Chapter 1: From Manhattan to Washington DC

'' Where are you going?'' asked Isabelle Lightwood to her brother.

Her voice was inquiring, but also filled with cautiousness. It always seemed that way now – cautious – whenever she spoke to him. Izzy was right to do so though, as everything seemed to set him off these last few days.

More accurately, since seven days ago.

Shaking the thought out of his head, Alec focused on the shirt he was folding, not looking at her. He didn't have to look to know that she was still wearing her black clothes, just like him, that she had shadows under her eyes, just like him, and that she had tears stains on her cheeks, just like him. His sister was suffering too, maybe not at the same level but still. The eldest one had to remind himself of that before he answered her; otherwise, his voice would be as sharp as the shards of his heart and he didn't want to hurt her.

'' San Francisco.'' he simply answered, zipping his bag. He really didn't need a lot. It wasn't like it would be a long trip anyway, just the time to go there and back.

'' Really? When?'' Izzy asked, incredulity laced in her tone. Even if he was pointedly not looking at her, he was ready to bet she had an eyebrow quirked up in her signature 'elaborate and don't you dare lie to me' expression.

He placed the luggage on the ground before slumping on the bed. '' Tomorrow morning.'' he simply said and even to him, he sounded tired.

Alec heard her footsteps approaching him, but still kept his gaze steadily on his joined hands. He felt it in the dipping of his bed when she sat besides him and his stomach knotted with stress. He knew of his sister's sadness, he was pretty aware of it, and if she asked him to stay, he would. Even if he wanted – no, needed – to go to maybe heal, the young man would stay if she said the words.

So he tensed, waiting for his sister to speak.

Joining her hands to his, Isabelle leaned on his shoulder and sighed. '' Okay. I know you need it. I'll tell mother and father only when I'll know you'll be far.''

It was a mixture of affection and guilt that pooled in Alec when the words made their way in his mind. His shoulders relaxed and his breathing became slightly easier again. She was letting him do this, so soon after they just had lost... well, a brother. But then how had he dared to doubt, it was his sister that he was talking to. She understood his grief more than anyone.

In gratitude, he squeezed her hands in between his.

'' Just tell me one thing...'' she trailed off. For the first time, Alec glanced up at her, meeting her onyx eyes that shined with old tears and actual worry. '' Will you be alone?''

Just as she asked, the eldest Lightwood's phone chimed. Not leaving Izzy's side he extended his hand to grab the device and looked at his notifications. He had received a new mail. Or more accurately six new e-mails, and all from the same sender: 'Amigo Express'. It could only mean one thing.

'' Not anymore.'' Alec answered to his sister while opening briefly the few mails he had. '' Seems like a certain 'Magnus Bane' registered to six of my seven trips.''

Amigo Express was a web site that promoted car pooling for long distances. A driver – like Alec – could register the date, hour and destination he was going and allow a certain number of passengers, for a small fee, to ride with him. Being the poor student he was, the young-man really couldn't afford travelling to the west coast and back without some financial help; hence, why he had subscribed there. Yet, being the introvert he was, he had only opened one place for each stops. One stranger in his car all day long was enough. It could have been a different person each time, he didn't care.

And now it seemed like that 'Magnus' had taken the spot for each stops, starting at Manhattan and ending at Los Angeles.

'' Let's hope you get along with him then.'' softly smiled Isabelle, looking over his shoulder at the screen too. Even in the darkness of the room, she had clear signs of relief on her features. Surely the idea of her brother not being left alone on the road with a grieving heart was reassuring.

Giving one last squeeze to their intertwined hands, Isabelle got up and headed out. She had had all the answers she wanted, understood the reason for his weird behaviour at the funerals earlier – one did not plan to leave in the early morning without telling anyone with ease – and was now reassured. Though before leaving, she turned around, her silhouette dark and bold against the light that entered the room from the corridor, and said one last thing:

'' Do call from time to time.'' she said in an almost casual tone. The undertone was clear though, this wasn't just a suggestion, it was an order.

