"Hey, what am I doin' here! Why is the only thing i remember being slugged by a 20-ton baseball bat? And what's with the squirrels?" shouted a dark brown tabby tom.

"Cause I say so, or do you want me to open the closet?" snapped a snow-white kittypet.

"Hello!" he shouted to the camera. "And welcome to Warriors Bachelorette! My name is Mittens, your freakishly good-lookin' host!"

"Not so good-lookin' to me," the voice of Brambleclaw called from the closet.

"You shut up!" yelled Mittens.

"UGLY! UGLY! UGLY!" shouted Spiderleg.

"Shut up!" yelled Mittens, now holding a freakishly heavy baseball bat.

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"MEW!" yelled a fat kit from the audience. "I want pie! Give me pie or I'll call you all the names my mommy tells me not to say."

"Why should I give pie to an overly fat kit? The answers no, fatty!"

"You're a meow!" shouted the fat kit.

"Hey, what's that in my pants?" called a voice in the closet. "It's crawling all around me! Help!"

"Oh, those are just my paws trying to look for some cookies," called another voice in the closet.

"That's it, we're getting too off track! Anyway, my name is-"

"WE KNOW! MITTENS, YOU MEOW!" yelled the audience.

"Yo, stop putting your paws in my pants!" called a voice from the closet.

"Anyway, we're here for the Warriors Bachelorette season premeire, featuring Squirrelflight as the Bachelorette!"

Squirrelflight walks out of the closet, dressed in a tutu. She takes a big puff of air, and then turns to the camera. "It's stuffy in there!"

Mittens sighs, and then continues. "and Thornclaw, Spiderleg, Shrewpaw, Foxleap, Bumblestripe, Toadstep, Brambleclaw, and Hawkfrost as the contestants! With special guests stars, Leopardstar, Firestar, Leafstar, Tallstar, Onestar, Mistystar, and Bluestar! We really aim for the stars in this show!"

The closet opens, and out come the contestants, with a wary Hawkfrost, and Shrewpaw eating cookies.

"I'm not going to ask," said Mittens. "Well, anyways, R&R the first episode, and vote for your favorite contestant, the one you want to stay and become Squirrelflight's lover, because whoever gets the least votes is getting kicked off! Good night, and Drive Safely!"

Not to shabby, huh? Well, tell me what you think about it, and vote for your favorite character on the show. The contestants are (In no presise order)

1. Thornclaw

2. Spiderleg

3. Shrewpaw

4. Foxleap

5. Bumblestripe

6. Toadstep

7. Brambleclaw

8. Hawkfrost

R&R and Vote for your favorite contestant!