A/N - Dedicated to Maria. You've asked me for this since the finale and I finally have completed it. Happy reading, everyone. Thanks for sticking around and sorry about deleting FFF. Anyway, on with the show!
XX
It didn't have to be that way.
Over and over again her life was bombarded with the obvious disappointments when love came circling around. Like crows, the feeling would present itself and feed on her heart as the darkness fought against it. Ripping at the seams and attempting to destroy a caged organ that had been broken before. That had lost a loved one twice. Those shaking hands would provide some clarity as how emotions would envelope her and shatter whatever hope was left.
Until she fell in love with her.
There were days when that distinct shade of blonde hair would turn red painted lips upwards and she would slip into pleasing daydreams. Lifting those high heels onto her desk, a woman who had been cut down by chances taken in love would find that emerald eyes captivated a dizzy mind. The smell of red leather and vanilla. The way the younger woman would present herself boldly and state those opinions without backing down. The beginning of a chain of drama between them that never died down but evolved into so much more.
Regina could remember the precise time when she began to gaze upon Emma as more than an acquaintance.
Love can happen at the most ridiculous times. When our hearts are racing because of fear and someone lends a hand to comfort. When our minds are elsewhere and a stranger silently sits down nearby. Then your eyes meet and something happens. Something could happen between two close friends suddenly that awakens a lifetime of feelings. Or maybe…
Maybe you could be standing at the town line, about to possibly say your last words to another woman and maybe you could just fall in love.
Regina stalled near the library, wondering why in the world she was traversing the streets of Storybrooke at that hour of the night. Somewhere in the distance, a wolf howled. Then there was the clatter of metal and a cat yowled. The moon's rays cascaded upon the glimpse of trees just on the border of the small territory she had called home for years. And a swinging sign just outside the shoemaker's shop creaked.
She had a sister close to her heart.
She had a very close confidante in Snow.
Everyone else were acquaintances that moved from tolerating her company to accepting it as normal.
And yet…
Those brown eyes latched onto the side-walk ahead and knee high black boots slapped upon the concrete as she continued walking.
We must always muster up enough courage at the beginning of every day to proceed. To step into territories that provided no clues as to what might happen. The unfolding of drama after drama in a small town that contained an assortment of characters from between the pages of books. All of them were uniquely linked to a definite past. But then there could be the possibility that the one woman whose world stepped off those pages could be just the person her heart would yearn for.
Could you love someone and never become fully aware of the depth of your feelings until someone else steps up to stand by their side?
Her steps slowed down as that stinging heart felt heavier and those fingertips although contained within black gloves grew numb.
How long could someone tolerate the pain originating from having the very person who made your heart skip a beat, be taken by someone else?
Her breaths had become measured since Robin passed away. There were nights when she couldn't sleep because of the sickening feeling of being captured in an icy tomb. Sometimes reading would help but then a certain line would remind her of how unfair love could be. Of how you could find love in someone labelled as your soul mate, but know deep down inside that you didn't have just one. That there were two. And even when you might have believed that you would mourn for a long time after death, the feelings attached to the other one quickly soothed the pain.
Daniel had become a thing of the past but never forgotten. Although her heart would often-times find similarities in Emma, she would brush them aside to focus on the fact that a woman's love would never be compared to a man's. When he had been her heart's desire at a young age, maturity developed those needs and desires within her that forced a broken woman to seek so much more. Things that composed of deepened connections and everything else that happened after you've had your heart broken for the first time.
When Robin died, she wasn't prepared for the pain. But knowing that that one other person existed in the same world as she did; Regina's grief didn't last for a long time. Knowing that you could at least cast your eyes upon another person who meant the world to you. Knowing that every single day, she could purposely seek out that individual and stay close. To feel some of her warmth. To linger in her presence and exchange words. To open up like she had never done.
Tears glistened in those brown eyes when she remembered how their fingers had brushed in New York. When they drove in one car side by side, glanced at each other and smiled. When Emma bought her a salad and they slipped onto a bench under a shed just outside a book-store. Something that almost felt like a date to her as Henry would label it. Something that proved to her that she meant something to someone.
"I thought you could use something to eat…"
She felt a warm hand take a hold of her right shoulder and lifted those brown eyes to meet emerald ones. Just a touch. Something that created butterflies within her chest immediately.
When the plastic container was considered and then taken, the sight of diced vegetables and greens made her toes curl.
"Also got you a fruit juice," Emma said with a smile, "because I know how you're always on the 'Stay Healthy' regime."
"If you tried it," Regina said smirking at the blonde's extra cheesy burger, "you wouldn't regret the change."
Emma huffed out a sigh as she sat too close to the brunette who considered the feel of their thighs pressed together as momentarily exhilarating.
"I've been eating like this since I got out of jail to be honest," Swan confessed, chewing on her burger. Brown eyes latched onto a fair right cheek and a deep gaze was enacted. "I mean, being in the foster system was hell. Some days I didn't get anything to munch on. So when I began to make a living on my own, I kind of fell in love with fast food."
"Those calories aren't entirely beneficial in such large quantities on a daily basis," Regina stated, sticking her fork into a slice of tomato. "Perhaps if you considered my options, you might find that a veggie burger can be just as tasty as a meaty one."
"No chicken?" Emerald orbs widened as their eyes met. "I can't live without chicken."
"I'm not saying that you should live without it." Quickly Regina lowered her eyes as her heart fluttered. "I'm having a salad that has chicken cubes inside. Am I not?"
Emma wasn't convinced. "I kind of prefer a chunk of meat between two buns."
Smirking, the brunette shook her head and glanced away. "You're such a kid, Miss Swan. Sometimes I am left to wonder if you will ever grow up."
The younger woman licked ketchup off the corner of her lips and grinned. "Growing up is no fun."
"No wonder Guyliner prances after you like a child in school, fuelled by hormones," Regina allowed her emotions to come forth. "I bet that your playful side wins him over."
"Nah, he's not that childish as you might think," Emma defended Hook whilst she studied her yellow bug parked a few feet away. "He's got his moments."
"Like pining after you every time your eyes connect," the brunette's chest ached from the thought of seeing the younger woman anywhere next to the other man.
"Look, this is all new to me, you know? I mean, after…Neal I never thought that I'd love anyone else. Or give them a chance. But I kind of did. And I've made up my mind that I'm going to pull through this whatever happens. So yeah. It kind of challenges me around every turn, trusting someone again. But I'm getting the hang of it."
Regina hadn't realized that she had stopped eating. The white plastic fork remained between her fingers and those brown eyes stared at nothing in particular.
"So he's the one," she found herself saying in a rather low tone that cracked a bit.
"If you're talking about that soul mate thing or something along the lines of True Love, then I'm not sure I even believe in that fairytale mumbo jumbo. But he could be."
The brunette inhaled slowly through those parted lips and felt her shattered heart burn from a fire that could only grow worst when reminded of the truth.
"Of course," she said and swallowed.
