Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha so don't sue me.
A/N: This fanfiction is written purely for entertainment purposes. If you have a thing against my writing, feel free to criticize but please refrain from flaming. Thank you.
Chapter One: The Annoying Guest, Secretive Door, and Anomalous Schoolmates (But Not Necessarily in That Order)
"Hands up and don't you dare turn around."
Bed half-made before her, Kagome Higurashi raised her arms with a casual slowness belying her panicked frame-of-mind. The commanding voice was frighteningly rough and hard, and it was all she could do not to faint right then and there. A thief in the house? A burglar? Was this a robbery of some kind, or a kidnapping?
A fraction of a second later, however, the element of surprise wore off as rationality returned.
The something hard poking at her back did not feel like the circular imprintation of the barrel of a gun. Neither did it feel like the sharp tip of a knife. In fact, what kind of burglary/kidnapping occurred at 7 am?
"Sou-Ta," she managed through gritted as she spun around to meet a grinning boy around the height of her waist. A poke in the stomach brought her gaze down to the banana in his left hand. In his right, a voice-disguising contraption laid innocently in his grasp. "Grow up!" she roared as she realized his little prank.
"Don't cha want to know where I got 'em?" the boy chirped happily.
"No. I don't."
"Well, I ordered the voice disguiser on the internet. It's wicked cool!"
"And I don't care!"
"Hm, and the banana, well--" The grin grew larger and threatened to fall off his face, "If you really want it, there's one more in the kitchen. Makes a really good hold-up weapon, huh?"
"SOUTA!!!"
With a gleeful squeal, the boy took off from the bedroom in a full out sprint and locked himself in the bathroom before the girl could get close. "Better get ready for school, Ka-go-me!!"
With one final murderous glare to the locked bathroom door, the girl shuffled back to her room. With that little incident just now, all the haze left over from the night's rest was definitely gone. All that was left was morning grumpiness. Not everybody could be a morning person.
Kagome finished making her bed and changed her clothes, all the while listening for short mischievous boys and their god-awful pranks. At last, it was time to freshen up in the bathroom. She twisted the doorknob to find it stuck. Of course. Souta was still in there.
"Souta. Get out of the bathroom," she said with admirable patience.
No response.
"Souta, you've been in the bathroom for the past five minutes. You're not a girl. Don't tell me you're brushing your hair and touching up on your make-up."
No response.
"Souta. Just get out of the bathroom. I have to get to school in thirty minutes."
No response.
"Souta, are you... hurt?" She was suddenly concerned. Now that she thought about it, there hadn't been a peep out of the incredibly loud boy for the past seven minutes, an amazingly unreal occurrence.
"BOO!" The door suddenly swung open. The loud yell made Kagome jump just a little until the sight of a small grinning face made her eyes narrow in annoyance. "Worried 'bout me, were ya?" the boy asked smartly.
"Like hell," Kagome mumbled as she quickly jerked the boy out of the bathroom before he could close the door again. "Next time, terrorize the bathroom downstairs."
"Aww. 'Gome. But that's no fun!"
"No, it's lots of fun when I get more than three minutes of peace without the definite risk of a heart attack three seconds later. Go bother Mom." With that, she shut the door in his face and went about her morning routine.
Fifteen minutes later found Kagome at the breakfast table. Her mom was sitting at the table, calmly reading the newspaper. With a soft "pop," the toast was ready and Kagome quickly grabbed it before Souta could snatch it. From the corner of her eye, Kagome's mom was watching everything.
"Now Kagome, be mature. Souta's a guest. Share the toast," Kagome's mother remarked casually in that mother-tone as she turned the page of the newspaper.
"Mom, be reasonable. I have to get to school in less than fifteen minutes and Souta doesn't even start school until an hour later!"
"That doesn't mean you should be a rude host."
Kagome sighed and handed a slice of golden-brown bread to her "guest."
Souta stuffed the toast into his mouth, and after receiving a disgusted "Gross!" from Kagome, eyed her thoughtfully. "Speaking of being a good host," he started, "I'd like to get to my school an hour early to take a look at everything since it's the first day of school. Perhaps you can drive me."
Eyes wide as saucers, Kagome sputtered indignantly. "But-- you have a bus to take you there! And I walkto school! I don't want to drive."
"Kagome..." her mother said in a don't-get-me-started voice that fore-warned of an incredibly long lecture about the responsibilities of being a host.
"Put on your shoes," Kagome seethed through gritted teeth.
Since the unfortunate day her mother's friend had been diagnosed with breast cancer, said friend's son, Souta, had been staying at her house. While the thought of sharing the house and her mother hadn't been terribly unbearable, the guest, Souta, was. Sure, Kagome could sympathize with him, his only parent hospitalized with cancer. Her own mother had once undergone the very same misfortune; but ever since she'd met Souta, he'd been nothing but a complete brat. From harmless pranks to jokes of nerve-wrecking seriousness like the one that very morning, he had never once left her alone.
