Hey my lovely readers. I wrote in hopes that it would help me deal with some things that happened this week. So I must warn you the characters are not exactly the way they would normally be. Not sure how good it since I changed what actually happened into a story format, but hey whatever. Please review.
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Changes
"Come on guys," Cyborg yelled from the common room, "Movie night compliments of Cy is going to start momentarily.
"Cyborg!" Robin yelled walking at a fast pace out of the kitchen, " There is no need to yell when most of us are in the kitchen!"
"Yeah what's that all about?" Beastboy questioned while carrying a bunch of snacks.
He threw most of the stuff he was carrying down on the table and plopped down on the couch. Raven walked into the common room at that moment, carrying blankets for everyone. Beastboy stared at her as she walked by before turning his attention back to Cyborg.
"I just wanted to make sure everyone knew." Cyborg stated
"I think the whole world heard." Raven rolled her eyes and sat next to Beastboy.
Beastboy glanced over at her quickly. Robin and Starfire had taken their seats on the floor while Cyborg sat on the far side of the couch. He turned on the movie and turned off the lights before settling into his seat.
About an hour into the movie, Beastboy whispered into Raven's ear, "Need a pillow?"
He moved his arm indicating she could use him as a pillow if necessary. Raven gave a small contemplative smile. Thinking for a moment about the offer she decided to go for it. She was starting to like Beastboy as more than a friend and there was the possibility he liked her too, at least it seemed like it. Not giving it another thought she curled up in his arms.
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Sometime after that the Titans started to drop into slumber. Beastboy was still partly awake. He glanced down at the dozing girl in his arms and smiled. She looked so cute when she was sleeping. He studied her features, her soft skin, lavender hair, and her chest moving slowly up and down due to breathing.
"Urg. Stop thinking like that Beastboy!" He scolded himself. "She's your best friend. Besides you like Terra."
He brought his gaze up to face again. Her lips more precisely. They were parted ever so slightly as if ready to….
"No!" He scolded himself yet again, but he couldn't get those lips out of his head.
He gently lifted her chin up and slowly but surely brought his lips down to hers. Raven's eyes shot open. She was so shocked she didn't move. When Beastboy ended the kiss, Raven buried her head in his shoulder, her breathing erratic as well as her heartbeat. All the muscles in her body were tensing up and she started shaking. Not badly, but enough to think she was cold. Beastboy stared out at the darkness shocked by what he had done too before realizing she was shaking.
"Hey Rae? Are you ok?" He whispered in her ear.
A chill went down her spine as he spoke, "Yeah." She responded whispering too.
Beastboy accepted this and didn't say another word. Slowly Raven calmed down and she let her exhausted body fall asleep again. Beastboy however was still fully awake. Raven's body was mesmerizing to him. He wanted to touch her…maybe even please her.
"Ag! Get out of my head perverted thoughts! Think of Terra. Think of Terra." He yelled to himself.
His yells halted as Raven turned over to her side in her sleep. Her chest was more visible to him in the black shirt she wore. It was provoking him. Taunting him. He just had to touch….
"Don't you dare Beastboy!" A voice in the back of his head yelled or rather screamed out.
It was as if he had no control of his hand. Slowly he pushed the black material that made up her shirt up and over her stomach. He caressed her stomach gently and lightly dragged his hand upwards. He felt the soft fabric of her bra. He could feel her breath becoming erratic again. He knew she was awake and waiting for what he would do. Raven gulped and tried to breath normally saying nothing just like before.
He took her left breast in his hand and squeezed. Raven shut her eyes tightly, trying to suppress the pleasurable feeling the rising in her. She felt him squeeze and rub his hand against her eventually moving the material that stood in his way from the actual skin. His fingertips caressed her nipple. Raven buried her face in his neck. A strange feeling was taking over her. She wasn't entirely sure if she should stop him. Part of her felt like she wanted this. A few minutes of this activity sent waves of pleasure through out her whole body. She could feel the liquid stain her panties. Beastboy pulled his hand out and for a few moments was content with his undertaking.
Raven, however, was completely tense. The experience was one she had never felt before and dare she say it…she was bit timid at what had just happened. It wasn't everyday someone she felt very strongly for touched her in such a way and could make her feel so…so…she couldn't put a word to it.
She reached for his hand involuntarily and squeezed it. Beastboy squeezed back and tightened his grip around the small girl. Neither wanted to let go. After a while, Raven finally fell back to sleep. Even Beastboy fell asleep for a while only waking when he felt Raven shift her hips against his. He glanced at her. She appeared asleep. He shut his eyes tightly, trying to drown out the voices in his head. His hand once again brushed past her soft skin. However, instead of heading northwards he headed south…. toward her shorts.
