Titel: Anger leads to pain, pt. 1?
Author: Kukka
Pairing: Ryan/The Cohens
Rating: FRC (G )
Summary: Ryan needs to learn how to deal with his problems…
(actually I have no idea were this will lead)
Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Josh Schwartz..I just like to play with it.
But I give it all back once I'm done.
AN: All faults in this are mine and only mine…hope there're not too many.
I felt like it actually is something, resembled to the english language keeps fingers crossed.
Chapter 1Kirsten was standing by the window in the kitchen with worry written all over her face.
She thought that Sandy had a good idea, giving Ryan the old punching bag,
but today her foster son was working on it with such a force, that she couldn't help but to wonder
what was running through his mind.
Part of her wanted to know, wanted to find a way to help him, to make him open up and talk
but the other part of her was afraid to find out whatever it was, that had enough power over the blond young man, to make him react the way he did.
She once again thought of Sandy and how easily it sometimes seemed to him,
to get the kid to talk.
He did understand Ryan better than she did, as least she thought so.
But this time she couldn't relie on her husband, he was busy running the Newport Group and organizing everything regarding the new Hospital. And due to that, rarely ever home.
This time, she had to be the one to talk to Ryan, to make him talk…or maybe she could ask Seth…no,
not good...don't ever ask your child to do what should be your responsibility, she thought to herself.
With a sigh she started the coffee-mashine, waited until it was done, filled two cups and started to walk towards the Poolhouse.
Ryan was clinging to the punching bag, clearly out of breath.
He didn't hear Kirsten knocking, so even her quiet "Hey, Ryan" startled him and he jumped in surprise.
She walked over to him and was about to hand him one of the steaming cups, when he raised up his hand with a whispered "Excuse me" and rushed to the bathroom.
Now Kirsten was really worried about him.
She placed both cups on the table and slowly followed him to the bathroom door.
She tried the doorhandle.
It wasn't locked but she decided to stay outside.
"Ryan ? Sweety are you ok ?" she asked in a calm voice.
She could hear water running but it didn't help to tune out the retching sound.
After a short pause came a "Yeah, I'm fine. Just getting cleaned up" in response.
Not long after that, the water stopped running and Ryan opened the door, only to be met
by Kirstens concerned face.
He walked over to his bed and sat down heavily, trying to shield his bruised knuckles
from her searching eyes.
She shouldn't have to deal with his frustration, his anger about oh so many things.
She shouldn't have to see what he did to himself.
But apparently it was too late, because Kirsten suddenly was beside him taking his left hand
into her own…ignoring his flinch at the sudden touch.
"There are gloves over there, you know?", she asked as she was searching his eyes and pointed over
to the table, that was loaded with books and lots of papers from school.
Ryan had his eyes directed to the floor and didn't look up after she spoke.
He only muttered "Isn't as much fun, when there are gloves involved".
Finally Kirsten let go of his hand and stood up. She reached for the cups and handed one to Ryan.
"Here, it's still warm." She said with a smile "Do you mind if I sit with you for a while ? We don't have to talk, I just want to sit here with you" she added.
He looked up, feeling her eyes on him and said "It's your house. Do whatever you want…".
Wow…, so it's been a good three years since Sandy first brought Ryan home and while she thought that he had finally settled down into the family and was feeling safe, she now was confronted with the guarded, insecure young man from the beginning.
"Ryan…this is as much your house as it is mine or Sandy's or Seth's, you know that. You're a part of this family…I thought you would know that by now." She couldn't hide the frustration in her voice.
"Yeah, I know…it's just…" he couldn't finish.
He wasn't sure what to say, because he wasn't sure how he felt.
How could he explain something that he had not the slightest idea about ? He needed time to think.
He sighed "Kirsten, I'm sorry...but I...I can't explain it to you, right now. My head's all messed up and I don't know what to think…about everything. Sorry". He looked at her with pleading eyes.
"Ok" Kirsten stood up and left without another word.
That went well, so much about the "we don't have to talk" part, she thought with a little sarcasm
as she re-entered the kitchen and placed her cup in the sink.
TBC (?)
Please review and tell me if I should continue.