Hi guys, here it is a new story, an Outlaw Queen Au.
I hope you like it and let me know if you want me to keep with it, your reviews are very important, so here we go :)
Chapter 1.
Regina is in her car, waiting for the school bell to ring and announce the end of another working week for everyone.
If there's someone that deserves a peaceful weekend with her boys after a chaotic working week at the firm, that someone is Regina Mills. She just can't wait to spend some time with her family. She'd been even thinking about taking the boys to a fun weekend at their house in the lake, since her sons always love it there, and Regina can take the chance and forget about her work for a couple of days, it's perfect.
She loves her work, really do, but sometimes, the court hearings worn her out more than it should, and she can tell this week hasn't been the worst. She doesn't want to think about what was yet to come, but she knows that, as soon as she steps into the office Monday morning, Sidney will give her this new case, one that she didn't even know the details yet, but she already can say that she hates it. Child custody. It's always painful for everybody, including the child, and being a mother of two boys, she hates to see that her job is partially responsible for a child's sadness. She tries always leave those cases for someone else if it's possible, but at this moment, no one is available and it's her job after all, she would have to put up with it.
As the school bell rings, Regina spots immediately her ten-year-old son walking down the few steps that separate the schoolyard from the large building, as he heads towards their car, carrying his bag on the back.
He doesn't seem too happy, and Regina has an idea why, but she can say she's not ready for this. The only thing she wants is to get home, make some snack for the kids (and maybe for herself) and get settled with them on the couch to watch a movie, or even one of the episodes of their cartoons for the umpteenth time. Why they insist on seeing the same thing over and over again, she doesn't understand, but at least for today, she's not even too much worried because she's sure she won't get through the opening scene. She's too tired and she just really wants an excuse to rest for a bit before starting to get everything ready for the weekend. There are clothes to pack, the house to clean, and she's sure she'll have to stop on the way home to buy diapers for Dylan since the 'potty training' is taking longer than she thought. Just what she needed.
It's the sound of the back door opening that brings her back to reality, as Henry pushes aside his brother's baby seat and tosses his bag onto the free spot, the heavyweight causing the pack to fall to the floor with a muffled thud.
She tries to ignore the fact that he slips into the seat beside her without picking up the bag (being a single mother, she had to learn to relax a little if she didn't want to go crazy with this type of things), but this time, his attitude is just an echo of his foul mood, and he should know already that she hates when he acts like this, in a rude way, "Henry, can you pick the bag?"
"I'll pick it up while you get Dylan," he answers, making her let out a breath as she starts the car to make their way out of the school parking lot. It's not worthy, Regina knows the reason for her son's bad temper, and it's always the same thing at this time of the year. It had been like this the year before and it would be like this the next one, and she couldn't do anything besides handling it as best as she could.
"How was your day?" she tries to change the topic, noticing how her son shifts in his seat, turning his face to the window and shrugging his shoulders. Why he insisted on shutting her out, she didn't know, but she didn't like it, not even a bit. It would be easier if he just talked to her and let her help him, "Henry..."
"I'm not going to school on Monday, okay?" he answers, rolling his eyes and turning to the window once again.
There it is, part of the reason for his mood.
Regina tightens her grip on the wheel, her breath changing its pattern as she fights to control the tears. If Henry thinks that this is just hard for him, he's totally wrong, Regina wanted to tell her son, but it wasn't worth it to argue with him. Besides, if he didn't want to talk, then she's the mother and she is the one in charge, "That isn't up for discussion," she hears Henry sigh, whining a 'mom' before turning completely to her to try to give her his best puppy look, but she's able to ignore, as she had learned to do after this ten years, "But we can talk about the weekend. Do you want to go to the lake house?"
"You are just asking that to make me feel better about Sunday and Monday," Henry argues, returning to his grumbling self.
