A/N: Ah, starting out I feel like this is a good chapter! :D

Welcome back to Destined to Die, the third installment "Tears of Rejuvenation".

I hate to say that a lot of you will dislike Terra's behavior in the beginning, but she'll be okay by the end, I promise. Not much to say other than I love you all! Flames welcome, MWAHAHA! I'll roast my marshmallows on them and make Final Fantasy S'mores, xD

I apologize for any typos, btw. Working on that still.

-Mayris

"She's not breathing…" Vincent stood. He'd remained stoic until he noted this. In fact, he never stopped monitoring her vitals from the far side of the room. The cessation of her breath was too sudden.

He pressed a hand to her neck. No pulse. Wasting no time, he parted her lips, breathing air into her lungs.

Fingers lay softly over the right side of her chest and below her left breast. Closing his eyes, he focused until enough energy was gathered. Lightning flooded from his fingertips and disappeared into her chest, causing a jolt to physically shake her.

Kuja stayed closed, but listened to Vincent's instruction not to touch her as he sent the lightning through her system.

Her heart started on its own and remained at a slow, steady pace. Vincent hid his relief by briefly checking her other vitals before returning to his place by the door.

Fenn looked down. He couldn't do anything. All he had done was stand by idly while she died for that second. Vincent didn't appear to need aid though and he managed to normalize Terra's vitals. In all the hours of his new life, Fenn hadn't felt this terrible and useless until now.

Deryo didn't look over. He trusted that Vincent knew what he was doing. If he screwed up or was too late to save his sister, he'd rather not see. Rage wasn't a part of his initiation.

As for Kuja, his hands were shaking as they both embraced one of Terra's. For a single moment, her life had flickered away. The illusion that she would simply awaken and everything would begin for them as it should never left his thoughts.

She would wake up… right?

This nightmare would end… wouldn't it?

Terra Evans would laugh and talk. Share her mutual feelings of love and devotion. Allow him to hold and adore her. This wasn't just wishful thinking, wasn't it?

To let her go… was it possible for him to live with that? Move on without turning back toward regret? He had come back from his own tomb to join her in the life she returned to him.

Love another? Impossible.

No other would take her place. Not ever.

~Tears of Rejuvenation~

Dragons danced in a sea of silver streams. Diving from the zenith of limitless reach and then ascending from their nadir into the heavenless skies. A breathtaking sight. With the sun reflecting off their elegant wings, they looked like soaring diamonds.

This ritual was performed over and again. Every morning, just before dawn, they gathered to lift the sun's light upon their shimmering, scaly backs until it blazed in the horizon to the west. An odd sunrise. Like the world was flipped upside-down to allow such phenomena.

The sun was a gentle, green glaze that feathered through the ever-present clouds. Delicate streams bled through until the pure sunlight touched the pale fields of blue grass. The sky was always a gray-blue, if visible beyond the sheets of sky mist.

No threats. No wars. No power-hungry warlords preparing a bloodbath massacre.

There was order. Laws. Everything was comfortably governed by a higher, unseen power. Normality was achieved, but only to an extent.

As a black cloud grows from the center of my focus and engulfs everything with thick smoke and tiny peaks of fire, I grip my staff in horror and anticipation.

Another fight. I stand at the ready to face the same battle again. I lost count of how many times we fought, but the outcome depends on my will.

Today, I'm not strong enough. I have no motivation. For almost a week, I've allowed defeat to sweep over again and again. Each time, losing hurts a little more and I feel weaker from its reward.

Mateus's staff cut through mine, shattering it into hundreds of pieces. My palms and arms took the excess force of its breakage.

I stared blankly at the steel tip of a blade. His staff finished morphing and became the solid hilt of the blade.

The battle ended. I lost.

"Return to me," he commanded.

"I'm not yours," I glared.

He's not happy. Of course not. But one day, I hope he tires of these battles. It has been three weeks since these dreams started. I can only hope again and again that they end.

A ray of light pierces the smoke. The barrier started to fall apart around us.

Mateus turned to me with a growl. "Arbitrator!" A spell spiraled in my direction. Too late to block, its velocity tore into my arm.

"Thanks for the gift," I yelled, forcing myself to wake from the dream.

