On Scarlet's Walk
by heyjupiter/Renata of Doom (renata@frowl.org) 7/6/03
Summary: Jean's just the latest in the series of redheads in Logan's life...
PG
Movieverse, (very) pre-X1
Archive: Sure, just let me know. renata@frowl.org
Notes: 4th in my series of X-Men movieverse fics based on Tori Amos' album Scarlet's Walk; the first three being "Withered", "Strange", and "Skipping School". (Each stands alone, they're only connected by using songs from the same album.) Many thanks to Priscilla for beta-ing and keeping me from wandering too far out of character! ^_^
(Lyrics are "Scarlet's Walk" by Tori Amos.)


Freud was the first modern psychologist to suggest that every personality has a large unconscious component. Life includes both pleasurable and painful experiences. [...] Freud believed that many of our experiences, particularly the painful episodes of childhood, are forgotten or buried in the unconscious. But although we may not consciously recall these experiences, they continue to influence our behavior.

-- Richard A. Kasschau, Ph.D., Understanding Psychology

He wiped the dust out of his eyes and glared at the sign. "Drifters Keep Moving! No Jobs Here!" There were no jobs anywhere, it seemed, not since the stock market went to hell last year. Logan was strong and good at manual labor; he'd never before had trouble finding work. He climbed back into his battered truck and continued his journey west. He had only gone a few miles past the small town when a flash of red, resplendent against the dusty Oklahoman landscape, caught his eye. Closer inspection revealed it to be attached to the head of a beautiful girl. He stopped the truck.
"Climb in," he said gruffly. She nodded her thanks as she did so. "Where ya headed?"
"Anywhere but here," she replied.
"Whatta coincidence, me too." A pause. "Not to meddle or nothin', but I gotta ask... what's a pretty little thing like you doing out here all on your lonesome?"
"After my mother died, my father forced me to leave. He did not like my presence, a constant reminder of my mother's impurity." The Indian girl gestured at her deep red hair.
"Ah." He nodded. "So yer mum--"
"My mother was forced into unfaithfulness by a white man. A soldier. Bad enough that they force us off our land and onto the squalid reservations, bad enough that the dishonest agents rob us of food and aid that is rightly ours, but they must also take our women." She glared at him fiercely.
"I'm real sorry to hear that."
"I don't want your pity. I merely have stated facts for you."

Logan smirked. Here, he thought, was a girl after his own heart.
"Gotta name?"
"You may call me Scarlet."
"Scarlet? What kinda name is that?"
"The kind you may call me," came her arch reply."
"I'm Logan."

leaving terra
leaving terra
If you're a thought
you will want me
to think you
and I did

They drove on, further and further on Route 66, passing countless "No Jobs" signs.

Logan broke the long silence by saying, "Y'know, a pretty girl like you... well, I bet you could make a pretty good living in a city like Chicago..." He was silenced by her glare.
"You white men have robbed us of nearly everything, but we still have our dignity."
"Well hey darlin', I'm sorry about your people and all, but it's not my fault. I'm just one white man, not the entire white race."
"You're all the same."
"Look, did you want to ride with me or not?"
Holding herself ramrod straight in the bumpy truck, Scarlet said, "I do not want to ride with you. However, I am nonetheless grateful for your assistance." Her face softened a bit. "Forgive me if I have seemed to you fierce like the cougar. I am only trying to keep myself honorable among dishonorable people."
Raising an eyebrow, he said, "Well, far as I'm concerned, your honor's safe with me... but you're lucky I came along when I did, lots a guys in my position might not have felt the same."
"Perhaps," she said. "But I am not without my own defenses." He looked at her. She half-smiled and tapped a large knife that hung from her belt.
Half impressed, half amused, Logan just said, "Let's just hope you never have to use it."

invite a Guest
up until you announced
that
you had moved in
"what do you plan to do
with all your freedom?"
the new sheriff said,
quite proud of his badge
"You must admit the land is now
in good hands"
yes, time will tell that
you just lift your lamp

They drove on together, stopping in every town along the way to search for work. They would spend each night in a different squatters camp before rising early the next morning to continue their fruitless journey. As the days went by, Logan and Scarlet began to gain a grudging respect for one another. Both were too proud to wait in the lines for soup kitchens. Logan kept an old rifle in the back of the truck and could always find whatever game there was and Scarlet had a good eye for edible roots and plants that others would have looked over. To pass the time on the lonely highway, they began to tell each other stories. In spite of herself, Scarlet often found herself amused by Logan's exaggerated tales.