Sunday is father's day and every year, on the Monday after, in one of Henry's classes, they used to do something to celebrate that day. It was usually a gift to offer the parents, and Henry used to love it, but after Daniel's death a year ago, her son begged Regina to let him skip that day of school the year before and she'd allowed him. The worst thing she could've done. This year he wanted the same, but he would have classes. He couldn't run from that day forever.
"Henry, Mary Margaret's not going to force you to do something you don't want-"
"You talked to my teacher?" Henry asks, annoyed, widening his eyes and turning completely to face his mother now that she had parked the car in front of his brother's day care, "I can't believe it, mom."
"Henry, I'm your mother, I want the best for you," she sighs, unbuckling her seat belt and cupping his cheeks in her hands, just for him to pull back from her touch, "I'm sorry, but you'll go to school on Monday," she shakes her head, collecting her bag from the back seat before opening her door, "And we'll go to the lake house this weekend. My job is a demanding one and I need to rest," she gets out of the car, trying to convince herself that her son in not right. She doesn't want to run away these two days because of her fiance's death. She just wants to rest and have a good time with her sons, "And I want the bag out of the floor before I come back."
Henry watches as his mother walks towards the building, wiping what he thinks to be tears in her eyes, before he gets out of the car to fix his bag. He didn't want to go to the lake house, not without Daniel. Swimming in the lake and riding horses around the field, was not the same without a father figure to join him. Who would teach Dylan when he was older? Their mother could play that role, but it wasn't' the same. Returning to his seat, Henry waits until his mother returns to the car, placing his two-year-old brother in the baby seat, before driving them back home.
###
Saturday morning Regina wakes earlier than usual to get everything ready for their small trip. The bags with the clothes were already done and waiting for them at the front door, but she still needs to pack Dylan's things and clean the house a little. There are baby toys splattered all over the place, as well as Henry's books placed over every table in that house. She just doesn't understand which book he is reading, so he would have to pack a bag for him if he wanted to take one with him for the weekend. Maybe this would take longer than she initially thought. She should start with the breakfast so when Henry wakes up, he could eat to then pack his things.
So she makes her way towards the kitchen, looking around to see what she can cook that can suit both herself and her two boys, since there is no time for a large buffet. She ends up deciding for juice and toasts, knowing that it wasn't the pancakes her sons loved at the weekends, but it would have to do.
As she was finishing putting the pieces of bread in the toaster, she's is interrupted by her older son's footsteps as he enters the kitchen, yawning and rubbing his eyes while he makes his way towards the benches at the counter to take a seat, "Morning, mom."
He seems better, not so moody as the day before, but the real challenge would be the following morning, at the father's day, so maybe Regina should enjoy it while she can. Making her way towards her son, she wraps her arm around his shoulders and drops a kiss on the top of his head, before she runs her fingers through his hair to fix his bedhead, "Good morning, baby. Juice?"
"Yes, please."
She pours the drink into two cups, as well as Dylan's baby's bottle, and focuses her attention back on the toasts. She would just finish this and then she would wake up her baby son so he could join them in the kitchen.
Henry is already sipping on his juice, his elbow placed on the table as he lazily places his head in his hand, almost sleeping on his feet.
She knows why he probably hadn't slept peacefully, and it's breaking her heart to see her baby like this, their fights don't help one bit - and Regina knows that - but it's hard for her too, and she just wanted him to understand that.
"Don't worry, I bet you'll sleep better today after a two-hour ride and a day in the lake," she says, making him frown at her and ask what she's talking about, "Shouldn't you know already that I know you and your brother better than the back of my hand?"
She notices how the corners of Henry's lips start to tilt up, and is enough for her to feel better. He was in a better mood and was starting to accept this weekend, and she's sure it will be good for everyone. He would be having fun in no time.
"I'll get your brother. Eat your toast," she says, placing the plate with the snack in front of him before dropping a kiss on the top of his head once again and making her way towards the door.
He would end up overcoming this. He just needs time and something to keep him entertained. That's exactly what Regina planned to do.
