikamaru was starting to sound a little sarcastic. "Look, I want to at least start heading back home tonight so I'll do it. You can stick to the rooftops as back up. Hinata hand me one of the knockout pills." That said he started shrugging off his jacket. A transformation would work better than a simple henge and it was always better to work of off what you had, to use as little chakra as possible while still making the transformation as realistic as you could get it.
"Wait, you, the laziest person in Konoha, are going to actually seduce an enemy nin?" Kiba was snickering and nudging Naruto with his elbow, "so have you ever actually taken time out of your cloud watching to even kiss someone before?"
"Troublesome," he glared at the dog-nin, "sex is a weapon, we are tools of the Hokage, we are to use all weapons available to us for the sake of our village. I have been doing whatever necessary to complete my missions since we were twelve."
"You had sex when we were twelve," Naruto looks both shocked and a bit sick. "People wanted to have sex with you when you were twelve?"
"That is what a henge or a transformation jutsu is for. Troublesome," he finishes stripping down to his mesh shirt and boxers, pulls the hair tie out of his ponytail letting his hair fall down around his face, and starts forming hand symbols. "People like having sex with people of all ages, I haven't been a virgin since I was six."
As he finishes the sentence he also finishes the sequence of hand signals and in a silent puff of smoke where the teen was standing a hot twenty-something woman stands instead. Her brown hair is wavy and hangs almost halfway down her back, styled to look slightly disarrayed, like someone had been running his hands through the locks, but not quite enough to look purposeful. The boxers are now a sexy little miniskirt, with panties under it, and the mesh top is still mesh on the sleeves but a solid black across the now female chest and most of her stomach, it rides up leaving a little strip of smooth skin visible. The hair tie around her wrist is now a thick bracelet and the standard sandals they were all wearing are now high-heeled boots that conform to perfectly shaped calves and draw attention to her long shapely legs. Subtle eye shadow and eyeliner make her eyes look larger and shiny lip-gloss attracts eyes to her lush lips. All told he's both hot and completely unrecognizable.
Although he's obviously a really sexy woman Shikamaru was careful not to give himself too much chest, too wide hips, or even too beautiful of a face. Being too beautiful is a drawback; it tips the target off more often than not. You can't be the hottest thing to ever walk into the bar and pick-up a ninja without said ninja getting suspicious, and ninja are naturally very suspicious people. Also, while most boys would never even consider wearing make-up it would definitely be a tip-off that something was wrong if a normal, civilian, woman was out for a night on the town without it. Finally he tamps down on his chakra until his levels feel like an untrained civilian's would to anyone who might be able to sense it.
"Hinata, the pill please," she purrs in a slightly husky, for a woman, tone that's still much higher than Shikamaru's usual voice. Leaning around Neji and holding out a deceptively delicate hand to receive the knockout pill he pretends not to notice the slight blush and almost hidden stunned look on the older boy's face when their chests brush. Bending to fold his discarded clothes and stuff them in his pack he subtly rolls his body when he straightens, as if he's getting used to the female shape, and smirks at the uncomfortable looks on Naruto and Kiba's faces. Handing Kiba his pack he murmurs, "just another weapon," in the boy's ear and turns smoothly to waltz back into the town.
Maybe it makes the four, they left Akamaru back on the outskirts of town, following him on the rooftops uncomfortable to see how easily he can walk in six-inch heels but that's the point. It's the minute details that tell everyone that he is not a threat. Nobody can run in heels this high, at least not well and not without practice, and nobody who hasn't had practice can walk comfortably in them either. A nin wouldn't think to use make-up, at least not so subtle that it's clearly something they're used to applying, or to make sure just to be averagely beautiful. These are mistakes that beginner Seduction Ops members quickly learn not to make, that or they die, and Shikamaru may be lazy but he's a genius with a memory that never lets him forget even the smallest of details. He's learned far more than anyone knows about just about everything working in the Hokage Tower on the city defences and battle plans. Even before Asuma he would never let his teammates in harm's way if he could prevent it; Ino never had to seduce so much as an innkeeper for them.
Stumbling into the bar, as if the suddenly bright lights hurt his eyes, Shikamaru heads straight to the bar for a drink. At least one of the Hyugas is watching him through the back wall with their bloodline limit and the other two are stationed across the street where they can see in the front windows but they've already been told that at no point are they to reveal themselves unless he signals for them. The bartender, a busty brunette, looks sympathetic as he tosses back the fruity cocktail he ordered, his manner suggesting he's already most of the way to drunk, and not just because he's looking to have fun.
