A/N: Woohoo! I wrote a story! Yay! I haven't written one for ages! I'm so proud. I just wish I'd have picked up a different style of writing, though! Oh well.
Dedicated to the Gals at Isn't It Obvious! You all rock!
And Daniel, who reads all my fics and never says anything bad! (I know you're lying!)
This was written to the sounds of Triple J, the rocking-est radio station available!
Disclaimer: I don't own the HP characters. They're JK's. We love you JK! Don't sue us!
Ron's POV
It'd been happening for about a week or two. Every morning, without fail, Hermione would come down the stairs all ready for breakfast. That wasn't unusual, but the state of her face certainly was.
The area around her eyes were all red and blotchy. Below them were big puffy spots, and the occasional tear track. Obvious signs that she'd been crying.
I never said anything, but I couldn't keep pretending not to notice. So I confronted her on a morning when Harry was still getting ready. It was the third week of her crying, and I meant well, but not everything went to plan.
That morning, Hermione came down and showed no signs (other than the physical) that she'd been crying.
"Morning Ron." she gave her usual greeting.
"G'morning Hermione." I returned, noting her puffy-eyed expression.
"Where's Harry?" she asked, looking about.
"Still getting ready. Come have a seat." I urged, patting the seat next to me.
"Oh, sure." she complied. We sat in silence for a while. I fidgeted a bit, trying to decide what to say.
"'Mione?" I asked, using the pet nickname only I was allowed to use.
"Yes?" she smiled, her cheeks going slightly red. She loves it when I call her that when no-one's around.
"Well. It's just that, yesterday, and this morning. Well…erm. Your face, it…" I stumbled. She frowned, and I had to get the point across quick before she got really mad.
"What about it?"
"Your cheeks, they're all puffy, and your eyes are red. I was wondering. Have you been crying?" I finally got it out. It was getting harder to talk to her through the emotional tension I'd been putting on myself.
"What? My cheeks? I haven't been crying!" she said a little too loudly. She's a bad liar. I saw right through it.
"Come on Hermione. You don't have to lie. Or act tough around me. It's okay." I coaxed. Unfortunately, Hermione didn't think I was being incredibly sincere.
"Are you mocking me?" she started, raising her voice.
"No Hermione,"
"Listen Ron, I don't need you patronising me. I wasn't crying! Just leave it, okay?"
"But-"
"No, Ron. Leave it. I'm going to breakfast." and she left. I sat there, wondering if I'd been seeing things. Deciding I hadn't, I stewed it over a bit more until Harry came down.
"Morning. Where's Hermione? You two have another fight?" he said before I could get a word in.
"Yeah. You got it. Come on, let's go."
The next time I tried was about a week later, when I noticed Hermione looking tired even after starting to go to bed earlier. It didn't quite work well either, and she was getting to be a bit hysterical.
This time, Harry had started up a conversation with Seamus and Dean, on the couch across from mine. Hermione came down the stairs, her hair in a rough ponytail and bags under her eyes.
"Morning everyone." she called. A scattered "Good morning" was heard before the rest went back to their conversation.
"Good morning, Hermione." I said, getting up and standing in front of her. She smiled a little at my ruffled hair.
"I see you've lost your com" she commented. I laughed.
"Yeah. Could've used a spell, but eh." I shrugged my shoulders. She looked ready to walk towards the portrait hole, but I stopped her. "Hermione, there's something I have to ask."
"What is it?" she responded, puzzled.
"Look, don't take this the wrong way, but your face. It's getting worse. You look really tired as well now. I'm getting really concerned." I told her, putting my hand on her arm. She frowned in anger.
"What? Getting concerned that I make you look bad in front of everyone? I'd really prefer it if you kept insults about my appearance to yourself. Now let go of my arm, I'm going." She said, trying to be calm, but the hysteria in her voice was apparent. I dropped my arm and sighed. She stuck her nose in the air and walked out.
Harry looked over and shook his head, "Not again, Ron! That's the second time in a week!"
By the next week Hermione was look terrible. It brought me to tears one morning. It felt bad knowing that she'd been crying for a month over something. It was weird being brought to tears over her. Normally, I'd have the emotions swelling inside and my pride would keep me from showing any emotion towards her, but this was different. Her health was at stake here.
She came down the stairs and I tried to swallow the lump in my throat.
"Hermione?" I croaked.
"What is it?" she asked sincerely, seeing my eyes fill with tears.
"You look-"
"Oh, not again!" she thundered.
"But-"
"I don't want to know Ron. This isn't doing my self-esteem good at all. And now I know that you're brought to tears over the mess that is my face! I don't want to know how repulsed you are by me!" she screamed, and ran back up to her dormitory.
We didn't see her at all after that. Harry couldn't even look me in the eye after hearing what Hermione had screeched.