So there she was, toast in mouth, sock-covered feet half-stuffed in sneakers, backpack half slung over one shoulder, rushing out of a brick red house.
" 'Gome, the door's locked!" whined Souta as he tugged repeatedly on the handle of the passenger seat for emphasis.
Kagome dug in a pocket for her car keys. "Stop that, you're gonna kill the car," she managed to mumble around her toast as she unlocked the car.
"Uh-uh, no you don't." Kagome threw her backpack on the passenger seat before Souta could get a chance to slip in.
"I'm the GUEST." Souta stretched his arm to toss the backpack into the backseats.
"But you're still short enough that the air bag would smother you." The backpack went back on the passenger seat.
"Then drive responsibly!" The abused backpack went flying into the backseat. With a buckle of his seat belt, the young boy slammed the car door shut and looked to his slack-mouthed host. "Well? I haven't got all day. And if I'm not mistaken, you don't either."
Crap. Down to ten minutes. She was probably going to miss the opening ceremony.
The drive to Souta's middle school was unbelievably quiet with Kagome glancing at her watch every five seconds. Seven minutes later, they pulled up at the empty school. "Get off. You're here," said Kagome, eyes fixated on her watch.
"Um... 'Gome?"
She spared a glance up. "Yes?" He was severely testing her patience.
"I need to go back for my backpack."
"SOUTA!!!" She barely managed to restrain herself from strangling the all-important "guest."
"Hey, I'm sorry. But you're gonna be late anyways and you can't leave me here without my backpack on the first day of school."
"Souta," Kagome started after five seconds of deep breathing, "I swear you're the most annoying guest Mom and I ever had."
"I try," he grinned.
The drive back to the house was much more relaxed with the radio on and the windows down. Kagome figured that since, like Souta said, she would be late anyways, it wouldn't matter just how late she was, would it?
"Go get your backpack." They were back at the house.
Kagome smiled as the middle-schooler ran off into the house. Well, just cuz she was already late, didn't mean she couldn't get Souta back. With a happy sigh and a step of the gas pedal, she was off toward her school without an annoying brat to worry about. She hoped with just reason that he would be awfully pissed to find that he'd been ditched.
Just as she had expected, the school gates were closed and the late bell had probably already rung. With no other choice in the matter, Kagome headed for the nearest supermarket to find a parking space. She sighed as she got out of her car and slammed the door. First day of 10th grade at a new school and already, things were going bad. She supposed she could blame everything on her guest, but the teachers would likely see it the same way they would the excuse, "my dog ate my homework."
"We just had to move to this district this summer while passing by this local hospital and coincidentally meet Souta's mother during an innocent walk that just happened to pass by her sickroom. And Mom just had to stop when she saw the name of her old time friend printed across the tag by the door... Okay, well maybe Mom couldn't be blamed for that, but she just had to offer to take care of Souta!... Okay... so Souta's only relative was stuck in the hospital with no job and a whole shitload of medical expenses but... well, I guess Kagome's just the one who always has to suffer."
A cart pusher from the supermarket passed her with an odd look in her direction.
"Awesome. Now even the cart pusher thinks I'm insane. I'm liking this day already."
'Maybe... just maybe, I should stop talking to myself... at least out loud,' she thought to herself with a sigh.
A five minute walk and two hills later, the high school finally came into view again. As expected, the gate was still locked. The closer she walked, the lower her gut sank.
"So... hello Mr. Gate," Kagome mumbled as she came nose to bar with the tall, tall gate. "How, oh, how, will I get past you?"
As the thought that talking to the gate probably wasn't the smartest and timeliest method of getting past it struck her ingenious mind, Kagome caught signs of movement to her left. Other than the gate, the school was a fortress guarded by a circle of wall just as tall and sturdy as said gate. It really didn't bode well for our miserable heroine. However, it's always times like these that a miracle, or beam of hope if you will, shines through (in this case, the wall). As the wall was covered quite beautifully in thick ivy, Kagome spotted a beam of light that peeked through what seemed to be a hole behind the vines. She brushed aside the plants to find a life-saving hole the height of her chest. Years of limbo experience from elementary school came into effect now as she passed through the hole to meet a huge bush. Well that figured, seeing as how the hole was there and yet undiscovered by the authorities. But bush or no, she knew she needed to be getting to the opening ceremony.
"Ah, so you finally decided to stop chatting with the gate and use the conveniently placed tunnel, huh?"
Kagome turned around to meet the master of the voice that had so rudely pulled her out of her musings. It was a girl, chocolate brown eyes sparkling with unrestrained amusement. "Well, it's nice to know you saw me chatting to my first friend at Jewel High, whom I'm sure you knew couldn't tell me about this 'conveniently placed tunnel'."
