Author's Notes: Hi everyone! I know some of you will have seen this story before, I originally put it on a seperate account but you know what...I kept forgetting about it over there so I thought I'd just go through it and pop it up here instead! Some bits will be true to books, others not. So...I hope you enjoy it. As the first several chapters are already written and have been posted previously I will be reading them through to check for any obvious errors and then posting them as quickly as I can. I will most likely have at least another one or two chapters up today. Also in case any of you are following my other unfinished stories and thinking I've abandoned them for yet another new one I will reiterate that this is an existing story previously posted on another account not a new one and I do hope to find the time to finish all my unfinished stories at some point.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, the books, films, characters or any other recognisable parts of the fandom nor do I make any money from this. My writings are purely for my own and hopefully your enjoyment so please feel free to review as well

Spontaneous Combustion

Prologue: The Problem with Hermione...

Hermione Granger had a problem, and usually solving problems was her thing. Anything that challenged her brain, anything that required logic but this time her problem wasn't really something she could research.

The second wizarding war had shaken the wizarding world in ways none of them could have ever predicted; the ministry had specialist teams now working on wizard and muggle relations! After centuries the wizarding world was considering revealing itself but of course not yet and not before much serious consideration but the fact that it was even brought up was a huge step towards breaking down blood prejudice. Hermione like many others had returned to Hogwarts, some of the students had to repeat the previous year, others chose to take their NEWTS early if they thought they could pass so that they could get on with their lives elsewhere. Hermione did both.

She had taken her NEWTS when offered and passed of course although she would always wonder if her current status in the "Golden Trio" had anything to do with that but unfortunately there wasn't really a way of knowing for sure. Then after discussing her plans for the future with the remaining order members that were now friends and family to her after everything they'd been through she was give an offer she couldn't refuse.

Hermione was returning to apprentice for a position as Charms Mistress and she couldn't be more excited, especially since she wouldn't be the only student returning to apprentice. There would also be a potions and transfiguration apprentice although she didn't know who would be filling those positions yet, they were going to be students from her year so she would almost certainly know them. The biggest surprise to the staff for the reopening of Hogwarts was that Minerva McGonagall had hired Professor Lupin back for at least one year. Remus had been hesitant not wanting to spend much time apart from his wife who currently lay in St Mungos indefinitely but the older woman had managed to convince him that something to keep his mind occupied would be good for him and he would still have plenty of time to visit her and spend time with his son who spent most of his time at the Burrow as Molly was enjoying an excuse to coddle someone and insisted that since she was home all day anyway she could look after Teddy perfectly well for Remus while he worked.

Minerva had taken over the role of Headmistress at Hogwarts and as such needed to find a transfiguration teacher to replace her as soon as possible, so far she had found a temporary replacement from abroad that would stay for the duration of one year to train an apprentice. With Professor Snape gone Horace Slughorn had agreed to also join the staff for another year in order to train a replacement, and finally whilst Professor Flitwick who was not currently planning on retiring was going to be the deputy Headmaster therefore taking on more duties as well as being the Head of Ravenclaw house, his apprentice: herself, would be helping to take some of his classes as well as occasionally being a substitute for Professor Lupin during certain times of the month.

Hermione was thrilled to have been offered an apprentice position, also since she had more than a year to complete her apprenticeship she was able to study for her wizarding degree at the same time which didn't come as a surprise to anyone since Hermione Granger dubbed "the brightest witch of her age" always excelled academically, nothing was too much for her brain...

Although actually it was, she now had a problem she couldn't solve and no amount of reading about the subject in books appeared to be helping either. After the war she and Ron had become a couple officially, the catch was there wasn't a spark. Once the heat of the battle was over that spark had gone, although it took her a while to notice because she did care about him. Of course she cared about him; he was one of the most important people in her life and she would've love for their relationship to work out but unfortunately...it wasn't. There was no thrill to their kisses and she didn't seem to be able to get turned on when they tried anything further...Ronald Weasley just wasn't doing it for her.