"Tough day?" She asks him.
"It always is with men," the disguised ninja grumbles before pushing back away from the bar. "Forget him, I'm gonna have fun." Her face smoothes into a slightly mischievous smile that looks a little put-on, like 'she' isn't too used to acting out, and Shikamaru weaves his way into the dancing crowd. He spends the next half-hour flirting with any man who seems interested, which is almost every man in the building, and dancing, or more accurately grinding, with every man who approaches him. The target and his comrades are here for the drink and maybe an easy sexual encounter; not the dancing and the shadow user can almost hear Kiba and Naruto whining about wasting time, in his head. But, if he could, he'd send back the message that it's important not to look too focused on your real target. Walking in, plopping down next to a nin in a bar, and flirting with him, or her, wasn't a good idea, unless they were clearly the most attractive person in there and you were clearly very drunk.
Finally, when he's worked up a bit of a sweat mostly from the heat of bodies all around, he staggers out of the crowd and into the seat next to the target that conveniently just opened up. Ordering another drink he smiles like he's actually been having fun, hah, moving around this much when he could be at home sleeping is never fun.
"How's trying to forget your man working out," bartender girl is a bit less sympathetic since he's been acting like a complete slut since he got here.
"He wanted a chance to date other women before getting serious." Biting his lip he takes a sip of the drink, leaving his full bottom lip glistening but still looking like it was an unconscious series of actions. "Psh, I'll show him exciting, I'm gonna sleep with the first guy who offers tonight! I can be in'resting too." Sounding drunker than ever and like an easy victim he can sense the man next to him perking up, the guy wasn't that great looking, add in the scar on his cheek and he probably preyed on a lot of drunken women looking for a rebound.
"Hey now," the bartender glares at the nin, it's obvious to her that he's trouble for the upset, smashed, woman in front of her. "That's not the kind of thing you want to do around here."
"You don't think I kin take care of mys'lf," he frowns at the other woman and spins to the man next to him. "What about you? I'm hot right?"
He smirks predatorily, "of course you are," leaning into Shikamaru's personal space the other man leers at him and looks him slowly up and down, very obviously checking 'her' out. "Want me to show you how sexy you are out back?"
He looks startled and a little hesitant, as if, until the woman behind the bar opens her mouth to warn one of them off the other. Quickly grabbing the man's hand and glaring in a drunken challenge at the bartender he clumsily drags the enemy ninja towards the door. The man sends a smirk back at his laughing comrades still sitting at the bar and Shikamaru pretends not to notice. When he stumbles, on purpose of course, over the threshold their roles switch, as he predicted they would, and the man pushes him into the alley and against the wall, initiating a kiss.
Kissing back he lets the target make his way down his jaw to suck at his neck. Moaning in, false, arousal he arches against the man and slips the knockout pill between his lips before pulling him back up into another kiss. As their tongues battle he slips the small pill unnoticed into the other nin's mouth. Breaking the kiss to gasp for air he doesn't really need he lets the other man go back to sucking on his neck and groping his ass while he waits the three minutes the pill takes to activate. Just as the man slips his hand beneath Shikamaru's shirt and up toward his breast he slumps against him, passed out for at least six hours.
Stepping back, allowing the target to fall heavily to the ground, and pulling his shirt down Shikamaru rifles through his pockets for the papers they need. Once he finds them he slides them up between his shirt and his skin, where they won't fall out. Pulling a kunai out from under his skirt, yes it took a ton of practice to learn how to act normally when you had a sharp weapon stashed so close to your privates even if they weren't male at the moment, he bent back over. Placing the weapon at the other man's throat he paused before slashing. He didn't have to kill the man. Shrugging to himself he lightly drew a line, ending in a music note suspiciously similar to the Sound Village symbol, across the man's throat. He'd wake-up knowing he could have been killed, that he'd been spared, and he'd have a shallow cut to remind him for a few days. It was psychological warfare, and it might delay the enemy longer than just killing him would, plus it'd send them towards sadistic Sound Kunoichi and not mostly male teams of Leaf Chunin.
Turning he jogs back toward the outskirts of town where they'd agreed to meet. It was just an extra precaution to make sure that when he transformed back into himself the chakra spike didn't alert the rest of the enemies that there were other ninja in the area. Once he was far enough away Neji silently jumped down next to him and Shikamaru slipped the documents out of his shirt and handed them over, shadows don't lie and there was Neji's shadow. The Hyuga rolled them up and hid them in his pack before jumping away without a word. Finally he made it back to the meeting place, all his teammates were waiting silently, releasing the jutsu he sighed happily to get his own body and clothes back, high heels sucked. Snatching his pack from Kiba he pulled out his pants and quickly put them on.