The door closed in a soft 'click' and Alec was now left alone in his poorly lit room.

Rapidly, he prepared himself to go to bed. 'It was late', 'he was tired', 'he had to get up early tomorrow' were all good enough reasons he told himself to justify that he was going to bed at 8:15 pm. Today's funerals really had drained all his energy, not that he'd had a lot to begin with. Ever since... 'he' died, Alec felt like a constant weight had been placed over his shoulders. The feeling had only worsened when he had seen the jar of ashes today right besides the lively picture of -

'Stop!' he told himself, shutting his blue eyes tight. Alec could still lure himself into thinking that it was just a bad dream, a terrible joke...

Lying down under his covers, he placed his cellphone back on his bedside table, right over an old folded piece of paper. That little piece of paper was the reason he was going to San Francisco, He had to do this. It was maybe the only way he could ever hope heal from the pain he was feeling in his soul.

And it would all start tomorrow morning when he would meet up with that Magnus Bane...

6'o clock saw Alec waiting right in front of the American Museum of Natural History. Leaning on the driver's side of his car, the young man had his eyes closed, breathing in the morning air of the city. Inhaling the not yet warmed by the sun air and exhaling warm white puffs out of him. Simple motions that calmed him a bit. Already all around him, people were moving, passing by him as quickly as the spring breeze. A tornado of different person, each minding their own business, yet somehow at the same place at the same moment.

He felt so disconnected.

Bringing him back to reality, he heard the sound of small wheels rolling, nearing him. Opening his blue eyes to the world again, he glanced toward the sound and saw a guy with what looked like a big travelling suitcase. He most have been twenty-two, not that much older than Alec, and had black hair. Those were the only similar traits. Exotic, he bore the skin colour and shape of eyes of someone from the extreme east. Colourfully clothed, his smile seemed easy, almost flirty, and he walked with assurance. Even if he didn't know where he was going, confidence followed the guy like a shadow.

Coming to a stop right in front of Alec, he raised his eyebrows, making his green eyes shine in questioning. '' Alexander Lightwood from Amigo Express?'' he asked.

'' Hum, yeah.'' quickly confirmed Alec, rising from his leaned position. Extending a hand as any polite person would, he quickly amended: '' But it's just Alec.''

The guy took his hand and shook it. '' Magnus Bane.'' he declared, but Alec had already presumed so. Still, something clenched in him when he heard the confirmation. He would have to travel the whole country alone with that handsome guy by his side? How could it become anymore awkward? Oh yeah, by adding the fact he was doing this to mourn over someone.

How pleasant.

Shaking the thought out of his head, Alec focused back on the present. '' I-I'll help you with this.'' he said, nodding at the others' luggage while extending a hand to take it.

Magnus only smiled, letting him do. '' My, my, such a gentlemen. Thank you.'' he said, sending a wink. The guy then walked toward the passenger seat and took place.

Once everything was set, Alec returned to his driver seat. Maybe 6 am was considered early for others, because in the short time it had taken him to place Magnus' luggage in the trunk of his car and come back, the guy was already asleep curled up against the window. At least he had his seat belt on. Managing the tiniest of smiles – he didn't have the heart to smile, but that sight was forcefully inducing one on his lips - the blue-eyed young man started the engine.

First stop would be Washington DC.

The sun was now high in the morning sky, illuminating the grey road and trees here and there that were planted on its side. The radio was playing so softly, one would have to strain its ear to hear it. It was just white noise and the channels were limited. In an hour they would enter the urban landscape of Washington. It was only then that Alec noticed from the corner of his eye that his passenger was fidgeting, awaking.

Indeed it wasn't long before Magnus yawned, stretching from his ball position he had kept for the whole three hours he had slept through. At first, his complete immobility had worried the blue-eyed young man. Yet when the light snoring had filled the silence, it only reminded him of how his younger brother Max can sleep everywhere. Like cats, they just had to settle in a position and they could doze off through anything.

Secretly, Alec found that adorable.

'' Good morning.'' said Magnus straightening in his seat. '' It's still morning, right?''

