In the Shadow of Doubt
Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue.
Genre: angst
Rating: PG-13
Notes: Haven't written fic in such a long time. For some reason I was
inspired to write this sequel to "Labyrinth of the Heart". In any case,
please tell me what you think I enjoy the criticism.
Summary: Sequel to "Labyrinth of the Heart". Lori's views on what happened
to Merton and her thoughts about him and his life as she knew it as she
tries to convince Tommy to go on with his life.
Hospitals, Lori hated them, always have since she was a little girl. And here she was at one. They needed someone to identify the body, Merton's body, and Tommy refused to do it. He said he couldn't. So it was up to her. She wasn't thrilled.
The morgue is a cold place. Cold and metallic, like a bad dream. Lori watched, numb, as they pulled out the long metallic litter that held the once full of life Merton Dingle. They pulled back the sheet slowly, and she cringed when she saw his face.
This wasn't her Merton; his face was too pale, his lips too thick. His raven hair had lost its shine, the almost formless spikes hung limp and lifeless. She wanted nothing more than to smooth that hair back in place, to caress his clammy cheek and wipe away the bruises and cuts.
Tears welled up in her eyes when the sheet slipped and exposed his chest and shoulders; black bruises covered them.
She left then; she couldn't stand the sight of him anymore. She couldn't stand looking at that strange pale face that only slightly resembled him.
Lori felt weak, helpless in the position to do nothing about the situation. As if that wasn't bad enough she still had to face Tommy with the cold reality that it actually was Merton. He'd been in denial the entire time and refused to believe that it was; he kept saying that it wasn't really him but a very close facsimile of his best friend.
It was mid afternoon when she arrived at Tommy's house. His parents, worried looks upon their faces, answered the door.
"Hi," she said quietly.
"Hi Lori. Come on in, he's upstairs. He's been up there all day, he won't come down," Mrs. Dawkins said, stepping aside to let her in.
"Lori," Mr. Dawkins pleaded, "He hasn't eaten anything all day. I was wondering if you could maybe convince him to come downstairs and eat something, even if it's just a sandwich."
Lori sighed. She didn't want this; it was too much to be placed on her shoulders, but she'd try because Tommy was her friend and she loved him and was just as concerned about him as his parents. She told them as much.
Walking upstairs she tried to work out what she'd say to him. Nothing came to her mind. She didn't know Tommy as well as Merton did, and, she felt that at times she had come in between that relationship. She hadn't meant to honestly, but she did. Sometimes she couldn't understand how two people so different could be friends and she often wondered what made Tommy like him so.
She stood outside his door wondering what to do now. She waited a moment and knocked.
"Tommy, it's me Lori. Can I come in?"
There was no answer, just silence. That worried Lori, but she knew Tommy well enough that he wouldn't go that far.would he? Doubt welled up inside her and made her heart race. She tried again.
"Tommy, please answer me. I just want to talk to you."
A minute passed, which seemed like hours, and in her feverish mind passed all sort of horrible scenarios. Finally, she heard the shuffling of feet and the door opened.
Lori almost burst into tears. The person who answered the door was Tommy, but looked nothing like the Tommy she knew. The Tommy she knew was bright and cheery with a mischievous grin that lit up the whole room. This Tommy that now stood before her was nothing but a wraith, empty and cold. He was pale and quiet; his cheeks sunken in and black circles under his eyes like he hadn't slept in days. His eyes, swollen and red, held none of the laughter that was once there.
He just stood there and stared at her not saying a word. Tears welled up in Lori's eyes as she looked at him trying to think of something to say and nothing would come. Her heart ached to go out to him, but she knew that nothing she could say would ease his pain or make him feel slightly better. But to put her mind at ease and those of his parents, she knew she had to try, for their sakes as well as Tommy's.
Lori just didn't plan on it being this hard.
"Can I come in?" she said quietly.
Tommy shrugged, turned and sat on his bed, fresh tears started to well up in his already tear swollen eyes. He didn't look at her, but stared at a picture that was sitting on the bed.
Lori tried, but to no avail, to avoid looking at the picture. It was taken only a couple of weeks ago when they were all happy. It was of the three of them at The Factory holding up bowling balls and grinning. Life had seemed so simpler then, well as simple as it could get for the three of them. And in one moment it had all come crashing down on them.
She looked back up at Tommy and struggled to find the right words. In the end she just heaved a sigh and placed her hand on her shoulder; it was all she could think of to do.
"I'm here for you you know."
Tommy looked up at her and managed a weak smile. "I know," he whispered. "It's just so hard. I never imagined anything ever happening to him because I would always be there to protect him."
"It wasn't your fault you know."
"It feels like it is. Listen, I really appreciate you coming up here and all, but I really want to be by myself right now."
Lori sighed. "All right. But I'll only leave if you promise me two things."
"What?"
"That you'll at least eat something and you won't hurt yourself."
Tommy smiled thinly. "Got to you did they? All right. I promise I'll go eat something, and not to hurt myself." He hesitated for a moment. "Did you really think I would do that?"