Emerald eyes had been focused on her for quite some time and then they were diverted eventually. Seconds of silence elapsed between them. Silence that contained no words but the sound of traffic and pedestrians moving by. However, whilst the world was all colors and sounds to the blonde, Regina's own had gone dimmer and placed on mute. She was only aware of her heart beating slowly. Then the feel of being suffocated from reality as if nothing could ever make her feel like living freely again.
"I wonder if he really loves her," Emma said some time after, her eyes focused on the Pizza Palace just across the street where their son was sharing a snack with his new love interest.
Regina had completely allowed her mind to drift farther into a gray world where happiness never seemed possible again.
"Violet is a nice kid," the blonde smiled as the burger wrapping was balled up between her fingers. "Considering that he's been following her around a lot. I'd say that he's pretty much attached."
"Love does that to people," Regina finally said in a very hoarse voice that suggested an excess of emotions rippling through her.
"Does what?" Emma studied the brunette's face.
"It makes you desire the other person's company as if their very existence keeps you alive." Brown eyes blinked slowly as her salad grew softer from specks of water droplets within the plastic container.
"Is that how you feel now?" Emma tried a softer voice, "now that he's gone? Do you feel…as if you can't go on without him?"
"His loss has saddened me," Regina said in a softer tone that was almost drowned out by the sound of traffic. The blonde found herself reading those red painted lips. "And although I am still mourning his death, it doesn't place me in hell as heartbreak once did before."
"Gold said that this time losing someone didn't break you as much as it did before," the blonde provided. "That's true then?"
"Yes," the older woman nodded once, still not making eye contact.
"But why?" Emma was still puzzled by the lack of belief on Gold's part that losing Robin couldn't destroy Regina. "What did he mean by that exactly?"
It took a few seconds for her to even formulate a response. And when she did, the brunette deliberately selected words that would not hint the obvious but would vaguely inform the other woman about her current position.
"I have other things to live for."
Emma nodded. "Henry."
"True," the brunette inhaled deeply and hugged the plastic container to her midsection. "But he's not the only source in my life that I attach my heart to. In more ways than one, when it comes to love, it never truly dies when your heart still beats for someone or something else."
Still puzzled and completely hateful of riddles, the blonde awaited further clarity. When none was provided, she hung her head and replayed the words.
"Do you know that when you lost Robin, I really and truly believed that I was going to lose you too?" Emma's slumped shoulders and legs parted suggested that she was in the mood to confess.
The brunette studied the other woman's posture and felt the impact of those words.
"I know that I didn't say much back in Neal's place when you emptied out your heart to me," the blonde confessed. "But I was trying to think up of how to say what I wanted to say and before I got the chance to, we were out of there. This reminds me of how I felt about Lily so much. You constantly remind me of Lily and it's pretty scary at times."
"Maleficent's daughter," Regina stated, "the fire breathing young woman who wanted to kill your parents."
"Well you can make fireballs happen and you wanted to kill my parents so you see my point…" Their eyes connected and Emma smiled. "But not that part exactly. I'm talking about when we were kids. She was in love with this girl back in the days when I grew attached to her and then something happened that changed her."
"Lily is gay?" Regina stared at the blonde.
Emma shrugged. "Nah, I think she's bisexual. Because there were guys too. We used to swoon over Richard Gere and Johnny Depp so…"
The older woman rolled her eyes and glanced away.
"Anyway, so the girl she had a thing for ended up dying in an accident. It was pretty tragic. I think we were like sixteen then. And Lily kind of slipped into this depressed state that scared me. I was shut out for months and I was so worried about her. There were times when I'd go to her house and sit by the door, having this one sided conversation and knowing that at least she heard me and knew I was there. And when you lost Robin, it reminded me off when you shut yourself away, even from Henry. This time though, I was worried, not that you'd become the Evil Queen again. But that you'd completely give up on trusting or loving anyone again."
Regina took measured breaths and tried to keep the tears at bay. "Well I haven't. His loss is painful but I can trust and love again. Apart from him, there has always been room for someone…else." She realized that her words had slipped out based on the effect the other woman had. And she instantly regretted it.
"You mean you're in love with someone else?" Emma's display of shock only provoked the brunette into believing that she needed to defend herself.
"That's not…what I meant," she couldn't help but find that her voice was unsteady. "I didn't mean that –"
"You're blushing," the blonde almost whispered, "geez, there's colour on your cheeks. Regina, what –"
"I am not blushing," the older woman said defensively, feeling her hands slightly tremble. "Your vision must be failing you, Miss Swan."
"And I've realized that every time we get into a sensitive area, you always refer to me as Miss Swan." Emma leaned her head lower to consider the other woman's face. "Come on, you don't have to lie to me. We've come so far. Back there in Neal's apartment, you told me things that you never told anyone else, not even my mother, right?"
Regina's refusal to respond only provided the younger woman with further clarity that the topic was indeed a touchy one.
"I know you, Regina," Emma said softly. "I know you just as well as you know me. And you can't lie to me. Remember my superpower?"
"Oh stop waving your heroic superpower qualities at me," the brunette sassed, but not in an angered tone. "Stop reminding me that you're the hero and I'm the villain."
"I'm going to ignore the fact that you actually believe I still label you as a villain and I'll continue. I'll say this." Emma's face displayed no kind of emotion other than being prepared to reveal only honesty. "Whatever this is about, I'm all ears."
Carefully prying open the lid to the plastic container, Regina forked up a mouthful of tomato and lettuce. Instead of replying, she chewed slowly whilst deliberately avoiding eye contact with the blonde who sat there staring at the other woman's face intently.
"Come on, you've got me thinking now that if you didn't love him completely, then there's someone else. And I'm running the entire list of Storybrooke inhabitants through my head and I'm kind of coming up with blanks. Oh my God," Emma gasped. "it's not my mother or father, is it?"
"No!" Regina sharply voiced her distaste. "And I would rather we stop talking about this because I am still wrecked by Robin's demise."
"I respect that." The blonde nodded. "But I'm your friend and you know, I kind of feel jealous when you lean to my mother most of the time and not me. Telling her everything whilst I'm struggling to be there for you and I can't completely. I mean, who do you trust more? Think about it based on experience. She or me?"
They stared at each other for a few seconds and that stare turned into a gaze. Slowly the brunette blinked at the other woman as the world slowed and her heart raced.
"There are things that I just cannot tell you," Regina confessed in a softer tone. "And you must allow me to make that choice."
"Most times when someone says that, it means that whatever you can't tell me, it's about me." Emma smiled back.
As much as her heart fluttered, the older woman breathed through her parted lips and appeared amused. "Then you've just answered your own question."
The blonde's smile remained for a few seconds more as she replayed her words. Then when something came to mind that absolutely stunned her, that smile disappeared. Obvious confusion swept into her head. And she watched the older woman eat her salad in silence whilst a debate stormed inside her head about the answers to several questions.
When they headed to the car, it was then when Emma couldn't help but to take a hold of Regina's right arm and she gently pulled her around. They faced each other.
