Cloud vs Link (you know that weird freak form Zelda)
One day, our wonderhero was joyfully, skipping around Midgar (er nah that's not like Cloud)…………….er he's really doing something really heroic and saving the world UNLIKE that pointy hat wearing weirdo Link! Ahem……anyway, suddenley Cloud falls through a weirdo vortexy thing and ends up in, none other than ……….(dum dum dum dramatic music) Hyrule!
Cloud goes sliding into a large tree like object……………no wait it actually is a tree, and whacks his hair into a relatively normal flat hairstyle.
Cloud: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! My hair, my precious hair!
Cloud whips out some 'Ultima Hair Gel' and sets about making his hair all spiky again.
There is a galloping in the distance and our green clothes wearing buddy Link arrives, until Epona comes to a very quick halt, throwing Link into the same tree that Cloud fell victim to.
Cloud, having finished perfecting his spiky exterior, stands up, triumphantly, to notice Link spralled on the floor.
Cloud:??? Er, who the hell are you?
Link quickly gets to his feet.
Link: Ahem, I am the Hero of Time, Link of Hyrule!!! (heroic music plays)
Cloud (thinking): Where's that music coming from?
Epona slowly moves in front of Link's stereo, and kicks it into the nearby river. The music gradually fades out.
Link: Hey where's my music gone? (looking around…..and only then noticing Cloud looking at him in aver strange way)
Link: er……………………so whaaasssssssssuuuuuuuuuuuuuuppppppppp!!!!!!
Cloud: huh? Must you scream in my ears, they are very delicate you know?
Link: so the real question is who the hell are you, why are you here and GO AWAY!
Cloud: erm lets see, I'm Cloud, I'm sure you know me, I saved the world from Sephiroth and Meteor etc.
Link: (with a blank look) er, nope
Cloud: ooohhh………………..*sob* All I wanted was a little recognisition that's all, but oh no you have to go and shatter me self-confidence……..(curls up in a corner and crys)
Link looks at him, and signals at Epona. She walks in front of Cloud, turns around and whacks him with her hooves back into the vortexy thing, alllllllllllllllllllll the way back into Midgar.
Link: What a wimp!
Link mounts Epona and rides off to save some stupid Zelda who (guess what kids?) has got herself stuck in some tewwible disaster that only think gay little weirdo with the infinite item bag can save her from.
Back in Midgar:
Cloud goes sliding into a big building, once again mucking up his newly constructed hair again.
Cloud: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Not again!!
Cloud once again whips out his trusty 'Ultima Hair Gel'. But, horror of horror's there's none left!
Cloud begins to freak out big time, but managed to pull him self into a nearby general store.
Cloud: ahh…..need………………..hair………….gel…………….or what's gonna happen…………Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! I can't save the world with flat boring hair!! That's just not Final Fantasy!! All the FF characters have to have ridiculous haircuts!! I can't be left out!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
Store bloke: Whoa! Calm down!! (hands Cloud some 'Ultima Hair Gel' There ya go………………
Cloud: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (blobs the disgusting stuff onto his hair and is revitalised) Daa Daa!!!
Cloud: I'm ready to face that little weirdo now!
Rushes outside and runs towards the vortexy thing…………….but misses and splats straight into a building.
Cloud: owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww (finally finds the entrance and goes through)
Cloud goes to Zelda's castle and finds Link in the middle of fighting Ganon to save the poor helpless Zelda once again.
Cloud: Haahaa! It's me again!
Cloud does his twisty sword thing and places his sword on his back, but it's too heavy for him, so he falls flat on his back from the weight.
Cloud: whoops…………………
Link: What ARE you doing?
But this moment of lack of concentration allows Ganon to fire a big yellow ball thingy, killing our little Link.
Cloud begins to laugh hysterically, and he laughs and laughs until he can laugh no more, so he has to sit down, but then he gets up and laughs some more.
Cloud then, summons Bahamut Reborn, finishing off Ganon.
Then, Zelda and Cloud rude off into the sunset, but not before mashing Link's body to a pulp.
Cloud: Mwww…HAHAAHAA!!! (evil laugh)
THE END