She had tried everything she could think of, she had read books for further ideas. They had tried extensive amounts of foreplay; she had tried aphrodisiacs but only the milder kinds. She wanted her lust to be because it was hers; not created falsely by a potion, she knew there were potions that could make her lust after him but it wouldn't be real and that didn't solve the long-term problem. She didn't happen to fancy anyone else currently either, so it wasn't that and they'd tried every romantic setting she could imagine. She'd tried lingerie to make her feel sexier and put her in the mood and instead had just felt self conscious and awkward. She'd tried reading erotic books both wizard and muggle kinds to inspire her and get her in the mood and even though some did just that, once she and Ron got started her desire would taper off. All in all she was getting a little bit disheartened that she could make her relationship with Ron work if she couldn't be attracted to him in that way. It wasn't that she found him unattractive and she was pretty sure she fancied him still but when it came to the bedroom department everything went flat.

So for the moment she was resorting to doing the job herself when she got overly frustrated and keeping it a secret from Ron, after all it was embarrassing enough that no matter what he did she couldn't get excited by him but for him to find out that she was pleasuring herself when she was alone in bed was beyond humiliating for her. Well...not to her personally, after all she was fairly certain most people did it every now and then but it would be horrid to talk about it, for someone to know about it!

Although if she was honest it usually took quite a lot of effort to pleasure herself so it was no wonder than Ron struggled...she considered that perhaps there was something wrong with her physically but since she was able to pleasure herself even though it did take a long time she decided that the problem probably wasn't a physical one. So what was the problem? Was she simply very high maintenance in that department?

She was still pondering this as she made her way to the Headmistress' office only to have her thoughts brought to an abrupt halt once spotting the two other people in the office with Minerva McGonagall.

"Miss Granger I was wondering if you'd received my message." The older witch said as Hermione entered the room. "Please take a seat Hermione."

"Sorry, I only received it a few moments ago I hadn't been to my room yet and it was there waiting for me." Hermione said sleepishly.

"Lost in the library no doubt." The familiar blonde snorted slightly, earning a narrow eyed look from the headmistress and Hermione herself. She assumed that since she was here to discuss her apprenticeship that the two other students in the room were the apprentices for the other two positions. Draco Malfoy was a surprise, she knew he was intelligent but with his reputation currently still being as colourful as it was it was a shock that he would be working in a classroom. No questions about it though he must be the potions apprentice. The other surprise was Luna Lovegood, wasn't she still supposed to be a student?

Minerva sat them down and explained their schedules and the rules, which would and wouldn't apply to them as they were still technically students but also members of staff so fell into an almost in-between status. Afterwards Hermione took the chance to quiz Luna on her position as they headed to the great hall for something to eat.

"I took a few of my NEWT's early to be able to take the position, I still have some NEWT classes to attend but I have enough free sessions to take on the position and one of the NEWT exams I took early was transfiguration. I'm not allowed to take a class without another Professor supervising me until after December though when I turn seventeen that was the Ministry Education Boards only other stipulation." Luna explained. Hermione didn't know why she was so surprised, after all Luna was a Ravenclaw so she was bound to be intelligent but she still frowned over the fact that Luna had been allowed to take some of her NEWT's early and she had not. "They made a special exception in allowing me to even sit some my NEWT's early so that I could take the job and that was only because Professor McGonagall insisted that she couldn't think of anyone else she wanted to take the position." Luna supplied as if sensing what was bothering her.

"That's great Luna, congratulations." She smiled.

"To you as well, I hear you're doing your wizarding degree at the same time? That's really quite impressive." Luna smiled back. "It'll be nice having a friend doing an apprenticeship as well and we'll get to be Professor's here together, plus I'll still have a few lessons with Ginny a week."

"I can't believe that after everything I still have to face Draco Malfoy every day." Hermione sighed. "I mean I know he wasn't as evil as we all thought but still he wasn't nice to us either...least of all me." She shuddered thinking about Draco and his father watching on as she was tortured. He did nothing to stop his Aunt carving her arm up in his house. She tugged her sleeve down self consciously, as if to make sure every inch of her arm was covered when she knew the scar was higher up than her wrist and wouldn't be on display. Draco Malfoy may have been given a second chance but she wouldn't ever be able to forget the years of hexes and insults he had thrown her way.

Author's notes: short I know but I'm currently juggling a toddler and an 11 day old baby so you'll have to bear with me for the moment. Also please note to all American readers I am writing this in British English not American English so if you're sat their thinking I keep spelling words wrong just bear that in mind.