A/N: I'm almost five weeks into The Weekly Hans von Hozel Challenge and realizing it will be easier to post these stories as chapters of one story rather than individual stories. (Thank you to Team Jane for the idea.) So, I'm compiling the four I've already posted before continuing. I didn't want to lose the reviews though and so I've added them to the ends of the first four chapters. They are often funnier than the stories themselves.

The Weekly Hans von Hozel Challenge, Week # 1: Lemons

Sokie's Request

Summary: Sookie spreads in want. Pam is almost costing her of a pleasure on Eric.

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters.

Sookie sprawled on Fangtasia desk with wide legs.

"Yahoo needs you!" she wailed of begging for Eric.

His pole sprang. "My telepath!"

A bursting in of Pam ended coochie love.

"Fuck a zombie!" Pam repeats.

"No, telepath is my choice when you retreat to the bar," Viking spewed.

Pam outs a door. All was returned to humping. Coming too.

Sookie moaned for pleasure in final satisfaction, "I never pine for Bill, my poker."

Eric was of a grinning face. It becomes happy time.

Even desk thrilled with assembled butt cheeks.

A/N: In case you're not familiar yet with The Weekly Hans von Hozel Challenge, and simply think I'm out of my mind, Thyra10, vicvega66, E-F-M, and I started this challenge in the hopes that many will take up the Hans von Hozel baton and write us a weekly fic.

Do an author search of Hans von Hozel and you'll see why we love him. Then do an author search of The Weekly Hans von Hozel Challenge (but remove the spaces between words) to learn more about the challenge or find our thread on The Sookieverse Forum.

Then, put on your Hans von Hozel writing hat and have fun!

Reviews posted prior to 8-5-11:

kleannhouse
2011-07-21 . chapter 1

I am going to figure out the Hans Von Hozel challenge yet. once i do i think i will enjoy reading them

seastarr08
2011-07-16 . chapter 1

So happiness you decide to invent this enjoyable writings. Hey!

Studiokmt
2011-07-15 . chapter 1

LOL.. You made a good telling story!

Northman Maille
2011-07-15 . chapter 1

Hans is many good for the writing. Badness of Pam and her dirty desirous mouth! Eric should danube for her!

Fairyblood
2011-07-15 . chapter 1

*claps* Use of english much story of yahoo and pole!

MommaMinion40
2011-07-14 . chapter 1

you make me giggle. HUGS:)

fffbone
2011-07-14 . chapter 1

LOL Very funny

jtedrick1
2011-07-14 . chapter 1

Pam outs a door. All was returned to humping. lol I found these stories this morning and they have made my day ;)

momzombie
2011-07-13 . chapter 1

Many thanks for happy times with my Suede.

Violetbat
2011-07-13 . chapter 1

LOL! Me a lot happy und a lot laiked dhe "desk thrilled with assembled butt cheeks". Verry Wunderful und kool! *Hahahaha*

Loved it! Had a good time reading it! Have to go check Hans's writing out right now! =) *Hugs*

ehee
2011-07-13 . chapter 1

"I never pine for Bill, my poker."

Need I say more? ;D

penpractice
2011-07-13 . chapter 1

tee hee, 'Even desk thrilled with assembled butt cheeks' - well who wouldn't be.

moxiemo
2011-07-13 . chapter 1

even desk thrilled with assembled butt cheeks! hahahahahaha

nukemlee
2011-07-12 . chapter 1

Yahoo every needs Viking, net zombie.

sassyvampmama
2011-07-12 . chapter 1

OMG... I was reading and thought, "Oh no, TB Franklin Mott has Suki, someone dial the phone very quickly- or send a fast text!"

Glad to hear that there is a sane reason for this tiny bit of hilarity.

peppermintyrose
2011-07-12 . chapter 1

So wrong it's right. I was happy that Pam outed the door and they could get on with it. :D

Gjers-1
2011-07-12 . chapter 1

My keyboard makes to want write myself Hans Von Hozel ditty. "Promises, promises", Suki disbelieves. Must to need reads original Von Hozel's before understands.

Gah...my forte does reviews, no? Hehe...

Chuckles good to happy. ;p

vicvega66
2011-07-12 . chapter 1

My eyes were full of pleasent wettings, my hearts were pitta patta. Danube!

Thyra10
2011-07-12 . chapter 1

Fuck a Zombie!

Hahaha, very funny. And now we need to invite Hans von Hozel to participate.

Honeypop
2011-07-12 . chapter 1

Upon reading this I danubed. My computer said "Look!" And I looked and I read and I danubed .Thanks.

E-F-M
2011-07-12 . chapter 1

You danubed me pleasurelets plenty:) My yahoo singed with Sookies and appreciation of poles spranging.

Wonders if The HvH will writes a fic for The SVM World?

erin1705
2011-07-12 . chapter 1

LOL, that was hilarious! I loved it!