I do not own Sailor Moon.
What You Mean To Me
Raye looked up from her history textbook to ensure Serena was still doing her own studying. She wasn't surprised to see the blonde stuffing her face with the cookies she had brought out for their little study session. The rebuke boiled on her tongue, but she paused when she spotted Serena's free hand drift down and stroke a slumbering Luna's head.
Serena peeked up to see Raye staring at her and she hastily swallowed her mouthful of chocolate chip cookies. "I'm studying!" she rasped as the crumbs got stuck in her throat. "I was just taking a break!"
"You can't call it a break when you haven't even started studying," returned Raye. When Serena started to turn red with indignation, Raye cut off the impending temper tantrum by remarking, "You know, I've always thought you were pretty lucky."
The hot air immediately left Serena, her mouth twisting in confusion. "What are you talking about?"
Raye swung her pencil to gesture towards the cat sleeping in Serena's lap, her hand still resting lightly on top of her head. "You and Luna. You guys are close. Like, super close. I can see it when you interact with each other. It must be nice."
"You have to know how it feels," said Serena in bewilderment. "We all have a bond. I mean, we're close. Aren't we?"
"I can't believe you even have to ask." Giving her head a slight shake, Raye said, "The bond you share with Luna is different than the one I share with you, or the one we girls share. It's…deeper. I mean, you're all my best friends and I love you. But what you and Luna have…and Mina and Artemis too…I don't know how to explain it. I can just see it when I look at you. Like now."
Serena glanced down at the black cat curled up against her stomach and suddenly she was hyperaware of the warmth and affection bubbling within her, of the automatic, soothing pattern her fingers wove through Luna's fur. What she felt for Luna was significantly different from what she felt for her best friends.
"I…I never really thought about it," she finally said.
Raye smiled. "Well, you wouldn't. It's just a natural feeling for you. Now come on, stop wasting my time and get back to studying. You asked me to tutor you so that's what we're going to do."
Scowling, Serena snapped, "Wait a minute, you're the one who brought this up! Don't blame me!"
"It's not like I was distracting you from being productive. I don't think you even know what that word means."
"I do too! It means…doing stuff."
"Ooh, very articulate."
"Shut up, Raye!"
…
As the sun began its gentle descent, blanketing the world below with a soft orange and red glow, Serena and Luna made the journey home. Paws padding against the cement, Luna glanced up at Serena, who was staring blankly ahead. She hadn't said a word since they left Raye's home and that was always an indicator that something was troubling her.
"All right, out with it," said Luna firmly. "What's wrong?"
Serena's head jerked, eyes blinking rapidly as she was ripped from her intense pondering and back to reality. "Oh! Nothing," she said quickly, smiling to prove she wasn't lying. "Just thinking."
"About?"
"Nothing in particular."
Now that was a lie and Luna didn't miss it. "You can't be deep in thought over nothing," she scoffed.
"Why not? I am a space-case," said Serena. "I can think about nothing, you know."
"Trust me, I know you can. But you have a different expression when you're spacing out," said Luna matter-of-factly.
"Really?"
"Yes. Your eyes are glassy. Unfocussed. But when you're thinking very seriously about something, you stare off at an invisible fixed point. It's focussed."
In any other instance, Serena wouldn't have paid much attention to this observance. But with Raye's words stilling rattling through her brain, she could see how Luna knew the little nuances of her expressions. How she knew when something was bothering her, when something was wrong, or when she was hiding something. Just how Serena could tell when Luna was upset but trying to mask it, or when she was troubled by something.
"Serena." Luna had hopped onto the top of a cement wall, so that she and her charge were eye-level. Scanning her features for some hint of what was occurring in her head, Luna asked seriously, "What are you thinking about?"
"Nothing. I promise." Serena extended her arms and Luna willingly jumped into them. "It's just something that Raye said."
"You know Raye, she likes to tease you. If she hurt your feelings, I'm sure she didn't mean too."
"Oh, it's nothing like that."
Exasperation building up within her, Luna exclaimed, "Then what's got you so preoccupied? What did Raye say?"
"Don't worry about it. Don't you listen? I said it was nothing."
Luna scoffed. "That seems to be the word of the day. And don't you try to talk to me about listening."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means you're a hypocrite. Because if you bothered listening to me at all, you would have studied for your history test and wouldn't have failed it. Now you have to do extra work in order to make up for it and you're bothering poor Raye."