Raven gasped as she felt a hand slip past the elastic band in her shorts. Fingertips grazed her hipbone and continued to drift down to her vagina. She quickly grabbed his wrist. Beastboy felt a surge of guilt go through him and he brought his hand out of her shorts. She linked her fingers with his.
"No." She whispered in his ear.
"Why?" He whispered back
"Because all our friends are right here." Raven pointed at the others lying on the floor.
"Oh yeah. Good reason."
Raven snuggled back into Beastboy's chest and this time both of them fell asleep for good.
The next morning, Raven was the first one up. She pulled herself out of his grip and off the couch. She stretched her arms in the air and turned to look at Beastboy. She gave a small smile at him curling up on the couch. She turned and walked to the kitchen to boil water for tea. As she waited for the water to boil, she started to think about what had happened.
"I wonder what compelled him to do that. What about Terra? Something must have happened between them. I know he's liked her forever and a day, but there has got to be a reason that he would do that."
The kettle's whistle pulled her out of her thoughts and apparently it pulled everyone else out of their sleep.
"Hey Raven." A sleepy Robin came to sit at the table.
She looked over at him as Starfire came to sit on his lap. A strange thought entered into Raven's head.
"I wonder if Beastboy and I could ever be like that."
"Friend Raven? Is everything ok?" Starfire asked worriedly.
"Huh? Oh yeah it is." Quickly she got a cup out of the cupboards and filled it with tea.
She could feel Starfire's eyes on her as she sipped on her tea. Raven just wanted to leave this confusing mess so she used her soul self to slip out of the room, tea in hand. She found herself in front of her room. She typed in the code for her door to open. She entered her domain and placed herself delicately on her bed.
Raven sighed. This was not her ideal situation of how she wanted her and Beastboy to get together. In fact this was not her ideal situation to learn how he was not over Terra and he just wanted to get some sexual satisfaction. Raven's eyes went as wide as saucers.
"Oh god," she said to no one in particular, "Please don't let it be that."
Raven didn't know how long she sat there pondering and thinking, but there was a knock at her door.
"Raven? Can I come in?" Beastboy's voice sounded through the door.
Raven used her powers to open the door. She looked up at him with confused eyes.
"Why did you do it?"
Beastboy was taken aback.
"I…I really don't know."
"Are you and Terra having problems?"
He shook his head pretending to examine something in her room.
"Then why the change?"
"Honestly I don't know."
Raven looked at him curiously, "Beastboy I want to be there for you, but just not only in that way."
Beastboy sighed, "Yeah I know."
Raven sighed too unable to believe what she was about to say, "I think if you have to choose between Terra and me, you should choose Terra."
Beastboy closed his eyes, "I know."
"Oh. Well then I guess that's good." Raven felt she was going to burst into tears.
"Except that it's not that easy."
"How so?" She asked softly.
"I don't know. I kind of feel differently about you, but I don't know." He leaned against the wall and finally just sat down, not knowing what else to do.
"Oh."
"Raven?"
"Yeah?"
"What do you think about the whole the thing if it were to go further?"
"Further?"
"Yeah. I mean being more than friends kind of thing?"
She hesitated, "I would go for it, but there are several reasons why I wouldn't"
"Which are?" His green eyes pieced her lavender orbs.
"Well besides the fact that you still like Terra…this could ruin our friendship. Beastboy you are my best friend and I don't want to loose that."
He nodded, "I understand. Anything else?"
"I really can't imagine why you or any guy for that matter would want to date me."
"What do you mean?" He asked curiously
"Well like for example I don't really have the best track record with guys so I really don't know how to be a girlfriend. I don't think I'd be very a very good girlfriend at any rate."
"If it makes you feel better…I think any guy would be lucky to have you."
Raven blushed, "Thanks."
An awkward silence filled the room.
"Raven?"
"Hmm?"
"How do you want this to be? Like do you just want to act like it never happened?"
She sat lost in thought for a moment. She finally looked over at him, "I don't know. Do I have any other choices?"
"Well," Beastboy thought for a moment, "We could loose all control and go at it. Or we could just roll with it and what ever happens will happen. Or we could act like it never happened. What ever is easier for you."
Raven looked crestfallen, "I really don't know what to do Beastboy. I know I can't just forget what happened because it did happen, but we can't just loose control and go at it. That would lead to…well not good things."
"Well that's a big gray area, however, that's also where it's easiest to maneuver…so good choice." He gave a small smile.
"Beastboy this is all a very new to me…I'm really scared."
"Why?" He looked shocked.
"Because I can't screw this up. I do have a habit of doing that…and I've also been hurt by a lot of guys."
"I don't think you should worry about that. Everything's going to be ok." Beastboy's normal grin could be seen.
Raven gave a shy smile before the alarm sounded. Both Titans leapt up and started for the door.
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I don't know if I'll add more just yet. This was kind of like therapy for me. I was getting way to emotional about everything so I just sat down and wrote.
Please review!