The world vanished a little more with each blink of my eyes. A cold sweat caked my body and a sharp pain gripped my arm.

Running my hand along the fresh cut, I sighed. Blood. Mother will not be pleased with the mess on the sheets. And if that wasn't bad, she'd be even more hysteric that I managed to get hurt in sleep. I couldn't very well tell her, could I?

I sat up, catching a faint line of light through my curtains. It was noon. She let me sleep in again.

Stretching, I winced, trying to ignore the pain as my arm tugged at the new opening of tissue. With a bit of time on my hands, I decided to hide the mess and made my bed.

I pulled on a long-sleeved shirt after washing up, dressing warm. It was the chilly spring months. I planned to map out more of this new world.

With my journals and hiking supplies packed, I left the room and was bombarded with the smell of pastries from the kitchen. I still hadn't gotten over the new aroma that accompanied its foreign taste.

Raylene rolled a new batch of dough over a cutting board and paused when I entered the room, leaving the metal rolling pin atop the mass. "Morning, Terra," she beamed.

"Hey…" I mumbled, going through the kitchen and making up a few sandwiches before packing them in my backpack.

"Are you heading out again?"

"Mhm." Food packed, check. Now to bolt. I made a beeline for the door.

"Do you have your locator spheres?"

"Yup."

"What about your compass?"

"Always."

She wrung her hands nervously. "Avoid the mines. They're dangerous and you could get lost."

"I know," I called out, slightly irritated. The lock finally gave and I pushed open the door.

"Vesper is in the sand fields. He wanted to give you something. Go see him."

Father? What did he have that would be of use? I exited without an answer. More intrigued with her last bit of news which was far more interesting than the same humdrum questions she always felt inclined to ask before I escaped her presence.

Not losing any time, I headed west. The sand fields were father's current study. He wanted to find a way to convert sand into crystals which might be used to conduct energy. I didn't know how chemistry worked here, so I didn't categorize him as mad… yet. He did seem to have his head up in the clouds now and then.

Thinking back, he was usually like this. But with feats that were actually possible. Like shaping weapons that would flow quicker against wind resistance. Or syntheses that would convert more stable elements into them with no chance of harming the wielder.

An array of gadgets littered the patch of yellow. I paused at the edge of grass, looking over to him.

"You wanted to see me." He was crouched beside a machine that highly resembled a spider.

Standing quickly, he bustled over with his arms full. I raised an eyebrow as he shifted the items from arm to arm until he held a book before me. "This."

I leafed through it. All the words were arranged in odd sentences, leaving incomprehensible gaps between the words and the illustrations. It was a book of garble. Thanks, dad. "What is it?"

He glanced toward the house and licked his lips. "Important."

"Sorry?"

"Read it."

Opening to a random page, I read aloud, "Soul's zenith starting over transcends the path beyond which takes without giving." I sighed. "What's it mean?"

He gave me a pleading stare.

"Can't you just tell me? I said I hate riddles over a week ago," I grumbled.

"You sound just like Ember…" He sighed, placing a hand on his head.

"I know…"

"Why won't you tell me what happened? How did you…?"

Noting his struggle, I finished for him, "Die? That's easy. I stopped living."

"You don't have to be a smart-ass." He glared which both scared and silenced my wit.

"It's not something I want to talk about. Now what's this book for?"

Reluctantly, he told me. "A puzzle."

I could have thrown it at him. "Really?" Venom coated my voice.

"The meaning of the words will come to you. Just let it in."

Easier said than done. Manipulation taught me better. "What is it for?"

"Someone gave it to me. They told me to give it to you when or if you showed up in this world. Using that book, they want you to find them," he explained.

"Why?" Could it be a trap? What if Mateus had come here and this book was his challenge? Would he count my seeking of him as surrender? I glared at the book. "You need to tell me who gave this to you."

He shook his head. "I can only do so much."

I glared up at him. "Father, you must tell me. I don't' want to be caught off guard."

"I'm sorry, Terra."

"Fine. Then if I turn up missing, it's your fault," I spat.

"Why are you always so paranoid?"

"Why aren't you?" I turned away, clutching the book. "You and mother were murdered on Gaia. Why are you so carefree?"

