Inspired by the song Jesse's Girl by Rick Springfield.
LOL someone mentioned Harry Potter in a review and I read it while I rewatched the episode with Doy :) This is absolute crack shipping at its finest, not even close to making any sense, and I have no idea where this came from, but here it is. Sorry for the quality. I just wanted to write something goofy :)
A/N: In case anyone forgot, Emma Weathersbee is the girl who Ava thought she was losing Auggie to. The really polite one who is absolutely charming. Apparently she will be portrayed by actress Sanai Victoria in GM Commonism.
Characters have been aged up to thirteen.
Rated K+ for Keen Observations
Disclaimer: I do not own GMW but I love writing stupid stuff with the characters!
"It's just not fair." Dewey grumbled, picking at the mac and cheese on his plate. "Why does he get the prettiest girl in school?"
Emma rolled her eyes. "Doy, really? Are you still talking about this? Ava rejected you years ago. Let it go."
He ignored her, still moping, "And they keep fighting and they're always on and off. You would think she would realize they're not good for each other and she'd look for someone who worked better with her."
Emma sighed, picking up her sandwich again and taking a bite, deciding it was better to just let him get the rant out of the way than try to dissuade him of his crush.
"I mean, she's like, Draco Malfoy. And Auggie is Harry! They don't work!"
"So what? Are you saying you do?" She rose a brow. "Because technically, by your argument, you'd be Ron. In which case, Ava still wouldn't fit with you."
Dewey realized the flaw in his statement and his cheeks burned a little red.
"Wait, that's not what I meant."
She shook her head in disdain, her twist-out corkscrews bouncing around her face.
"Doy, can't you see that you're being ridiculous? You're grasping for straws trying to think of reasons why your best friend and his girlfriend don't work. They've been together for eight years. You lost before you even had a chance."
He cast her an annoyed look. "I'm not being ridiculous. You don't know if they'll last long. Isn't that why you went after Auggie one time?"
Her eyes narrowed at the reminder of her unfortunate crush on the boy. "Yes, but I realized Ava loves him. No point trying to get between a couple that will definitely go the distance."
"It just bothers me…" Dewey sighed, crossing his arms, "I never even got a chance to show her we could be perfect together. How does she know Auggie is the one? It could be me."
"The what-ifs don't matter in the long run. What matters is that Auggie and Ava are together and you can't do anything about it. You need to get over her."
"Easier said than done." Dewey groaned, contemplating plopping his face into the plate of macaroni. "I can't stand it. They're always kissing and holding hands and being lovey-dovey right in our faces and we have to suck it up and pretend like it doesn't bother us."
"You have to pretend like it doesn't bother you. I'm fine with it."
He frowned. "Don't you still a crush on Auggie?"
"I got over it."
"What?" he asked in confusion, "How?"
Emma chewed on her sandwich contemplatively. "I like someone else now."
"You have a crush on someone?" he scoffed incredulously, "Who?"
"Perry, the transfer student from Spain." She replied, a little vexed. "Why do you sound so surprised? Is the thought of me having a crush really that weird?"
"I never said it was weird…" he looked a little put-out. "I just didn't think you would ever be interested in anyone else."
"Well I am."
"Okay. Sorry."
They sat in comfortable silence eating their lunches for a while, Emma reviewing some notes for Mr. Matthews' history test later that afternoon. Dewey still picked at the mac and cheese dejectedly. There had to be some way to get Ava to notice him.
"Say, you're her best friend. Does she mention me? Like, at all?"
Emma winced, averting her gaze from Dewey's hopeful expression.
"I mean… she did once…" she hesitated.
His eyes lit up. "Really? What did she say?"
"She, uh…" Emma folded her lips over to keep from laughing. "She compared you to Tinkles."
"Who's Tinkles?"
"Tinkles, her dog."
He smiled happily. "Because I'm cute and cuddly and loyal?"
Emma snorted. "Because you have the same face…"
Dewey's face fell and Emma rectified her amused expression, feeling a little sorry for him.
She sighed. "Alright Doy. Tell me why you have such a huge crush on her."
"I don't know." He shrugged. "She's pretty. And her hair smells like vanilla and she's got the cutest laugh and smile, and she's just Ava."
Emma shook her head. "Those are all physical traits. Do you even know all that much about her?"
"I know she binges on chocolate cake when she's depressed."
"Yeah. Because I told you that." Emma set her crumpled napkin on her tray after wiping her mouth. "Face it. You only like her because she's pretty. If you hung out with her for an extended period of time, I'm sure you would lose your crush in a matter of seconds. Nanoseconds even."
"You don't know that."
"Oh yes I do. It takes a special kind of person to be able to put up with Ava Morgenstern and trust me, you are not it."
"Well I still think I deserve a chance."
"You know, maybe you should stop pining after Ava so much and start looking for someone who you fit with." Emma shrugged nonchalantly, "Someone who actually works with you."
"There's nobody out there for me..." he whined, slumping onto the table and pushing his tray away. "And I'm not even sure who to look for."
"There is somebody out there for you. And look for someone who whips your butt into shape and doesn't let you be an idiot. Someone who keeps you sane and grounded. Someone who listens to your problems, cares about you, and watches out for you. You haven't been able to find anyone because you're still stuck on a girl who didn't want you when you were six."
She stood up with her tray when the bell rang signifying the end of lunch.
"In the meantime, you had better give up on Ava. Because Auggie is your best friend. And I'm sure he wouldn't appreciate you thinking about his girlfriend like that."
"You're right…" Dewey mumbled as she walked towards the tray dump.
Dewey remained in his seat, feeling a little bummed out. Emma had a point. It was about time he moved on from Ava. It seemed like Auggie and Ava would be together forever, and he wasn't going to try to ruin his bro's happiness over a girl. There was nothing he could do about it. But he still didn't know who was out there for him. He couldn't think of anyone else he knew.
Emma came back to the table to grab her stuff. "Don't you have band after lunch? Shouldn't you be leaving?"
"I'll leave in a second." He glanced up at her. "Hey, Emma. Who are you, by the way?"
"What?"
"In the Harry Potter world. Who would you be?"
She chewed her lower lip pensively for a moment, brows slightly furrowed as she thought about it.
"Huh. I guess I'd be Hermione?" She picked up her books and headed out of the cafeteria. "I'll see you after school, Doy."
He waved goodbye and then stood up to dump his tray as well, his mind still on the Ava issue.
It was easier to say he had to find someone who was perfect for him, but he didn't know where to start. He supposed he could listen to Emma, but finding someone who she described was much harder than it sounded. First of all, he didn't talk to all that many girls, much less ones who would be interested in him. And the ones he did know got exasperated with him more often than not. They much preferred the simple charms of his curly haired best friend.
Besides, the only person he knew who matched that description was Emma.
"Wait..."
And then he froze.
If he was Ron, and Emma was Hermione...
"Oh."