"I don't get it," the blonde confessed. "You know how I hate riddles. Things that make my head hurt like crazy." Her wrinkled forehead displayed confusion. "What question did I answer exactly?"
Henry's arrival with Violet only allowed the brunette to slip into the front seat without replying.
"Out of everyone back home," Henry piped up as they headed out of New York, "my moms would do anything to save each other." Violet smiled at him and Emma studied his face in the rear-view mirror whilst Regina studied something on her phone. "Especially her. She's in so deep, she can't hide it for much longer."
"Hide what?" Emma asked from behind the wheel.
Regina sighed, trying to console Zelena on WhatsApp because of her lowered spirits on losing Hades. Those brown eyes focused on the road but she wasn't entirely in the car.
"It was never Robin, mom," Henry beamed at his mother in the mirror whilst Emma stared back. "It was always you."
Regina blinked as she heard Hood's name and immediately returned to the car mentally. "What are we talking about?"
Whilst Emma choked on the harshness of the truth coming to light, Henry giggled with Violet in the back.
And now she was walking.
She was taking tentative steps towards a destination that wasn't definite. Nowhere seemed like somewhere and the further she kept walking, her mind kept swirling back all those memories that never eroded with time. Slices in the past that only offered so much comfort or so much pain. Like in Neverland when her hands had brushed the branches apart to reveal Emma locking lips with Hook. To feel the kind of pain that wanted to kill her heart. To know that the future wasn't going to be promising anymore as much as the past and no matter how long she stood there, the brunette couldn't understand why she hadn't fallen in love with anyone but Emma Swan.
Perhaps it was the honesty in a young woman who had survived most of her life alone. Knowing that they were similar in many ways and that Emma could always be a rock she could lean on. The kind of person who always seemed to steer her into the right path. The kind of individual who never gave up but pushed forward with a passion when her belief was strong. When she believed in something or someone, that motivation to protect and love was endless.
They shared a son.
The Diner hadn't been her preferred location to stall at because of the time of night, being almost ten and to her understanding, Granny favoured an early Sunday night. But lo and behold, the lights were on and behind the counter, Ruby's red streaked hair could be seen as she sported a tight red blouse and a white apron.
But from the moment Regina approached the opened gateway and was about to proceed to the stone steps, a flurry of movement tore those brown eyes away from the door. At times, when she allowed it, changes in her surroundings were detected beforehand, almost like an additional sense. But that night, that heavy mind and heavy heart wasn't quite ready for alertness, as those black boots stopped immediately.
It would be a crime to suggest that the scene presented itself as a promising one. When the injustice arose from the sight of blonde tendrils curling upon black leather and their forgotten drinks sweated onto the table; the silence of the night rung in the brunette's ears. Because she wasn't prepared to accept what was obviously a building romance just yet. The heart never acknowledges the harsh truth until perhaps wedding bells are being rung and even then, Regina believed that her hopes would never be dulled. That she would still stand a chance until one of them drew their last breath.
However, it was unlikely that Emma would ever be the one to detach herself from the charming pirate to sway in the other direction where a most wide eyed older woman sought comfort and love.
Instead, Regina stood there growing dizzy on the spot as the wind swayed her slightly and those brown eyes glistened with tears. Blinking slowly, she wished more than anything in the world that the vision before her was a hallucination of some kind. That very soon, the harsh wind coming in from an overcast sky would dissolve the heartbreaking scene and replace it with just a lonesome young woman. With just the owner of emerald eyes who would gaze upon her approaching figure with earnest eyes. As if seeking out companionship.
The way his fingers raked pathways through blonde tendrils that she longed to kiss and touch made Regina tremble inside. For when Robin had been intimate with her, there was always a feeling of being slightly uncomfortable as she longed to have someone else in her arms. Those nights when he would curl up next to her, the smell of vanilla would be faint but enough to shake her into a dream. Where she lay under the stars next to the one woman who owned her heart and they remained there until the world ended.
"Shit. Fuck." Emma seemed to suddenly notice the brunette's form by the gate and she almost tumbled off of Hook's lap. Appearing flustered, her movements were fast and clumsy as she unfolded herself and stared at the other woman.
Hook on the other hand noted Regina's arrival and displayed a somewhat definite scowl.
"You're out late," the blonde tried, slowly approaching the older woman with a stiff smile. "Suddenly got a craving for Granny's cheesecake?"
"I don't eat cheesecake," Regina's tone was bitter and she completely avoided eye contact. Instead the door to the Diner was stared at. "I see that you're having fun."
"Yeah, well…" Emma tilted her head and shrugged. "Killian and I were just…talking."
It was then when the brunette stared at the other woman and raised an eyebrow. "Inaudibly."
"He has this way that kind of annoys me," the blonde explained, "I mean just when I'm trying to talk to him, he kind of starts going a mile more. And I…" she frowned when the older woman stepped around her and moved to the door. Emma followed her. "I kind of wanted to say a few things but…"
"Forgive me but I'm not in the mood to talk about your steamy romance, Miss Swan." Regina pushed the door open, holding her breath as tears still clouded those eyes.
"There you go again calling me Miss Swan." Emma frowned. "But I understand why."
"You do?" Brown eyes latched onto emerald ones. And when Swan finally noted how wet those brown ones were, she blinked slowly. "You'll never understand anything about me. For as long as we reside in the same town together, I really don't believe that we will ever walk the same path –"
"Regina," the blonde's voice was hoarser. "It's not what you think."
"It's not what I think?" Regina tried to appear amused but her eyes deceived her.
"I know enough."
The wind whipped blonde hair about a very pretty face and the brunette felt her heart skip many beats. "What do you know exactly, Miss Swan? Go ahead and astound me with conversation."
Emma stared back. She took a hold of the rail and looked at it for a few seconds. "I know that you're in love with me." Her voice had gone softer, almost covered by the wind.
Regina felt her heart quiver as those brown eyes widened and no matter how hard efforts were made to breathe, the task seemed so difficult to accomplish.
"I'm trying to work things out slowly. I'm trying to find a common ground here where I can make a decision." Their eyes met and it was Swan who offered a lopsided smile.
"What…decision?" The brunette felt her head grow dizzy.
"I'll meet you inside in a few minutes," Emma offered, glancing at Killian. "Then we can talk."
Talk? Talk about what exactly? What had those string of words meant? Could it be possible that the inevitable could swing into the other lane and actually happen? Or perhaps she was paranoid. That's it.
With the shake of her head, Regina said, "yes."
And then the door was pushed open. But weakly. Because her knees had almost turned into jelly if it hadn't been for a small flame of hope burning within that fluttering chest.
She waited inside the depths of the Diner for what seemed like an eternity. Coffee was turned down because of the fear that sleep would not come if such habit was allowed. Instead, she opted for a cup of cocoa that only reminded her of the woman outside. The slice of chocolate cake was nibbled at. The taste of it reminded her of the apple shaped cake Emma had presented her with in February. Even the red shirt with black floral print the brunette had on was given to her by the younger woman as a Christmas gift.
