I guess I never thought it would end this way. All I wanted was for it to work. I never said it was done. That was you. You ruined me and you will continue to do so. I hate you so much. I never want to talk to you again but I will. I will because I have to. You are my lifeline. Without you I am nothing. With you I am worse than nothing, but at least I am alive. Maybe death would be preferable to this. Can you feel pain in death? Is there heartbreak? Sorrow? Will you be there? If you will be there I choose immortality.
I guess I need to start back in the beginning. You and I. The meeting. The darkness. The pain. Can you imagine what I have to go through. It is weird enough protecting you after what you did. I feel as though you cut my heart out. Literally, you did. Theoretically, you did too.
I guess I really need a better sense of judgment in where loyalties lay. Then I would avoid lots of these problems. No more fallouts. No more death. No more pain. Is that even possible?
I was sitting there. Reading a wonderful novel. Enjoying the sunshine. You ruined it. You just had to pick that moment to choose my demise. I see how it is. I see right through those dark, sorry eyes. You had a job to do and by gosh you did it. I just wish I wasn't the price you had to pay. There is nothing I can do to change that either. By the end of this, I will be gone. To where, I know not. I just know that you will have to finish me off. You stole me away. You locked me up. You are holding me captive for your leader. I get it. You want to know what I don't get, I see no reason for this to have happened. But now I see through the "cute" exterior. I see right into the black and slimy heart beneath your ribcage. I must stop writing now for the pain in my head is enormous. The only thing I have to keep me company is the ticking of my only source of revenge. My last laugh. It sits, gleaming on the ground. I hide it in my skirt when you are near. You won't ever get your pocket watch back.
A