The girl shrugged, "Hey, I just figured that if you were stupid enough not to search for another entrance or blind enough not to see me walk right through, you didn't have the right to use the sacred 'Conveniently Placed Tunnel,' CPT for short."
"And here I am, not quite blind enough to not see you walk through the sacred CPT. Glad to know I passed the test."
"Yes, well, I most definitely gave you some extra help. How will you repay me?" Her eyes sparkled merrily.
Kagome dug into her pocket and reached out with nothing. "Sorry, no loot. I'll tell you my sacred name; it's Kagome, and if you really want more for payment, I suppose I could perhaps allow you to carry my bookbag all the way to the opening ceremony which I'm quite certain we're both missing."
"Ha!" The girl pretended to scoff and burst out laughing. "Name's Sango by the way. And I'll have you know that the opening ceremony is something that most people try to miss."
"Why?" Kagome was stumped and it must have showed on her face for Sango burst out into another bout of laughter. Even though she didn't know for the life of her why this girl before her was laughing, she couldn't resist a smile as she considered the easy-going girl. They could easily get along.
Sango's dark brown hair dropped past her shoulders in a considerably fashionable style. She gave off an elegant and mature air as well... that is, when she wasn't bent over laughing. When the girl finally recovered and sobered, Kagome asked with a patient smile, "Finished laughing at my expense?" and the laughter began all over again.
"First you talk to the gate and then you want to head to the opening ceremony. This must be your first year at Jewel High," said Sango after she finished expressing her amusement.
"That obvious?" Kagome asked with a grimace.
Sango looked down at her watch. "Hey, there's around fifteen minutes of the opening ceremony left. If you really want, we can go take a look and you'll understand what I mean."
"Mhm."
The two stepped out from behind the bush and headed for the mammoth building that was their school.
"This is a public high school, isn't it?" Kagome asked, slightly overwhelmed by the sheer size as they approached. It did not look any smaller from up close.
Sango chuckled a bit. "Of course it is. It just happens to be a very big public high school, that's all."
A great many twist and turns later, Sango and Kagome stopped before a large gilded door that somehow reminded Kagome of some fantasy novel or other. Except, it must have been a fantasy with an utterly horrific sense of artistry because it was painted a stunning gold with brown and orange streaks of color in random places. Oh, and did she mention the giant purple hippopotamus carved in the center of the door?
"That is," Kagome said, staring at the door, "just... um... wow."
Sango chuckled. "Yeah. 'Wow' is one of the mildest words used to describe it. Inuyasha said something along the lines of 'Is this really a fin' door?' and Miroku, if I recall correctly, said 'Frickin' awesome! Must've been Michelangelo at work!'"
Kagome wrinkled her nose. "I think I'll just stick with 'wow.' It's a lot more ambiguous in case I change my mind later; that is, supposing I do change my mind. Are you sure it's safe to touch?"
"If you mean 'is the artistry contagious?' I'll be very sad to tell you that Miroku tried, but came away unsuccessful." Nevertheless, Sango eyed the door distastefully. "I still can't believe it's real after seeing it everyday for the past year."
Before Sango and Kagome could decide on which was to be the unfortunate person to open the door, and thus come in contact with it, the door was suddenly pulled open from the inside. Out sprinted two guys, one after the other. They seemed to be running from something that was still in the room, but when they saw Sango, they froze.
"Sango, where the f were you?!" demanded one of the guys, his silver hair shimmering in the light that beamed through the stained glass window across the hall. Amber eyes flashed annoyance as they happened to catch a passing glance of the large door he had just moments before utilized. As Kagome looked to see the other guy staring wistfully and... dare she imagine it... admiringly at the door. It was at that moment that she decided the black haired guy admiring the door had to be Miroku and the silver haired one possibly Inuyasha.
"I had to walk my little brother to school. You know it's his first year at the middle school," Sango replied nonchalantly, ignoring the silver haired guy's coarse language.
"Doesn't the middle school commence much later?" the guy that Kagome guessed to be Miroku asked, gaze abandoning the door in favor of Sango. Not that Kagome could blame him. Sango's was much more pleasing to the eye than that horrendous door.
"It does," Sango confirmed. "He just said he wanted to check it out earlier since it's his first day and everything."
Kagome resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Didn't her "guest" say the same thing this very morning? Although, she was almost a hundred percent sure that Sango's brother actually meant it and was not just trying to annoy his sister. Then, she remembered that she'd ditched him back at the house and her mood improved emphatically.
"Well that's awesome and everything, but Miroku and I forgot our keys and we got found out," said the silver haired guy.
"You don't mean..." Sango trailed off and her eyes widened as the two nodded grimly. "Oh god. I told you guys to lock it before summer break. And now it's too late. Well... who found it?"