###
The two-hour ride hadn't been so bad as she thought. Usually, Henry would put his headphones on and Dylan would fall asleep after three minutes on his seat, but this time, she actually managed to keep a conversation with her older son, letting him get lost in his music from time to time so he wouldn't get bored of her.
She knows he also needs his space. Regina doesn't want to let him isolate himself and have him feeling much as she has been feeling lately: lonely, but she wants him to know that he can talk to her, don't wanting to push him either. He will talk to her when he feels comfortable with it, especially about Daniel's death. This is why she keeps herself from falling in love again. Of course, it's too soon for that anyway, but even thinking about the future, Regina doesn't see herself letting some other man entering her life, not when that man would be a role model for Dylan, just as Daniel was for Henry. Besides, she couldn't afford to subject her kids to one more loss if anything happened or case things didn't work out between her and another man, and she needed to think about her sons, they were the priority, not her.
So two hours just flew by and when they realized, they were already in their lake house, carrying all the bags inside and filling the rooms. The house has three chambers, Regina's, her parent's and one for her sister, who Regina is sure had never set foot in that place.
She couldn't judge her. Until she has her own family to share a few days with, Regina had never been a fan to spend her vacations in this place. Not that she didn't like it, but after her father's death, she didn't see the reason why she should visit the house, until she met Daniel. The stable boy her mother had hired and had immediately fired after Regina had fallen for him. He'd been the first person to make her drive two hours every weekend with a two-year-old, just to see him.
They were twenty-one at that time, and after being a mother at nineteen, Regina knew her mother would never approve their relationship. Cora would always say she needed a grown man to help her raise 'the brat she insisted on keeping', and she had actually introduced her to one of her rich clients when she was helping him with the death of his wife. Leopold Blanchard. He didn't even have the chance to meet Henry, Regina knew their 'dates' wouldn't last and she didn't want him near her newborn child.
Daniel, on the other hand, had been more than a father for the boy. He'd raised Henry with Regina, and after six years together, they'd had their own child, just for Daniel to die when Dylan was months old. It was just another thing to have her mother bugging her about. Instead of helping her, and Henry, to deal with grief, Cora had always said that Regina had got into another trouble for getting pregnant again, so she hadn't even made an effort to meet her grandsons.
Fine for Regina, she doesn't want her boys near her either.
Pushing away her thoughts, she focuses on making the beds. Regina would sleep with Dylan, afraid to let him by himself in a room where he didn't have a baby bed to keep him from falling, while Henry got settled on one of the other rooms.
She had everything ready, and after packing a quick lunch for them, they make their way towards the lake, for a picnic as a family and a refreshing swim in the water.
###
With a steady focus on her boys, Regina smiles to herself and takes a deep breath of fresh air. Henry and Dylan are by the water, playing and splashing each other, while she remains in her towel, enjoying the sun and waiting for a call from her best friend.
Regina actually considered to save these days just for the three of them, but Henry is so close from her friend and her boyfriend that she knows this visit will be good for him. The thing is, she should have arrived already. She said she would call as soon as she stepped into the property, but, so far, the brunette hadn't heard from her. Maybe she's being impatient, maybe she should try and enjoy this time alone with the boys, but she can't deny she's really excited to see her older's son reaction to the surprise, she's sure he will love it.
"I knew you would be here," Regina hears from behind her, causing the brunette to turn around to see her best friend and her boyfriend staring at her with warm smiles on their faces.
"Emma," Regina chuckles, standing up and wrapping her arms around her friend in a hug, "I thought you were lost."
Regina shifts her attention to Killian to greet him, at the same time her sons run towards the blonde to launch their arms around her and encircle her in a hug as well, "We just went to the house to leave the bags. The door was open, I hope it's okay."
"Of course," Regina smiles, watching as the boys return to their spot by the water with Killian, at the same time Emma gets herself settled in her towel beside the brunette.