That was what love did to her. Reminding that beating heart around every corner of the one person she adored more than anything else in the world. Because even Henry had been stolen away by his new love interest. Even he had begun to hardly show himself. Which left the older woman to become absorbed in memories and feelings that only grew stronger and stronger.
"Did you tell her as yet?" Ruby's beaming face appeared on the other end of the table. "You know…about how you feel…"
Regina didn't show any sign of being irritated because ever so recently, it was the other brunette who had lent a shoulder and an ear. Of course she understood everything in that department and since her relationship with Dorothy had led into Storybrooke, the only person who appeared to be of any assistance and support was Lucas.
"I haven't," the older woman said, hands folded upon the table as she gazed at them.
Ruby lowered her head and sighed. "Damn."
"But she knows."
"What?" The taller brunette stared back with wide eyes. "How's that even…"
"I believe that she has finally deciphered the conversation we had in New York and the answer screamed in bold colour that my affections are slanted in her direction." The chocolate cake was picked at with numb fingers. "Could it be even possible that I am entirely mad?" Ruby's face was stared at. "Could it be that Gold has done something to me to foolishly have me fall for…her?"
"Well, I wouldn't put it past him to do something like that," Lucas agreed. "But there are certain things about you that screams the truth. I mean, fuck, you've recovered pretty fast after Hood's death. That's one. And then I think the first time I noticed something different about you was a couple months ago before we all slid into the underworld. When you were sitting right over there," Ruby gestured to the front table, "with Snow, David and Emma. And you were just gazing at her with so much colour in your cheeks."
"Just…stop," Regina blinked at the table and inhaled deeply, her fingers curling upon it.
"Why?" Ruby smiled. "Because I'm reminding you of how much you totally wanted to kiss her?"
The older woman stopped breathing and stared at her companion. Immediately those cheeks were flushed.
But Lucas was really enjoying the reaction she sparked up. "I've been there more than once."
"And I suppose that Dorothy is your shiny gold medal that you hang on your wall to display success," the older brunette sassed but her voice cracked. "Not all of us are as lucky. I am prepared for only heartbreak."
"Don't fall out just yet," Lucas informed her reassuringly. "I mean I've seen the shit you've been through and it wouldn't surprise me if Emma just sidesteps and friendzones you. But learn from your new bestie, and have a little hope like Snow. You might be surprised where that leads you."
"I…had…hope," Regina said in a pained tone. "I had that with Robin and look what happened."
"Darling you didn't love him as much as you love Emma," Ruby reminded her, reaching across the table to squeeze the older woman's fingers. "Yeah you had hope. Hope that he would replace her. But he couldn't."
"It doesn't meant that I didn't love him," Regina said defensively.
"I know that," Lucas said sweetly. "I know you loved him. But I'm just saying that fate works in the most mysterious way. Like it would literally move around the pieces on the board to give you what you want, once you have the world of hope. You've come this far. You know what it's like to hold back. You know what it's like to lose someone you love. But it doesn't mean that you shouldn't give yourself another chance."
"As if she will ever do that," Regina huffed out a sigh and looked up as the bell tinkled over the door.
Ruby swiveled her head to acknowledge Emma's entrance and she quickly turned back to her new friend. "Incoming!" she whispered. "But listen to me, okay? Don't let anything drag you down. If she doesn't feel the same way about you, honey you deserve better."
Regina's brown eyes blinked slowly as she thanked the taller brunette. Watching her unfold herself and approach the blonde as they exchanged a few words. Noting that Emma was still capable of smiling after that declaration outside on knowing the truth was somewhat nerve-wrecking to the older woman. Perhaps she had her own plans as always. And this would turn out quite satisfactory after all. But the way she was hugging Hook outside? Of course she still had feelings for him.
"I kind of thought that you'd use the back door and run away," Swan said as she slid into the seat where Lucas had occupied. Their legs bumped under the table and the brunette's chest heaved as she tried hard to appear calm. "I'm glad that you didn't though. Regina, I've been trying to get onto you for like a week now since we got back from New York." The blonde seemed breathless. "Where the hell where you?"
"I was…" the older woman paused, never making eye contact but prying star sprinkles from her chocolate cake, "…indisposed."
If she could have seen the look of worry on the blonde's face, her hopes would have been restored in Emma actually caring.
"Don't tell me it's the flu. I heard that it's going around here –"
"It's not the flu," Regina interrupted, her eyes stinging. Ruby was wiping the counter slowly, all eyes on the two women seated a few feet away. "I've been told that when something doesn't seem promising, one needs to distance themselves from the source."
"And…that's what you've been doing," Emma stated in a lowered voice. "Deliberately staying away from me."
"Yes."
"It's like taking a hundred steps forward and then a thousand steps backward with you," Emma huffed out a sigh and warily signalled to Ruby. "How's the chocolate cake? Any good?"
Regina studied the blonde's dull demeanour whilst the taller brunette approached the table. "Spare me the dramatics, Miss Swan. And explain to me, why I am seated here with you."
Emma purposely refused to continue the conversation until Ruby had delivered the cake and was safely behind the counter. Then after taking the chunk of chocolate between her fingers, refusing to use the white plastic fork, the younger woman bit into it. Of course, Regina's expression displayed utter distaste in such habits until her fluttering heart settled all doubts in the other woman's character. And what replaced that doubt was a growing sensation of love and admiration for Swan's boldness.
"Okay, so I don't know how to put this lightly. But..." with her mouth full, Emma shrugged, studying the cake, "...I've never been with a woman before. I mean, I've had a crush on my History teacher. And that was it."
"I've never been with a woman either," Regina's voice came out rustier than expected. Her throat ached when emerald eyes lingered in that direction. "You're the first woman I've ever been stupid enough to fall for."
"Don't blame you," Swan said with a bland expression as she chewed slowly and their eyes connected. "I can't help it if I'm hot as hell."
"And you eat like a child," the brunette smiled. "Here," she pinched up a square of tissue and offered it across the table. When their fingers brushed, it was a lingering touch that remained for a few seconds.
"I'm pretty scared to admit how I feel about all of this. Because I don't want any bad blood between us. So I'll use a scenario instead. From the first time Emily met Robert, they never really got along smoothly."
Regina frowned. "Why do I have to be a man by the name of Robert?"
"Just play along," Emma pleaded with her green eyes. "Unless you want me to use tacos and a muffin." The raised eyebrow expression she received from the brunette made the younger woman smile. "Okay, so pretty much, as the years progressed, Emily was more focused on her son and working on herself. Because she's never been settled for too long."
"Can we skip to the part where you actually focus on where Emily and Robert are as of now?" Regina tapped her fingers upon the table impatiently.
"So Emily has never seen Robert as a potential. Like...ever...before," Emma continued without heeding to the brunette's pleas. "She doesn't really want to love anyone so she doesn't consider anyone really."
"Oh and I suppose Neal and Guyliner were unfortunate obstacles that jolted you awake at different points?" Regina stared back. "Skip to the part where I get to throw a fireball at you to get your senses up and running again."
