Disclaimer: I do not own Smallville or Supernatural.
Summary: Takes place after season 7, episode 1 of Supernatural and season 7, just after episode 13 of Smallville. AU. Castiel wakes up in the middle of a massive city in a world with seemingly no angels or demons and a mission from god.
Castiel sighed as he trudged down the street, surrounded by the general hubbub of Metropolis in the early morning; people making their ways to work and their families, people going in and coming out of shops. He had to admit despite his preference for solitude he did enjoy watching the human's grow and evolve around him; even now surrounded by corruption he still enjoyed being able to bask in this body's inherent mortality.
It was strange; he had awoken in this city with no memory of the last week and a basic message from god: protect this city. While he did not understand why it was this city specifically at first he had soon learnt that most of the other large human settlements had their own protectors; costumed crusaders and vigilantes.
He stopped in front of the building he had been searching for; a place the humans called "The daily planet"; having been through many human cities and met many people; ergo seeing many buildings, he could safely say it was one of the "gaudiest" buildings he had ever seen; to use human terms.
This wasn't the first time he had been here; mere days ago he had come through and seen the building and, by pure chance, stumbled inside looking for information; he had soon discovered that the large building was dedicated to spreading News and had realized upon seeing the people working and receiving information that it would be highly beneficial to work here in order to find out and stop the troubles this city had most efficiently with a minimum amount of difficulty.
After gleaning information from the mind of the "editor's secretary" he had discovered the editor had been replaced mere days ago and that the position was currently being filled by someone named "Lex Luthor"; from there it had been about finding out who was in charge and "bribing" them with "currency", along with a bit of memory "alteration".
He nodded at the secretary as he stepped past, watching her snap to attention at the editor badge pinned to his overcoat. He vaguely heard her mention Mr. Luthor as he opened the door and found himself enlightened as he stepped into the office.
The man seated behind the desk stood up, fixing him with a blank gaze. "Mr. Winchester, I assume?"
Castiel found himself slightly puzzled. "I have no doubt that you have seen my image and read my name elsewhere, most probably in the file requested to obtain this position, why did you just say 'You assume'?"
Lex stared at him, blinking. "I heard that you were blunt, but I had no idea just how blunt."
Castiel tilted his head at Lex, fixing him with a blank stare. "I do not understand, how can a person be 'blunt'? I was under the assumption that only a weapon such as a sword or perhaps a tool such as a pencil could become blunt. How am I 'blunt'?
Lex stared. 'He can't be serious...?' He locked gazes with the man. 'He is.'
"By blunt I meant 'to-the-point', it's a term of expression." He stated with a confused expression. "Though I'm curious as to how you would not know that, Mr. Winchester." His eyes narrowed at Castiel.
Castiel merely blinked. "I am not very well-versed in 'Slang' and words that brush around the subject, please be 'blunt'."
Lex stared at him for a moment, quirking an eyebrow. "Very well, imagine my surprise when I went to the board and was told that I was being replaced, because of claims of corruption. I'll cut to the chase; how did you do it?"
Castiel stared for a moment longer. 'I must not be suspicious.' Finally he replied. "I bribed them with American money."
For once in his life Lex found himself nearly speechless. "Come again?"
Castiel remembered Dean using this term of expression. 'Repeat myself, I do believe that is its meaning.' "I bribed them with American money."
His declaration was met with stunned silence. "If that is all I have to write a speech that announces me as the new editor."
Lex frowned. "You don't want to do that." At Castiel's curious expression he elaborated. "You see, if you leave now I can still announce myself as editor, the board will yield to my... 'Point of view'. Now I'M going to be blunt, here it is; you go, and I'll pay you off and do nothing. You stay, and I'll make things very... difficult. What's your choice?"
Castiel turned to regard Lex. "Is that a threat?"
Lex smiled coldly. "Of course not, it's a promise."
Castiel eyed the man behind the desk. 'Evidently he will not let this go. He is considerably wealthy and most probably delusional from his thought process. Perhaps... As inelegant as it is, maybe, just this once, I should use Dean's approach.'
Castiel calmly blinked at the man and slid forwards, slamming his right fist into Lex's temple. He then grabbed the man and threw him over his shoulder, marching out into the bullpen.