'' Washington is not that far from New York, yes it is still morning.'' answered flatly the Lightwood boy. Then he added in a shy tone. '' Good morning to you too.''

Laughing a bit, Magnus shook his head as he tried to place his dishevelled hair back in order. '' Sorry I wasn't such good company. I am not an early bird.''

'' It's alright. But... you do know that all of my departs are early, right?'' asked Alec, sending a questioning sideways glance toward the other.

Groaning, Magnus hid his face in his hands. '' I know! Why do you hate me so much?'' he exclaimed, surprising the driver.

'' W-what? I, I don't... Well, you know.'' began Alec, confused. His joint were white from his tight clutching on the wheel. He didn't hate him, the guy hadn't done anything for that. He was even pleasant to look at, so why was he thinking that Alec hated him?

Bursting into laughter, Magnus smiled at him. '' Don't look so troubled, I am kidding.'' he said, and relief filled Alec, relaxing his hold on the wheel. '' I know we will depart early everyday, but I'll manage. Anyway, with blue-eyes like yours, I think I have the perfect incentive.''

'' Hum...'' was the only noise that could answer him.

Blushing hard, Alec was feeling more and more destabilized. What should he say:

'Thank you'?

'I am sorry'?

'Really?'?

'You too.'?

'Stop kidding with me'?

He couldn't choose and he was pretty sure some of the things he had come up with were not really coherent.

Thankfully, he didn't have to come up with an answer. Magnus continued the conversation as if nothing happened. '' So, tell me, Alexander, why San Francisco?'' he asked with an absent-minded tone, his attention all on the content of the glove box in front of him. '' You don't mind if I check your CD, right?''

'' No, go ahead.'' Alec softly said.

It was the only thing he had the time to say before his throat knotted and his head started to get dizzy. Already the awkward part he was dreading? The blue-eyed young man should have expected that question, they were two strangers with the common goal of their destination. Still, he wasn't ready to think about it, never mind that he would never be ready to think about it. As if it was the heaviest object in the world, Alec was now overly conscious of that small folded piece of paper in his pocket. He could feel a rogue tear trying to escape him, but no, he wouldn't have it. Wiping it away with rage, he could feel the sorrow induced headache that was attacking him.

Witnessing his inner turmoil, Magnus had stopped his music analysis and was now looking at him. His green eyes were filled with worry and confusion, but he must have felt Alec's discomfort as he lost his easy smile.

'' You are okay?'' asked the latter, his voice sincere and concerned.

Alec only nodded, taking a deep breath. Breathing helped, even if he always felt like he was on the verge of suffocating. Then, taking one of his shaky hands off the wheel, he took out the folded paper he had in his pocket to show it.

'' This... this is why I am going to San Francisco.'' breathed out Alec. He appreciated the fact that Magnus did not try to take it and see. He simply waited for Alec to tell him about it or to allow him to take it.

'' What is it?'' simply asked the other.

'' It's a list of things my... my b-brother and I wanted to do when we would go there.'' said the blue-eyed young man, his voice breaking when he mentioned his brother.

Placing the paper back to its pocket, he cursed his weak voice. Why was he left so broken at the mere thought of him? Maybe because now that he was officially on the road, he couldn't deny his brother's death anymore. Because now, talking about him to Magnus made it surreal yet too real at the same time.

'' Your brother?'' softly said the latter.

'' I... He passed away.'' added Alec, clutching at the wheel again to at least keep himself steady. Even if he hated it, he would have to admit it. And maybe somewhere deep down it did him good to talk about it. '' So I want to do everything on our list.. for him, you know?''

There was a moment of silence that Alec didn't even notice, to focused on keeping his eyes on the road. He slowed down a bit, just for safety purpose.

'' What was his name?'' asked Magnus again. Feeling Alec's uneasiness, he added: '' I am sorry for your loss, but if you are doing this for him, I think it would do you good to say his name.''

'No...' whined in his thought Alec.