"Look, they were the ones who came after me. Not the other way around," Emma stated, her cake bitten into and sitting on the plate. "I wasn't looking for love."
"Why am I here, Swan?" Regina's chest heaved as her fingers curled into a fist. Little wisps of anger streaked her mind.
"I don't know what I want," the blonde confessed in a softer tone, staring at the other woman. "I'm being serious with you right now. Emily looks at Robert and sees so many good qualities instead of bad ones. And most days, she can't help but run after him to make sure he's okay. Which means something..." Emma shrugged and offered a small smile.
"I'm not in love with Killian. He makes a future look promising. But so can anyone else. All I'm saying is, once someone could awaken that part inside of me that I had with Neal, then it's going to be amazing. I'm going to do it. And to know that you have these...feelings for me, I'm here to tell you that I'm not going to push you away because of them. Instead, I just need a little more convincing."
"Haven't I convinced you enough by following you to the underworld to at least help you save Hook? I wanted to see you happy regardless of how I felt. I have never liked him. I detest him every second of every day because he has been your...choice." Regina's eyes glistened with tears. "And I have tried so hard to move past this with Robin but I can't. Now that he's gone, it is harder for me."
Emma swallowed hard and her eyes flicked to the cake sitting on the plate. Hurt, at least she felt in that period of time that silence lingered on. Hurt and feeling as if she was a disappointment. Feeling as if she had been purposely hurting the other woman when it wasn't her intention at all. It was never her will to cause pain to someone like Regina. When they could argue and stop talking for a while, they always managed to come together again. Regardless of the situation.
"I don't want to tell you that I don't feel something for you," Emma said instead, finding it hard to breathe. "Because it's not the truth. I do feel something. I just don't know what it is. And I'd rather leave this open between us to see where it leads because I don't want to lose you again."
Regina blinked from across the table and felt her throat tighten.
"Every time I lost your trust, I just couldn't live with that."
"Then what do you suggest?" Regina's throaty voice would always curl the other woman's toes in her boots.
Emma shrugged. "Is it too much to ask you to..." her cheeks flushed a little as their eyes met, "...flirt with me? Tell me stuff that would make me smile? Walk with me? Talk to me more? Show me that you actually love me and my messy hair and my kid habits?"
Why hadn't she considered that before? Instead of taking the path that led them to awkwardness and tension. Regina could have stepped up regardless of Hook's involvement and prove to the other woman that she could be suitable enough. Instead, their trip to New York and Hades showdown had slowed any kind of plan the brunette had hatched. Now when those same things were asked of her, she felt slightly inadequate in regards to never displaying any kind of feelings to advertise her genuine interest.
"Sometimes you're really nice," Emma chewed on her chocolate cake and sat back, legs spread apart. "Like when we share a snack or we talk about Henry. But apart from that, I've never really seen more of your vulnerable side. Like the side you showed me in New York in Neal's apartment. I've got to admit, it scared me to see you so...I don't know...mushy. Because you've always been this rock and as much as I'd want a strong person to share my life with, I also want to see them peel back every layer to show me what they're really like inside."
It shouldn't have been too much to ask for.
But to Regina, it was just that. After so many years of building her walls up, and maintaining her stamina to achieve goals no other woman could, love had never been able to soften her. Of course Robin had succeeded somewhat. But he had done the flirting and all the soft gestures. Now the tables had turned and she was expected to be romantic.
"So even with Hook in the picture," Regina's eyes were slightly wet, "you're still considering me?"
Emma tilted her head and smiled warmly. "Which sensible woman would consider a pirate any day over a Queen?"
The brunette's cheeks flushed. She smiled down at her curled up fingers and inhaled deeply. "Is that what puts me in the lead? My title?"
"No. Other things too. I've known you longer than him. We share a kid. Like you always prove to me; we're stronger together because of our magic. You're gorgeous..." With their eyes connected, Regina couldn't help but display her genuine admiration for those words. "Plus I'd love to see my parents' reaction if I kiss you in front of them..."
"And do you...want to...kiss me?" The brunette's husky voice hinted a swirling of emotions within.
Emma held her breath as she considered that statement.
"Because every night, that is all my dream is composed of," Regina continued. "Wherever I am. It doesn't matter. The amount of times I have been so close to kissing you, Emma, you have no idea."
"Really?" It was the blonde's turn to have her voice take on a huskier quality. "Tell me when you wanted to."
"Firstly when we were at the town line and I gave you those memories to share with Henry," the older woman confessed. "Believing that I'd never see you again..."
Emma's chest heaved as those emerald eyes blinked slowly.
"And every time after when we were alone. Especially during that night when I was on my first stakeout with you in front of my office. And you shared your coffee with me. And you told me about your best moments at school and your worst moments in the foster system." Regina collected a red heart shaped sprinkle from her cupcake and gazed at it.
"It felt so natural to tell you all those things..."
"I want you to tell me everything about you," Regina croaked, "every single thing."
"Even when I was in prison?" The blonde couldn't breathe, feeling her chest tighten from the older woman's captivating words and gaze.
"I used to frown upon your time spent in there," the brunette admitted, "but now I just wish that circumstances were different and we had met sooner. And every bad thing that ever happened to you, could be erased."
"But then I wouldn't be the rock I am today," Emma told her. "You know...that part of me that you find attractive."
Could it be possible to have an easy flow of words that suggested such a comfortable bond between them, no tension lingered? No kind of harshness tore at their connection. At some point in time, they had pushed aside all the electrical lines arising from anger and mistrust and had arrived there. A comfortable place where brown eyes met emerald ones and a gaze was held. Where the blonde actually wished for the older woman to flirt with her. Such things showed trust.
They walked home together.
Emma walked her to Mifflin Street and all the way there, under the night sky, they spoke to each other like something was newly found between the two of them. In fact, if it hadn't been for the blonde's curiosity along the way, sparking up question after question, a certain amount of calmness wouldn't have settled on the brunette's countenance to provide room to flirt.
"So Henry boldly told mom that no, he doesn't want any more lemon cakes and that she should tone down on the lemonade as well." Emma kept glancing at the older woman with hands tucked into the front pockets of her jeans as they walked. "I mean, the kid basically had enough."
"Is he...still a kid?" Regina's lowered head didn't hide her flushed cheeks and a small smile. She shrugged. "In such a short time, between Camelot to now, he has grown up so much. Sometimes I feel as if..."
"He doesn't want us around as much anymore," Emma continued. Their eyes met. A gaze was held as the night air lifted blonde tendrils and darker ones. "I pretty much get that feeling. Don't you?"
"I do. Like today when I texted him to ask him if he wants to join me for lunch. He declined politely and told me that he was going for a midday ride with Violet."
"Does it make you feel as if you're not that important anymore?" Emma wondered out loud as they moved past the library. "To him, I mean."
"We all have our own lives to live, don't we?" The brunette buried her hands into the black coat's pockets and walked on. "At some point, I knew that he was going to find someone else to shower all his love onto. And it has happened."
"Maybe this means that you can now shower all your love on someone else..." The blonde nudged the other woman's left shoulder playfully.