Chloe usually came in very early in the morning in an attempt to get some work done without being watched by Lex.
When Chloe walked into the Daily Planet that morning she expected to have to write obits all day while being monitored by Lex, save for the first few hours she was in. She DIDN'T expect to have a man in a tan overcoat walking towards her; a dull, blank look on his face as he hefted LEX over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.
"W-Who are you?"
Castiel stared at the young blonde woman standing before him with wide eyes. He considered the situation and then decided. 'To belay suspicion I should pretend that he is a burden.'
He casually nodded at his name tag, proudly proclaiming him as 'Castiel Winchester, Editor-in-chief'. "Your new editor. You work here, correct?" The blonde nodded, still staring. He shifted Lex and laid him on the ground. "Then take his legs please."
He wasn't sure how she would react, but he didn't expect her to grin so widely and reach out to grab them immediately. He decided to explain the situation, just in case. "He attempted to threaten me so I knocked him unconscious and we are now going to throw him outside." Her grin widened even further.
He calmly grabbed Lex's arms and lifted at the same time as the young woman and they walked up the stairs from the basement.
Chloe knew that they were attracting stares but she couldn't help grinning. She had never even dreamed that she would have the pleasure of helping dump Lex out of the planet. She looked up, regarding her editor with bright eyes. She hadn't even known him for 15 minutes but she could already tell she was going to like him.
They carefully edged their way through the revolving door (That required some skill) and made their way to the three steps leading up to the Planet. Her new editor regarded her with curiosity as she stepped towards the steps. "What are you doing?"
She looked up to blink. "I was... helping you to get him down the stairs?"
He tilted his head at her. "...Very well. I had assumed that we would merely throw him down the stairs." She blinked at him. "But I suppose three steps is not a massive distance, if you wish we can carry him."
She gawked at him for a second and then shook her head. "No! No, we can throw him, I don't mind."
He tilted his head again and turned to examine her. "Very well. We swing and then release him to ensure that the momentum allows him to clear the stairs, correct?"
She gulped and nodded.
He turned and started to slowly sway Lex side-to-side, allowing her to slowly catch up to his speed. "We release him on three. One... Two... Three." And they released.
As Chloe watched Lex fly down the stairs, hitting the floor with a dull 'Thud' she revised her earlier opinion; life wasn't cruel, life... was sweet.
She turned to see her new Editor looking at her. "What's your name?" He asked her, and she noticed for the first time just how gravelly and deep his voice was, as though he had been eating gravel.
"Chloe Sullivan." She said with a nervous edge. His gaze was... Intense, like Clark when he was using X-ray vision.
He nodded and seemed to ponder for a moment before he turned to her again. "Which floor do you work on?"
She blinked, wondering where he was going with this. "The basement."
He nodded again. "And where do you aim to work in the future?"
She hesitated. Was this some sort of test? "Under the Tiffany lamps, near the top floor."
He "Hm'ed" in his throat and then turned back to her and nodded a third, final time. "Very well. Report there tomorrow, pick a desk and ask the person sitting next to you to show you around. For now take the day off."
And with that he walked away, leaving her gawking after him.
"Hey Clark!" He turned from where he was baling the hay to look at her curiously, noticing how happy she was.
"Hi Chloe, shouldn't you be at work?" He asked her with a smile on his face.
Her smile widened. "I've got the day off!" She replied with sparkling eyes.
He put down the pitchfork, surprised. "Lex gave you the day off?"
Her smile turned wistful. "Lex doesn't own the Planet anymore; I wish I'd arrived just a little bit earlier..."
He arched an eyebrow at her in response. "What happened?"
Her smile suddenly split into a huge grin, her eyes wide and practically glowing. "It's so awesome! Apparently Lex has been replaced as editor by a new guy; his names Castiel Winchester. Anyway, so Lex apparently threatened Castiel, so Castiel hit him, knocked him clean out and then carried him out of the building. I met him at the stairs and helped carry him out the building; I took his legs and then we swung him by his arms and legs and threw him down the last few stairs! He promoted me and gave me the day off!"
Clark stared at his beaming friend. "Well... Congratulations!" His face broke into a smile. "So, you threw Lex down the stairs?"
She nodded rapidly. "He landed on his face!" She looked as though Christmas had come early.