He really didn't want to say it. He didn't want to admit it. But Magnus was right it would be better for him to start somewhere. Did it have to be so soon?

The weight in his chest and the pressure in his head just seemed to worsened.

'' His name was... It was... It's Jace Herondale.'' finally spilled out Alec, but it was just so hard. He couldn't even use the past tense. Still, even if his throat constricted at it, the name felt so familiar, so right in his mouth. He really missed calling it out. '' Jace.'' he repeated in a lower tone, just because even if it hurt, it felt so good too.

He didn't know how much time he spent silent, but a soft voice brought him back. '' He doesn't share the same family name as you.'' noticed Magnus.

'' Well, he wasn't my brother per say. We adopted him officially, but we don't share the same blood. No he was more than than, more than a brother, more than a friend just... more.'' tried to explain the blue-eyed young man.

'How to define Jace?'' he wondered, because really his friend was quite the complex being.

To everyone, he was like a lion. Majestic, but ferocious, determined and charismatic. To his closer circle, he was a rose, beautiful and loved but with thorns that didn't hurt if you were aware of them. To Alec, he was like a flame; alluring and strong, he could burn away all of the blue-eyed's worries like he could inflict those painful burnt wounds, yet like the flames of a candle, he was fleeting too, and in need of protection.

'And you weren't even there-'

'' More? Like a boyfriend then?'' asked Magnus, interrupting Alec's mind. Good thing too, because they were heading a direction he would like to avoid. A direction that would have led him to pull over and take a break.

Glancing at his passenger, he saw an intense curiosity in the others' features, as if he was particularly interested in the answer. '' No.'' he said, shaking his head vehemently. '' No one understands, it's like... Well, he was like the lithium cation to my fluoride anion.''

Their was a small pause before a laugh escaped Magnus' lips lightening the atmosphere. '' You talking science to me is endearing, really. But if I want to understand what you are trying to say, I'll need a translation.'' leisurely smiled the other.

'Endearing?'

Feeling suddenly hot, Alec sighed of amused relief. Of course he had to switch into his scientific self when he was embarrassed – not like it would save him from embarrassment anyway. '' It means we are hardly separable, because the ionic link is one of the strongest link right after metallic-'' he began to interrupt himself.

Why was he saying that again? Oh, yeah, to clear off that he doesn't have a boyfriend, that Jace was not his boyfriend. '' Well, it doesn't mean I can't make other link. There is molten salt that adds beryllium to the lithium fluoride compound...''

From the half-confused, half-amused glance he was having, Alec was pretty sure it wasn't helping. 'Try again without chemistry.' he told himself.

'' What I mean is no, I don't. Not don't want, but just don't have a boyfriend. Yeah that. So, can we talk about something else.?'' he muttered, feeling warm in the face.

'Smooth, Lightwood.' he thought, as he opened the window at his left. The gust of wind had a relaxing effect on him as he could breathe better. At least, with all his flustering, the headache had ceased and the lump in his throat disappeared.

Daring a glance at his right, he saw green eyes filled with amusement and an ail too pleased smile. At least someone was enjoying his communication skills.

'' Sure, so what is the first thing on your list?'' said Magnus finally deciding on the CD he wanted to listen.

As the other was putting the CD in the player, Alec caught a glimpse of it. He wasn't surprise to see it was an indie group. With the sight of Washington nearing in front of them and the cool breeze coming in from the opened window, the jumpy notes of the guitar managed to clear the atmosphere even more.

'' Jace has a knack for history and war and weapons in general... No, he isn't a psycho!'' exclaimed Alec, feeling suddenly defensive at Magnus' stare. '' So we wanted to go to the Navy Cold War Gallery, then the Spy Museum to finish with the African American Civil War Museum.''

'' Wow that is a lot of museum in one day.'' said Magnus after he'd whistled his surprise.

'' Well, it wasn't supposed to be a one day trip, but I can't really afford longer all by myself...'' he regretfully murmured. Normally, he would have shared the fee with his friend. They could-

'' Ah, but such is the hardship of a... chemistry student?'' teased Magnus with a grin. Again he had interrupted some dangerous musing, and Alec couldn't have been more grateful.