After redressing he stepped away from the group, who were all still staring at him like they'd never met him before. Sticking two fingers down his throat he gagged and threw-up the contents of his stomach, trying to get as much of the one and a half drinks he'd had out of his system as possible as well as get rid of the enemy ninja's taste. Hinata, who with her medical training was probably the first to catch on, shuffled some things around and pulled a roll out of her bag and handed it to him along with a canteen of water.
"Thanks," he rasped before rinsing his mouth out and wolfing down the roll. Handing her the canteen he pulled his hair efficiently back into its usual ponytail and straightened into his favourite slouch. Aside from the contents of his stomach on the ground next to him and the bruise on his neck it looked almost like nothing had happened and they were still planning how to get the target alone. "Alright, lets get going. If we don't stop we can reach that cave by dawn. A few hours of rest and we can get those papers to the Hokage by tomorrow afternoon."
With that he jumped into the trees and sensed them following him. Maybe the silence meant his teammates weren't going to bother him about what he'd said and done tonight. Most likely they were just still processing it. How they'd managed to get this far without needing to use more subtle methods of getting close to the enemy…actually it didn't surprise him that much seeing as two of them were the most impulsive, 'jump directly into battle,' ninjas alive. They probably didn't even understand that sometimes it was easier, safer, and faster to seduce someone to get into their home than to try to break-in. It was way easier to kill someone when they didn't have bodyguards around, or when they were aroused and undressing than when they were alert and on guard. Neji probably understood the strategy and reasoning behind it and Hinata had to have sat through a basic seduction training-course at the academy even if she never used it. He really shouldn't have let his temper run away with his mouth like that.
Naruto and Kiba would probably be all over him asking troublesome questions as soon as they reached the cave. Wincing he thought about how much he'd revealed before even showing them how good he could be at seduction. His best asset, besides his brain, was that people underestimated him so much. Being a genius he knew how dangerous the life of a ninja would be if he actually never trained; he could think of thousands of ways to die in less than two minutes. Tonight he'd let them know that he wasn't just the lazy slacker he liked to pretend to be. If only they knew he was just as good at seduction as a man, and he understood how to work either gender too, it was all about people reading. As long as he looked at everything in a clinical manner he was set.
Eventually they reached the cave they'd camped in on the way there and stopped to set up camp inside. While he collected enough firewood for a small fire, just to cook breakfast on, he considered his options. He could lie but Kiba would most likely smell it if he did, or he could tell the truth. It wasn't like they could do anything over ten years after the fact, and Clan Justice was something everyone but Naruto would immediately understand. Not getting to spend time with a deer, an intelligent Nara deer, that one in the woods two mornings ago didn't count and it was so skittish it ran away when Neji started waking-up, in over a week was making him even more irritable than the lack of sleep which was probably why he said so much earlier. He'd have to tell the Hokage what a bad idea sending him on back-to-back missions was when they got home.
"Shikamaruuu, hurry uuuup," Naruto called as he made his way back to camp, setting traps behind him.
Sighing as he heaved the wood into the fire pit as if he'd been carrying an overly heavy load he yawned and flopped down on the ground, "so troublesome. What?"
"Y-you said s-s-six," Hinata offered timidly. She usually didn't stutter anymore unless she was feeling really, really, nervous or awkward.
"I did." He left it at that, if they wanted to know all his personal business he was going to at least make them say it. Akamaru whined as Kiba fidgeted and held himself back.
"You said you haven't been a virgin since you were SIX!" Naruto shouted, causing Kiba and his dog to cringe away from their loud friend. "You can't just say that kind of thing!"
"Why not? It's the truth," Shikamaru frowned at Naruto's insensitivity; he really needed to work on that.
"Well what the hell happened? And who do we need to kill," Kiba growled and Akamaru joined in.
Letting out a short harsh laugh he grinned and a more vicious expression than anyone had ever seen on the laidback ninja crossed his face. "Oh he's dead. The Herd takes care of its young."
"Like our Pack?" Kiba perked up. It was well known that the Inuzuka were so close, and so similar to their dogs, that the Clan often referred to each other as Pack. However while it was well known that the Nara's were close to the deer they raised, and most of them had a pact with the deer summons, not too many outside the family got to learn how closely they associated themselves with the creatures.