Lori hung her head. "To be honest, I didn't know. I didn't know if you would be able to go through with something like that. Well, anyway, I should be going. I suddenly feel like a long bath." She leaned down and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and turned to leave. As she was closing the door she looked back at him and tried to smile. But she felt a coldness rise up in the pit of her stomach that grew and gripped her heart.
Nothing would be the same, not ever again.
Hospitals, Lori hated them, always have since she was a little girl. And here she was at one. They needed someone to identify the body, Merton's body, and Tommy refused to do it. He said he couldn't. So it was up to her. She wasn't thrilled.
The morgue is a cold place. Cold and metallic, like a bad dream. Lori watched, numb, as they pulled out the long metallic litter that held the once full of life Merton Dingle. They pulled back the sheet slowly, and she cringed when she saw his face.
This wasn't her Merton; his face was too pale, his lips too thick. His raven hair had lost its shine, the almost formless spikes hung limp and lifeless. She wanted nothing more than to smooth that hair back in place, to caress his clammy cheek and wipe away the bruises and cuts.
Tears welled up in her eyes when the sheet slipped and exposed his chest and shoulders; black bruises covered them.
She left then; she couldn't stand the sight of him anymore. She couldn't stand looking at that strange pale face that only slightly resembled him.
Lori felt weak, helpless in the position to do nothing about the situation. As if that wasn't bad enough she still had to face Tommy with the cold reality that it actually was Merton. He'd been in denial the entire time and refused to believe that it was; he kept saying that it wasn't really him but a very close facsimile of his best friend.
It was mid afternoon when she arrived at Tommy's house. His parents, worried looks upon their faces, answered the door.
"Hi," she said quietly.
"Hi Lori. Come on in, he's upstairs. He's been up there all day, he won't come down," Mrs. Dawkins said, stepping aside to let her in.
"Lori," Mr. Dawkins pleaded, "He hasn't eaten anything all day. I was wondering if you could maybe convince him to come downstairs and eat something, even if it's just a sandwich."
Lori sighed. She didn't want this; it was too much to be placed on her shoulders, but she'd try because Tommy was her friend and she loved him and was just as concerned about him as his parents. She told them as much.
Walking upstairs she tried to work out what she'd say to him. Nothing came to her mind. She didn't know Tommy as well as Merton did, and, she felt that at times she had come in between that relationship. She hadn't meant to honestly, but she did. Sometimes she couldn't understand how two people so different could be friends and she often wondered what made Tommy like him so.
She stood outside his door wondering what to do now. She waited a moment and knocked.
"Tommy, it's me Lori. Can I come in?"
There was no answer, just silence. That worried Lori, but she knew Tommy well enough that he wouldn't go that far.would he? Doubt welled up inside her and made her heart race. She tried again.
"Tommy, please answer me. I just want to talk to you."
A minute passed, which seemed like hours, and in her feverish mind passed all sort of horrible scenarios. Finally, she heard the shuffling of feet and the door opened.
Lori almost burst into tears. The person who answered the door was Tommy, but looked nothing like the Tommy she knew. The Tommy she knew was bright and cheery with a mischievous grin that lit up the whole room. This Tommy that now stood before her was nothing but a wraith, empty and cold. He was pale and quiet; his cheeks sunken in and black circles under his eyes like he hadn't slept in days. His eyes, swollen and red, held none of the laughter that was once there.
He just stood there and stared at her not saying a word. Tears welled up in Lori's eyes as she looked at him trying to think of something to say and nothing would come. Her heart ached to go out to him, but she knew that nothing she could say would ease his pain or make him feel slightly better. But to put her mind at ease and those of his parents, she knew she had to try, for their sakes as well as Tommy's.
Lori just didn't plan on it being this hard.
"Can I come in?" she said quietly.
Tommy shrugged, turned and sat on his bed, fresh tears started to well up in his already tear swollen eyes. He didn't look at her, but stared at a picture that was sitting on the bed.
Lori tried, but to no avail, to avoid looking at the picture. It was taken only a couple of weeks ago when they were all happy. It was of the three of them at The Factory holding up bowling balls and grinning. Life had seemed so simpler then, well as simple as it could get for the three of them. And in one moment it had all come crashing down on them.
She looked back up at Tommy and struggled to find the right words. In the end she just heaved a sigh and placed her hand on her shoulder; it was all she could think of to do.
"I'm here for you you know."
Tommy looked up at her and managed a weak smile. "I know," he whispered. "It's just so hard. I never imagined anything ever happening to him because I would always be there to protect him."
"It wasn't your fault you know."
"It feels like it is. Listen, I really appreciate you coming up here and all, but I really want to be by myself right now."
Lori sighed. "All right. But I'll only leave if you promise me two things."
"What?"
"That you'll at least eat something and you won't hurt yourself."
Tommy smiled thinly. "Got to you did they? All right. I promise I'll go eat something, and not to hurt myself." He hesitated for a moment. "Did you really think I would do that?"
Lori hung her head. "To be honest, I didn't know. I didn't know if you would be able to go through with something like that. Well, anyway, I should be going. I suddenly feel like a long bath." She leaned down and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and turned to leave. As she was closing the door she looked back at him and tried to smile. But she felt a coldness rise up in the pit of her stomach that grew and gripped her heart.
Nothing would be the same, not ever again.