AN: This is just a on shot that was inspired by the song Walking Behind by The Moffatts. It's in Alexis' point of view, and if you don't know who she is, she is a 19 year old girl, that lived on the streets, and became friends with Booth and Brennan while they were investigating Dylan's murder in Boy in the Shroud. The full story between them is my story 'The Life and Times of a Child On The Streets'
So yeah just a random one shot, total angst and fluff
Songs of the Life of those in Denial
I sat on the platform of the Jeffersonian, rubbing my eyes after all I had seen today. Everyone had gone home by now, but the drama seemed to stay. I was fortunate to see the many tortures that Booth and Brennan have to go through in their lives, knowing that they can't be together.
I sighed again, thinking over everything that happened.
Booth came for some reason to talk to her, but Brennan was talking to some other man. I don't know who he was or what he was doing, but he seemed like bad news. He, like every other guy in Brennan's life, except for Booth, just wanted to have sex with her. Not understanding her, or knowing what she has gone through, just another sex toy.
Booth saw them talking and obviously didn't like it. I could tell he was mad, beyond mad actually. But his eyes didn't say that. His eyes screamed sadness and disappointment. I could practically hear him screaming 'She will go out with everyone before she even looks at me won't she?' in his mind.
My heart clenched when I saw how upset he was. But Booth, being Booth, knew better then to confront them, knowing he would most likely get his ass kicked by Brennan the second she had the chance. He doubled back and hurried out of the Jeffersonian, ignoring the other Squints' question about why he was here and what he wanted.
But too no avail, I noticed that Brennan had seen him. She looked guilty, but I could tell by the confused glint in her eye that she didn't know what she was feeling guilty for. She watched him as he left the building, but took no bother in chasing after him.
But thankfully for me, and her, she dismissed who ever she was talking to. He soon left, but not without me shooting a nasty glare in his direction. The man quivered under my stare before practically bolting out of the Jeffersonian. Hehe, score!
I looked back to see Brennan in her office, staring at her laptop. It was obvious that it wasn't on, since she wasn't typing furiously, and her eye's seemed glossed over.
She had been feeling guilty lately. She always thought that she was upsetting Booth 24/7 and it mad her not only mad, but sad, when she didn't know what was making him so…distant.
She sat in her office for a good hour, before being disturbed by Zack. She left her office and headed to limbo, and that was the last I saw of her until she was leaving for the night. And she left early, which freaked me out. But I could tell she had a hard week, and needed sleep.
I called Booth to see if he was ok, and he couldn't talk because he had too much to do. Yeah too much to do my ass! He just didn't want to talk about how every time he sees his 'partner' with another man it shatters his heart into millions of pieces.
I don't think this can go on any longer. These two are obviously crazy for each other, and are either too blind to see it, or don't want to see it. Must love the drama that this lab houses!
But OF COURSE! When the worst situations come around, it always gives you musical inspiration.
I looked down to the notebook by my arm. Musical staffs drawn across the line with musical notes drawn into them, with the words below them. I flipped through the pages and sighed, it was scary how much this song fitted to them.
I decided to try out the chords to see if they would fit with the song, so I walked into Brennan's office and grabbed my acoustic guitar that I kept in there. I walked back out to the platform only to see Booth looking through my notebook
"Nice song. Just right it?" Booth said obviously knowing it was about him and Brennan
I nodded "Yeah, It's about…well I think you know," I said almost in a whisper
"Yeah," Booth said sadly before leaning against the examination table "Play it," he urged
I sighed and looked into his eyes, he was serious, but I had to be sure "Are you sure?" I asked
He nodded "Play," he ordered
I sighed and walked onto the platform "You are a gluten for punishment," I said taking my seat near my notebook and tuned my guitar quickly
He nodded and looked to his arms, crossed around his chest "I know," he whispered
My heart cringed; this was a torture he had to go through every day. I felt so bad for him. I sighed and placed my fingers on the neck of the guitar, and slung my other hand down over the body of the guitar to strum at the stretched wires
I started playing the first few notes, they were soft, and melodic, making you involuntarily want to sway, but I held myself still. I took in a deep breath, and looked at him again, he was staring at the same spot. I shook my head and started the words
"She's running
And he's walking behind
He's trying
But he's last in her line
His love's dying but he keeps on tryin'
He lives in fear with a love that's clear
He's got love that he needs to give but she's afraid to let him in," I began keeping my eyes on him, to make sure to stop if he wanted me too, but he didn't move.
"To her world with no together
She can't see him in her picture
She wants love but her heart won't let her let him in
He's walking behind
He's walking behind," I sing, and smile, wondering if he read the next part. And if he did, he probably wouldn't believe it.
"The phone's ringin'
Is it her on the line?
Does he answer
Or is he wasting his time?
Her loves dying but she keeps on trying
She lives in fear of a love that's clear
She's got love that she needs to give but he's afraid to let her in," I looked to him again, he was smirking. I knew he wouldn't believe it.
"To his world with no together
He can't see her in his picture
He wants love but his heart won't let him let her in
She's walkin' behind
Yeah
They've got a love to give
But they're afraid to let it in
She's got a love to give
And he's got a love to give
So let em' in
Yeah
In a world with no together
She can't see him in her picture
She wants love so let him in
To his world with no together
He can't see her in his picture
He wants love but his heart won't let him let her in
He's walking behind
She's walking behind," I finished the last chords and then stopped my playing, looking to Booth, for some sort of reaction.