Emma is one of Regina's closest friends, had been the new student in Regina's class when she got into college, and one of the few persons who had kept in touch when the brunette got pregnant and had to drop the classes. At the time, it had been awful for Regina, have to give up from her career to start a family so soon, but then, when she settled down with Daniel after three years, she had been able to get back to college and balance her personal life with the professional, earning an invitation to work at the firm where she was currently. She couldn't say it hadn't changed her life completely.
"So, how was the ride?" Regina asks, watching as the blonde lets herself fall back to the cloth, her back hitting the floor with a heavy sigh as her arm raises to cover her eyes in a dramatic gesture.
"Long," she complains, moving her arm so she could keep the sun out of her eyes at the same time she looks at her friend and offers a smile, "Killian didn't let me drive."
A genuine laugh leaves Regina's body at the thought of an annoyed Emma complaining the whole ride. She loved to drive and having to remain in her seat the whole time while another person was driving her own car could be awful. But Regina understood why Killian did that, Emma was a bit too excited when it comes to driving, and probably her boyfriend just wanted to have a smooth ride. Nothing strange there, "I would invite you to drive my car tomorrow, but Dylan has to sleep, otherwise he'll get grumpy."
"Very funny," Emma replies, causing another chuckle to leave the brunette as they change their gazes towards the boys, "How is Henry?"
Regina's eyes shifts for her older son, but her smile fell from her lips quickly at the reminder of the reason for her best friend to be there, "Better. We'll see tomorrow."
"Regina, he just needs help to get through this," Emma tries to assure, rising to sit up straight and look at her friend. Regina's just staring blankly ahead of her, no expression on her face and Emma wonders if she's just trying to pretend to be brave or if she's really thinking about something, "How about you?"
"Pardon?" she replies, turning to face the blonde with a puzzled look on her features, "Me what?"
Emma rolls her eyes, removing the hair from her face before she turns back to the brunette once again to answer her, "Are you holding up?"
"Emma, I think I can handle a loss better than a ten-year-old. It's Henry I'm worried about."
"I don't doubt that."
Regina sighs heavily at her friend's response, trying to focus her attention back on her sons, but she could feel Emma's burning gaze on her, and she knew there was something she wasn't telling her, "But?" she asks, taking the blonde by surprise, "Spit it out, Swan."
"Henry's dad," she finally says, causing Regina to frown and regret immediately for pushing her to talk. She should know already that Emma was up to no good, so why was she so stubborn? She should have let her with her thoughts, "Did you never wanted to know about him? Let Henry know about him-"
"Henry knows about him," Regina argues back, standing up and preparing to leave before the conversation goes too far.
"Well, yeah, but he doesn't know who he is."
That's because he doesn't need to know, Regina wants to reply, but instead, she keeps her composure, places her hands on her hips and explains, "I don't want my son near a man like him," and it's true. What he'd done to her was far from right and she didn't want her son to have a dad who didn't know how to treat women, "Now, will you stay here or will you join us in the water?"
Emma rolls her eyes, already expecting her friend to run away from that topic, but she doesn't insist, instead, she stands up too, grabbing Regina's hand and running towards the boys.
...
Regina rushes towards her sons to join them in the lake. Henry startles at first, but when his mother picks him up and falls with him into the water, he can't help but play along and laugh with her.
He loves when she is this relaxed. Her job tends to leave her stressed and worried, but otherwise, she would always play with him and his brother, and they would always have a good time, "Mom, what was that for?"
Regina wraps her arm around his waist, laughing as she swims with him towards the water's edge so he could get on his feet, "You were in need of a dip-"
"Mommy!" their conversation is interrupted by the cheerful cry of her younger son, who has his arms stretched up to her and seems to want to play as well.
"I think you need too," Regina giggles, picking him up and entering the lake so he could be waist-deep, Henry following right behind.
Emma remains at the edge with Killian, with their arms around each other and foreheads pressed together, exchanging a few kisses when they thought anyone was paying attention to them.
"Eww, mom, gross," Henry says, pointing at her mother's friend and burying his face in the crook of Regina's neck.