"I'm still not used to this sudden spark inside of you that suggests me as a potential."
"Come on, what's not to love?"
"I don't want to be an option, Emma," Regina turned her head to have their eyes meet. "I don't want to be the person you take a taste of and then when you find that I am quite old fashioned and sophisticated, you run into his arms again."
"I mean, what if I want a woman instead of a guy?" Lifting her eyes to the night sky, the blonde inhaled deeply and tried to refresh herself. "What if all this time, I've wanted you instead of anyone else?"
"Who's doing the flirting now?" The brunette smiled.
"No. But..." Emma leaned in and her cheeks coloured, "...I've been thinking about this all wrong for a long time. Maybe this was never about me working and trying so hard to save you and be your friend. Maybe this was...about me realizing something so much bigger."
Regina waited on the continuation of that sentence and when nothing else was said, she swallowed and those red painted lips were bitten.
"The night is quite chilly," she found herself saying, feeling how the muscles in her face tightened from the wave of paranoia that swept in and blared nothing relating to love in air. "Maybe we'll have a shower later."
"I love when it rains at night," Emma confessed. "I pretty much drift off into sleep faster."
"I haven't slept more than five hours in over a year," Regina croaked, considering her boots as she walked slowly.
"Robin probably had you up most of the night, huh?" She meant it as a slip of amusement into the conversation, attaching a smile.
"Actually no," the brunette said, suddenly sounding as if she had caught a cold. One sniff led to a lifted gloved hand that carefully wiped the corners of her eyes. "But you know what? It doesn't...matter. None of this matters. Truth be told, I suck at flirting and he has all the charm. So let us just call it a night. And I'll maybe be over you by Christmas."
'Regina," Emma stopped walking and the older woman took a few steps forward, never daring to look back.
"Have a great night, Miss...Swan," she kept on walking. "See you around."
"Maybe I'm suddenly so happy, not because he's back," she said more to herself than to the brunette as she created more distance between them. "But because I finally found out that...you're in love with me."
On better days, the rain would have soothed her mind. But that night as the heavens opened up and poured sheets of water onto her roof on Mifflin Street, Regina's nerves heightened. Pacing didn't help. Neither did reading. And when all things that should have calmed her down, even chewing on an apple didn't soothe the pangs of love, the brunette tumbled onto a leather chair. Dark hair tumbling forward, she decided to curl up into a ball, formally dressed in a red long sleeved shirt with two buttons undone and a pair of black tailored pants.
The fire crackled behind the glass panel. The embers never died down due to magic and somewhere outside those walls as a quiet afternoon faded into a dark and even calmer night, frogs began to croak in rhythmic melodies.
At six o'clock, there were three knocks on the front door. Immediately yanking her mind out of a slumber, the older woman's tousled hair gave her the appearance of someone who was severely unprepared for a casual date. But was it even a date? She had just asked the blonde to step in for a drink. Emma had agreed, sounding as cheerful as ever and all through the day, the brunette couldn't sit down for more than ten minutes.
Upon opening the door, as soon as their eyes met, the water droplets clinging to blonde tendrils quickly worried the other woman. Hopping on the spot, Emma shook off the remaining rain from that familiar red leather jacket and smiled. Well someone was in an entirely heightened mood since their return from New York. Or was it the miraculous incident that pulled Hook back into the living world?
That thought alone sank Regina's heart as she ushered in Emma and the immediate warmth of the fireplace drifted through the room. Cold fingers whenever anxiety seeped through that wall of hers. Trembling fingers and a shaky disposition that suggested unsteadiness when love was in the air. A certain amount of composure would often be hoped for. But knowing herself, and what kind of force was at play between the younger woman and a former Evil Queen, the owner of that fantastically new black, three piece leather sofa set didn't know what to expect.
"You've done something different with this place," Emma frown deepened as she stalled at the hearth behind the glass. "I mean, I can just feel it. Like it's not the same as before."
"Observe carefully," Regina urged as she smiled from the corner table where a bottle of Bourbon was displayed alongside two glasses. "There is something different."
"That...statue," Swan pointed at a stone carving of an apple, furrowing her brows. "That's new."
The brunette chuckled and moved to stand beside the younger woman, offering her the glass of twinkling liquid. "I've always had that particular item on my mantelpiece, Emma. Have a swallow of Bourbon. Perhaps your senses will become alight afterwards."
Adhering to the other woman's biddings, the blonde took a hearty mouthful and was immediately overwhelmed with the warming sensation. A flowing feeling that travelled down her throat and did so smoothly. Killian adored his rum. That form of alcohol left a bitter taste. But for some odd reason, Regina's choice of poison felt soothing to a point where emerald eyes fluttered close. Momentarily, of course, and then when her senses indeed lit up, she spun around to confront the room at large.
"The chairs!" her eyes widened. "You brought in a new set. I mean, I could smell the leather but..." Emma strode towards the double cushioned black furniture and brown eyes gazed as those fair fingers touched the leather almost too intimately. Running her fingertips over the material as if she was caressing a lover's soft skin.
Just for a moment, Regina's breath was held and she envisioned what it would feel like to be touched like that. To be handled with such kindness in a gentle fashion. To be held close as her lips tasted the softness of the blonde's fair neck and so much more. Patience. She struggled to regain focus on the room and her fingers trembled as she took a small sip of Bourbon.
"You're a work of art, you know that?" Emma's eyes rested on the older woman once again, a small smile playing on those lips.
Regina glanced away and inhaled deeply. "How so?"
"The way you live. Your style. Your..." The blonde seemed flushed all of a sudden, as if she was captivated by an idea that provided generous results. "Everything about you is just so in order."
"Except my love life," the brunette highlighted.
"Never give up hope," Emma said whilst admiring the tumble of dark hair. "Didn't you learn anything at all from my parents?"
"Yes but whilst they preach about hope, here I am, having lost two tickets to love and still living with a caged heart."
"There's a third ticket," the blonde said softly.
Their eyes met and brown ones studied how such a beautiful face was affected by a smile. "I'm not certain I like this path you're suggesting, Emma." Regina felt her heart ache and considered it to be a sign of all hopes falling apart. "Had I been the only player..."
"Which Queen doesn't like a competition?" The blonde seemed genuinely at ease with the whole ordeal.
"So here there is another love triangle as the one shared with Neal before," the older woman highlighted, "and I am the stifling third angle."
"Don't say that," Emma tilted her head.
"With many advantageous moves already taken on his part," Regina led her thoughts down a hopeless path, "he has succeeded around every corner. Only to have been risen from the dead like some martyr whilst I am left to wonder about the purpose of his return."
"Stop -"
"Could this be my signal?" Their eyes met and brown ones glistened from tears. "That I must step aside and give room to the alley cat who has not one, but two lives now? Because I'm certain that he's possibly never going to give up on you as his heart honestly believes that the angels gave him a second chance to be with his beautiful Saviour."