"... and they're still talking about the time I talked that bear into giving us that honeycomb in exchange for giving him his claws back," he finished. "Your turn!"
"All right... now I will tell you the story of why the mole must live underground. For you see, long, long ago he did not spend his life below the ground, but above it, with the other animals. And during this time, there was a young man who loved a young woman very much. He tried very hard to win her love in return, but she despised him and would have nothing to do with him. Mole took pity on this man, and offered to help him. So he burrowed underground one night, to the very place where the beloved maiden slept. He then took out her Spirit Heart and returned it to the man. "If you swallow this," Mole said, "She will return your affections." The man could not see the Spirit Heart and was not sure if Mole was teasing him or not, but he was so desperate that he did as he was told. And the very next day, the maiden awoke with her head filled with thoughts of this man. She could not understand her sudden change of thought, but she went straight to him and confessed her love. The young man was overjoyed, and they were soon married. This confused the magicians, who knew how much the woman had hated him only days before. When they found out that little Mole was responsible for her change of heart, they became jealous of his powers and threatened to kill him. So, he was forced to hide underground from them, and he has remained there to this day, still too frightened to come back out."

"Hey Scarlet, I was wonderin'... what tribe are you from? Since you were in Oklahoma, I thought maybe you might be a Cherokee, but I wasn't sure."
"Does it really matter?"
"Well, no, but I just curious. Whoever yer people are, they've got some good stories, is all."
She smiled. "If you must know, I am of the Tsalagi people. To you, the Cherokees. Good guess, my friend. What of your people?"
He shrugged. "I'm kind of a... loner. My past's not too interestin'."
"Your stories do not seem to reflect this... uninteresting past of yours."
"Yeah, well... I don't really like to talk about it."
"It is only by telling our stories that they can continue to live."
"Well, maybe I've got some stuff that I don't want to keep living."
"You should not be ashamed of your past. Without it, you would not be here."

He was silent.
"I am sorry if I have offended you, Logan."
"No, it's alright." He looked at her and was surprised to see the quiet understanding in her eyes.

I will follow
Her on her path
Scarlet's Walk
through the violets
just tell your
gods for me
all debts are off this year
they're free to leave
yes they're free
to leave

They stopped that night in a particularly crowded Hooverville. Scarlet was setting up their own little camp, and Logan had wandered off, hoping to find a hastily erected outhouse of some sort. He was on his way back when he heard the scream.
"Logan!"
"Scarlet!" His pace quickened to a run. When he returned, he saw a group of burly men surrounding Scarlet. He could smell the alcohol.
"Hey girlie, why don't you do a rain dance for us?"
"It's so hot out, wouldn't you be more comfortable without all that leather on?"
She was trying to fight them off, but one of the men had easily grabbed both her wrists in one hand. Logan didn't want to give him the chance to put the other hand anywhere.
"Alright, leave the lady alone!"
One of the men sneered. "You going to stop us?"
"Maybe I am," replied Logan. He punched the man holding Scarlet, lashed out a foot at another man. He was outnumbered, and suffered a number of blows; but he was quick and strong and had an advantage that none of the others did. Soon, he had managed to knock out a few of the men, and the others decided to get away while they still could. Logan dragged the unconscious men several feet away, and left them there. He knew it'd be awhile before they got back up.

Scarlet looked shaken, and he saw her wiping away tears. "You alright?"
"Yes... I'm fine, thanks to you." She smiled. "But you're hurt... let me help you."
"No, I'll be fine."
"You're bleeding! And your left eye is already swelling..." She looked in her pack for a rag, which she wet from her canteen. Logan sighed and allowed her to wipe off his face.
"Wait... under the blood... there are no cuts to your skin. And your eye..." her own eyes widened, "Your eye is already healed!" She frowned. "Are you a god? Or do you just have powerful medicine?"
"No, no... I'm just... I... well, I don't really know how to explain it. But I've been able to do it about as long as I can remember. Here... let me see that knife of yours." Silently, she handed it to him. He cut a gash in his arm, and she gasped as it almost immediately closed back up.

leaving terra
leaving terra
there was a time
when I thought that
Her destiny
should've been
mine
Big Brave Nation
but instead her Medicine
now forgotten

Logan was surprised at how well Scarlet seemed to react to his... ability. She had been a little taken aback at first, but soon moved on. Many people Logan had known had not taken this discovery nearly so calmly, accusing him of dark magic or witchcraft or any number of things. How ironic, he thought, that this Indian woman, whose beliefs have so often been dismissed as superstition, is the only one to just accept it.