A hand landed on my shoulder. "Why are you so bitter?" He pulled me back into a hug. "Fear is continuously biting at your heels. Why won't you say anything?"

Because there's no way you would ever understand, I thought. When I arrived here, I awoke so hopeful only to find I was in a different world. I still had much to do on Gaia. I wanted to live normally and raise a family. Fate took away my control. I never achieved peace. Even now, I feel I don't belong. This world is foreign and my heart won't stop aching for the reality I know. Every night I have nightmares about Mateus and I yearn so much for my beloved that I want to scream.

Of course I'm bitter.

But he couldn't know that. Not ever.

"Maybe the one who gave me that book can help you," he suggested.

"Yeah…" I started on my way, pulling from his reach.

It wasn't right to act so aloof with my parents. But I couldn't stifle this anger.

I walked until sundown. By then, I reached the cliffs that hung over the water's edge. The ocean lay out before me in its sickly green waves. My palms were scraped and bleeding from the climb.

Wind whipped about my face, sending my long, black hair in a messy flurry. Gazing over to another cliff, I gasped.

One of the black mages who resided here toppled over the edge, plunging into the violent waters! Why had he done that? He was alone too. Why? The death to fear in this place was soul destruction. Did he really want it all to end?

Did I want it all to end?

"You don't even know why you're here and you're already entertaining the thoughts of suicide," a man laughed behind me.

Before I could turn, a hand gripped my injured arm and pulled me up. I stood unbalanced on the rock. "Hey! Ow! Let go!" I flailed, trying to regain my balance.

The man looked up and raised an eyebrow. Shoulder-length blond hair fell in waves around his face. Green eyes pierced mine for a moment before he laughed again.

"Nice to see you again too!"

He pulled me up onto the even ground. Silver armor clamped around his muscular build. Its sheen luminosity nearly blinded my eyes even in the dark. "What are you talking about?" I raised my hand to block the sudden light.

He crossed his arms. "I feel insulted now. You don't even remember." With his eyes closed, he smirked. White wings appeared on his back.

I raised an eyebrow. "Nice trick." Sighing, I massaged my temples. "Sorry, there's a lot going on."

"Being the Arbitrator wasn't supposed to be fun…"

Fear leapt in my chest. I covered his mouth, pressing him against a rock and looking around. "Don't say that word aloud!" I hissed.

He cocked his head to the side, confused. I slowly pulled my hand away. "I hope you're better when you wake up."

"Huh? But I am awake."

"Nope. You're fast asleep."

"What are you talking about?"

He lifted up the book my father had given me. "Find the man this belongs to."

"Hey! Don't just take things from me!" I reached out to swipe it from him which caused him to lift it out of reach above my head.

"Why not? We are friends, aren't we?"

I growled. "I don't know who you are! Your antics are annoying."

He sighed. "Shall I act more serious then?" Stepping back, he drew a thick, crystalline blade. His warm, green gaze sharpened and his stance changed to a threatening lunge. His glare sent shivers through my back.

Drawing upon instinct, I grabbed for my staff. "You picked a bad day to mess with me."

"No," he started. The benign tone was replaced with a sharp iciness. "You need to quell your fury."

I ran forward, letting out a harsh battle cry. Bringing up my weapon, I was poised to smack the end of it across his face. Ready, I drew back and slashed out.

Before the hit could connect, he jumped out of the way and flew into the sky. His wings grew and carried him high above the ground.

A castle formed around him. Fragments of the dreams flickered back to me. That cold night. The crystal. And the warriors.

His name rushed to me like plasma in a storm. Ocean waves crashed behind me as spears of light shot toward me from behind the castle.

I screamed as they connected, sapping my energy until I collapsed. Wind swept the castle away, leaving Alexander rushing toward me.

"Convinced?" he asked apologetically.

"How…?" I asked, looking up at him.

He smiled. "Have you changed your mind then?"

I nodded. "I'll… give it a shot."

"And you won't behave so rudely?"

Nodding again, I said, "Yeah… I'm sorry…"

"Aye. That's good." He extended his hand to me. "Let's go see Ifrit. Shiva will want to meet up too."

"Eidolons?"

"Aye."

"Do they… always attack like this?"

He thought about it. "No. I just needed to knock some sense into ya."