He nodded "It sounds about half right," he said sadly
I sighed and set the guitar down "You don't know how she acts when you aren't around," I said "When you left here, I saw nothing but guilt in her eyes, she knew she was making you feel bad. But It's Brennan, she doesn't know why she is making you feel that way," I said begging for his eye contact
He looked up, his brown eyes glazed over with sadness, his throat muscles tensed and his arms crossed tightly over his chest. He simply shook his head, unable to reply verbally
"Yes, what I said was true. But I don't know if she doesn't know why you feel this way, or if she doesn't want to know," I pointed out
I didn't know that Brennan was listening to the conversation, but she soon stepped into the light, her eyes were red and puffy, she was crying. Her eyes seemed dry, and I guessed that she was crying after she left, and stopped just seconds ago.
He looked to her, his expression loosening, but keeping its saddened look.
I looked at the two, one with un-shed tears in his eyes, and one with tears still dripping off her face. I couldn't take this anymore; these two were killing themselves little by little, every…single…day
"Ok, we are dealing with this," I said "I am not letting you guys do this anymore!"
"Doing w-what?" Brennan said through rigid breaths
"Brennan, you have to tell him, and Booth you have to tell her," I said
"No I don't," Booth whispered
"Yes you do," I said extremely annoyed
"I don't either," Brennan said quietly
I laughed, "You want evidence don't you? That's understandable because that's the only thing you can base your life on! Ok I can give you both Evidence!" I screamed, feeling guilty that I was yelling at them, but couldn't apologize because I was too mad.
She winced at my words and turned her face, crossing her arms over her chest, eventually turning her gaze to the ground.
I almost jumped off the platform steps and walked to her. I took her hand and brushed it over her face "What are these?" I asked
"Tears," she whispered
"Right, indicating that you were crying. I never see you cry, you never cry. The only time you do is when something is REALLY bothering you, such as wanting to ignore a love that is hurting both you and your partner. You can take being eaten away yourself, but you can't take seeing him in pain," I almost hissed, my hands still clenched around her wrist "Am I right?" I challenged
She brought her gaze to mine, a fresh sheet of tears clouding over her eyes. She looked to Booth and looked back to her feet.
"Am I right?" I repeated
"Yes," she whispered almost inaudibly
I dropped her arms and walked to Booth "And you," I said "Why else would you quickly double back and leave the Jeffersonian the second that you see Brennan talking to another man, assuming they are going out. Because you can't take seeing her with someone else, and all you want is for her to give you a chance, but you are too damn proud to tell her!"
He looked to me, his stance suggesting he wouldn't back down, and he stayed silent
I smiled and got into his face "I suggest you make your move Mr. Tough Guy. I wouldn't want you to wait too long, and then she is taken. I would really hate it if some sleez bag took her away from you too," I said, smiling at the anger in his eyes
He almost growled and turned away from me
"I suggest you get on with it," I said angrily taking my notebook and guitar and walking off the platform "Before it's too late. Forget lines and science, and follow your hearts for once," I said walking into the shadows, but staying within ear shot
I heard footsteps; she was walking up the platform to face him. I looked around the corner and saw her staring into his eyes. He was still in defensive stance, and she was also.
At first I was thinking they were going to do that freaky non-verbal talking thing, but I was proven wrong
"I'm sorry," I heard her whisper as she looked to her feet
"For what?" he asked apathetically
She looked to him, her eyes pleading him to stop torturing her "For Hurting you," she choked out
"You didn't hurt me," he said. LIES
"Yes I did," she whispered "I hurt your feelings, and I have been for the past week, and I don't know what I haven't done anything to stop."
"Maybe it's because we are just partners Bones," he said
She was shaking her head "No we aren't," she admitted. YES! "You and I both know that."
I saw him nod "We are friends too," he said
Oh that son of a bitch! I swear if they both leave here angry or upset I am punching him very hard in the nose!
But I saw her shaking her head again "It's more then even that," she said
He looked to his feet and I saw him loosening his muscles "I know," I barely heard him hear
She sighed and wiped away another stray tear "Now what do we do?" she asked
"What do you want to do?" he asked quietly
I could tell that she was overwhelmed, and it had to be sooner or later that she would hit the breaking point
"I don't know," she said turning her back to him "For so long I could compartmentalize this. I focused on my work; I ignored all of the alternate meanings that everyone pointed out to me in everything that you said! I found other sexual partners to try and feel this need but I couldn't do it, I can't do anything about –"
I saw him move closer to her, and before she could say the word 'it' he grabbed her arm and spun her towards him. I saw him lock his arm around her waist and bring his other hand to her neck, bringing her lips to his.
I sighed, Thank God! I said to myself as I watched the two kissing passionately. The kiss was getting hotter and hotter, and I had to admit, that I thought they were going to have sex right there, but they pulled back, breathing heavily.
He ran his fingers through her hair, and rested his hand on her shoulder. I saw her open her mouth to speak but he pressed his lips to hers to silence her
"What ever we do, we'll do it together," I heard him whisper