"Hey! She offered to help! And if anyone is bothering anyone, she usually bothers me!"
"Ouch! Stop digging your nails into me!"
"Ouch! I will when you stopping digging your claws into my arm!"
Serena promptly let go, leaving Luna to hastily twist in to the air to land on her feet. Luna glowered up at the girl, who grinned down at her. "You are insufferable."
"Now who's the hypocrite?" challenged Serena.
"Certainly not me."
"We'll see about that. Last one home is a hypocrite!"
Serena took off running, her shoes slapping against the pavement and the wind sending her long pigtails streaming behind her. It wasn't long before Luna took up pursuit and the black cat made it home several minutes before Serena. Her burst of energy now extinguished, she stumbled through the front door, huffing and puffing.
There was a lot of whining that the race was unfair, since Luna had four legs, but Serena grudgingly admitted that yes, she was a hypocrite. Smug by her victory, Luna followed Serena into the bathroom, where she stretched out across the tiles of the floor as Serena settled in the warm bath water.
"Yes?" called Serena when a knock sounded on the door a little while later.
"I just pulled some fresh towels from the dryer," her mother answered. "Would you like one?"
"Ooh, yes please!"
Ikuko nudged open the door and stepped inside, a pile of fluffy white towels in her grasp. When she removed one from her pile, Serena said, "Can I have one for Luna too?"
Though bemused by this request, Ikuko set a second towel near the cat, who immediately curled up in the warm fabric with a delighted purr. "Does Luna always come in here with you when you have a bath?"
"No, just sometimes."
"Well, I think it's sweet."
Ikuko left and Serena finished washing up. She dried herself off and slipped on her pajamas. She returned to her bedroom, where she clicked off the lights and snuggled beneath her covers. Luna sprawled out next to her and despite her cat nap a few hours earlier, she fell asleep quickly. In the darkness of her room, Serena could make out the outline of Luna's body, her back rising and falling with every breath, the crescent moon mark on her forehead bright amongst the shadows.
…
"What did you want to talk about, Serena?"
Pumping her legs so she could get some height, Serena glanced over at Mina, who sat on the swing beside her eating an ice-cream cone. "How do you feel about Artemis?"
Not the question she was prepared for, Mina fumbled for an answer. "Oh. Well, I love him, obviously. He means everything to me and…um…"
When she trailed off, Serena said knowingly, "There are no words strong enough to suit what you feel."
"Yeah, I guess not," said Mina in surprise. "What brought all this on?"
"It's something Raye said to me yesterday, when she was helping me study for history. She said she'd never seen a bond like the one you and I share with Artemis and Luna. She said she could see it when she looked at us. And I just kept thinking about it. Then I started to feel like…"
"You don't deserve it."
Digging her heels into the dirt so she came to a complete halt, Serena gripped the ropes of the swing and stared at Mina with wide eyes. "Since when can you read minds?"
"I can't," said Mina with a laugh. "But I know what you mean. Sometimes I feel like Artemis would be better off if I wasn't Sailor Venus. If I was someone who wasn't so stubborn and actually listened to him."
"Yeah," said Serena softly, staring at the ground. "I love Luna, but I realize that it's a bond I take advantage of. I never really tell her how much I appreciate her or what she means to me. I always argue with her and whine and act bratty. Raye says our bond is special, and she's right, but sometimes I wonder if Luna would be happier if someone more responsible and respectful was destined to be Sailor Moon. I don't know what I am to her, if I'm just the person she got stuck with."
Before Mina could protest what she believed to be a ridiculous concept, something solid struck the back of her head, the force sending her face smashing into the remainder of her ice-cream. "Eek!"
Serena yelped in surprise as Artemis landed neatly on the grass near Mina's feet. "What the heck?" she cried, for the white cat had very literally dropped down from the sky. She tilted her chin upwards and her body froze at the sight of Luna standing directly above her, perched on a long, arching tree branch.
"You did that on purpose!" accused Mina, her nose and bottom half of her face covered in the rapidly-melting dairy dessert.
"You were both talking utter nonsense. I had to do something to stop you," returned Artemis.