"You see, we don't know," said Miroku.
"We fing ran for the door as soon as we saw heard the door creak."
Sango visibly paled. "Then what're we doing here? Let's go before the person decides to check out here!"
The group moved down the hallway until they reached an ordinary looking door that led to an ordinary room... that is, an ordinary ballroom found in ancient European manors. The whole school was absurd.
When the door was safely closed behind them, the silver haired guy suddenly asked, "Who the f is she?"
Kagome shifted her gaze to fit him in her line of sight and saw that he was staring at her. "I'm Kagome," she replied in response.
The guy looked at her like she had three heads. Sango sighed and stepped forward to put a hand on Kagome's shoulder. "She's with me. I picked her up as she... caught me using the CPT."
The amused expression was back in her eyes as Kagome looked at her with mock indignity, eyes saying 'You better not tell them I was talking to the gate.'
"I'm Miroku. Pleased to make your acquaintance," said the black haired guy. She was right; damn she was good.
Then, he held out his hand, palm up.
Kagome eyed it with a wary expression, then settled her hand into what she assumed to be a sideways handshake (if those even existed), and mumbled an articulate, "Um yeah, same here."
She was completely unprepared for what came next. Miroku bent over to kiss the back of her hand. Then, using her hand as an anchor, pulled her towards him. Disoriented, Kagome fell with her back against his chest and he wrapped his arms around her waist, still holding her hand. This was not happening. Or if it was, then this was one queer district, not to mention school. It was only fitting that the students were strange too, right?
Before Miroku could complete a motion that Kagome thought faintly resembled a perverted rub of her chest, Sango stormed in and whacked him on the forehead with a backpack. Kagome ducked as the bag bounced off Miroku's head and she narrowly missed a knock to the head herself.
While Miroku rubbed his forehead, Kagome took the chance to inch far, far away from him.
Sango now had Miroku's ear in her hand. Kagome winced as she knew what would happen next. Sango twisted. Oh yes, she twisted as hard as she could. A loud squeal more girly than Kagome thought she could ever manage made its way from his lips. As Kagome winced away from the scene, she caught sight of the silver haired guy who stood leaning against the wall, watching the scene with faint amusement. "He fin' had it coming," he remarked to her as he noticed her eyes on him.
Kagome rubbed her forehead, ironically similar to Miroku's earlier action. She could feel one gigantic headache coming on, larger than a knock to the head could have caused. "So," she said nonchalantly, "who are you." She stared at the guy casually perched against the wall.
"Inuyasha," he said flippantly like he didn't want to talk to her while the scene between Sango and Miroku was still going on. Point two for Kagome. Who's the master of guessing people?
"So," Kagome said loudly, cutting through the squeals that were still coming from the dark haired male. "What was that about a key... or rather your lack of one?"
Sango abruptly released her hold on Miroku's ear. "Ah. The key."
"Do you happen to know what's behind that heavenly door, my lady?" Miroku asked, surprisingly recovered from his previous ordeal.
"No."
"It's a music room," Miroku explained. "At least, that's what it's supposed to be. No one ever uses it. But alas, we discovered it and decided to use it as a sort of headquarters or 'hideout' if you will.
"However, the teachers found out that we were using it for... unpure purposes and decided to lock it down during school hours. So, what could we do? We loved that room! The obvious solution was, of course, to go to the classroom next door. We found the closet that coincidentally shared a wall with our beloved room. Then... well..." Miroku trailed off, thinking of the appropriate words to say.
"What he's trying to say," Inuyasha continued where Miroku left off, "is that we fin' blew a hole in the closet and inserted a door to lead from that classroom to our hideout."
Kagome stared at them incredulously. They freakin' blew a hole in the wallof the school?! It was... she grinned... Unbelievably brilliant.
Then, Sango decided to add her thoughts on the matter. "Yes, and that went well and all until some two idiots decided not to lock up before summer and forgot their keys. Now, someone's discovered not only that there's a door in the closet of the room next door, but that said door leads to our hideout!"
"Sango, chill," said Inuyasha. "Let's just go to the fing classroom next to the hideout and open the 'secret door.' If there's someone in there, we can just pretend we just discovered it and if there isn't, then we'll just lock the door right now."
"Alright," Sango agreed and the group set off for the gilded door again.
The "secret door" was closed. It was even locked. And when Sango unlocked it, there was no one in the former music room. And even though Kagome had to admit the room was pretty cool with various interesting items strewn around disorderly, there was a problem. The problem came in the form of a piece of paper stuck to the music room side of the "secret door" that read "THIS HOLE IN THE WALL WILL BE SEALED PROMPTLY AFTER SCHOOL."
"Aw," Inuyasha groaned. "Now we have to blast another hole!"
To Be Continued...
A/N: This has got to be the most bizarre thing I've ever written.