She can't help the laugh that leaves her body. He used to have the same reaction when she and Daniel kissed in front of him and they always needed to break the kiss due to their laugh. They would even do that to tease their son, but today, she's on her kid's side so she will play along with him, "Henry, ready for some fun?"
"Can I, mom?" he asks, his eyes lightening up at his idea.
Without thinking twice, Regina nods her head, and before she knew, her son was swimming towards the couple, stopping a few meters from them and throwing water everywhere around his mother's friends, making Emma freeze in her spot.
Regina knows she's in trouble as soon as the blonde's eyes meet hers, but she can see the amusement in them as well, so she remains in her spot, holding her younger son and praying that having a two-year-old in her arms would be enough to stop any payback.
###
She lays Dylan in the middle of the king-size bed, putting some pillows beside him to keep him from falling while she makes her way towards Henry's room to check on her older son.
She has been thinking about what Emma had said at the lake and she doesn't know why, but she can't help the fear she is feeling towards the possibility of Henry's father be looking for them. No. It isn't possible. He doesn't know about the boy and she'd made sure that it would remain that way. Henry doesn't need his father, especially being him. Besides, in Henry's mind and heart, his father was Daniel and it was exactly him who Regina has seen in that role as well. He was the father of her two boys and she didn't want any other men in her life, she already had two to fill her heart.
Leaving her older son's bedroom and without any wish to go back to bed and keep thinking about that issue, Regina continues her path towards the kitchen to fill a glass with fresh water and pour it down her throat. She has to ease her mind if she doesn't want to be up all night. She needs to rest, knows what day will be tomorrow and knows even better that it will not be easy, even if she has already a surprise planned for Henry. Maybe it's also that that is helping to keep her awake, the anticipation to know if he will be okay with that or if he'll just think that she's pushing him too soon.
"Still awake?" Emma's voice interrupts her thoughts, almost making her choke on the drink as she turns around to face her friend.
"Can say the same about you," Regina replies, placing the glass of her water back into the sink and watching as the blonde walks towards the counter to pull a chair for her to sit. Just what she needed, having her friend pushing her to talk about this issue in the middle of the night, when all Regina wants is to be able to go back to bed and fall asleep, "I was just checking on Herry, what it's your excuse?"
"I heard you and I thought I'd keep you company," Emma shrugs, ignoring the defensive tone in Regina's voice, even if she knows her friend too well to know that it's not the only reason for her insomnia, "So, you want to go back to bed?"
No, she doesn't. If she comes back upstairs, she will just keep thinking about this, so she can either talk about her plans with Henry the next day and ease some of her worries, or she will lose a night of sleep, "I'm going to take Henry to ride tomorrow."
"You will? That's great," Emma replies excited, watching as she sees a small smile appearing on Regina's lips. She knows how afraid Regina is to see Henry's reaction. Riding horses was something they used to do with Daniel and the brunette is afraid she may hurt her son with her suggestion, but Emma doesn't believe that, she really believes Henry will love it, so when her friends corrects herself and says that it's only if he wants, she's quick to assure that he'll, he'll want for sure to go for a ride with his mother, "And I'll watch Dylan for you."
"Thank you, Emma," Regina replies sincerely. She knew she could always count on her friend, even if sometimes she was too much snoop and liked to give her own opinion about other people's business. But Regina knew she just wanted to help, and at this moment, she could use a bit of her goodwill, "Emma, do you think I'm selfish for keeping the secret about Henry's father from him?"
Emma sighs, shaking her head and looking straight into Regina's eyes, "That was not what I meant with that conversation-"
"I know," Regina assures, afraid to make her friend feel guilty about that, "But I'm asking if you think that Henry should know. He's suffering from Daniel's death and maybe this could give him hope."
Emma almost cringes at that. The last thing Regina should do is give him hope for another father when she doesn't want him in Henry's life. Besides, he wouldn't forget about Daniel just like that. He had been his father almost since the beginning and no one would erase that from his mind, "Regina, I thought about that and maybe you're right. Probably it's an awful idea if you don't want them to meet. Would you want to introduce them?"
