An American Tradition

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, nor do I have enough money to own our political system.

There was a ritual, a tradition, if you will, for Alfred when it came time to pick a new president or decide whether or not to keep an old one. It was always the same and had three steps. The first step was pain, the second was anticipation, and the third was jubilation. It was an old tradition, but it was an American Tradition and that made it so much better than other countries' traditions.

The Months and Weeks before…

Alfred hated the time before someone got elected to President. None of the national elections were exactly a picnic, but the presidential elections were always the worst. He cracked his neck and tried to get over the headache as he continued his daily routine. Brush teeth, shower, dry body and hair, dress, etc. all in the name of looking like his ever handsome, perfect hero self. But in the weeks (and months now with how rabid the media would seize upon presidential elections) before the presidential election, all of his normal routine would go down the drain as he was bombarded by headaches and stress.

Nations were a funny thing. They lived as long as their countries and peoples existed and could not be permanently damaged by something unless it was a huge attack on their home soil. However, while their bodies where the land, their minds the culture, their souls were the people. That meant for Alfred F. Jones, the living embodiment of the most epic nation to ever grace this humble planet, when elections rolled along that created strong, opposing opinions in his people (like a presidential election) he was "blessed" with a tremendous headache as his soul was torn in different directions.

Not that he would give up his elections! There was pain, yes. And it left him feeling tired and achy and wishing the campaigning months would just be over already, please. None of that mattered in the long run for him, though, because it just proved his citizens, his children, cared so much about him that they would scream and holler and fight to their last breathe.

Alfred shook his head in the mirror. When he thought of it like that, maybe the headaches were worth it. Another lance of pain (in a somewhat poetic mode, he reflected that it was like having an untrained, wannabe tap dancer stomping on his temples with sharp, heavy cleats) bashed through his poor, beaten mind, and he flinched from the pain. Well, the headaches were 90% worth it.

The Election Day

As Alfred had done for so many elections in the past, he had secluded himself in one of his oldest cabins in the Virginian woods. Election days were so stressful! All of the clamor, arguing, pandering, fighting from the past year coming to a climax in his skull and rippling through his soul. He secluded himself for a couple reasons: one, he did not want to deal with any other loud noises that came with being around others. His soul was at the pinnacle of its division (never as bad as the Civil War, nothing could ever be as bad as those years when his children's blood washed his body and he could feel them dying and killing and it hurt and tore him and why, God, why won't they stop?) and he didn't need other distractions and noise as he tried to rest and relax through the process. He was a pro at this after so many elections, but just like asking a mother who has given birth to multiple children, it never got easier.

The second reason was more… for his children. Alfred, the United States of America, had never actually voted. It seemed almost treasonous (although, he should ask Arthur or Kiku or Toris, or any of those really deep countries if it was possible to be treasonous to yourself) but it was like asking a mother to choose between her children, like in Sophie's Choice (which he would like to go on record as saying he did not cry during that movie, unlike what certain nations will tell you. Heroes never cry and those other nations are lying jerks!). Alfred couldn't vote though. While he was way old enough, it would be awkward for him to choose between candidates and what if the one he didn't vote for won? How weird would it be for his new boss to find out that the physical representation of all that is the Great United States of America voted for the other guy? Not to mention that when it was a re-election year for the sitting president he would deal with questions by the president and the president's family on how he as the United States felt about both the candidates and it was not fair to give bad news and upset his boss and boss's family or give them an unfair advantage with good news. That would be just awful and unfair for everyone involved. So, Alfred stayed neutral and let his citizens do the voting for him. That hadn't led him to complete destruction (not even the Civil War could keep the Hero down!) so he felt comfortable with not voting.

But all the twitching and fidgeting he did in his cabin was filled to the brim with nervous excitement. Like an impatient child waiting for the toy store to open so he could get his new game, the United States wanted to know the election's winner. He always was the first one to know. Even with all the effort CNN and other news organizations put in to being first, he always knew first. It was simply because he was The United States, and he could feel his people. He could feel what they wanted and as they voted he felt the tide shift from one candidate to the other and then back again like a pendulum or a game of eeny-meeny-minnie-mo. Eventually the polls would shut and the pendulum would stop and he would know. Like a firework in his mind the winner's name would appear and the anticipation, the torturous waiting would be over. But till that time all he could do was sit and wait and wait and wait.

The Inauguration

This was always his favorite part. He got to meet his new boss. The boss that dedicated months of campaigning, of sleepless nights, of vicious media attacks and investigation to find all the dirty laundry; all to serve America—or at least that is how Alfred saw it. And now, Alfred was going to meet his new boss. It had been an entirely new race this time with two new candidates (Alfred's favorite kind because he got to meet new people and Alfred loved meeting new people) and it had been tough. Both candidates had been strong with intelligent arguments and winning personalities. Now, the big moment would be coming. Alfred would be introduced to the new President.

There was a ritual for this just as with every country. For Alfred, it went as such. The Boss would be lead by Secret Service to a private, unknown room of the White House. Alfred would be waiting there. In front of the Secret Service, the vice president, and the president's and vice president's families, Alfred would introduce himself. He would say that he would abide the new president's laws and help him in any way that he can, and then remind the President of his promise to protect and lead America to a new, better future. The noob Bosses were always confused, but that was okay because all Alfred had to do was look them in the eyes and release his National Power. Every Nation had one, it was a colored glow that surrounded the Nation that contained all the power of the Nation (Russia's was purple and showed up whenever he did that weird laugh of his… must be because he is a commie). That was all it took. Every citizen would understand at that point. It was an instinctual thing. That didn't mean they totally understood what Alfred was or how he existed, but they knew he was the United States of America and the rest could come later. Alfred had four years to help his new boss. As Alfred looked into the astonished and adoring (because his children always loved him and that just made him feel so great) eyes of his new boss, he couldn't help but smile. Just thinking of what the future held always made him happy and he had a really good feeling about his new boss.

It was going to be a great next few years.

AN: So this is my first attempt at writing ever. Please be gentle! If you have valid criticism that would make me a better writer than I will be glad to hear it and if you love it I would love to hear that as well (and maybe you could tell me what you loved so that I can keep doing it?). Just nothing nasty, please. Saying mean things for the sake of being mean or making yourself feel better is no help to anyone. Thank you for reading! Please review if you have the time!

Have a lovely day,

91REDROSES