Somehow, the blonde smiled as her cheeks slightly coloured. "You think that I'm beautiful." One step was taken to shorten the distance between them and Emma observed how the older woman's countenance immediately wavered. "Wow. I would have never imagined that I'd hear you say something like that about me."
She couldn't breathe. Even as her fingers trembled whilst clutching the glass of Bourbon that had grown warmer from the hearth, Regina stood there and felt her knees weaken.
"I was just stating the obvious," came her reply in a hoarser tone. And turning around but barely, her footsteps led to the table. When the bottle, her choice of poison was taken up, mentally it didn't even register that a not so empty glass didn't need a refill.
"You're shaking," Emma's voice came from behind. "Don't."
"I'm..." she found herself shrugging as the bottle was rested onto the table once more, with a slim feeling of being quite idiotic in retrieving it in the first place. "I'm not shaking."
"You are," the younger woman slowly closed the distance and studied how Regina's shoulders curled forward. Almost as if she was crumbling inside. "Are you afraid of me?"
"No," the brunette's voice grew huskier. She cleared her throat still envisioned the other woman standing at a considerable distance. "I'm afraid of what you'll do to me and the power you have over me now. It's funny really." She half laughed as the glass was clutched to her chest. Those brown eyes were lifted to meet the painting of a dark night set alongside a rocky coastline. "Am I ever going to love someone who loves me far more than I love them?"
"I would do anything to protect you. Just as I did that night when I took the darkness upon myself." Emma's voice alerted the older woman that she was nearer, so near that the actuality of their proximity was entirely overwhelming. "Isn't that, I don't know...enough proof that I value your life over mine?"
When she uttered those words...When she proclaimed the depth of her feelings for the brunette in that moment, it was like the lock on the cage that contained her heart just snapped open. It was like a window had been thrown open and new light came in to replace the sickly dark interior. Because wherever there was light, the darkness waited. Shadows danced upon her walls many times, like demons at play that promised nothing but a painful life spent alone. Until she had accepted that her heavy heart could actually love a woman like Emma.
"And since I would do anything to keep you here, it reminds me of how my life would be empty without someone like you. I need you," Emma said in a soft tone. "More than I even realize. He doesn't make me feel comfortable as you do. I don't even know him as good as I know you. I know you're probably thinking that I don't know what the hell I want right now. That I'm just standing here telling you a bunch of stuff that doesn't even answer all the questions you have. But even I can't answer my own questions. Like what do I want with my life? I know that I want permanence and to feel...something. I know that I want to be happy. But when it comes to love...I don't know what I want."
Slowly, the brunette rested her glass upon the table and as much as she tried, breathing was a hard task.
"Just say something to me," Emma said, frowning at the tumble of dark hair. "Anything."
There it was; the purposeful need to close up. "Maybe this was a terrible idea." Tears clouded those brown eyes. "Maybe you should just leave."
"What?" Her heart immediately was sliced with pain, signaling that something was indeed felt from the connection they had. Something was destroying her with every inch of distance and every ill word spoken. The blonde stared as the older woman brushed past her and headed into the depths of the mansion that was dimly lit.
"See your way out," Regina's throaty voice travelled through the air. There was the sound of a door opening and then the closing of it stung Emma's eyes.
For the first time in a long time, she felt what it was truly like to have something snap in her heart. To feel the purest slice of pain. To stand there amidst all those refined touches that were aided by the older woman's mind and to fall into a web of confusion. Knots that tightened. Knowing that the moment she stepped into that mansion just less than an hour ago, that open heart was set on a unpredictable course.
Try as she might, her mind was struggling to lead those brown leather boots to the door. To see her way out quietly. But she couldn't exit quietly. Not when her head raced with so many thoughts arising from paranoia and those emerald eyes burned. Tears were held back. Tears signalled that she was crumbling too on the inside. So mustering up all the composure she could draw from, the blonde clenched her fists and strode into the depths of the house where the older woman's footsteps had led.
It was like feeding off of a signal they both latched onto and never could disconnect. She knew where the brunette was without searching. So that when the door to the dark themed study was pushed open, the older woman's form by the window didn't startle her. No. In fact, her heart leapt forward. Her footsteps crossed the threshold and moved further into the room.
"I told you to leave," Regina sounded wounded, as she hugged herself. Their eyes hadn't met as yet but the blonde was certain of the presence of tears.
"And I want to stay."
"Go back to your wide eyed pirate," the older woman said with her voice unsteady. "After all, he's more promising than me."
"Why can't you just look me in my eyes and tell me that you want me and you'd fight for me?" Emma felt tears fill her eyes. "Don't you think that that's all I want to hear? That I've been waiting to hear that from someone for a long time? I just want you to make me feel as if I'm somebody."
When nothing was said, she tasted how salty her tears were and felt even lonelier.
"After all we've been through, Regina, you just can't come right out and admit that I've always been on your side for a reason. Not only because I saw a friend in you. But I saw something else. And from the first day we met, we never had something easy between us. It was always there. Yet all this time, you probably blame me for being romantically inclined to Neal and Killian whilst you never..." she took a deep breath and her voice cracked. Lips bitten, Emma swallowed.
"You never made this easy."
"I am not an easy person," Regina spun around to display tear stained cheeks. "I have pushed past my limit and I am beyond flawed. This is the real me. Even Robin couldn't get close to me because I could never confess how I truly feel. I am not good at expressing how I feel. I expressed my anger for your mother through destroying other people's happy endings instead of using words. Because when it comes to my heart, I am not a warrior. I am not even a Queen. I am just a frightened woman who has lost so much, she's afraid to speak the truth."
"I get that," Emma nodded and blinked away tears. "Okay, I totally get that you're complicated. And you're scared. And you're probably wishing that you didn't love me right now. But all I'm asking for is for you to take me to a place where I feel like I don't want to run anymore."
"You're not running from him."
The blonde shook her head. "Then why am I here with you?"
They gazed at each other for what seemed like an hour and more. Within that time, the older woman's heart raced. Her hands grew sweaty and between them composed of a million reasons to stay instead of to leave.
"How can you ask me to leave when I came here hoping that you'd ask me to stay? I want to say goodbye to him. But I need somewhere to crash. In the underworld, he made me realize what I wanted in life. When he died, I woke up. At first I thought that I should just stay away from love. But then I realized that I needed to be with someone who knew what it was like to hate me. Someone who grew to love me. Someone who knows all my flaws and finally accepted me. I don't think that I can ever surprise someone like you. Because you can read me like the back of your hand. And it's the same for me. I think that when you cast that curse on my birthday many years ago, somehow you connected us in a way that we can never escape from."
"It was always you," Regina stared at the blonde with parted lips.
"From the beginning and all the way down to now. You've always been out to get me. And in your own words I'll remind you, 'ain't fate a bitch?'"
After restructuring her mind and allowing a beating heart to race freely, the brunette took tentative steps towards the younger woman. She couldn't breathe. She couldn't think about anything else but what lingered between them. So that when the distance was closed, by reflex her fingers moved to clip blonde tendrils that resided upon red leather whilst their eyes remained connected.