"What? No," Regina widens her eyes, remembering what he had done to her when they slept together, "I just wanted Henry to feel better knowing that his real father is still alive."
"He knows that," Emma explains, trying to make her see her point on all this, "You said he knows his father is out there somewhere. Why telling him who he is if you don't want them to meet?"
Emma is right. This is all a crazy idea that she is building in her head due to her tiredness. She should go to sleep and let Emma do the same. But who could judge her for wanting to see her son happy? She is just a mother, after all, and every parent wants the best for their kids, she's not any different.
"Regina, would it be so bad if they met each other?" she hears after a moment of silence, turning to look at her friend disbelieving. Emma knows what had happened, knows how Regina had started to fall in love with him before he had hurt her the way he did, knows how hard her life had been when she discovered she was pregnant at nineteen, and she still wants her to bring him back into her life when she's finally free? Not a chance. She just wants peace now, to raise her boys in her own way, "It would."
Emma nods, not wanting to argue about that issue anymore, "Alright, you should sleep. You have a big day ahead tomorrow."
"I have," Regina agrees, making her way towards her bedroom to see if the sleep could claim her now.
###
The next day, Regina tells Henry about her idea, earning her one of Henry's smiles she loved and a bear hug from her baby. She hasn't seen him smile like this for a while now and it warmed her heart. She knows father's day can be hard for him, just as it is for her, after the tragic events about a year ago, but they would have to overcome that, and what better than a mother and son day? They could enjoy their time together and it would keep their minds entertained for a while. They were determined to enjoy it the best they could.
It's just after lunch when they make their way towards the stables, and Regina is finishing getting her horse ready for their ride. Pride, it's his name. Henry had chosen it a few years ago and Regina had never been able to change it. She actually likes it, and she loves this steed, it reminds her of her Rocinante, her horse for most of her youth.
Regina had offered Henry to be him to take it, but his eyes are fixed on another horse, mare, that she knows also too well.
Finishing up with her saddle, she hands the reins of her horse to her son and offers him a smile as she closes the door of the steed's compartment, placing her hands one her waist and looking around before address the boy, "So, which one it will be?"
She notices how his gaze shifts to the floor, at the same time his hand stops on the horse's face, caressing it.
"Mom, I wanted..." he starts, but the words die in his throat when he raises his head to look at Regina.
She knows what he wants, and she doesn't blame him for it. Despite he has his own horse, Henry used to ride that mare with Daniel, so she's not surprised when he wants to take her for their first ride after Daniel's death.
She cups his face, drawing a lazy pattern with her thumb on his cheek as she continues for him, "You want Daniel's mare."
As she was expecting, Henry nods his head, the best he can under Regina's grip, "Are you mad?" he asks, wrapping his arms around his mother when she closes the distance between her and her son, pulling him into a hug and holding him against her.
"Of course not, honey," she assures, placing a kiss on the top of his head before make her way into the mare's compartment to tack her up, "Now let's get her ready for the ride, although I think you know how to do this and are just using me for your benefit."
That grants her another chuckle from her son. He actually knows how to tack up the horse, but it'll be safer if it's his mother doing it and, besides, he's having fun with Regina's steed.
"Mom, you never showed me a picture of Rocinante," Henry remembers, caressing the horse's neck and failing to see the look on his mother's face.
It's still difficult to talk about it, it had definitely been her special horse, even if she has Pride now, which she loves it, but Rocinante had been with her at various times of her life, even through the most difficult ones.
"Remind me when we get home, alright?" she smiles, approaching his son and switching the reigns with him. She doesn't mind talking about Rocinante with her son, she actually wants to tell him everything about him, but she doesn't think this is the best moment since they are here to having fun.
"Should we get out of here, then?" Henry gets up on the horse, waiting for his mother to do the same as he challenges, "I bet I can beat you in a race."
"Slow down, champ," she giggles, guiding both horses out of the stables, "That mare is not that young anymore, you've to spare her."
