Take back the city for yourself tonight

I'll take back the city for me
Take back the city for yourself tonight
Whoa

God knows you put your life into it's hands
And it's both cradled you and crushed
But now it's time to make your own demands
Whoa

All these years later and it's killing me
Your broken records and words
Ten thousand craters where it all should be
Whoa

No need to put your words into my mouth
Don't need convincing at all
I love this place enough to have no doubt
Whoa

It's a mess
It's a start
It's a flawed work of art
Your city, your call
Every crack, every wall
Pick a side, pick a fight
Get your epitaph right
You can sing til you drop
Cause the fun just never stops

I love this city tonight
I love this city always
It bears it's teeth like a light
And spits me out after days
But were all gluttons for it
We know what's wrong and it's right
For every time it's been hit
Take back the city tonight

-Take Back the City

Snow Patrol

"Higher!" He demanded and she smiled. The crisp autumn air teased a dark curl across her forehead and she swiped it from her face.

"Auntie Kate is getting tired." Claire giggled from the swing next to her son.

She wasn't. She could push him all day if it meant hearing his voice. It wasn't often she had the opportunity. Not since she moved out, and left Claire to care for her son on her own.

"And I think it's getting too cold to stay out any longer." Claire stated and Kate grabbed the swing to slow it.

It had been necessary. She'd known all along that one day she would have to back out of their lives. That it would be confusing and hard for Aaron to stop calling her Mommy. To get used to Claire. But she'd known when she went back, that her time with Aaron was coming to a close.

It didn't mean she didn't miss him fiercely at night when her house was empty and the shadows played across her bedroom wall. Silence filling her days and loneliness shrouding her nights.

But he deserved the best, and despite Claire's initial hesitation, she was the best thing for him. It constantly amazed Kate just how resilient Claire was. Some days she didn't even remember there was a time when Aaron's safety in her care may have been questioned.

She took comfort in knowing that no one else could love Aaron more. That if she couldn't be the one tucking him in at night, Claire was.

"Mommy." He whined and Claire huffed and rolled her eyes in a show of affection, causing the little boy to giggle.

"Your mom is right." Kate leaned over the swing and whispered loudly enough for Claire to hear. "Maybe if you're good, she'll let me take you guys out for ice cream."

Aaron hopped down off the swing and ran over to his mother. He put his little hands on her knees and turned that adorable grin up at her.

"Puhlease Mom. I'll be extra good."

Claire chuckled and turned to face Kate.

"You spoil him." Kate smiled and tugged her leather jacket closer as the wind picked up. It was really too cold for ice cream, but she knew that their time was quickly coming to a close and she wanted to extend it if she could.

Claire was kind, letting her come and visit often. She'd been told when she moved out, that their home was always open to her. But Kate knew that even Claire's kindness only went so far and it was hard not to step on her toes at times.

"That's what aunts are for." She smiled and turned the same grin Aaron was using, as he bounced up and down on his heels in impatience, on Claire as well.

"Please." She added for good measure.

It had been two years.

Two years since they'd found their way back to L.A. and off of that island.

Some days it felt like just yesterday. But on days like this one, when watching Aaron with is mother, it felt like a lifetime ago. She didn't want any of these precious moments to pass. Knew all to well how easily they could be taken from her.

"Alright." Claire gave in. Not that she'd really been fighting the idea. Claire had a particular weakness for Rocky Road that Kate wasn't above exploiting.

Aaron jumped up and down, waving his arms.

"Yay! Ice cream! Ice Cream!" He chanted as he ran around the corner of the house on his way to the car. Kate started after him.

"You should bring me back some Rocky Road." Claire said softly as she stood up. Kate turned to face her.

"You aren't coming?" She hated herself for hoping that she might have a moment alone with him. It was wrong. Claire was his mother. She shouldn't hope for the opportunity to pretend. Yet she still did. Still wanted to scoop him up in her arms and hold him close to her chest, rub her nose against his silky hair and breath him in.

"It's been almost a month since you've stopped by." Claire observed and Kate turned her head away, suddenly finding intense interest in a car that drove by.

"I've been busy." She lied easily as she started toward the front of the house again, Claire following. She'd been busy alright. Busy missing them both. Busy pretending to work at her new job to fill the hours. She still had more than enough money from the Oceanic settlement to see her well into retirement. Even after she'd given a large chunk of it to Claire and Aaron. But her new little house was quiet and there was no one to take care of. So she found a miserable job, at a miserable diner, waiting tables like her mother.