They kept moving, finding the occasional oddjob here and there, never staying anywhere for more than a week or two. Weaving their way west, Logan was surprised at how long his relationship with Scarlet had remained innocent. It was not his usual way with women, to say the least. He enjoyed her companionship, and once in awhile he idly wished for something more. However, he hadn't the slightest idea of how to approach the topic to her without offending her pride. And he was unsure as to whether or not she felt the same, so he forced himself to look, but not touch. Right now, he watched her sleep. She looked so innocent, breathing softly. He watched her a little while longer, then went to sleep himself.

One morning, they finally passed the sign they had been waiting to see: "The State of California Welcomes You!"
"I was afraid that it would say 'No Jobs, Keep Going West'", Scarlet joked. Logan smiled. They both hoped to find work on one of the farms here. At first, they found no more luck than they had before. Soon, however, they both found jobs picking grapes at a large vineyard. It was hard work in the hot sun, but they were both far too pleased to be working to care about that. They lived together quietly in a single room they rented, posing as a married couple; he, however, slept on the floor. Scarlet had protested, but he told her that he preferred the floor. It was a lie, but he didn't think she'd agree to it any other way. And besides, he really didn't mind the floor, and a few slightly uncomfortable nights were worth her trust.

"what do you plan to do
with all your stories"
the new sheriff said,
quite proud of his Badge
we're weave them through
every
rocket's red glare
and
huddled masses
you just lift your lamp


The end of the season was quickly approaching, and Logan wanted to quickly tie things up with Scarlet. He was afraid she'd want to part ways, and that was the last thing he wanted. He just couldn't remember the last time he'd felt this way about a girl.

Just then, Scarlet came up to him, a brilliant smile lighting up her face. "Logan, I have good news! Mr. DeWitt, the owner of the vineyard, asked me if I would be interested in staying here year round, to help look after his children! He'll pay me ten dollars a week and I'll have a place to stay!" By now she had noticed that the look on his face was somewhat less than thrilled. "What's wrong?"

"Oh... nothin', darlin'... just that... well... I was going to ask... I mean..." He got down on one knee. "Will you... marry me?"

She looked at him, her face falling. "Oh... Logan... oh, no, I... couldn't. I have enjoyed spending time with you, and I am grateful for the way you have treated me. But you and I... are too different. Our paths have crossed briefly, but now I think that they will fork. I'm sorry, Logan... I knew that you were... fond of me. But it could never be." She gave him a sad smile.

He swallowed. "I... understand. Good luck... in your new life. And if you run into any moles... send them my way."

He began walking back to the boarding house they had been staying at. She did not follow him.

Logan packed his few possessions and drove off, working his way up the coast. He wondered how long it would take him to stop feeling numb.

I will follow
Her on her path
Scarlet's Walk
through the violets
just tell your
Gods for me
all debts are off this year
they're free to leave
yes they're free
to leave

Years later, after the war, he saw Scarlet. He was in a small, dark cafe, and she had aged. Her red hair was mostly gray, and her beautiful brown eyes were surrounded by wrinkles, but he would have recognized her anywhere. He knew that he had not noticeably aged in the last 20 years. Logan narrowed his eyes, threw some money down on the table, and walked out of the place without giving her a second glance. He did not think she had seen him, and at any rate she did not follow him.

Some wounds would never heal.

leaving terra
leaving terra
if you're a thought
you will want me
to think you
and I did
and I did


-- fin
Note: I'm definitely not an expert on Native Americans. I got some background information from . That said... I wanted to write this story because of all the inspiration Tori Amos' CD Scarlet's Walk has given me. If you haven't heard it, it's a... beautiful crazy roadtrip across America, and several of the songs were inspired by Tori's own Cherokee background and the way Native Americans had been treated throughout America's history. And besides, if I'm going to write all these Scarlet's Walk stories, then Scarlet's gotta have a story too! Thanks for reading ^_^