"Yes." It was true. The Nara deer were just as intelligent as the dogs raised by the Inuzuka, they just weren't as useful in battle year-round since they had to shed their antlers each year. But they helped in other ways at home, finding important medicinal plants, watching children, carrying messages, helping the Naras train, and so much more. Deer were a part of the family on the Nara compound, or maybe it was the Naras that were a part of the herd, deer with thumbs.
"Wait, what? What are we talking about now?" Leave it to Naruto to need everything spelled out to him.
"When I was six a distant member of our Clan raped me while both my parents were out on missions. He did it a few more times before my dad came home early and caught him. Dad called The Herd, that's the whole Clan and the deer, together and gathered everyone in the large field to deliver justice." That vicious look was back for a moment as he remembered what had happened that day; it had gone a long way toward giving him closure. "Dad held him in place with shadows and my mother handed me a kunai and told me to slit his throat. I was seven by then, and he was my first kill. Later she explained how it might have been a terrible thing but sex was used as a weapon and since I already knew about it I now had more weapons to use than everyone else my age."
Kiba was nodding in satisfaction, it was only right that he, as the heir of the Clan, Herd or Pack, took back power by killing his attacker himself, and he understood that on an instinctual level. Neji and Hinata looked a little taken aback by the bloodthirstiness of a clan that would have a seven year old child murder someone in cold blood, the Hyuga tended to leave everything to the Head of the Clan, but still they seemed to understand the necessity of justice within the Clan. Naruto however just looked stunned.
"That's kind of harsh isn't it? To just tell you to get over it and use your body as a weapon from now on," not that he would know, having never had parents, but Shikamaru's mother sounded so, cold was the best way to put it.
"But it was true, and now I'm a better Shinobi," he shrugged, Naras were usually very reserved people, his dad was a bit of an exception, and he understood his mother's view. It was the way they were, life was about survival and everything could be, should be, taken as a lesson on how to survive more. Predators took out the weak and the sick first. "I'll take first watch," he slouched over to the mouth of the cave and jumped into the trees around them.
"I think," Neji spoke calmly after a few minutes of awkward silence, "there may be more than just his intelligence that qualified him to be considered for Jonin already."
And none of them were overly surprised when a month later Shikamaru was promoted to Jonin rank. A year later when he was recruited to ANBU, well it was a secret but when he started having a lot of missions that he wouldn't tell anyone about and higher-up Shinobi like Ibiki started giving him the time of day everyone knew the truth, it still wasn't too shocking. They were each sure he had even more hidden depths than they knew, probably more than they would ever know. If it was shocking that he was able to stay the same laidback, bored, cloud loving guy, well, he once told Kiba he just needed to learn to compartmentalize when they were assigned to track down a child murderer.
AN: So I've got a document for each show, book, or whatever I like that lists story ideas and prompts I've thought of. But I end up writing them because I don't know anyone who will write them for me. So this was based off of a prompt I wrote, I've got tons just based on Shikamaru since he was/is my favourite character (probably because he reminded me of myself and how I was smart but just did enough work to get by: he did the same thing and still turned out an awesome ninja (there's hope for my future yet)). I'm going to put the prompt below and ask that anyone who wants to attempt their own version please do and tell me so I can read it.
Prompt: A group of the rookie nine, or eleven, are talking about having to use sex to seduce a target, they're only 16 after all, and the only girl in the group is an unsure virgin (Hinata, her father would never allow her to have sex with anyone other than her eventual husband) when Shikamaru says he'll henge himself into a woman and do it. This sparks shock and disbelief that he could pull it off and he carelessly tells them he hasn't been a virgin since he was 6 and a distant cousin, or something, raped him. Of course the herd is very protective of their young and a year later when his father came home early from a mission and found out what was happening, well. "'Nara Clan Justice,' he was my first kill." Shikamaru is very unconcerned about it and tells them that sex is just another tool for them to utilize as ninja and he's been doing it for years, as either gender, to avoid unnecessary conflict or to easily infiltrate a target's home. He proceeds to transform into a dark sexy woman (she's definitely in her twenties) and prove he can pull it off by making all of the other boys uncomfortably aroused before waltzing into the bar their target is in and luring him into an alley outside the bar, letting the target (a dangerous enemy ninja) push him against the wall, he slips the target a knockout pill with his tongue and a few minutes later when the man slumps over he calmly slits his throat and takes the papers they need. Everyone realizes that maybe there're more than just the obvious reasons he's the only one their age being considered for promotion to Jonin.
Read and Review because I've got all my stories already, I don't need to post them, but if someone likes one or asks for more then I'll post more for them.