"Alright, we go to the tree on the other side of the field and that's it."
She eyes him suspiciously, bringing her index finger to her lips as if she is considering his offer. Of course, she won't say no, the run it's good for the horses to exercise and the field is perfect to take the ride, besides, Henry is more than ready for a race, "You had me."
Henry smiles at her, positioning his mare beside Regina's horse to start counting, "On my mark."
"Okay," Regina replies, listening closely and smiling when his son leaves ahead of her. She's so proud of him. She and Daniel had taught him to ride at an early stage and she planned to do the same with Dylan. She just hoped she could count with Henry to help her this time.
...
Regina helps her son to get off from the horse when they reach the tall tree. She'd let him win, of course, and now she would have to hear him bragging about it the rest of the day. Not that she minds, all she wants is to see him this happy, so if she needs to lose a few horses races and have him talking about it the whole day, she'll gladly do it, as long as he keeps that smile on his face.
She seats with him against the trunk, wrapping her arm around his shoulders and allowing him to lean against her. She missed their moments like this, when he would just allow her to hold him in her arms and to spoil him, even if the reason for this one is not the best.
She thinks how Daniel would like to see him grow, would be proud of him if he could see how Henry seems to remember everything he'd taught him, at least about the horses, and she just hopes she doesn't mess with it when it comes to Dylan. She'd taken her younger son to the stables a few times, had taken him for some rides with her, even when Henry didn't want it, but she's a mother, and it lacks her the adventurer side that will allow her son to improve. She's afraid to gallop with him on the horse, and she remembers quite well the first time Daniel did that with Henry, he'd almost three years old, and she was panicking, she trusted Daniel, but she hadn't been able to stand by and watch, at least for the first time, so she'd received them at home, with some cookies and milk, and she'd chosen to trust that task to her boyfriend. Now she couldn't do that, so if she wanted Dylan to follow in the footsteps of his father and brother regarding the horses, she'd have to leave her fears behind and do the things on her own.
"Mom, I miss dad," her thoughts are interrupted by her son's voice, shattering her heart into million pieces as she hears those words and, in that moment, it just makes her feel even more selfish for keeping information about Henry's biological father from him. He's already old enough to know some things and the last thing she wants is to make him feel he's in the dark about this issue. She wants to help him, and she knows that questions will probably start to appear at some point, so why don't make him feel comfortable about it? She's even quite surprised that he hadn't asked anything so far, but she thought that it wasn't something in his mind while he had Daniel to raise him, but what about now? Regina is afraid he's holding himself for her sake.
"I know, baby, me too, and... Henry, I know nobody will ever replace Daniel as your dad, but," she rubs her hand across his back, caressing him as to make sure he knows everything would be okay, "I want you to know you can talk to me about your real... biological father," she corrects, knowing that Henry would say his real father is Daniel, and she didn't want him to use that to run away from this talk, "Do you want to ask me something?"
She waits as Henry thinks for a moment, and Regina feels that few seconds of silence lasting an eternity. She thinks how she'll explain to him that her pregnancy had been unexpected, and how she knew, at that time, that his father wasn't prepared to take that responsibility so soon in his life. She hasn't even given him an opportunity, but knowing him as she knew, and after what he'd done, she decided she didn't need him, so she'd chosen to move on with her life. It had been better for everyone.
"How was he like?" she hears Henry's voice from beside her, pushing her away from her thoughts once again, and she can say she wasn't expecting that question, was expecting him to ask why he'd never met his father, why she'd hidden him from him, but she never thought he would want to know anything specific about him, "I mean, do I look like him? I always thought I looked like Daniel."
A sad smile appears on Regina's lips. Of course, he thinks he looks like Daniel, even if he's practically all Regina's side. Henry needs a male figure to follow and it's no surprise that he'd chosen Daniel.
"And here I am, thinking you had taken everything from me," she giggles, kissing the top of her son's head and tightening the grip around his body, "but I can make you a picture if you want."