She felt the softness and slowly prolonged the gesture by caressing a fair cheek with cupped fingers. What happened between them was never to be questioned. When Emma trembled from the warm touch, she wasn't afraid to display how weak her mind had become. And when her mind became weak, only one thing was most definitely occurring; the pangs of love.
"Will you ever allow me to kiss you?" Regina's voice was barely a whisper when she gazed into those emerald orbs. "To hold you? To show you that I am far better than him?" She didn't even realize that her fingers were taken between warmer ones, captured and entwined as their touch lingered near the blonde's jawline.
"Kiss me," Emma said, their lips inches apart and dancing nearer. "Hug me all you want. Because you're far better than he ever was and will ever be."
"Really?" The brunette's small smile as tears slid down her honey coloured cheeks embraced the younger woman's heart.
Swan was the one bold enough to move in and brush their lips together, noting how the older woman trembled. But not from being afraid. It was because of how the depth of her love quaked and enveloped a broken soul. It was definite. The way Regina instantly curled into Emma's embrace as her hands took a hold of shoulders that curled forward. Her hands took in the feel of red leather and she crushed her lips upon already parted ones as their bodies drew closer.
Her kiss was deeper and softer and grew hungrier as Regina's head spun dangerously. The intoxication was greater than the expectation. Of knowing only what it would look like for many months but never quite bracing herself for the actuality. For the feel of Emma's heart racing against hers. It was not like poison. It was complete bliss. And as she savoured the kiss that unearthed throaty moans from them both, the younger woman felt purposeful.
Regina felt herself being walked backwards and allowed it. She liked the initial dominance but never prolonged it. Hot hell though; Swan had a way with her kiss. So deep and so captivating, the brunette fought to gather some kind of control over the entire moment. But she failed. She failed because their tongues met and fingers raked pathways through her dark hair and she only wanted to give in to being controlled like a pawn piece instead of manipulating.
Every once and a while, a Queen longed to be taken control of.
"Look at me," Regina took a hold of the blonde's chin and demanded attention. She cupped between the other woman's legs and admired how emerald eyes widened, lips parting to allow a gasp to escape. Wandering into a zone that promised so much intensity.
She was pushed not harshly but with just enough pressure to sit upon the edge of her expansive brown oak desk. And when Emma moved in closer between parted legs, the brunette stared up at her.
"I'm so going to enjoy this," Emma made an audible announcement with a smile.
"Not if I show you how it's done first," Regina's smirk was definite in the dimly lit interior of her study. And with a swift move, she curled a hand around the blonde's waist and they exchanged positions.
It was miraculous how fast Emma was positioned upon the desk's surface with the older woman climbing on top. With such agility, the younger woman was stunned but amused at the same time whilst she laughed and splayed her arms on either side. It was like giving up all your rights to fighting just because a fucking gorgeous woman wanted her way with you. And not any woman. But of all the women on the earth, the most gorgeous one had to be pulling off her jacket and unbuttoning her shirt. And it was Regina Mills.
To confess that her heaving chest was exposed and ravished until she couldn't breathe would be a fair enough one. A line of events that forced out moans that had to be bitten and held back. Her body was squirming as she was sandwiched between the desk and a woman who was on a mission. So that when her hands were batted away as they tried to take a hold of the other woman's breasts, the growl escaping from the blonde was an aggressive one.
"I need to get a chance," Emma directed at the towering brunette. "Let me see some lace."
As soon as she attempted to part the other woman's shirt, two fingers neatly slid into her and the vacant stare at the ceiling was enough to display complete release of one's power. Taking her mind to a place where she felt like everything was opening up like a flower and all visual was completely cut off. Even with her knees bent and the heels of those brown boots clipping the edge of the desk, Emma couldn't find herself when Regina initiated the blissful art of lovemaking.
Thrusting in and out slowly as she gyrated her hips upon the blonde, the older woman stimulated between her parted legs as well. Both of them losing themselves eventually as Emma held onto the brunette's hips and tossed her mane of hair backwards. Gasping for air. Squeezing her kinked legs to sandwich the brunette between and on top of her as her body neared the edge. Trembling when she felt her body convulse and staring in awe when Regina joined her too. Both of them shaking as they held onto each other with the older woman's fingers buried deep inside of her. And their new-found bond pierced their mind, body and soul.
For a lengthy time they rode the waves of pleasure together, finding that the way their bodies reacted was incredulous. In fact, from the moment Emma realized that she hadn't even touched Regina to awaken such pulsating orgasms, her mind ignited with amazement. Her body ached to be touched like that forever and somehow, it didn't feel like the end of a first attempt. But the beginning.
But she had grown so weak from the intensity of climax that her mind was still struggling to reawaken paralysed senses.
When Regina chose to retreat into the blonde's arms as they lay upon the desk, nothing else in the world mattered but their hearts beating as one. Nothing. Not even the future. Not the past. Just the present where they resided in each other's embrace and Emma held the older woman close as she stroked her slightly damp hair.
In more ways than one they were so alike. Buried deep within, their souls understood the familiarity and curled up together. Their souls had been longing to escape and to entwine she needed was a push. All she needed was a reason to take the next step; to feel, to know, to love, to taste. And most of all, to fall in love with someone who understood her like the back of her hand.
"Henry was right," Emma said in a breathless manner. "He was right when he said that you invited me in for drinks when we met because you were immediately overwhelmed by my gorgeousness. Like I totally get it. I get that you can't resist this. And truth be told; after you rode me like a horse, I can't resist you either. Round two?"
There was no response.
Peering down, she was able to capture the cutest scene ever.
Regina was curled up onto her, dark hair fanned out and her bunched fists rested on the blonde's heaving chest.
"Come on," Emma sighed. "I thought it was a fact that only men slept after sex."
"If you wish to ride me then go right ahead. No complaints," Regina's husky voice alerted the blonde.
Suddenly, Emma stifled a yawn behind a curled up fist. "Hmm. Maybe later."
"Return the favour, Swan," Regina's eyes flashed but there was a definite smirk on her face.
"Like give me half an hour to charge up first. Then after I raid your kitchen, I might be up to it." Those emerald eyes fluttered close.
"You pathetic waste of space," the brunette lifted her lips to the younger woman's face and softly nibbled the shell of her ear. "Why raid my kitchen when you can raid me?"
"Because I've been eyeing that bowl of potato salad for days now in your fridge and I'm going to eat the entire thing out."
"Hmm," Regina settled her head upon the other woman's breasts with a guilty smile. "You're in for a disappointment."
"Wait..." Emma lifted her torso up and stared. "What? Where's the potato salad?"
"It was for your mother. So you either devour me or go hungry." The brunette yanked the younger woman back onto the desk and hugged her close.
"No, wait one damn minute." Emma tried to untangle herself from her new-found lover. "I'm going to check for myself and if it's not there...then I'm coming back."
"Swan, stay!" But try as she might, her efforts proved futile as the blonde removed both of them from the table's surface and after scooping the brunette into her arms, she went towards the kitchen.
Hoarse laughter filled the air.
THE END.