"I thought all those visions were dreams…"

We started toward a large crest of rock where a cavern began. The sun had gone down when we started off.

"Time and place are strange phenomena, Terra." He started up the crest, reaching his hand out to assist my own ascension. "Like now, you're here. But you're still there."

"There?"

"Gaia. Back then, when we first met, well, when you were awake, your body had gone through something exhausting. You'd fallen into a deep sleep. Comatose, if you will. This is much the same. Just a different place. Back then, your consciousness had been transported into the past and you were back on Gaia."

"But… I was the Arbitrator before I woke up on Esthar, right?"

"Not really. You were… let's say… bequeathed as the Arbitrator when you hit celestial puberty."

"Why?"

"Cosmos had Terras come before you, of course. When they were born as goddesses, terrible things happened to them." Like terrible things hadn't happened to me. "The mother always died when giving birth. The subject's power was so concentrated that they… sucked the life out of their host."

"Oh…" I shuddered.

"Without nurturing parents, the goddess suffered greatly and lost the will to live at the final stage of their destiny. As is their nature, all of them ultimately blamed themselves for the loss of their mother. So much that they gave up on living."

"Why?"

"The heart of the woman selected is often empathetic or develops empathetic attributes as they journey through life. They weep when others weep. It is an emotional trial, really. I'm sure you know of the burden."

"Yeah…" I thought of Kraizule and Ultimecia.

"Cosmos decided she would try a different method. Instead of sanctioning the child at once, she would leave gaps in their souls to be prepared for the power which was to be used."

"Gaps?"

"Aye."

"Are they… harmful?"

"A little. But not life threatening. Fainting. Clumsiness. Impulsive actions. And, in some cases, memory loss and manipulation."

I felt like I'd been struck on the head. Coming over the crest, he held his hand out to assist my way down. I stayed at the top.

"Memory loss… manipulation?"

"Aye." He nodded.

How could he act so nonchalant? The worry must have been apparent on my face.

"Terra, memory loss and manipulation are normal. Humans experience it all the time in minor cases."

"How minor?"

He sighed. "They misplace things. Recognize a familiar face and realize that person isn't who they thought they were."

"Like when I forgot my mother's eye color?" I had mistaken Julian's eyes for being the same as my own mother's. He was in no way related to her. He had Aulin's eye color. The woman that came before Raylene. The woman whose nurturing spirit I had never met.

Alexander sighed. "Aye. Something like that."

Weight fell into my stomach, pulling me down and air choked my throat. "I've been cheated…" Even my clumsiness had been a real curse. I could have lived without that.

He shook his head. "You survived."

"I don't care!" A tear dripped onto the white rock beside my hand.

"Terra…" he called softly. Climbing back up, he sat next to me. His arm draped around my shoulders. I jumped. This comfort was foreign. Everyone always tried to stop my tears. Except Vincent. But he hardly interfered. Alexander pulled me to rest against his plated chest. "I know it hurts. When I found out that the best way to protect my kingdom was to become an Eidolon, I was terrified. I had a home. Someone I loved. I had to leave her behind. But… that was alright. When I became a stronghold, I could still hold her in my arms. And when she fell in love with another… I… was delighted. She found happiness. And she raised a wonderful family."

"But… you attacked everyone. How did you turn so angry?"

He sighed, looking to the sky. "The Summoners were experimental. They were trying to amplify my power as a complete defense system. But they were attacked all too soon. As a last resort, I was called into battle. But… even after the enemy was obliterated, I couldn't stop. And then… four warriors came to my rescue. They found the crystal that was the cause for my rage and broke it into four pieces, scattering it across the lands. Without the crystal, I was forced into sleep. Until I was reawakened, Alexandria fought her own wars."

"I see. I'm glad you were saved."

"You… I remember seeing you. You calmed me. The excess power I had was taken. The Arbitrator's power. You allowed the warriors to stop the devastation. I am grateful. Without you, I would have wiped them all out. I guess I returned the favor today."

I was at peace. Unknowingly, I'd done something useful. Alexander was probably the only one here that could bring me to this understanding. I couldn't help but smile.

"There! You're feeling better already!"

I rolled my eyes. "Can you tell me what an Arbitrator is?"

"Heheh… I could… but you'd enjoy hearing it from someone else. It's more fun to figure out things on your own then have someone tell you, aye?"