Mina glared at him, cheeks flushing red with both embarrassment and anger. "This was a private conversation! You can't just eavesdrop on people."
"That's pretty rich coming from you." Giving his head a slight jerk, he added, "Come on."
"Is this the part where we have to have a talk?" asked Mina suspiciously.
"You bet."
"Thought so. See you later, Serena."
Serena waved after Mina as she and Artemis started down the park path. She jumped when Luna landed in front of her, a serious set to her features. "Um…exactly how long were you there?" Serena asked nervously.
"Long enough," answered Luna. "Do you really believe the things you said?"
"Depends on the things you're referring to," said Serena. When Luna growled warningly at her, Serena muttered, "Okay, okay. Yes. Sometimes."
"How can you possibly think all you are to me is, as you so eloquently put it, 'someone I got stuck with?'" demanded Luna.
"I'm not the person you would have chosen to be Sailor Moon, admit it!" challenged Serena. "You're always saying I'm lazy, selfish and childish."
"It was never my choice to being with," said Luna sharply. "It was destiny."
"Don't you ever wish destiny had picked someone else, then?"
"In the beginning, yes. I did." When Serena's face fell, Luna hopped into her lap, lightly resting a paw on her arm. "But I realized that my impatience and expectations were hindering me from training you properly. You weren't Queen Serenity. You weren't Princess Serenity—at least not in the way I once knew her. You are your own person, with a different personality but with the same beliefs and morals that made the princess a gracious leader."
"You really think I can be a gracious leader?"
"You are a gracious leader. Well, most of the time." Serena pouted at her and Luna rubbed her cheek against Serena's neck. "I wouldn't be happier if someone else bore the mantle of Sailor Moon. And if you insist on believing I'm merely stuck with you, then I'm afraid you are stuck with me. I'm not going anywhere. I love you."
"Oh, Luna." Serena hugged her companion tightly, tears gathering in her eyes. "I love you too."
"Another ridiculous thing I must address. You don't take advantage of our bond. You don't need to tell me you appreciate me. I know how you feel, just as you know how I feel, when your doubts aren't clouding your judgement."
"I'll try to work on that," said Serena sheepishly. "I'm probably not gonna stop arguing with you, though."
"Good. It would be very boring if you didn't. It's my favourite pastime, getting you so flustered and furious you can't speak."
"I don't know, I think I probably have more fun trying to tick you off and seeing how much I can make your fur stand up with agitation," teased Serena.
"Oh you." Luna batted the girl's nose playfully. "Let's go home."
Serena stood up, the swing hitting the back of her legs from the momentum. She started the walk for home, her fingers smoothing through Luna's fur. "How'd you and Artemis find us, anyway?"
"We just knew where you'd be," said Luna simply. "You left the house without a word, and in addition to your odd behaviour yesterday, I was worried. I ran into Artemis on the way to the park and he said Mina was gone before he woke up and he was searching for her. It's a good thing we found you when we did. Who knows how long you'd be fretting?"
"It's kinda creepy how you can just be there without me knowing."
"It's a useful skill. Helps me to keep an eye on you, even when you may not particularly want it." Giving Serena's chin an affectionate lick, she said, "You know you can talk to me about anything?"
"I know. I should have talked to you right away. Sorry for all the fuss. You know, this is really Raye's fault. She shouldn't have said anything."
"She paid you a compliment. You shouldn't have let your mind run away from you," chided Luna. "For such a space-case, you really do overthink things."
With a mischievous smirk, Serena let her arms fall limp to her sides, leaving Luna to tumble to the ground. Luna managed to land on her paws and she cried, "Serena!"
"What? I'm helping you with your landings. You have a hundred percent success rate so far."
"I'm surprised you know that number, considering you've seen it on your school work."
Mouth falling open in shock, Serena shrieked, "That's really low! That's Raye-level low!" She lunged for Luna, who dodged the girl's arms and raced off. Serena raced after her, half-shouting and half-laughing. "I'm so gonna get you for that!"
"Then I suppose it's time to work on your athleticism," called Luna cheekily.
As the pair raced through the park and then through town, Serena couldn't suppress her wide grin or the giddiness that swelled within her. There were a lot of hardships that came with being Sailor Moon, but there were far more rewards.
And the greatest one of all was Luna, and the priceless bond they had forged with each other.