At dinner, Hermione still hadn't shown up. So after I was done, I fixed her a plate and took it up to the Gryffindor common room. But there was a problem. I wanted to deliver it personally. I went up to my own dormitory and looked around for an idea. Then I spotted my broom. It was there because I didn't like leaving it in the sheds for Malfoy to toy with. Harry had followed suit and they were sitting together up against the wall. I grabbed my one and hopped on. Flying slowly, I made my way down the boy's stairs and up the girls.
Still perched on my broom (I wasn't game enough to see if the landings would let me stand on them), I knocked on the 6th Year Girls' dormitory door. A large gasp then a sob met my ears, shortly followed by a "Come in."
I struggled to stay on my broom, hold the tray of food and open the door, but managed in the end. I stepped into the room and set my broom against the wall.
"Ron? What are you doing up here?" Hermione asked, ready to shout again. She wiped uselessly at her eyes, removing the tears, but it was too late for a cover-up. I'd already seen them.
"Oh Hermione," I said softly. "What are you doing to yourself?"
"I…I'm not. I'm not crying." She hopelessly tried before the tears broke through. I put the tray of food on her bedside table and sat next to her on the bed. She looked terrible. I stroked her arm awkwardly. She pulled away, and then hesitated before finally flinging herself at me. All of a sudden her arms were around my neck, her face in my chest and her frail body pressed up against mine.
"Shh…it's okay. It'll be fine. Come on 'Mione, don't cry" I said softly. She drew her head away and looked me in the eye.
"You were right." She admitted.
"About what?"
"Me. Crying. I've been crying everyday for at least a month. Every morning. And now, I cry myself to sleep." She sobbed.
"Why Hermione? How could you feel bad enough to cry everyday?" I asked, my worry increasing ten-fold.
"Because. It's you." She said tearily before holding me tighter.
"What? What did I do? Please tell me. I want to fix it." I said desperately.
"You can't fix it. Even as you hold me here I feel like crying, I feel guilty. I feel like I'm cheating you." Hermione said bitterly.
"I can't fix it? Why not? Please tell me what I've done" I pleaded.
"It's not what you've done. It's what you haven't done. What you'll never do." She cried, pulling away and hiding her face in her pillow. I moved over next to her and tried to pull her away. But she wouldn't budge. So instead I walked around the other side of the bed and laid down next to her, draping an arm over her middle. Her body, upon feeling my arm, went rigid. And her eyes clenched tighter than before.
"Hermione? Please, I can't stand seeing you like this." I tried, stroking her face. She opened her eyes and gasped at how close I was to her.
"I feel so stupid." She sobbed.
"No, don't." I murmured, "You're not."
"I shouldn't let you get to me so easily."
"I don't understand."
"You probably never will. So forgive me. I have to do this. I have to taste what I'll never have." She said, and moved closer. She put her hand on my cheek and leaned up towards my face. I closed my eyes as she kissed me. Softly and tenderly. Then I started to kiss her back. But she gasped and pulled away.
"You kissed me." I stated, my heart soaring with emotion.
"You kissed me back!" she said, shocked.
"Of course I did, what did you expect me to do?" I asked, smiling in a cheeky manner.
"You, you're not serious!" she said, and I couldn't quite understand what she was having trouble with. "You're playing! Leading me on!"
"'Mione. If I thought it was funny to play with your feelings, then I wouldn't have kissed you back. I would've pulled away and laughed in your face." I explained.
"I. I…you're." she stuttered, looking confused and ready to run away. I reached over and pulled her back to me. "What're you doing?" she asked, scared.
"I'm proving to you that I kissed you back for a better reason than to play a trick." Then I kissed her. Her body went stiff with shock, then she relaxed and her arms went around my neck. She moved closer and I smiled.
"Ron?" she mumbled against my lips.
"Mmm?"
"Why are you doing this?" she asked. I pulled away and looked her in the eye.
"Because I love you." I told her. She gasped loudly and nearly fell off the bed.
"You love me?"
"Yes, I do." I smiled, stroking her hair.
"But I…I love you. And that's why I was crying. Because I love you and I thought you could never love me. Because I'm an ugly know-it-all." She said, a few tears escaping from her eyes.
"You're not ugly!" I said, shocked. "You're beautiful! You're gorgeous! But yes, you are a know-it-all." I smiled.
"Ron!" she laughed for the first time in days.
"It's not a bad thing!" I grinned.
"Oh. You are hopeless."
"So are you!"
"Fine. Then we can both be hopeless together." She grinned, and I kissed her again.
"I think I could get used to this." I smiled, and didn't even get a reply. Hermione's mouth was a bit pre-occupied. And so was mine…
A/N: So, didja like it? I hope so! I'm not going to grovel for you to review. But I will beg: please please please please please please please please review! Mesa loves youse all berry much! I love you all!
Hope you had fun!
Catch you all next time.