I sighed. Obviously, he would not be giving me an answer anytime soon.

We entered the cavern. Skeptical of its inhabitants, I stayed close to Alexander who led the way confidently.

On the way, I divulged my life's story. From ten years with my brothers up to the first day I woke up here. It wasn't pleasant.

I woke up in a forest with numerous red trees that raised high above the ground. The barren floor invited a strange balance between life and death I was eager to escape. From there, I just started walking, following the setting sun which was oddly to the east, I realized later. Ten minutes later, I was attacked by a wild beast. My strength wasn't enough to stop it. Everything I threw at it merely broke or bounced off.

I was saved by a man wearing a red mask with a steel spear. My father. I nearly had a coronary when he pulled the mask off.

He walked me to the cabin where he and mother lived. Along the way, he asked question after question. Vesper was never good with people. So my silence may have insulted him. But I didn't know what to say. To wake up here was terrifying. To meet my dead father was worse. I cried. But I did so in secret. He stopped pestering me for answers.

Mother grew protective of me the first two minutes after reassuring it was really me. I had to make excuses just to leave the house. Mapping the area satisfied her.

"You're life's complicated, lass," Alexander noted, moving a path of rocks with the swing of an arm.

"Where are we going?" I could barely see. The only light came from his armor.

"Ifrit often stays here. He's not subjective to trickery. Though, he appears scary and likes to put on an aloof façade, he's actually a big softie."

I had heard horror stories about the evil djinn. Julian used to recall stories of villages perishing under his wrath. "You sure it's a good idea to bother him?"

"Never said it was a good idea." He laughed.

Oh, thanks, Alexander. I rolled my eyes.

"The worst that can happen is for him to find us before we find him and then decide to test you."

I didn't want to be tested. I wanted to go home.

As we rounded a turn, the light disappeared. "Oh, no…" I said aloud. Alexander was gone. Great timing.

I ventured forward, searching the wall blindly. "Alexander?" I called, uncertain. Where had he gone? Great, this was probably the test he was just talking about.

Swallowing, I called out, "Ifrit…? Are you there?"

A growling laugh echoed around the room.

I pressed my back against the wall I knew was solid and looked about in the darkness and stilled my breath. If he tried to kill me, I could make my escape back out the way I came.

"I thought it was that red-eyed madman who had got lost on his way again. But this is even more of a delight. The Arbitrator." The voice growled again. Hunger. I could sense the bloodlust even from his unknown vantage point.

"Where is Alexander?" I asked, glaring down the darkness.

A roar emitted from before me. Hot breath bathed my face and I turned away, closing my eyes and readying for the lethal blow of a heavy claw. My hands gripped the uneven rocks behind me. Though I had better hope of going limp and allowing my body to move with whatever crushing blow came at me, I chanced broken wrists to still my fear.

Wind picked up and swirled around the air before a soft thud met the floor solidly. A tearing sound ripped through the air before the crackling of a warm fire reached my senses.

Cracking one eye open, I saw a shirtless man with light brown hair and a toned chest holding a red flame in his hand. "Well, hello there, Evans-kin."

I narrowed my eyes and struggled to return the hello.

Before I could answer, he continued, his brown eyes beaming. "Did you get lost along your way?"

"Where is Alexander? He led me here. I know who you are, Ifrit. You can't fool me with this humanistic façade."

He chuckled lightly. "Did you forget? I was human once too, little one." One of his large hands landed on my head as he ruffled my hair. "What an adorable little girl, you are."

I struggled to push his hand from my head. "I'm not little! I'm an adult you know, not a child."

"Oh?" Confusion crossed his face. "You still look like a little kid. And you smell of youth. At least you smell better than your patriarch."

"Vesper? What do you mean?"

He laughed. "The man reeks of blood! He's killed many in his lifetime."

"What…?" My father? A murderer? There was little I understood about things. Questions arose in my mind, unhinged by my imagination. But why should I believe this strange man I'd just met?

As if to answer that question, Ifrit smirked and brought a hand under my chin, moving to my ear to whisper. "Because he helped in the eradication of the Summoner's tribe. We've crossed paths. I would never forget his scent. And you smell just like him, my dear."