Stranger Than Me?
Written by laceduplolita
Disclaimer I do not Emily Strange or any characters that you recognise from the books and merchandise. It all belongs to Rob Regner, Buzz Parker and the brand Comic Debris.
Trudging through the tapered darkness into the creepy castle I call my heaven, I met my twisted, delightful kitty friend. My one sidekick I should always trust - Miles.
You will notice him. He's the only black cat with six claws to my knowledge.
If you upset him, you will be tortured like no one has been tortured before. I have my ideas - I could build a trap from every little implement in my basement and lock you up for eternity, trapped within the gates that prevails many creatures to haunt you from every little black cat and zonster to skirmish.
Be warned.
And whoever calls Miles or any other devillish black cat of mine a Grimalkin should face the most devastating death the world has ever seen. Would you like it much if you were trapped within those gates, and even worse, to be confined in a small space with my fellow zonster, Pillowgoat. Don't you dare snicker wildly at his name. For his name is nothing but a disguise. A bluff as you wish.
And me? Well, you'll just have to find out, won't you?
Don't think, I'll just reveal all my atrocious secrets to complete strangers who know nothing more but to sneak around and nose about. This is all my business. If you want to read me, fine. But don't go running to me when you have a what-do-you-call-it a "boo boo". Now that has just got to be the most ridiculous word of all literature if you ask me.
Just run along child.