It's better than telling him the whole story about her pregnancy. At least this way her son could picture his father in his mind and probably have a better image of him than the real one. Not that she liked the idea of fooling her son, but he wouldn't meet the man, so what harm could do if, in his mind, his father was a decent guy?
She feels her son's head nod against her chest, since he still didn't have moved from her embrace, so she takes a deep breath, recalling in her mind the significant features of her son's father, and starts, "He had blue eyes, really adorable dimples and, on second thought, I think I lose when it comes to your hair. You have his color," she says, those last words almost a whisper as she runs her fingers through his hair.
"I wanted blue eyes, like Dylan, like Daniel, like... my father," Henry confesses, and as selfish as it seems, Regina is glad Henry doesn't have his father's eyes. She loves his hazel ones and at least it weren't a reminder of that man.
"I love your eyes," she offers, relishing in the silence it had settled between them after her answer. It isn't awkward, it is... soothing, just a mother and son enjoying their afternoon together.
"Did you love him?" Henry asks after a while, causing Regina to look down at him, only to see he is still with his head placed on her chest, his eyes facing the ground, so she couldn't quite see his expression.
How is she supposed to tell her son that she had got pregnant with a one-night stand with her former best friend, after both of them had drunk too much in their night out with some of their friends? It wasn't the fairytale Henry was certainly expecting, but she takes a deep breath, shrugs her shoulders and answers, "I cared deeply about him."
And it's true. They were best friends back then and they cared about each other, at least she cared about him. Sometimes she wonders how is he now, does he have a family of his own, a wife, more children... but then she thinks about their following morning and she pushes away all those thoughts, focusing on her own boys, her own family, "But you know what?" she says, urging Henry to sit straight so she could cup his chin and make him look at her, "Now I have two kids and one of them is under Emma's care. I think it's better if we go save your brother, don't you think?"
Henry laughs at that, nodding his head and leaving Regina's embrace to getting up on the horse and make their way back into the stables. They love Emma, but she's not mother material, at least for now.
###
Monday morning, after father's day, as Regina steps into her office, she notices the pile with her new case placed over her desk. She already knows what it is, and she doesn't like it, but she'll have to do it. She knows it is about child custody and right now, she just wants to know who her client is and what are that person's wishes. She always advises for a shared custody, she believes it is, in most cases, the best for the child, but she'll have to know the whole story, so she's already preparing herself for a long day at work, just today that she wanted to pick the boys early from school. She would do her best to accomplish that.
She seats at her desk, placing her coffee in front of her before organizing the paperwork so the only fold in her hands is the one with her new case, and she casts an eye over the papers, immediately understanding that she will be dealing with a father. She just hopes he is a good one, otherwise, it's always hard for her having to fight for the child's custody to stick with someone that doesn't deserve it. She knows she shouldn't mix things, but she always ends up thinking about Henry. She would fight for him if she saw herself in a situation like this.
She focuses her attention back on the task at hand, realizing she had been reading the same sentence over and over again, and this time, she's decided to focus on work, her lips tilting up in a sad smile as she scans the information about the child: boy, four years old, only child (thank god for that, it's even worst when are siblings involved).
Regina flips through the papers back to the beginning, an attempt to keep her curiosity under control, and allows herself to skip the boring information about custody that she'd already read a million times due to other similar cases, and goes straight towards her client's file, her eyes widening when she reads the name impressed on the paper.
Robin Locksley.
She just hopes this is a giant coincidence. It's not him, right? It's not her former best friend, who knocked her up ten years ago... Maybe he had done the same to another woman and she had decided to tell him just to be in this situation now... What if he finds out about Henry? Will he drag her into a situation like this too? No, she can't think about these things right now, she will talk to Sidney and will beg him to change cases with her, will that make her a bad professional?
She's really not concerned about that right now. The only thing in her mind is how she will try to keep her job and fight for this child to stay with this man, while she tries to do the opposite and hide Henry from him at the same time.