She was going to be more. Do more. Not get trapped into an unhealthy relationship.

Well at least she'd done the last.

Somehow though, she wondered if alone was any better.

"It's ok, you know." Claire put a hand on Kate's shoulder to halt her. "You love him. I understand that. You don't have to hide from us."

Oh, but she did. Her whole world shouldn't revolve around a six year old. She needed hobbies, and friends, and once in awhile a date would probably be a good thing too. She couldn't set her life on a shelf because she wanted to play 'Auntie Kate.'

"I know. I'm not. It's just that... It's hard, you know."

It was hard, unbelievably hard. To go through every day knowing that this was the rest of her life. A little boy she could never hold and an emptiness that consumed her.

And somewhere... a man who...

Claire smiled and pulled her in for a hug.

"It's been two years, Sweetie. You should look him up."

Kate smiled.

It was a pastime of theirs. Claire liked to tease her every now and again. Saying that there was a reason both of them made it off that island.

But that's all it ever was. She couldn't look him up, she couldn't ruin his life anymore than she already had. He deserved better. He'd loved Juliet. He needed his space.

That didn't mean a part of her didn't ache for his friendship again though. Or sometimes entertain thoughts of how different their lives could have been.

She wondered sometimes if he were to walk back into her life, if she'd just pick up where they'd left off, or if too much time and space had come between them. Their lives were so different now, so ordinary. Not that wondering mattered. He wasn't going to walk back into her life. They'd parted two years ago with a hug and a brief, "Catch you around." Both of them knowing they wouldn't.

She remembered crying that night. Huddled in the corner of the shower, the warm water pelting her skin as she sobbed for what felt like hours. Remembered wishing that he was there to hold her, he was always the best source of comfort in those kind of situations.

Of all the things she missed about him, it was his arms around her that she still feels on her skin. Its ghost still haunting her with its embrace. Sometimes when she couldn't sleep she would stand by her window, arms wrapped tightly around herself, phone a few feet away. Holding herself back from calling.

Though she didn't have his number, or any real way to contact him, she was still afraid that her desperation to feel something again would somehow result in his voice on the other end of the line.

His soft, 'Freckles,' whispered in her ear. God, she missed that.

"Says the woman who hasn't had a date in how long?" Kate teased back, trying to deflect the conversation. She knew how difficult it was to date as a single mom. But still she hoped Claire could find someone who would treat her right. No one deserved to be alone.

They rounded the corner of the house to be greeted by an impatient Aaron.

"Come on Aunt Kate." He grabbed her hand and tugged impatiently, his little fingers warm and sticky. Always sticky. She missed that.

"Nope. Won't work. I've been meaning to ask you if you have plans tomorrow night. It seems I find myself in need of a sitter."

"Really?" Kate stopped and Aaron let go of her hand and wrapped his arms around her waist, he'd started school this past September and was quickly gaining inches. His father must have been tall, she mused idly.

Claire blushed and nodded her head in the direction of the next house over. Her neighbor, Ian, was a widower with a three year old daughter. His wife had died in childbirth and he'd been dancing around Claire since they'd moved in six months ago. Claire watched his little girl during the day when he was at work.

"Really."

Well good for them. It was about time he made his move. Kate had been debating on whether or not she should give them both a push, for awhile. It was good to see she wouldn't have to. Though she could understand Claire's hesitation at entering the dating pool again, there was nothing more that she wanted for her friend than happiness and she was sure that Ian could give that to her.

Sensing that his guardians were ignoring him. Aaron chose that moment to break back into their conversation.

"Can we puhleease go get Ice Cream now?" He stared up at her with his most pathetic face and Kate tried not to laugh at his imagined tragedy. How dare they make him wait?

"I thought you were going to be extra good?" She teased instead.

"Oh get out of here." Claire shoved Kate's shoulder playfully.

"Yes Ma'am." She retorted, then reached down and scooped up Aaron, throwing him over her shoulder, noting that pretty soon she wasn't going to be able to do that anymore without breaking her back. He shrieked in delight, and she knew she'd keep doing it as long as possible just to hear the delight in his voice, regardless of if it broke her back or not. She jogged the remaining few feet to the car and set him on the ground as she opened the back door and helped him in.

"We'll be back in a little bit." She called over her shoulder then got in the car herself.

"Wave to Mommy." She said as she backed out of the driveway and offered a quick wave to Claire.

"Bye Mom!" Aaron called out from behind her.

Yeah, life was good.