Even though the gratefulness, blue eyes scowled at him. '' Chemical engineering actually.'' he stated with a false tone of indignation. Just as he said that though, Alec realized that Magnus had had the upper hand in their conversation. He had shared about a lot – more than he would have thought for the first day – but didn't really know anything in exchange. He wasn't regretting, the green-eyed guy had been a good listener, but it hardly seemed fair. '' What about you?''

'' A minor in photo-journalism and a major in sociology.'' simply shrugged Magnus. '' Nothing as fancy as science.''

'' Science is not superior.'' quickly snapped Alec. Taking a deep breath, he calmed himself a bit. '' Sorry, it's just... So many people seems to think that you won't have a job if you don't go in science.''

'' Or into business.'' continued on the same tone as him Magnus. His grin seemed a bit more forced now. '' I know, my parent didn't like me going into photography.'' he sighed more to himself then. The blue-eyed young man was under the impression that he wasn't meant to hear that. '' Anyway, can I come with you?''

'What? Where?' asked himself Alec before echoing his thoughts. '' What? Where?''

'' The museums, Alexander.''

'' Oh.'' only said Alec, thinking as he was parking his car. It was eleven now, they had reached their destination of the day, the Navy Cold War Gallery. Technically, until tomorrow at five am, he didn't have any obligation toward Magnus.

Nevertheless, did he appreciate the others' company? Yes. Did he want to do this alone? No. Would Jace be mad if he went with someone else?

'Would he?'

'' You know, if it's something you have to do alone, I can understand.'' said Magnus, as Alec was still caught in his thought. He then got out of the car to go search his luggage.

His heart pounding fast, the blue-eyed New Yorker quickly followed. Was he mad? Should he apologize? Help him with his luggage and say nothing? When he reached the other guy, Alec didn't even have time to do any of these.

'' If you are free for supper.'' began Magnus writing on a small paper with a blue pen that he had probably grabbed from his bag. '' Here is my number Call me.''

Slowly taking the paper, Alec looked at it, not knowing what to do. Turning his startled blue eyes up, he saw that Magnus had already gone, walking away. He knew he would see him tomorrow, he was his 'amigo express' after all, but still he felt bad and a bit disappointed to see him leave.

Taking out his phone, he immediately opened his text app.

From: Alec Lightwood

To: Magnus Bane

Message (sent at 11h:07am): 150 State Rte 31 N, Washington, NJ, The Royal Diner at 6?

The silhouette of Magnus stopped in his track, got his cellphone out and swiftly turned toward Alec. Even from the distance that was separating them, he could see the brightness of the smile.

From: Magnus Bane

To: Alexander Lightwood

Message (sent at 11h:08am): The Royal Diner? Fan of 'Bones'?

Alec let out a small scoff, thinking about all those hours – more like days - Jace and him had had spent watching season to last season on his computer.

From: Alec Lightwood

To: Magnus Bane

Message (sent at 11h:10am) You are forbidden to call me 'Electron' or something

From: Magnus Bane

To: Alexander Lightwood

Message (sent at 11h:11am): Don't worry, when I'll give you a nickname, it will be much more original than 'electron'

Rolling his eyes, Alec placed his phone back in his pocket. Doing so, his hand brushed against the folded list. With Magnus away, his heart grew heavy again.

He felt alone, yet too surrounded too. He felt like everyone around him – all those strangers just walking by – were too many and like he didn't belong to the mass. A woman and her child passed by him and an irrational anger flared in him.

The blue-eyed young man just wanted to be left alone, he felt so jealous of those who weren't.

Turning toward the gallery, he sighed under his breath: '' So tell me, Jace. What is the story behind this one?''

Disclaimer: Characters do not belong to me, thank you google maps for the information on America's geography, I do not own Amigo Express neither, nor any popular culture thing I may have mentioned or will be mentioning.

All this was inspired by the song 'Rest Calm' by Nightwish.