Disclaimer: Victorious belongs to Dan Schneider & Nickelodeon.
Jaded
A Victorious Oneshot
Jade...
Their words are screaming louder now, playing like a broken record in your brain. Briefly, you think back to a time when it wasn't like this - when daddy still loved you and you'd show up to school in brightly colored clothing and no one thought of you any differently.
Back when you had friends that really knew you; that really loved you. Back when it was all lollipops and sugar plums. Before you started waking up to frightened screams and loud slams. Before you grew curious and crawled into the living room to find your mom laid out on the floor.
"Jadey," she'd call sweetly in a slur. "Mommy wasn't watching where she going and tripped over the coffee table. That's all.
But you were smart enough to know better.
You're lucky to have...
You miss all the innocence. Playful and happy, cheerful and content. You miss being careless and carefree - and the only thing that could bring you down was a scraped knee (which, of course, was quickly remedied with a Hello Kitty bandaid and a cherry red Maybelline kiss.
Cherry red, you think.
It reminds you of Cat. The red-headed girl who is still all of these as a teenager.
Oh how you envy her.
Beck...
He was your ticket to normal; you used to think. The hot Canadian boy with fluffy hair. Sweet and caring, willing to look past your layers and see the scared little girl underneath. You're so jaded it's rediculous.
But lately, it seems he's just seeing the illusion everyone else does.
Big, tough Jadelyn West with a "Do Not Touch" sign on her forehead. Note the fangs.
Don't be...
That's when your reversible personality breaks free. Good goes inside and the bad comes out. You're back in black and it feels so wrong, but at least you feel safe. No one can touch you when you're hiding behind these steel walls.
And even if they try, once they see the beast, they'll leave screaming.
Yeah, they won't be bothering you again.
Such...
The anger bubbles up in your throat. You just want to scream and sink your claws into bloody flesh and rip it apart and cut it with your beautiful blades because that's what they all do to y o u.
What goes around, comes around.
You're going to make sure of that.
A...
And maybe it was meant to be this way. But why?
What did you ever do that your "friends" didn't? You were nice, you were polite. You had no warrants. Well, in all truth, you still don't. But with the way your own father and classmates look down at you when they think you can't see them, you might as well.
You're a monster.
But you already knew that, right?
Gank...
Did you expect anything less?
Yeah, I don't know. I never do when it comes to angsty kinda things, like Take, Trina Who, Pop Goes The Carly, and whatever else I wrote. I really shouldn't write angst in these two fandoms. It never works out right. xD
Also, look for the sequel to this: VindiCADEd. Personally, I think its better than this one. But whatever. :)
Lots of Love, Ellie!